第五十九．五章747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yOxhQgKBq
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpL0yVrLw6
「何鵬侑，其實你對我仲有無感覺？」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpSrnxLUZm
我終於都決定要問一次，這一個一直埋藏在我心底裡的問題。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxav4GSawP
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaDBLQiEPXA
我已經拖延了Alvin不少時間了，他可是還要回去為姐姐買晚飯的。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW0GwNrIDvn
雖然心裡是這樣想著，但我還是把他從醫院帶來了車站，再由車站從帶到來了現在暫住的家樓下。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXD9FvmV83
原因就只是希望能夠問道他這一條問題……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZwKLzBSOiC
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5fqMglsqZf
但當我問完後，只見Alvin思考了一會。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpY9wKUGzF4
拜託，你一定要回答「已經放下了我」。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBic6KuiEW
這樣我才能夠有藉口都讓自己放下你的……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2wEbudlY9j
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3HucEguxj
「你要我老實答嘅話，喺仲有感覺。」他思考完後，就看著我說。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnfAc29S0S
聽到他這一個答案，我的大腦頓時如同電腦當了機一樣。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWyMn1S0wj
他這個答案，完全打亂了我原先預定好要與他說的話……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtZ5YN0UUqE
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKx7hGr0rQY
我初初是希望他會回答我「已經放下了」。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjx7IsT2ub2
然後我就可以順勢假裝自己都放下，並與他再一次由「朋友」的關係，重新再來一次。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8c5bCGbKd1
但現在他竟然直接回答我「還有感覺」……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5F95SoaM9J
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuuC9aU8BTW
單單就是這一句，就足夠令我已經很想立即走進他懷中，然後跟他說，其實我都一樣還沒有放下……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYc9U5clxlY
雖然感性上，我真的想與他再一起。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmWImL1WAT2
但理性上告訴了我，一開始令他失望及傷心的人……是我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm6abcmAxgR
即使我知道一切都已經過去了……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1b76Vpz1mB
但是曾經的傷痕裂縫，是沒法輕易就能填補得到的。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJCpndVdDn
我或許已經沒有資格，在他的心裡再佔上一格。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdwosbCkM06
我更不能再在他的心裡刻上第二條傷痕……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSCSMyDV7YO
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI70xDW5eZ3
但是這刻情緒已經有一點開始湧現出來。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKYYQoaSx5W
然而，我都一定要假裝冷靜，不能讓他看穿我此刻的情緒。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYhInB4XOH
於是我便深呼吸了一下，然後說：「都過咗成年啦……點會仲有感覺架……」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡboATFapXJr
我說著的時候，心裡其實都一陣隱隱作痛。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPV38OoUivJ
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkl0auRBBYD
「原先都無乜架啦，但同你相遇翻之後，個感覺即刻出翻哂嚟。」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKawJAvJJqv
他回答著我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFkfhOMlrkT
為何你一定要說這些說話呢……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8CbWgzkcu3
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2sPNa1aXxK
雖然心裡很難受，但我自己弄出來的問題，就必須由我自己來解決。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4YoFYidibb
「問題就喺呢到啦！」我立即回應他。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJ3Mn0YfOp
而他都很快就看著我問：「問題？」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCEwJh8G7I
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrLU5K4BA0
「我哋依家嘅身份仲喺前男女朋友，所以一見翻臉就自然會咩感覺都出翻哂嚟……明明大家都已經分咗手成年，但你仲喺好似move on唔到咁。」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRJkRqNhea
我都不知道自己正在亂說著甚麼……但我說完後，就立即轉身背向著他。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuNoc5bedAs
因為我真的開始壓抑不住心中一直不斷湧現著的情緒了……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHoImkiknb
每當我說一句與心相反的說話，我就變得更難受了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2JDx1xsUA
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLzpDjTpSTR
「你咁樣講，好似講到自己已經放低咗咁。」他又回應了我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYx6syY1JOj
原來你認為我已經將你放下了嗎……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSIKZ6DZNd
雖然，心真的很痛，但既然已經決定了，我就必須繼續演下去。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrznw6ANTDm
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrCkT48rru
「我……放低咗架啦！」我說道。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6PnZmkT8H2
但這時候，淚水都終於壓抑不住，從雙眼開始流下來。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO5hvflokRn
對不起……我撒謊了，但這都是為了你好。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtc48qkRTAh
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSk0O6BxEs4
「喺啊……你放低到咪好囉……唔似我咁。」他回答我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRhfqMjF3f
拜託不要再說這些說話了……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCm9cfYyUB
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzvGHSzvmb
