尋死的念頭一出現,我就被自己給嚇到了。550Please respect copyright.PENANAcFj430JeFI
550Please respect copyright.PENANAWqMhRhO0Xo
「妳瘋了嗎?」550Please respect copyright.PENANAHxOwOlDWQw
550Please respect copyright.PENANAVHuGkX44YE
腦裡出現兩個我,理性的那個正在發飆,狠狠咒罵另一個我。550Please respect copyright.PENANAHgUNUvsuRD
550Please respect copyright.PENANAQQcnjw5gj3
而被罵的那個我,只是一個勁兒地哭。550Please respect copyright.PENANAUsLuKS036A
550Please respect copyright.PENANAtf6STpF29i
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事,便躲進被窩,用厚厚的被子蓋住全身,連頭都包在棉被裡,不讓任何光線進來。550Please respect copyright.PENANAcp3LmT4p6v
550Please respect copyright.PENANAXqW4wR4JTd
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡,我全身是汗,滿臉淚水。550Please respect copyright.PENANAGowVmvUMNZ
550Please respect copyright.PENANAPhJd7vPKcL
我側身把臉埋進枕頭,把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。550Please respect copyright.PENANAVcEbeJ964Y
550Please respect copyright.PENANA2uTTRGZocj
550Please respect copyright.PENANA50GZMdqip1
我往自己的腳下看,有一片草原。550Please respect copyright.PENANAwfygAqzwFS
550Please respect copyright.PENANAz0gE7JZLUK
面前有一條石頭道路,盡頭是顆大樹。550Please respect copyright.PENANA7zdzTzPJAH
550Please respect copyright.PENANAfLVuAudoS0
樹下站著一個人,太遠了,我看不清他的臉。550Please respect copyright.PENANAN4VdVbPqli
550Please respect copyright.PENANAJwnIDN6bKD
所以我走近,愈走愈近,直到我看清楚他是誰。550Please respect copyright.PENANAfKVjfOelTn
550Please respect copyright.PENANAwZbWXuIG7q
站在樹下的人是英傑。550Please respect copyright.PENANAbYzCJbevml
550Please respect copyright.PENANAMTddi6i8Xn
我跑向他,勾住他的手。550Please respect copyright.PENANArH3Lipx02b
550Please respect copyright.PENANAjVMkYxaC3D
他對我笑著,什麼話也沒說。550Please respect copyright.PENANAIKRFwZbGmR
550Please respect copyright.PENANAo6MiqaXcQS
我像是要把這些日子以來,所有發生的事情都告訴他,開始滔滔不絕地講。550Please respect copyright.PENANAr5VBwPCirt
550Please respect copyright.PENANATHxgKM4pip
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方,就停下來。550Please respect copyright.PENANAs77SCUJSuy
550Please respect copyright.PENANArcvLL48Zp7
我還在講,他轉頭看我,伸出手揉了我的頭,就像他每次做的那樣。550Please respect copyright.PENANAeJsa50s32j
550Please respect copyright.PENANA7pkt48VauP
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我張開眼睛,才知道自己夢見英傑了。550Please respect copyright.PENANAVwSTZr4nye
550Please respect copyright.PENANAia4AuTuFP2
550Please respect copyright.PENANAwJFx93lgSO
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。550Please respect copyright.PENANAatZjugRJFM
550Please respect copyright.PENANAlIU1uP8qjy
是太想念英傑了,還是壓力太大需要出口?550Please respect copyright.PENANAL3RYCyTI89
550Please respect copyright.PENANAtZ4ugkSLpc
或是…他真的怎麼了,才到我夢裡來?550Please respect copyright.PENANAIqoWpwEKSj
550Please respect copyright.PENANAOcglZBoQDD
我心裡很害怕是後者,但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。550Please respect copyright.PENANAQYb4cyrtHx
550Please respect copyright.PENANA1iJ03e8HI5
這個夢緩解了我的情緒,也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。550Please respect copyright.PENANAU0JnzuTmY8
550Please respect copyright.PENANAyBE5wWAId1
不管是什麼原因,都是英傑救了我。550Please respect copyright.PENANAPpeOZRg09m
550Please respect copyright.PENANAiJwtbZh2Yj
550Please respect copyright.PENANAL7QYiOfbb4
我度過了心中的那個坎,日子雖然沒有改變,但我的心態改變了。550Please respect copyright.PENANAG8RpFrKM6x
550Please respect copyright.PENANAV7iECLCxgy
「沒錯,都是我選的。所以,我要更努力才行。」550Please respect copyright.PENANAo5Vmi2UXgV
550Please respect copyright.PENANA57MS70800p
雖然,從那個時候開始,過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮,但我很幸運,擁有很多好朋友,如果我開口,他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我;就算我死愛面子不開口,他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢,繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。550Please respect copyright.PENANAhKB6K57tT5
550Please respect copyright.PENANAmSViQjKtyx
高中的最後一個學期,我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學(當時已有就學貸款,但沒有考慮,只想著沒錢就去賺錢,別念書好了),但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學,硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡,要我慢慢還,要我和他們一起畢業。550Please respect copyright.PENANAAMYdXImF9S
550Please respect copyright.PENANACqNSHtUoCg
我沒參加考試,畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢,卻欠了好多人情債。550Please respect copyright.PENANABodbS807mA
550Please respect copyright.PENANABGsFy9z73b
550Please respect copyright.PENANANuPFsh2Btc
生活條件穩定之後,也談了戀愛,生活圈的人換了幾輪,越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。550Please respect copyright.PENANAmFpVySzu3F
550Please respect copyright.PENANAtXKuapGZa0
我還是沒有更換手機號碼,一直抱著小小的希望,550Please respect copyright.PENANAWy6vMrbfBN
550Please respect copyright.PENANAq8EMNnyko4
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。550Please respect copyright.PENANAnfYYV2rW2U
550Please respect copyright.PENANAsQrMxQooPF
550Please respect copyright.PENANAOZrawLdbkz
某天,我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了,找也找不到。550Please respect copyright.PENANAOJZc21Jh3Q
550Please respect copyright.PENANAdrnRQYgh7M
我辦了卡片掛失,心裡希望有人撿到皮夾,會願意送還給我。550Please respect copyright.PENANA2uA8z0wV3t
550Please respect copyright.PENANAtDRpssjxWK
這時,我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片,也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。550Please respect copyright.PENANAop7ZPKGR5v
550Please respect copyright.PENANA3RPktaaHhc
550Please respect copyright.PENANANRyXoP8XHU
我的皮夾沒回來,英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。550Please respect copyright.PENANA0yoShm0hFs
550Please respect copyright.PENANALd9VlPYEPK
有時候,我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相,便努力回想那段日子,但畫面只是越來越模糊。550Please respect copyright.PENANA8SVu2OPpE0
550Please respect copyright.PENANABUFoI5ELPt
一年、兩年、三年,當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候,我卻看見他了。550Please respect copyright.PENANAaPfKfyHOCa
550Please respect copyright.PENANA7EdK8FnCTv
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在電視裡面。550Please respect copyright.PENANACIVwRi10Kx
550Please respect copyright.PENANAui1j9MWCCC
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550Please respect copyright.PENANAxVELPELGJ9
待續。
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