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我在書枱前呆了大半日。熱茶已涼，但我未嚐半口，心思都在眼前電腦屏幕上——剛輸入的文字不停被刪。字越少，心越亂，人越躁。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5k44lmqT9
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJYBEM2EiL
不了。受不了。我離座往廚房換茶去。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdqQLbP1LZ
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZAnSv49mA9
廳中老妻瞄我半眼，大概知道發生甚麼事，沒有作聲，繼續看電視。我對她的不表態不勝感激——她以最聰明的方法維護我的尊嚴。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWTnaZwW1Ye
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBWV2M9EjoK
滾水撞上茶葉，水仙香氣隨著冉升白煙溢散開去。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72mHmU1XFz
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpovYAzUaEb
壓力似乎一併消散。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriCHjpELxM
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXsTg04Iz2
茶盡。我再續杯。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcLhErEZ5ol
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHX0cM4ggoq
添茶不是長遠之計——屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3iMOTNlu7J
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQVfF28GPf
嘆一口氣，慨嘆自己太天真可愛。怎麼會相信自己有寫作天分，而且一信就是幾十年。幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我只得不停安慰自己說旁人不識貨。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ5OmKxMyBS
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3ojhdHuod
口不對心。心裡其實清楚自己料子如何。但我還是堅持寫下去。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliPFusUkl0
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOb3xPK4hSo
是習慣、面子、尊嚴緣故，更是不想承認自己做了一個長達幾十年的白日夢。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQKSLysATR9
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NOGvMghRE
夢醒一場空。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDb7vpXKmt
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HDU9N7a28
我本平庸，無甚專長，唯獨寫作能力相對身邊友儕略高丁點。丁點而已，卻足以讓我樂透幾十年。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQSgh8XLyD
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWHOOEM3ls
工作不順利時，我會告訴自己——我的專長不在工作上，所以被罵亦是無可厚非；人際關係不如意時，我會告訴自己——如果世人只能用文字溝通，我該是表達能力最好的人；走倒運時，我會告訴自己——我正在為快要誕生的偉大作品累積靈感……447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4p8hBDSVQM
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1m5DHSb3H
一切都是有意義的。如果我真有寫作天分的話。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBxMWBxcWa
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6I78J2nzwY
捧著熱茶回到座位。身在心在能力不在。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCn4yfR5MS
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Bv42mRRj7
在刺眼的屏幕白頁前，我又嘆一口氣。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrtBFWMHJ20
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvr20by8s2s
我不曾長大，仍是幾十年前那個我，沉浸在中文老師讚賞的我。同學們紛表羨慕我的寫作天份，請教我如何想出精彩故事、練出動人文筆。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3l6jXJckDm
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXmtMgN0ORt
我沾沾自喜。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqq1R8XcGFx
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWxiUdsYCo
細心回想，我當時已覺竅門不在天分，而是努力。努力鑽研文字的運用，努力細味名著佳作當中的韻味，努力思考故事情節起伏，努力觀察分析人世百態……名副其實的將勤補拙。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXM7fQ6frGE
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4BGdML5quT
但我沒有向同學們坦白。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HAcutG3qH
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFN4ZocKO67
因為我喜歡被讚賞的感覺。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGbnPdI6OMk
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQDu1os4VxA
努力，努力，努力。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSUwfp0653A
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFjaBr8eRqX
我的寫作技巧與日俱增，亦在多個學屆寫作比賽中獲獎。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4isbWKs0w
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiv3rXnbRCI
我以為自己將來鐵定能夠成為作家。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1t4xtD0oTi
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMEJyX4FJV
以為。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVYK0ewdGfc
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡziQ9TWOCJk
告別校園後，我成為一個普通文職。普通收入，普通打扮，普通生活。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1VKrg5VhPv
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYv8XAosVK
普通得輕易被取代。普通得難以承受。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSLHDDQYSXw
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7p0hmUbwZ3
我不得不告訴自己我是多麼的有寫作天份！我是多麼的獨特！447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlOVidy7VI
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ49LMuOck90
某夜下班回家，我泡了一壺水仙，乘著茶香全情投入寫作世界。沒有外物打擾，我的世界只有我。一切如願。那麼順心，那麼安寧，那麼快樂。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5pxq9mBLe
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeleZczBfLn
我的作品感動了我。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWYOPfIPwht
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEMH9HnHf0
我希望藉此找到更多懂我的人。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFMHiHFV88
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSdSYFYQArn
幾十年來，不停寫，不停發表，不停被無視。我的世界與真實世界不斷相互碰撞。面對無止境的打擊，我不曾問自己為何堅持。因為一旦心生此等疑問，變相在內心種下「自我質疑」的根苗，一發不可收拾。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpto8w9nlTp
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsacFiuYjA9
無法接受自己幾十年堅持建基於一個沒可能實現的夢想。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZdMBfjaJ6
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLJrW5wBse
無法承受自己生來就是如此普通、平凡、平庸……447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9iKLsuVT7
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG2gokJO5C6
熱茶又涼了。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38G6dO5XEm
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWeO3L5xea
屏幕白頁上始終沒有片言隻字。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡln3uw9dcmD
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwuliPq89ra
老妻繼續以不表態維護我的尊嚴。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WZ0wr8DFD
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSAZxCtiGQ
我的作品只感動了我。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOpE6b7r9WN
447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzuQ0UehL6p
因為我的感受只有我讀得懂。447Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVH1L2PpuDf
