尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3pZNFEk6j
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuxQQXAv9x
「妳瘋了嗎？」523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3uFU8xoqtn
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3upKVOxMgo
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz9YxxYngmN
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡziP3j3HYTU
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNd7HxHHP8
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4G9UPySE89
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPb9mFy0WJ
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8N2bJarDGo
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sNzka6GEo
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWg716S9cHm
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRB0UGDhlDX
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5Yxzr74uX
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDoQ5TlsARr
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡafzmapnRYW
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrL4egB4kyq
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ40MTdDkq87
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmquAdFCXkd
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE0b41roWeS
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuBhlSBZxYN
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYqg3hrGIs
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuH5KBMYPI
站在樹下的人是英傑。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0NIYAZGgQ
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqo1QK42OJ
我跑向他，勾住他的手。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQlDpuLbCth
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Zxi1wIYhZ
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzQMujsYuu
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYf4X3K0ON7
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SYxI7RZ2t
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTbcGAHakR
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7I2V99fTal
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYB2NiqiZzi
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIGbWmms2j
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtniZClOwwk
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5Qu9wKNzo
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qI6WXAAmR
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2M5t7VUaqs
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFMyV55U8y
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46H0knE3eV
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTokejjZ4z7
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRsWbLx40kf
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb0Q9j0j7eb
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGKLDyn2CE
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPcctO6YWe
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKanvUTUeSl
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8w5A082w8
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvVmnEghXB
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlf8Ki7hD8v
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlhGkG9JQgd
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYD8dJ0rMHL
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOODAsnaPjY
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡreeBFl6BKJ
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgtVUFqBn16
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUnnqT1AsPN
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKY3HJcRo0
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjQNRLyM7L
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3IU9prvhrX
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0QvYzBfHM4
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXjd8opsDQp
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LDk6i9avq
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyU9uqUOJ9S
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYcs8udq6q
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWYiThFUO6Z
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWDwPRrC67c
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxhI9huvRu5
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1KpWh0RZt3
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKru1vCHa9
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOlzJZTGCsG
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2FaKFL9eTW
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIvBDlG6YO
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsH4XmtQgKo
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB6kIqutabM
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3kprD1oBc
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBeWjXTmLaV
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuOaQGORfF
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylD0vEXmID
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUk5qizSc4
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYUqubtBN8P
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YgcYvu9JC
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKm3aMQtXb
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXtDNowecyv
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3sWVHy0snc
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCp3pMYouNy
在電視裡面。523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcRC5GMBS2
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApNEqReOVm
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgyatIkKHA
523Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMPsq80cel
待續。
ns216.73.216.10da2
