Ben826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ431jnpW8wT
826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡETxBVH0T9M
February 14, 2005
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Same day
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I see her across the room. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2QhZ5LZbE
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Of course I see her.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDq2YOQXl76
I always see her.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCQ80sccZq
And she's just as fucking beautiful as always. Maybe even more so.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1KNGcgI7NS
Damn it.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiiNM52Vi1A
I need to stop looking at her. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKGYI16UUq
This is fucking Valentine's Day. The Holiday for desperate chicks, so why the fuck am I sitting here alone?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRmhUjja8Lt
You already know the answer to that, you fucking idiot. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKinCGJhzUy
Damn it.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZB31hha7w
I scan the room for the thousandth time. My gaze lands on her, like it always does. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSJ42AwltO
I want her so much, it physically hurts. I couldn't think about anyone else, even if I wanted to.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIl2D3uIj5
I don't want to. I want her, only her. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2WHo99dG9
But I fucked it up. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5M7ZiXxnZC
826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEp7F1zEDL
Of course I fucked it up.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVrKA2gYDaU
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Because I'm a fucking idiot.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8b6w8kPjnB
And now she really hates me. She's been avoiding me this whole time. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oiAkzI9y3
It feels like a fucking knife in my chest every time I see her and she's not near me.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1IyoOUrihv
I need to touch her soft skin. I want to kiss her sexy lips. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWs88QE3E42
Can lips be sexy?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4jKUxtI7r
I don't know, but hers are. Everything about her is perfect. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKMnrvZNqnN
I need her. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSwvE7LV3O
A blonde approaches me, Karen, I think. Fuck, I don't know. Who cares. She pushes her arms up in an attempt to display more of her tits and any other time, I would have been interested.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkiYiYoTJvA
It's feels like that was another life. Everything feels so different now.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cWw0uDz1q
"Hey Ben." She says my name like it's supposed to mean something, but I couldn't care less about what she wants.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1eSPP7ZmVa
Oh shit, I think I may have fooled around with her before. Maybe?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hpbfSgybw
"Hey, sorry, I gotta go. See you around." I stand quickly without a plan of where to go, but I figure I can hide from everyone in my room. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtpRE0iSDGv
Even her.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgAxe8rJyb
I close the door, locking everyone out and stumble to my bed in the dark. Shit, I drank too much trying to ignore the girl across the room. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbGjEmIoh9
I feel something strange as I lay down...826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7WoYAZTBq
I'm not alone. Fuck! Who the hell is in my bed?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa4rSkG8jMl
"Ben?" I hear her groggy voice and instantly relax. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOOW4MAdzd
"Kat? What the fuck? You scared the hell out of me!" Why is she in my bed? Was she sleeping?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQardnKLM3h
"What are you doing here?" Her confusion coming through her scratchy voice.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1VtUV2jLk
"What do you mean? In case you forgot, this is my room." I'm too amused to be irritated. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrWHV35KXn
"Oh." She seems to realize where she's at. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6FgtV4YX8o
"Oh." I chuckle. God, she's so fucking adorable.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMrbqnHhiu
"Sorry." I can hear the embarrassment in her voice and even though I can't see her in the dark, I know she's blushing. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPYOMOkgvm
She moves, in a hurry to get up and probably run away from the asshole that I am. I need to make her stop. I don't want her to leave.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEJSVlDNZs
"What are you doing in here, Kat?" I hope my question will be enough of a reason to stay at least a few minutes longer. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIKRwCetpyH
It's not. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5EANgLdDQ
She stands up quickly, just as a crash sounds through the room. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXrxT7uXpe
"Oh shit! Ben, I think I knocked something over." I can hear her scurry around, feeling for whatever it was.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXk0x4RYxn
I laugh. Nothing in my room is that important. "Don't worry about it, Kat."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYGuy3f8BCY
"Don't worry about it?!? I'm pretty sure there's broken glass down here!" She's frantically feeling around. She's going to get herself hurt.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERzrnKcdIN
"That's all the more reason to not feel around in the dark. Seriously, Kat. It's fine. Stop before you hurt yourself." I hear her sigh, but she stops her movement. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF3s31oFomP
"Now, tell me. What were you doing laying in my bed? Not that I'm complaining." Shit, that last part wasn't supposed to come out.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjaGs6Fku9o
I feel the bed sink next to me as she sits down. "I just needed to... get away."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zY6nxennT
"I know the feeling." I sigh. What I don't say is I was mostly trying to get away from her.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWbcOTsJspn
"You do? You know what it feels like for all you friends to be in happy relationships and worried about you and your sad pathetic life?" She lets out a huff. Damn. I was not expecting that.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBT2E8KQ26
"Uh... Yes?" She gives a humorless chuckle and I can just see her eyes rolling. "Well, I mean, I kinda do. Actually. I guess I just never thought about it like that before."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHhQ3v15Veq
