尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAt3Db23r5L
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeM3a49uIQC
「妳瘋了嗎？」566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs7pLcVVA6q
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBTU7QFysXN
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfHeoc1vXG
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4bA6TLJ86D
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCWC9YRvb5
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5cX3RMygV
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡea0H0yvhSC
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeZySsBmBB
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡptRmMrzOUh
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFwv8z1H38
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOlQtwCqN8l
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPC6ZuQ6d6b
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNfLXTPlJj
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0nwZLr4bud
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxxljapuUK
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZswOJAipH
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSi5vaFHTya
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPZ1tiI2Hb
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTQPvhUdpX
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXkx55nXKR
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYioyrpSCMb
站在樹下的人是英傑。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvf5xkZ0hx
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SDntZdPlG
我跑向他，勾住他的手。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYLMShhGk5b
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjg2yRksK0A
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8ju0fgoxL
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTwp6Wc91c0
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ28X2Vf4OKd
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJSkiO3TZG
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gn5Iwn9uJ
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEhevbdPBW
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡemRnwOm271
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmE96KvvJQ
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TS3cXoHC7
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3fE0Yw6ty
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFr9207UIB
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRJ91BvfN5
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJLSAwD5Np
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBX6k8CLv0
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCkcjiazjcA
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnQuCyzg7mP
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0J0Hd8z3lz
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHaQG06cY0
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4jarBEHJ5
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR3U3zjN1M7
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtISCrcVslS
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQOY93mvbF
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwFo6vDxUx5
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxDMOlTXDO
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdE8PBHom6S
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsslP2eWEAS
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEG71zRa1j
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD99zZUb9l1
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtu1EHq3Lr4
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQt2fu4fdYI
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3d5UGkTlIk
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmX990fbdWU
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡupMVPwoDPx
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡncq5rkQw1z
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQ2DWXb5tr
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPZBm8d2je
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV0ofvX2Nmp
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2VONzVu9kJ
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ba8WmSS2M
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEzVibXFLb
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhoUMQ3ZSA6
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSEiKvLWwkT
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46Mt8lQxkK
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9RBMLeqhv
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUeHTxbi10r
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEaI0QFtWn
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcP1Y5QE1dW
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVxG81E4unB
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dvM1BvIOP
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPn03bbxmBu
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5eLBaYqzpO
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLVajOZryv1
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMMGIOOS8u
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYEQ5LsjVHz
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6aAwxIpl2E
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi94C7enRK5
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVWnkjPQGOA
在電視裡面。566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbbIbHkMC9h
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0vbiBF7AhL
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAdWVSVYrS
566Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtY6fh1e8Ev
待續。
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