I'm crying, of course I am. Hearing the first patter of the heartbeat and watching Jays captivated expression.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡziUM6nuKlf
"It's around 170 bpm which is totally fine for this stage." Dr forester explains.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HzFy3qRKp
He smiles at us both.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvxE2uIt4T
"I'm very happy for the both of you" he chuckles.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQXeTi17yCr
"Wow" Jay says looking at the small foetus on the screen.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkx2mhaBTM
He turns to me and his eyes are prickling, tears forming. I smile at him and he hugs me gently. Dr Forester packs away the monitor giving us our moment.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJaLpS2h4I
"I'm going to book you in for 6 weeks, but any question or concern do not hesitate to come by. In 6 weeks time we can reveal the gender, have a think whether you would like to know or if you want to keep it a surprise" he explains.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMsRAquIlRm
"Taylor are you feeling well" he asks me routinely.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhXghJsq1yI
"Yes" I smile breathless.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6GAlnGcyw
"Perfect" he smiles back. He types some notes into the computer and then stands.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tNPRzjTka
"Thank you" Jay smiles at him.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFEtSGEzeUM
"Anytime Jay" he smiles
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0W8l3P6Gc6
"And no more scraps" he laughs looking at Jays head and the stitches.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzp4eg96cI
"Didn't think I would notice huh!?" He laughs with Jay.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7HrHZ1ilXk
"Keep those stitches in and don't touch them" Dr forester explains.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsefY2FiMqI
We've printed off several copies at reception of the scan. Angela gushes over them, and we smile along with her before leaving.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpu09GJW2aL
Once we're out Jay hails a cab and we head home together finally.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJa0SajQJsF
"I'm ready now" I say to him looking over at him in the cab.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopeR3AxWhN
"I'm ready to tell more people about the baby. Really I've wanted to tell Rach for a while now. And I needed to hear the heartbeat, I needed that Jay" I say smiling at him.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1giMyX6xZ6
"Of course" he smiles.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjhnK82lhFt
"I think it would be nice to tell them all together. I know that Matty and Ross know but we should do it with all of them." I smile.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLo61Ggur02
"Maybe we could invite them over for dinner" he says
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5K8teZPHc
"Another bbq maybe" he adds.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMx9E2uYd8Q
"Yes that would be perfect" I say resting my head into his chest.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJCm0zIghij
"Next weekend" I smile.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtje7MqGzf
He strokes my arms with his fingertips. I gaze out of the window, watching the world go by. Before I know it we're at our gates.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlGYMYYm5Wr
"Thanks man" Jay says tipping the driver.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivcwZsVt4Z
It's the first time we've strolled up to our home. We've always driven. It's oddly relaxing the second you step inside of the gated grounds.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmoiXJUq4V
"I feel safe here" I say to him, after the break in we had before at the lake house, safety and security is big on my list as well as Jays. All of the far reaching grounds are gated. It's integral to this place being secure, yet it doesn't feel like imprisonment. And it doesn't spoil the natural beauty of the landscape.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqEZlQhyubV
He strokes my hand in his. Listening to the birds and taking in the different trees we have. I wonder for a minute, about planting more. Perhaps we could plant a tree for the baby and watch it grow, a willow tree.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUXud9hwc2N
"We could plant a tree for the baby" I say softly.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxDmzpat4e
"Willow tree" I smile.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjRBPixhvH
"Ohhh willow I love that as a name" he smiles at me.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJcCyVfwyH
"It's beautiful" I say in awe.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDP7072mgZ
He smiles broadly at me. We reach my favourite part of the walk up to our place, where the single path is lined with beautiful trees, symmetrical on both sides. Blossoms decorate them and I smile looking up at Jay.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomRPBJ2fU2
"Willow Gilbert Scott" he tests out looking at me.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAQ6PXJueq
"A gorgeous little girl, with flowing hair and blue eyes" he smiles.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPnnYIJ4GR
I hold him a little tighter. It's quite a walk to our home. It's set far back, surrounded in each direction with nature. That's one reason why the views are perfect from our windows.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFa3TLperF
"I've been thinking about uni" I say to him.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUEPjN8TfR
"When I have the baby I want to stay at home" I say.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYvvXIQCRC
He nods, listening. We walk out of the blossom trees, we're getting closer to the fountain and circular driveway which appears at the end of this lane.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXj2isAB411
"I can study part time. I'll have one year left to finish and I'm sure I can do it on a reduced timetable" I smile.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnnZrBhAqLc
"I'll be finished this year Taylor" he says.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaACWoeO7dc
"Graduated, done check" he says.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aCzlQmvgU
"Graduate Jay, you're amazing" I say softly.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgaoJB4RxM
"I want my qualifications. But I want a family life too" I say looking ahead.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIzxq5B9yb
"We can make that work. My mum already mentioned nannying the baby" he explains.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzyhrUrQXe
"Really" I almost cry at the thoughtfulness of it.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPGCO4HqkX
"That was my one worry, having the baby stay with somebody I don't know. So I would be over the moon if she were to look after the baby when I have a lecture" I say softly.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9lK3QWrQS
"My mum" he begins and his voice breaks.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBAs0Zf0FHO
