「Hi」不擅表達的我,很老套地放出這個字作開場白。781Please respect copyright.PENANAO1daKNEHGm
781Please respect copyright.PENANANsHTSB0txn
Susan:你中意女裝打扮?781Please respect copyright.PENANA2yaWhdkAVw
781Please respect copyright.PENANAy7eDPFCkyU
我思索了一會,然後答覆。781Please respect copyright.PENANAXqluBfWHG7
781Please respect copyright.PENANAh1KF5XrMC4
我:如果我話係呢?781Please respect copyright.PENANAcj6sKAbnPB
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Susan:冇問題呀。781Please respect copyright.PENANAFme2oZpISO
Susan:我都中意同人傾扮靚(笑喊781Please respect copyright.PENANA1QWXub1L0z
Susan:咁你中意男定女?781Please respect copyright.PENANAS0udHDMtZy
781Please respect copyright.PENANA6vBlQF0akW
我:我係直㗎(笑喊781Please respect copyright.PENANAzDMjGwgdhk
781Please respect copyright.PENANA1hPWSNGING
Susan:咁你有冇女朋友?781Please respect copyright.PENANAIMeIjWBoue
781Please respect copyright.PENANArWajEX4kLR
我:有嘅話就唔洗上嚟玩app啦(笑喊781Please respect copyright.PENANAj4M3UEkdsb
781Please respect copyright.PENANAR2idzAZfrc
Susan是我第一個真正在app上長期聊天的女孩子。781Please respect copyright.PENANAN2geH3Qqk6
781Please respect copyright.PENANAKKShPSoDeO
她,剛也是跟我一樣23歲。這不禁讓我想起我和女裝的情緣,還有當年陪伴我成長的女性同輩,因為我依稀記得,我愛上穿女裝是跟我小時候的經歷有關。781Please respect copyright.PENANAV1KICpjxFe
781Please respect copyright.PENANAqXRzV5WgZf
我記得自己在很小的時候,身邊的女性頗多的。781Please respect copyright.PENANAxiAZLHC0YQ
781Please respect copyright.PENANAezMMjATLtO
「呢套裙好靚呀,試下俾Andy仔著下睇下啱唔啱。」有一次,兩個表姐來我家玩,舅媽(表姐的母親)提出。781Please respect copyright.PENANAdqA0PpWrqf
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那一刻的我,有點不情願,但是經過這次的被迫,態度就180度轉變。781Please respect copyright.PENANAZnV2F2GH0j
781Please respect copyright.PENANAYIUGPcHwQ0
再說,小朋友就是喜歡模仿別人的動作,例如乘車時,我會模仿巴士司機的動作、電影裡的特工拿槍殺人做英雄,我也拿起玩具槍想像自己也是英雄;所以我的生活裡,也曾模仿女性穿裙子。781Please respect copyright.PENANAo1a0CZ2wjY
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只不過,長大後一來心理上不再模仿成年人,再加上出於社會的傳統目光;所以我把「偽娘」這個靈魂封印著,直至近年我接觸上cosplay,又把它解放出來。781Please respect copyright.PENANAEp76KYmxMU
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在我7歲之前,常接觸的同輩的女性還是頗多的,除了兩個表姐外,還有兩個女生。781Please respect copyright.PENANAUu3b9w5Ot8
781Please respect copyright.PENANApW0rSNc9e1
在讀幼稚園的最後那年,我和她的相處,不是她來我家,就是我到她家,痛快地玩著捉迷藏、猜拳之類的遊戲;可是自從升上小學之後,便各散東西,沒再來往,就像現在中學畢業之後也沒有再跟同學來往一樣。781Please respect copyright.PENANA9K5pUHXPVY
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而另一個女生,則是在小學一年級時認識的同班同學,幾乎每天大家的距離相差只有一張檯這麼遠,她還成為科長,在每個上課天都收集功課。學校旅行時,更是同一組的人。781Please respect copyright.PENANAS3lCT13vSa
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儘管升小二時,我們又被安排在同一班別;然而,命運卻不允許我們在一起,她正在這時候說:「我快要搬家了,以後不能再見面了。」就這樣,又分道揚鑣。781Please respect copyright.PENANABw4KWjv9lM
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當年跟我同年紀的幼稚園同學,現在都23了,不如現在如何呢?當年在小一時跟我同班別的詩婷,現在又過得如何呢?失聯太久,都找不到了。781Please respect copyright.PENANAgqNGPm3LO5
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Susan:想知你啲假髮點keep?781Please respect copyright.PENANA1t48d57peZ
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我:我用幾次就扔㗎啦,淘寶買返嚟嘅平野粗用就算啦(笑喊781Please respect copyright.PENANA6a9e1Gbd2W
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Susan:明嘅(笑喊781Please respect copyright.PENANAGK5aSgVpRO
Susan:我都買過,好易打結781Please respect copyright.PENANA4RJFNJMTZB
781Please respect copyright.PENANASOApcptp7j
我:同埋,我屋企有阿媽喺度,女裝衫唔擺得屋企,我咪擺迷你倉,咁咪少打理囉。781Please respect copyright.PENANAviz6aOpWk8
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Susan:女裝嘅事,最緊要有女朋友支持(笑喊781Please respect copyright.PENANAmcUFv1oYRF
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這一點,真的非常真,珍珠也沒有那麼「真」。781Please respect copyright.PENANA3dcvaBVsIk
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偶然我會看到有些同樣愛女裝的男人在煩惱:如何讓自己的老婆/女朋友接受自己的偽娘身份?781Please respect copyright.PENANAKc3FSnnQvY
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這時候我都一律建議:你不是應該在交往前就要表明清楚嗎?只有在對方接受的前提下,在開始交往,而不是到了交往後才再想辦法!781Please respect copyright.PENANAjUC7yRIK6Y
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所以,我在Tinder上亦然,上載自己的女裝照,除了是分享生活,同時亦兼具「過濾功能」。781Please respect copyright.PENANAKTANgVcs0y
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相信那些真的不喜歡偽娘的女生,都不會右滑進來跟我match了,這樣也使自己避免把時間浪費在這些與自己不合適的女生身上。781Please respect copyright.PENANAzpZng4XIpx
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也許有人會質疑我:沒有多少女生會喜歡偽娘。781Please respect copyright.PENANAanO5jBUM7p
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但是我對這點疑慮是絕對可以放心!因為我相信在2021年的香港,基本上年輕一輩的人都對「偽娘」有較大的接受度;何況一般情況,如果它只是一種興趣,而不影響本身喜歡女孩子的傾向,和自己性別認同的話,那我可以抱著十萬個放心,總會找到女朋友。781Please respect copyright.PENANA8zECgXhAdB