事情要回到幾個月前。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg723bS7BOm
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgadzIueZ8I
「豺姐，我想跟妳道歉。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvGzNUmL58r
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSgKVw1mDO
聊著聊著，他突然傳來這樣的訊息。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaGKd6Rk6A6
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuKINj5YSd
「幹嘛道歉？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Aul6UUPTF
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGFWqxjsNLp
「前一陣子，是不是有人密妳的skype，問妳想不想穿高跟鞋踩他？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ2Y7QOo5ko
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrWpyvb5DvX
我想了一下，好像有這麼回事。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU7zjcq6qqc
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP9YN7rfIr8
「那個人就是我，但我應該馬上就被妳封鎖了吧？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlH5M8jHDcz
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrs4M6nrqCA
「呃，因為skype是個常常會被陌生人亂加的程式，所以看到奇怪的訊息，我都是直接封鎖啊。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Jl0lOMZsI
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMXbRrodGvg
「拜託妳現在不要封鎖我。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ytaHht91p
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAYwRMdG5on
「不會啊，都是朋友了還鎖什麼，不過你是在惡作劇嗎？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90snkqX08L
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJrb5Rr4j8V
「不是。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡws9jJvulkH
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jGO7vgDnM
然後，他開始和我說起，他的秘密。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRuff1u0ge
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdghblfEQZQ
作為一個M，又稱「臣服者」（也有人說是「受虐者」，但我不喜歡這個稱呼），加上「戀物」及「戀足」，他從很久以前，就知道自己的喜好及性傾向，但沒有讓人知道，包括以前交的女朋友。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfGDw5mxNB
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowMn5S5scK
看到高跟鞋會興奮，產生被虐的幻想；女孩子只要稍微兇他，他也會心癢，更別說是聽到一些汙辱謾罵的詞彙了，那只會讓他更高興。
在他意識到自己的性傾向時，還是個小孩。他下意識的覺得自己不正常，隨之而來的厭惡自己及沮喪情緒很快吞沒了他。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk53d1RL38X
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL8m7SKxq7c
所以他掩飾、逃避，逼自己過「正常人」的生活及性生活。
直到過了幾年，進入資訊爆炸的時代，Google大神開始顯神威，在網路上發現同好的時候，他才漸漸接受自己。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbeO8n0wiRg
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nQQKyX7h7
「只是接受了自己，不代表別人肯接受這樣的我。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyVNPAt43BF
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfi6cEQ334U
所以他還是持續隱瞞這件事，也許是過於刻意隱瞞，在戀愛的過程中，他反而像個大男人，所交到的女朋友，也都是小女人類型的，這讓他更不可能坦白自己了。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEDynP5Vmr8
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtv7r8DMVZ
那天晚上，我幾乎聽完了他到目前為止的人生。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBoPWNsP7S
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvLWX3mQcI
「壓抑」，若要下個結論，就只有這兩個字。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡinGTBmrI5n
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCYxmHNpUY
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZ5BCHakbj
「為什麼告訴我？」
不過是朋友的朋友，一群朋友一起出去過幾次，我真的不認為我們有那麼熟。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRStTJhIdSi
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9CUHUob9pZ
「我信任妳。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGeoJjSPyDX
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCApoqpnXuR
「噗，你也太容易相信別人了吧，萬一我是大嘴巴咧。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8yBeiadQs
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrekCiholFw
「妳應該不是。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4QAbZaCIYa
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsrtbOIh22
「這麼有信心？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQaDUijvTJT
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojFYpc13mu
「有一次去唱歌，那個誰不是在說某個人的八卦嗎，說她和哪個歌手有一腿，還墮胎怎麼的。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMo8m5hgWq
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZJOu014Yu
「嗯？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRcO8KtvX4
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡboq8ueOgAd
「妳本來在跟大家聊天，聊到這個就自己喝起酒來，也不搭話。我記得那個當事者跟妳有過節。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6asRXLCbiI
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxinteprGO
「是有一些無聊的過節，你怎麼會知道？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2L5SQAPJ2
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnzKy5ZybEM
「因為別人是大嘴巴。可是妳當時什麼都沒說，也不參與話題，所以我信妳。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9MXDyDGrL
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIEIqwpysc
竟然被偷偷觀察了啊。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BYKimSdcY
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYfeNp1LdXg
「說不定我只是口渴了想喝酒啊。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvnz5Mvf2l5
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdAAfTMr3nC
「妳是大嘴巴嗎？」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8t3nMGtes0
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLElRBKdV9y
「我不是，但你的故事可能會成為我的創作題材。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfSqFU28R9r
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDKwXcZkpDW
「哈哈哈。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡga98utzv32
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuKZxudRMVZ
「哈哈。」416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnS6CLH68HU
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRIsAHkvW9b
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡankjxVPpOz
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwg0GPMlnA
他捧著高跟鞋，或許是我的錯覺，他的手彷彿在微微的顫抖。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlJ8jpVtYE
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7thLCbR1AO
我看著他小心翼翼的，將自己的臉側過，慢慢的貼在鞋頭的鞋面上，一秒，兩秒，三秒，然後離開它，看了看鞋，抬頭，盯著我。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfQKESVh9K
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHgI35d7iED
他放下高跟鞋，頭低著，對我伸出手。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd0ynpZTM67
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuMRSbHIhMK
我有點緊張，所以動作也很遲鈍。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8SJaTetD13
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJoPjdnzfpQ
把右腳放進他手裡的時候，我意識到自己的雙手緊捏著床沿。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2pmKbh4ER
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveguOG3yEu
他微微抬頭，眼神落在我的腳背上。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGZnKTeIiT
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Ern9eJ4i2
就像電影裡演的紳士，在女士的手背親吻那樣，他也這麼做了，只是把手換成腳。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Dmm0MuhPi
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP22tQhOzri
他輕輕地吻了我的腳背，就一下子，沒有停留，沒有聲響，我也沒有感到不舒服。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQzvbFaejdL
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc90hV7DSwc
他拿起高跟鞋，從我的腳尖套上，再合上腳跟，確認高跟鞋穿好後，放下我的右腳。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1hhKn0GfLa
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMuwfsHfOUY
接著，換左腳。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYuD6jQMyr
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ConzAQ63v
因為他的動作一直很溫柔，所以我的緊張感消失了大半。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJUVQF49Ym
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPZcRE9Z5Ll
同樣的模式（或儀式）結束後，我的雙腳都穿上了高跟鞋，而他恢復了原本的姿勢，低著頭，跪著。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgukkGfg55
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4EMGTuLbHT
「頭抬起來。」我說。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoL3uJlVcNd
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEES6TmMyej
命令的語氣。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6xcYVkQQQW
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTVaiAlYarN
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyv6XbbAzbk
416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjdcNJp9MPI
待續。416Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Y20gWT1b3