"Oh." Well, that shut her up, which would usually be a good thing, but I'm not sure what the fuck to say.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBmOHfTXIS0
I decide to use this moment to beg for her forgiveness. "Listen, I just want to say, I am really sorry. For everything. I know you're not a fan of starting over, but do you think maybe you could forgive me?"826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWaksA86ZEv
She scoffs. "Oh please, like its that easy. You don't even mean that."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQGwgD4JBne
"I do too. More than anything. What can I do to make it up to you?" I would do just about anything she asks, I just hope she does forgive me.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdaoWf0F2TV
"Nothing. There's nothing... at... all... Wait! I have an idea." I can hear the smile in her voice. Oh shit, why do I feel so nervous?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbI3m6MpK5
She keeps talking, not waiting for my response. "Okay! Just hear me out before you say anything. Okay?"826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkv6GfMmu24
Again, I couldn't get a word in before she barrels on. "Okay. So, I think we should date."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgp6nUI5eyz
I can't stop the sound that erupts from my chest. It's somewhere between a laugh and a choking sound. I'm so in shock that my body has broken.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUcNhLpxUFG
"I-uh... You-what?" Words. What are words? 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFDNhZTOrWN
"Okay, before you shut me down." I wasn't going to. "It's not real. We can just pretend to date."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkkaEuo4Qi
"Why the fuck would we do that?" Okay, now I'm really confused.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzkdI1RTBDS
"Because I really need this. And you said anything!" She throws my words back in my face.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡptfP4s5DJG
I groan and rub my hands down my face. What the fuck did I just get myself in to? 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfPoFBtyo4
"Okay, okay. Just give me a minute... to... to..." To what? What the fuck is there to think about? I can't say no. "Just give me a minute to process... all of this."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCzJbZC7BjJ
"Sure, take your time." I feel her shift on the bed as she lays down. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlcy5qiZthx
"Make yourself at home." I half joke, because I honestly don't mind her laying in my bed.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCIyMWnHzB
She just giggles, stretching out to get comfortable. Damn. I really missed that sound. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnGlRKXmMl
I missed everything about her.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05SJWtkXxB
I'm going to have to do this. Pretend to be with the girl that I can't stop thinking about. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSPwfaAFRKs
Shouldn't be too hard to fake feelings, it's the keeping them fake part that's going to be a struggle. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUa5ALHugLt
"Why exactly do you need this?" I have a right to know why we are doing this, don't l?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgwxBABpefo
She sighs. "Does it really matter?" 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuY1sUDIXfR
"Before I agree to your crazy scheme, I need to know why we are doing it in the first place." Why can't it just be real? Of course, I don't say that out loud because I'm a huge pussy.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM3Poyz2iMS
"Okay, fair enough. Everyone has been treating me like I'm fragile since the whole... you know... happened." I lay down next to her on my back.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCeQV57jG4s
"The whole you know?" I'm completely confused. What the fuck is she talking about? 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYGmkGlDgz
"You know... New Year's Eve?" She sounds embarrassed, but I still don't understand.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmsCjTSNiHk
"Why would they treat you differently because of that?" Maybe I'm missing something?826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzriaiWGG19
"Uh... because of... what happened... with you." Shit. This is all because of me? 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNpSx1ULUG
"Oh... I didn't... I didn't know." I can't believe she has been struggling and it's all my fault.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2iUpkpkeKb
"So uhm... Yeah... They act like I'm going to break, so I'm sick of being pitied and worried about and I just want to be normal... And you can help with that. Two birds, one stone. You know?"826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOXA3kk5Xl9
"Uh, am I the birds or the stones here?" I chuckle. She's so weird sometimes. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlroph1toq0
She laughs. "Well, I guess the stone."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCUQVRb97hE
"Okay, so what are the birds?" I'm barely able to hold my laughter in to get the sentence out.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfDsk5POfE
"Wait. No. That's wrong. You're a bird!" She sounds excited, like she's made a huge discovery or something.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVPDxwwZij
"So... I'm a bird now?" Seriously... She is the most adorable person I know.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYBnNc9GOXv
"Okay, everyone is worried about me because they think you broke my heart or whatever. So, bird one is you. And everyone pities me because I'm single. So, being a pathetic loser is bird two."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwFzARQiyJv
I turn on my side to face her. "You are not a pathetic loser." Completely ignoring the fact she said I broke her heart.826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSNeUAvmWSy
"I most certainly am. That's why I need this. If I can just throw the stone of our fake relationship at the birds, everything will be okay." Exhaustion fills her voice as she turns to face me. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZ44Bx00w5
I can't help but notice we are only inches apart. I can feel her breath on my face. If I leaned forward a fraction of an inch, our noses would be touching. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3G9XqL4Yu
Shit. This is bad. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9J4jfjxKKY
Faking it is going to be so hard. 826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjNalm0M8G
"So... What do you say, Little Birdie? You in?" Her laugh echoing into the core of my being, reverberating and filling my chest.
I find her hand and pull it to my face, placing a kiss on it. "Let's throw that rock."826Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVf7Ry7NWM
I am so fucked.
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