"Desperately wanted another baby. A sibling for me. She asked to help; she will absolutely treasure our baby" he says.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7xwagBMib
I stroke his hand in mine, with my thumb.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8zQN5Gr3G
We walk around the fountain and up past my mini. the 4x4 and Jays Audi. Jay also has several bikes in the garage, a Harley Davidson among them.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt7oOomRZ5C
We enter our home and I take a deep breath. Relaxing at last.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjXMFCDp8mI
"Jay I'm cooking" I smile at him.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFkXOaKUaTX
He begins protesting, but I literally swat at him.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFlNJZvhK4j
"You have cuts in your head. You are going to have a lovely shower get your comfy clothes on and relax by the fire." I say.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ444fMG34y
"You are the most wonderful fiancée" he smiles.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbt3A1eNYTT
"Roast beef okay?" I ask and he smiles.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHCaEFvHmh
"Wonderful" he smiles, kissing my lips softly.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfIWlBY7I3z
I usher him up the stairs and walk into my state of the art kitchen. I look around, the double hob and the marble walls and floor. I feel like pinching myself, unbelieving that this is my kitchen. This is my home, I think looking out of the bi-folding doors at the patio and the pool below.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsAbmoHgPSN
I put on the flatscreen and turn it onto the radio.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKxbI0eA2B
"Something tells me I'm going to spending a lot of time in this kitchen cooking up food" I whisper to bump.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrK4OhFdEBK
I rub my tummy briefly and begin prepping the roast beef joint. Jay seriously upped his game on grocery shopping, when we were staying at the apartment for the first time he had bottles of beer and leftover pizza in his fridge.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj25xyTvSiB
However now; we have beef joints, gammon joints, all types of vegetables and fruit. He's picked up on over time, the things I use in my cooking and just added them into the shopping. We have a huge spice rack, plants of basil and rosemary. A fully stocked larder and pantry room, where we keep all of the other bits we need. I love just stepping into the larder, it's a whole room in itself. I imagine all of the things I'm going to bake with our children.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvLHmrEPIA
Once the meat is in the double oven I set the timer and insert the thermometer in it. I focus now on the roast potatoes and roast vegetables.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ44cupQ0fp0
I've always had great cooking skills. I believe if you love doing something, it comes naturally to you and you're just good at it.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9hQqEqXWh
Once all the vegetables are on, I make a stock for the gravy. I'm planning on making him the best roast of his life, he's perfection and he literally just saved me from being bottled in the head.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1PgCcQvLr
Finally I take a seat waiting for everything to do its thing. Until I need to carve, mash and plate up. I unlock my phone for the first time today. Messages upon messages. It’s kind of a given that Ross will have messaged me, I also have messages from Jacob, Rachel and Joshua.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wIw6feq5h
I start with Rachel’s. She’s asked after Jay, wished me well and asked if there’s anything she can do. I reply instantly apologising for my late reply. I explain that we’re home now and thank her for being the bestest friend. I tell her I’ll see her at uni.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJw1SK8dSe
Now to deal with Joshua Morelli. He’s sent a few messages explaining how he’s contacted the police. He has wished Jay well and profusely apologised for it happening to us at one of his parties. Fair enough, I think and reply updating him on Jay. I explain he doesn’t have to be sorry, it’s not his fault. And move on to the next messages.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5YtIz7e0FX
Jacob has asked if we can practise twice next week to make up for not choreographing for so long. I suggest Tuesday and Thursday. I’m going to invite him to the BBQ too. I feel he needs to know about my pregnancy. For so many reasons, firstly my abilities may change a little as I get more heavily pregnant. And secondly to further friend zone him. Jacob is the kind of guy that if you so much as mention the p word to him, he will practically run away squealing.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIaDBpJPGk
Ross. He hasn’t over messaged me this time, just two texts. First one is short.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡujtJVbQiIG
Hope J is okay xxxx
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJl33NfBl1B
Sent around an hour after he left earlier. He does genuinely care about Jay, they’ve been friends for some time. Not quite as long as Matty and Jay but several years.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgu0ISkRQs
Second message is a bit longer.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoVyI1w83no
I want to hug you right now, my arms around you and your chin in my chest. Matty is in his room, being Matty and drawing shit. I’m just sitting here wondering how it would be to have you here, laying by my side. Me kissing you every so often. R xxxx
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpG0IskSd2
He’s sweet. Not even one mention of sex. It’s one of the things I appreciate about him. He never goes on about having sex with anybody, yet in bed he is phenomenal. I consider messaging back and decide I need to.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3XrrshMK08
Jay is okay, we’re home. That’s not fair you know that I love your hugs. Tay xxx
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphk5vQ6bwc
I send it off and put my phone down heading into the larder for the ingredients I need to make Yorkshire puddings. I’m home baking them and Jay is going to be impressed.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSNAzjl1KH
After I’ve made them up and set them in the oven I stack the dishwasher and clean the sides down. I check on the stock and add in some of the juices from the beef.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kmjeOv5be
I rub my tummy, willow I think to myself. It’s a very fitting name. I’m growing to the idea of having a little girl, where I can tie her hair up and put her in little dresses. I get lost in imagining what she might look like with a dad like Jay and his beauty. Will she take his icy blue eyes and my brown hair. Or will she be blonde just like her daddy. In the most bizarre way I almost wish I was having twins, a boy and a girl. A boy that looks like a mini Jay. Theo, Ezra or Rowan we would call him. With thick curly hair and my eyes.
79Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hafSeE3Zz
I sigh daydreaming and pull the meat out of the oven, checking the thermometer and seeing that it’s ready to be carved.
ns18.221.142.39da2