此刻，聽完他的說話後，我的心真很痛，很痛，很痛。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcR6VI1l6n
但是我還得繼續演下去……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCMEwqWqUTD
於是我強忍著眼淚，並轉身看著他。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvZKFFwbAk
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxt9enVW6O
幸好，這時旁邊的的路燈剛好因時限而熄滅了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwYwO1TiiNp
這麼暗的環境，他應該是看不到我的表情的……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc695td0dRB
於是我便立即向他說道：「所以我覺得點解有時我哋喺班房到會有啲尷尬就喺因為我哋身份嘅問題。」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQDVQ60TbL7
句子之間完全沒有停頓，因為一停頓下來，我就會又想哭了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkzEEwhmifC
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKr5jKobRpY
「身份嘅問題？」他問道我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs3g6b8sZUE
「你仲覺得我喺你前女朋友，所以有時喺交流上先會有啲尷尬……你應該好似我咁放低哂，然後就以一個新嘅身份去面對你！」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxI0ZAUvrCc
我看似很有道理地說著。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Ipr0SID0s
但其實我根本就沒有放下過對他的感情。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCXtJaH7vj
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj51rnJ5gHO
接著，Alvin竟然沒有回應我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05oqA1fN3d
於是我都只好繼續說：「不如我哋重新嚟過，唔喺曾經嘅戀人，唔喺前男女朋友，而喺重新由朋友呢個關係再開始過。」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHUG4aJHVOz
本來這一句說話，是打算一開始在他回答我「已經放下了」後，就接著說的。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtoFWwXRZz
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyVabTuTWPY
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQumzuttne
雖然我都希望我們能從「朋友」再重新開始過。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡngMcdn0Z6M
但至少都讓我有一個藉口去先放下對你的感情吧……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnzbtJtH4sl
現在這樣反而讓我更不想去放下對你的感情了……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvwWwEY1p6
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXC50BK80H
「你嘅意思即喺我哋做翻朋友，好似啲典型嘅分手對白咁。」他又開口說道了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡltf9whH1wX
「咁唔好咩？你又可以放低我，而我哋又可以繼續正正常常咁交流……」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY7YSMm1Wo9
這對現在的我們來說，應該是最好的解決方法了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Md0rYNyes
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KbpHhRxu2
接著Alvin都沉默了一會，看來他都應該是在思考著這個唯一的解決方法。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJpX6MVrWu
而很快，他都彷彿想通了一樣開口說：「好啦，我哋做翻朋友啦咁！由今日起，我哋就只喺朋友。」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WKBk520oy
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vbgljBBRZ
當我聽到他說我們只是朋友時，我就知道「何鵬侑與蔡霜玥」這段關係，在這一瞬間……完結了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPyNwg9mtK
雖然這本來就是我的目的，但為何當我聽到他所說後，我反而更難過……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Jq6FOOhz3
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1A2hAcq4q
我的眼淚又開始從雙眼流下。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLnI5meaeSJ
但現在與他這麼近的距離，他一定會看得見我臉上的淚水。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUICIEysTqi
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡse35MDMgyU
因此，我只好立即轉身，並強忍著淚水說：「好啦……時間唔早啦，你……快啲翻去買飯比家姐啦，我都要上翻去煮自己份晚餐啦！」747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk9Dvl1hlRs
接著，我就背向著他揮手，並往前面的方向跑去。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZhsDlNQ2u
我必須離開他，因為我實在不能再忍耐下去了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ziqY9Vuh3
再這樣下去，我一定會在他面前痛哭出來的……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8flv42q1b
我不想他後悔。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8luJCnMdV
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡosztFHTBy0
我跑著的時候，並沒有理會身後的Alvin是站著還是轉身離開了。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttiqS66L5L
淚水已經不斷從雙眼滲出，而我都只能加快腳步走回家中。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZt5KnjDWH
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEJ3XFKd7q
接著，當我成功回到家，打開了門進到屋內，並閉上門的一剎那……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHwvlhiyyb
我直接跪在地上，大聲地哭起來……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJxpvtoOot
對上一次，我會這樣大聲哭出來，應該是與Alvin提出分手後……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrr2UKa4eHZ
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzLH1DDBE32
「好痛，好痛，好痛……」我哭著的同時一直說著。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsxyWH2Swu
這一刻，並沒有任何人能在我身邊能夠安慰及陪伴著我。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1UQaUHdfe
而我都只能一直痛哭著，直到淚水流乾涸為止……747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Yb1yXffd2
747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSwHGnnTdO7
對不起，何鵬侑，是我親手摧毀了我們這一段感情的。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgtphe9CFEY
過去你所認識的蔡霜玥，將不再存在。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1Mc8RBjre
而接下來的蔡霜玥，都只會與你以「朋友」的身份繼續相處。747Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOEYsgc6NUs
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