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根據居民的指示，我沿著竹林小徑走了一整天，終於到達目的地：一間全竹結構的寺廟。它比我預想中更為破落，冷冷清清的。我抬頭望向高高懸掛在山門的匾額，寫著「竹寺」。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnN3Cap1Z5
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMR7ZIT3geg
蠻有意思的名字。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLYGjVnh3X
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7Rm59AYV2
當我正要邁步內進時，一個打扮樸素的瘦削大叔剛好開門踏出。四目交投，雙方都愣住了幾秒。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdO19NX1Pj
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr56fK6Letu
「歡迎內進。」沒等我回答，大叔已轉身為我引路。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvY3o5HvW4b
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tXNDukBMS
眼見天色漸暗，我不再磨蹭，看能否找到綫索，省卻逗留此地的時間：「不好意思喔，大叔！請問黃XX女士住在這裡嗎？」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7exvx8mte
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRgEWimaRA
大叔的腳步突兀地戛然而止。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkTfS4kxFI
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpBych4cJY8
是我的提問過於唐突嗎？684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ3UoRzAaWb
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bvxmH8djq
大叔回頭仔細打量我，神色疑惑，似乎在猜測我和黃女士的關係。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiyIzjKM5we
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqaoZVJSwMH
「有人託我將信件親手轉交予黃女士。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72miFQi8p3
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8WGIUFLZIR
「黃女士已離開這裡好一段時間，不知何時會回來……甚或是不知會否回來。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0HsFLjBQH
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ilOlIsH29
「她有透露去處嗎？」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj4W3bG0uRT
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaYoRYb0GpY
「沒有……我帶你去她昔日的房間試找綫索。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPo0Covpnhd
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuKBHBe4MI
大叔再次邁步，步履沒有之前的輕，重若銀鉛。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPxNZpuEte
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRCjysNpur
陰冷的空氣，空洞的房間，慘白的牆身，最基本的傢俬和雜物。沒有生活的氣息。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZ5z2zUFK2
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1L2RO2mab
「剛才在門外碰見你，也還真令我驚訝。」大叔沒有進入房間，逕自在門外呢呢喃喃。「竹寺曾香火鼎盛。後來毗鄰的兩個小鎮分別新建更大更金碧輝煌的寺廟，無意間將信眾分流開去，到來竹寺掛單的僧侶亦逐漸減少，住持最終徇眾要求到另一寺廟主持大局。他指派我長駐於此，打掃清潔，說要方便途經的旅客。我一直覺得他想多了，豈料今天就遇見你。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dbBxeVprX
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvmsvhUhEJ
「可能佛祖不想我白走一趟。」我話中有話，提醒侍奉佛祖的大叔不要忘記佛祖的存在，萬萬不能撒謊。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYKSdAm6cR
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vvjaiasvM
「我可以明天帶你見住持。他有掛單紀錄，可能有黃女士的聯絡資料。」大叔也不是省油的燈，簡單幾句就將我逼至沒有退路的位置：「但我希望你能先對我坦白事情的前因後果。住持是個大忙人。我可不希望為他增添不必要的麻煩。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzFuHIwIzU
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpngWQFQa6K
我只得坦白交代。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojE3hnHL1a
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTI07h829Rf
我的妻子過身了。臨終前，她希望我能預留一年時間為她完成唯一的遺願：親手將遺書交予離家出走多年的生母——黃女士。事隔多年，黃女士曾在多個地方落腳。我每次根據綫索趕至時，她早已遷居。輾轉間，我追尋至竹寺……684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOW5WK7TIrJ
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvs564IAw3
「距離一年限期，還剩多少日子？」大叔生起關切之情。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElD7hrjWYs
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO01AqdRzUF
「三日。竹寺很可能是我的最後機會。」我加倍留意他的神色舉止。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hJPghRTf5
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAwKSgQJ7H0
「不考慮延長？」大叔表現出來的的關切絕對超過一個陌生人該有的限度。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVzgMGzhfA
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttSF96ADSj
「妻子信緣份。她認為努力過後仍沒能找到，證明彼此有緣無份，毋須強求。她還叮囑我要燒毀遺書。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcezUQCq4hn
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IdOL2j21Y
大叔若有所思後，講出驚人的一句：「若果一年期限屆滿時仍找不到黃女士，介意給我看看遺書嗎？」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTdbdKzimWn
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlygmWl6eB6
「極度介意！」我心裡認定大叔有事隱瞞。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxhqQI3bAQ0
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbxPVMVzwwg
尷尬氣氛令大叔不再多話。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcksD0jyPu
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Csmi91DgB
晚餐後，大叔在其他地方忙著，我則留在房間對著愛妻的照片痛哭一場。哭過以後，壓力得以紓緩，但心頭卻未能添加半分澄明，混沌混濁。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2UdkR1A2b
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXriQ44rrZP
