事情要回到幾個月前。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WlxHxtPGm
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBpUYjUZa1
「豺姐，我想跟妳道歉。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa0kTZC9nxY
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkhqotWPt2
聊著聊著，他突然傳來這樣的訊息。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDUScgcS1ew
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOlI2tfcJd
「幹嘛道歉？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitdevifHt9
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHutlEYZne
「前一陣子，是不是有人密妳的skype，問妳想不想穿高跟鞋踩他？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJeSMSw4SHf
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnKqLqmjaN
我想了一下，好像有這麼回事。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKo3cHv6cBe
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGYEPePhHMD
「那個人就是我，但我應該馬上就被妳封鎖了吧？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdQ1PJNV2uI
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLHDH8B9Au9
「呃，因為skype是個常常會被陌生人亂加的程式，所以看到奇怪的訊息，我都是直接封鎖啊。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBj3CDPOEp
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDl0NPXJVOX
「拜託妳現在不要封鎖我。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0bXn90PqE
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqxls2fUYk
「不會啊，都是朋友了還鎖什麼，不過你是在惡作劇嗎？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJergHXNnA
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1ZQKgRhdv
「不是。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXtAJ0OAZcq
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMIC4bzfHb
然後，他開始和我說起，他的秘密。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigHgPNL6qL
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcDMsuEWwt
作為一個M，又稱「臣服者」（也有人說是「受虐者」，但我不喜歡這個稱呼），加上「戀物」及「戀足」，他從很久以前，就知道自己的喜好及性傾向，但沒有讓人知道，包括以前交的女朋友。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqKk1Jxy3n
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb9yvgS1cty
看到高跟鞋會興奮，產生被虐的幻想；女孩子只要稍微兇他，他也會心癢，更別說是聽到一些汙辱謾罵的詞彙了，那只會讓他更高興。
在他意識到自己的性傾向時，還是個小孩。他下意識的覺得自己不正常，隨之而來的厭惡自己及沮喪情緒很快吞沒了他。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6m4UMafqjb
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjggeboLmU
所以他掩飾、逃避，逼自己過「正常人」的生活及性生活。
直到過了幾年，進入資訊爆炸的時代，Google大神開始顯神威，在網路上發現同好的時候，他才漸漸接受自己。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6u8mfdUTez
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsok9c6mWow
「只是接受了自己，不代表別人肯接受這樣的我。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCyBT1byrg
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHIFQwrOCg
所以他還是持續隱瞞這件事，也許是過於刻意隱瞞，在戀愛的過程中，他反而像個大男人，所交到的女朋友，也都是小女人類型的，這讓他更不可能坦白自己了。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOM71lrgdM
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmsivQjJfDn
那天晚上，我幾乎聽完了他到目前為止的人生。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9n83Bc2iM0
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ8sr2DV4mV
「壓抑」，若要下個結論，就只有這兩個字。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2f6vPyJtW
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcTOSLv6ni8
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLz5e40rwSL
「為什麼告訴我？」
不過是朋友的朋友，一群朋友一起出去過幾次，我真的不認為我們有那麼熟。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuiZHN7XjQU
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3nO5X5agUq
「我信任妳。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX7KJ9THRu6
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8VlpcfQBsR
「噗，你也太容易相信別人了吧，萬一我是大嘴巴咧。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIwMi1xrZf
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNJ0wh479O
「妳應該不是。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEETGunDFtn
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1Rj0xmaLv
「這麼有信心？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ltYIsZMo7
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZTXUo8JSn0
「有一次去唱歌，那個誰不是在說某個人的八卦嗎，說她和哪個歌手有一腿，還墮胎怎麼的。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxKJCSf0qT
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFIxa326mc
「嗯？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb5sLKhC5Jk
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV088x9tH9B
「妳本來在跟大家聊天，聊到這個就自己喝起酒來，也不搭話。我記得那個當事者跟妳有過節。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6PJyHFQ63
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTC4jZX072w
「是有一些無聊的過節，你怎麼會知道？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgHJgnnBzu
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtorCMyni5W
「因為別人是大嘴巴。可是妳當時什麼都沒說，也不參與話題，所以我信妳。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk7ysNT1a6e
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXMtEvWyuE
竟然被偷偷觀察了啊。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vvF0ffWZ4
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyts07qn4Jk
「說不定我只是口渴了想喝酒啊。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHu6e9M7ONf
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqGhYeEUjN
「妳是大嘴巴嗎？」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxtYExuY5Pm
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmBUjZlo8I
「我不是，但你的故事可能會成為我的創作題材。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQjuoeu5qX9
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLn3ZsjtOn4
「哈哈哈。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuWak90o9k8
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ONALyjhja
「哈哈。」442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp6d4vruN6e
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVx6HboZGVi
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9agHUF3Ubj
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kohxm0t4x
他捧著高跟鞋，或許是我的錯覺，他的手彷彿在微微的顫抖。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzOFMLUiAek
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLIqAGrlSKO
我看著他小心翼翼的，將自己的臉側過，慢慢的貼在鞋頭的鞋面上，一秒，兩秒，三秒，然後離開它，看了看鞋，抬頭，盯著我。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEbz4xrQTTY
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIKcptEZVWv
他放下高跟鞋，頭低著，對我伸出手。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCODDJQ0hnJ
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUqIGX0SlT
我有點緊張，所以動作也很遲鈍。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDlhVzZe8Mw
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMVcsKM44g
把右腳放進他手裡的時候，我意識到自己的雙手緊捏著床沿。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7H3A4HHt6J
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGH1m0QE0Vf
他微微抬頭，眼神落在我的腳背上。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi16qxzulZh
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQVEFgqTnx
就像電影裡演的紳士，在女士的手背親吻那樣，他也這麼做了，只是把手換成腳。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKt6j0ktIk
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrPBQvM4twV
他輕輕地吻了我的腳背，就一下子，沒有停留，沒有聲響，我也沒有感到不舒服。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrEbEklFwp
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvrE9BHTScV
他拿起高跟鞋，從我的腳尖套上，再合上腳跟，確認高跟鞋穿好後，放下我的右腳。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTtT1PTuwDx
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zoperDXaj
接著，換左腳。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hug5e6ZlL
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsAvhKkzjZI
因為他的動作一直很溫柔，所以我的緊張感消失了大半。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXPBuC7nez
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiy9rnz4YGz
同樣的模式（或儀式）結束後，我的雙腳都穿上了高跟鞋，而他恢復了原本的姿勢，低著頭，跪著。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSsfLig7fb4
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4Kxxnhfpr
「頭抬起來。」我說。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZwOJgA23ie
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFb73VTBV4
命令的語氣。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH5gf3nAL94
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW74SrPGyRZ
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡktKPV5v4nh
442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK85HjXvGSk
待續。442Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2c6nL35egx
