I can't fucking stand narcissists. Just something about the way that they constantly gush about themselves and how great they are pisses me off to no end.
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But when that narcissist happens to be paying you a shit load of money to take pictures of his pouting face from various angles, it is best to keep your discontent to yourself.
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Mr Montgomery looks of to the side, and pushes out his lips yet again in a comical pose. I have to bite my tongue against telling him that the duck face doesn't suit him.
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When I'm finally through with the grueling task of having to photograph this man for three hours, while he talks my ear off about his achievements in the business world at every chance he gets, how he's the "best businesses man in Jamaica", and "came from nothing", and "works tirelessly, day and night", even showing me his certificates of achievement, when I asked him absolutely nothing about any of this shit, I turn to him and hand him the memory card.
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"Here. This has your pictures on it."
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"Thanks, hon."
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I smile at him, then leave as hastily as I possibly can, without arousing suspicion.
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"Fucking assclown," I say as soon as my ass lands on the seat of the car. I lay my camera bag down on the seat beside me and start the ignition, when I feel my phone vibrating in my back pocket.
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"What now?" I groan. It seems as if I can never get a break.
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When I see the name of the person on the phone, I almost groan in frustration.
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"Yes, Marcus," I say as calmly as I can when I answer the phone, but it still comes out as a growl. This bastard better have a good reason for calling me right now.
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"Hello, Leah. A pleasant good morning to you, too."
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I breathe in a deep breath, hold it for a few seconds, and then let it out.
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"What do you want, Marcus? The man you just set me up with was a narcissistic asshole."
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"Mr Montgomery? I know. Been married three times. All three wives left him. Couldn't stand the bastard. Anyway, I'm calling to tell you that the exhibition has been cancelled."
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"WHAT?"
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"The owners of the gallery that we were gonna have it in pulled out at the last second. Said that photography isn't real art. I'm sorry."
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I'm livid. And heartbroken. Not many things matter to me... but this is my passion.
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"I... I can't cancel it now. I've worked too hard... Please. We have to find somewhere else." I can feel my throat constricting, my eyes welling up with tears. I never cry.
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"I was hoping you wouldn't say that," he says with a sigh.
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"What? Why?"
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"Because there's only one place big enough that I can think of that will let us host your showing on such short notice."
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"Where?" I ask desperately.
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I here silence on the other end, and worry that the line might have cut off.
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"Marcus?"
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He lets out a deep breath, and says in a voice that sounds constipated:
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"Montgomery's residence."
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***
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This is probably the most painful thing that I have ever agreed to in my life. Fifteen minutes into my showing, and I am beginning to regret my decision to use Montgomery's house as a makeshift gallery. He's going to fucking destroy my reputation as a photographer; he's scaring everyone away. He currently has his Doctorate in Business in his hands, showing it to a man who is smiling tightly while slowly backing away.
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I want to cry.
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I gulp the Moscato in my hand, trying to calm my nerves, and not attack and kill the man who let me have my showing in his house for free.
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Montgomery then walks over to a wealthy looking man in a tuxedo beside me, who has been looking at my most expensive piece — a photograph of a naked woman on her side, on a rocky beach, in black and white, with her head turned for a profile view of her face, and a head of kinky, afrocentric hair; the photograph isn't erotic at all. It's natural— since he walked into the room at the beginning of the showing.
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I'm screwed.
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But as soon as Montgomery opens his mouth to the man, the man cuts him off.
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"I'm not interested."
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Fuck.
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That's so savage.
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"Excuse me?" Montgomery splutters.
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"I came here to look at this woman's art, not to listen to you stroke your ego," he says, gesturing to me.
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The man still hasn't looked directly at Montgomery, making the exchange all the more degrading.
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"You — Leave! Now!" Montgomery exclaims, leaving me speechless. He's kicking someone out of my showing? Still, it's his house, so I can't say shit.
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The man just smirks — still looking at the painting.
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"Sure. But I'm buying this first."
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***
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That was one of two photographs that I sold tonight. Since Mr Rochester — for that is what he revealed that his name was — got kicked out by Mr Shithead twenty minutes into the showing, he agreed to let it stay until the end, and have me drop it off at his house; I'd just have to call him an hour in advance. We exchanged both numbers and addresses, and his parting words were "see you soon, Ms Anderson."
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He seems so... intimidating, so dominant and in control, someone else I'd have problems with if stuck with for too long. I like control, and I have serious issues with anything or anyone who threatens it.
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So now, I have another client with whom I will probably have issues with.
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At least I know that if I can survive Montgomery, I can survive anyone.
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