我離房在寺內溜達散心。逛著逛著，忽爾看見大叔彎腰對著花園中的小樹喁喁細語，臉上盡是蜜甜。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTBsY8KDk7
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQcVO1CpU7
我上前跟大叔打招呼。他微笑回應，和顏悅色，渾身散發著慈祥氣息，沒有白天時的隔膜。我嘗試放下戒心，開心見誠與他聊天。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3x3eSRPLHd
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzPhEE9ZXH
不知怎地，聊著聊著，話題竟牽到大叔的心事去。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC4c9GvYFgf
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6iR9gM8al
「貪，使人執著於一切順情之境。嗔，使人執著於一切違情之境。痴，使人不明白真理，致使生起貪嗔。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnSTGuzeJc
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8Id5ncI7V
我痴愚半生，痛苦不已。到此地求法，希望住持指點迷津。但他認為我凡心未盡，要我留在這裡靜思。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMQH3w1SH4T
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡegUpea4lIr
我在竹寺侍奉多年，住持依然不為所動。我以為他在敷衍我。今天遇到你，我才明白住持所言非虛：任何無關的人事物都可輕易勾起我對逝去伴侶的思念。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9V1IJlmGqm
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5bBipU6E3
我終於明白初時大叔何以對我不太友善。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhvz8XqOIH
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYCBjD0H3y
將心比心。喪妻之後，任何人事物均能勾起我和對太太的思念。我曾抱怨上天幸災樂禍，何解不讓我安靜避世。我已盡力放下身邊一切，辭掉工作，不聯絡親友，遷出愛巢，但偏偏愛妻的遺願就是要我去彌補她的畢生遺憾！我沒有一刻能放下她，因為我的分分秒秒就是為她而過。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstX9FuxCM4
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3yCRHPfaG
那種痛苦實非筆墨所能形容。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgPENxjqLg
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQYnQajsE4
「你的妻子真聰明，給你的痛苦設下一年期限。只要你在這一年裡拼命為她圓願，往後也就了無遺憾或悔疚。我可沒那麼幸運，不知要拖著這副臭皮囊乾等到哪年哪月哪日……」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAaVnO9reAx
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jln1yCBhK
說罷，他跟我和小樹說晚安，然後揚長而去。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PEpbHZWR8
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOdN11ExL6Q
翌日，我翻遍整間竹寺亦找不到大叔，只在他的房間找到他留給我的手繪地圖。我跟著地圖的指示走了大半天，來到住持現處的寺廟。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9xZ1fX87Q
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe51f09MEYS
住持聽罷我的經歷後，不禁黯然慨嘆：「黃女士始終凡心未盡……」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7UcDThfrU7
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqfwGRoY0tJ
黃女士當年拋夫棄女，與情夫私奔。豈料甜蜜日子不長久，情夫患急病逝世。黃女士大受打擊，認為是自己作孽甚深，連累情夫。她來到竹寺，望住持能指點迷津。住持認為她深陷激動情緒當中，容易作出錯誤選擇，逐要她在竹寺靜思己過。可惜她半夜逃離。當黃女士重臨竹寺時，她已花光積蓄在黑市做手術整容及變性，以情夫的外表現身……684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKxOe4woE9t
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf8yrydVC4w
「大叔就是黃女士？」我不禁驚呼。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YGAFcaAYd
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzt8VULrHav
震驚之情瞬間即逝，取而代之的是說不出的矛盾。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQqhihwOrj
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqHrrsbmDO
這個人，我恨不來，亦原諒不了。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1idzu1gs3c
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbCU2tUwCc
翌日，我和住持往竹寺走一趟。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR7WBilFuwG
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4KRRf4Tkb0
寺前，我倆不約而同抬頭望向匾額。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4cW7fO44m
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1rO9mzkgpH
「你知道『竹寺』何以得名嗎？」住持問。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqBCOF9sBm
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Iot51UY82
「等？」我的猜想有如初來之時。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsz0Y2Dp4R
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8n6ubt0J1Q
「這名字只不過是客觀描述寺廟本身。」住持揚手指向全竹結構的寺廟：「大家實在想多了，對自己的想像投放情感，賦予它過多的意義，致使看不見眼前真象。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwrrrhGjV8R
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgpUyJVGR0
我驀地憶起大叔前夜的說話。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9NEmsYZA4Z
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHk7RNhdmA
住持直接走往花園。不出他所料，小樹已被連根拔起，樹下土地被挖出一個大坑，足以容納一個成人。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIqx5uNkhj
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwUlbbjUHr
我心頭一涼，頓時明白那是甚麼一回事：多年以來，情夫的屍首一直埋在這裡。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7EoBGLz6r
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNNSAy9NJDs
我鼻頭一酸，淚如雨下。684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxiZzZ3j6GC
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cXDDiDku6
「『強逼自己放下執著』也是一種執著。」684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxTtX7KB7S
684Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RYi3lBFyr
住持淡然望天，開始為一切生者亡者誦經。
