同學們面面相覷。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZadLZMFnW
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEThaX6x2C

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGILWSfRlYc
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0eYUhgKpdf

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Sjn0pmHk5
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeoAppms7sE

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNPmIdbpMb
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaRBMNM5JbU

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPEiAy0PcX
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7JbGNaDaT

「那改成老不羞好了。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpfz9gKFwK
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEnFRTRRCz2

「更糟糕了啊！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM7aQmcp7uF
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa4FpoVRKw1

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAO13iEkaHK
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvXNtnj3rt

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHY6AJuzES
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXrUGYJBzF

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1cqyBAosW
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAAkRvGT0d

「老師，它正在暖身。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoEG7k3CBH
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIKK8pxVEF

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEpg5AVPZi
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qu6u802XC

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0rmkRJ4RZ
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgcmNOjKWda

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRpXaw2kxm
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNShggIsE1

「那我改姓三岐。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXXyCgKRjRv
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHcRM81YlA

「才不是這個意思！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyG5bUa17Xn
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYF6DGWQnMc

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy5nGKikFls
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxzsHyXUete

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0YE9xEUEy
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTsG87DXLbX

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ivDcv39Af
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRBfhxPQ1vJ

「元帥好弱。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdPXbyJPKr
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUcf2a9vYN

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksvLxuCaXc
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbY6vHLBl35

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxqBEGs5DvG
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvy0H5vaSm

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnxBWKAwS21
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLZWITNOLo

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOU1wLrzUu
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1XUZuxd6E
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yrl3DRUPO

「老師！別中計啊！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJ0l7DmFiI
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOq9KY5fMxT

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEzkvOpEf5
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTiwEraaOs2

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9TEuCDysn0
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBrjhn4QOm

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKQfMIgruQ
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvYnlxR5ro

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDaqLfMUb5
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Xh3osmZDh

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFXoWGHrGH
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKQDA1wR5ny

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ49yzXrx2DS
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvTHD0WGIfX

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEbrbrL3QPH
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1tHzP0W09

「什──」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtt65dHGjY9
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67wpP4LDD4

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySkgX1Fnr7
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc1W0QHtqAz

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvlTt62HK4T
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxaFdLjYQy

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2gQJIPmMF
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUWILAnSLm6

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq1y4lRUMzu
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1abmAYXwNh

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbcPS8hqV6
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30dhRc5E6h

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj3FDyUsSIH
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRrVCrAe2E

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0jmxWWgy3h
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuFg6eateMY

    賴妍歪頭。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi2QqExlaB7
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECYJXKXYKi

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJHUW0xbZ9
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7wnWdjZ9tv

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnMai0ky4k
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuc9senaFkX

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYuNxh4OAPU
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiIe4o7m1JJ

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIPBco5CKA
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwz1EuH8F6l

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2UjxcnYMY
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfhkudwBGmn

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRuDHc4VZXA
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSLJJoXysqr

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuHKcRoKLR
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ352siCYXUb

「一加一等於二。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNly8P8oU6n
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BBRymIX5o

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQ89EkBSjY
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡef74EuJ8Gw

「……咦？」老師愣住了。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv7oYwtcDQ8
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZqR3iaQ8E

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJ6E9muYKb
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TGLu2LD2v

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1h1po13jD5
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUBgqbK2RRF

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgh33SPh7S
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm01HKUm1jt

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGEO0xyQIB
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJy7RzGv32p

    完蛋了。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAkmH4Wqlc
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFFD0QPVwGn

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuOuTODjg58
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Ewu6Z6NX3

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLr3WoHuxp1
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfEEHMe6UA

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmr66dPIy6R
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8omiO8gvbG

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2mHpHMVA4
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiRY76L5VB0

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Mth1BMnCF
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyflbaPo1dT

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6fOI4x9pq
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3h2Z37map

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbt3nSQCRAZ
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CE1ivadMz

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzmbJM2JCM
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdjPVqNFw1

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiP9xEEhPnD
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSZwPxBHkz

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPdkE8pMzD
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOEvPD8AXOK

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0yFTQPrbD
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUqn8KE0PQU

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrGxZQYgIb

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GWpZ8kWDc
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡubIZycwQlD

「同學！一加一等於多少！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXj7io71hWO
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUJEJdk0SI

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1xM3zI5uS4
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZK5POJ9IMQ

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJRyJa78fxw
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIfEJuFkxVj

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBrbsVzCyd
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDFgKO4yHI

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe6yqW6oez3
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxtIfPybR0u

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSR8OTNLy9q
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwix5nlDcB5

    全班盯著三岐。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oRkMJmJzk
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUsrIER5zW

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUhI78OyK9
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgTkHOOTl6

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCr4g6TpqFB
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeNGgAt3Uu4

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTmzJOIc0m
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXJgkb0T1zX

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyw6ilMSxM5
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0BsQ4kEvRE
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDax2WIKxU

當日結果：262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBaGmiDmb4
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGheDrIz85

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEWfckxuRW
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3IG7dV1qU0

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMaRL0LQBjK
262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRpFXjKiTZ

    柳困依然單身。262Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIjmQbAEQ8B