尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpKszJdvdD
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1HTIGh8uDF
「妳瘋了嗎？」496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4OXXMMN0G
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyAjTPUklR
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaSl8z8a9It
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgoc98Uj41n
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqNpi9x0KUd
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitgwG8sEdm
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAleKeKB03j
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN1x3Vjft3F
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdCmaWlQeNP
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9eIckYhFNH
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHdJ1XHnZa
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJeLASNq48
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDKapcDaRK
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzlr1VelMt9
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVJnBadQflB
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡear2ie9Akj
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDEW8X3q0G
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvsOoxp4sEw
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5QKJNbtFt
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmRDP0XrKw
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8QLoNBBgmQ
站在樹下的人是英傑。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUF6M7maIon
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7AQRrzx0Nm
我跑向他，勾住他的手。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQXeuP36QJJ
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSj4W9NbVxe
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFMomuLQTP
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJiDB1k8CKu
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCCumQ2CNk
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRiWCWA6ha4
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQENgUW5uH6
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lmdrtxjvd
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIkOy2H5HTi
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcXUDdpQbBV
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi9hcGDzKfm
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAj2E8lVTgf
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfaNQQ3CpzE
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMebFwLkFk
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMjyu7mvnjb
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5AlzFdltw
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrPFv27Jam2
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5rxwNW46RI
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmtN2Ms3q4
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKlvAaOAKz
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9c98duhLOF
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4Vy6lnvjN
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf24UBQt2re
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxkf4A4tIpw
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHPELkBi9Cq
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡti9C9xbaob
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1xRMNP58RT
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46KqJdwRAj
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYNgKEj2UEC
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QXLSSwLqi
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjQqYHDOLJ
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MRKxDUv7x
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJujdSMPGbz
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4Jpt6m1he
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHQ8lOJppUQ
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBWmmYfwrAn
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxGyTBh88W
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybq4pKjBVC
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVwDAthBfi
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFlS6TOnv1s
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUNAe5Rxyp
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFX25qu3Cpc
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYsv6GZRIdz
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1dVuldNt1
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZkxU9IlZL
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqeeb5WHw0u
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1zjn4gWfW
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIotqs6FgNx
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPneJkd7o6K
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCncohCulZ1
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJboBtSRFay
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbEVVLi7PJ
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqsF7rfozu
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2B6AHJNmKV
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8cC3MSqoUT
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGYDkZxwP8
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxdy1BTwcLP
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVHKRDupim
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡilePY9GQos
在電視裡面。496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpIh8HyYPQ
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKK5lSLTo6U
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhFaWfk7MP
496Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnUioAXLCi8
待續。
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