《請跟我交往！拜託啦！》 - 第一章體育課！

大家好，我叫柳困，今年十七歲，是一個看似普通的正常高中生。

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不過，我卻擁有一個不尋常的秘密──我仍然保有前世的記憶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGnic98iiQ
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不對，不只前世……就連前前世、前前前世、前前前前世都還記憶猶新。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rySPL331R
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問我為什麼？407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYjIH9tfK8
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原因很簡單。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLi9VgplvLw
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因為我是個單身狗。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OiqUHsKrN
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在死後的世界，也就是「魂界」，神曾經立下一個規定：要談過戀愛，才能在轉生前消除前世的記憶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbVpiJwtWmJ
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「沒談過戀愛怎麼能算是活過啊？」那一天，神斜坐在王座上，興高采烈地宣布，「從今天開始，到死前還沒談過戀愛的，一律不准清除自己的記憶！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnQRhBrxWM
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從那之後，世間開始不時出現保留著前世記憶的神童，他們也都成功地在重生後談了場轟轟烈烈的戀愛，並在死後轉生前順利清除了自己的記憶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFfDPd7mKR
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除了我以外。

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「喂，我說你啊，」在再次轉生到人間，成為柳困之前，神把我拉到魂界的角落，用責備但幸災樂禍的語氣對我說，「你要加油欸，你已經連續單身了十輩子了，學弟妹全都畢業了，就只剩你一個人還卡在這裡，不覺得羞恥嗎？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHHDFZDHzT
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「少囉唆！」我惱怒道，「妳也不想想到底是誰的問題！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszraDZRi1h
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「哎呀哎呀，現在是怪我囉？」神擺出無辜的表情。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHhPlvX7wW
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「這輩子！我這輩子一定會脫單的！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYvNfGKvnF
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「你上次也是這麼說。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaPWJes8Kpb
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「閉嘴！才沒有！」我面紅耳赤，不等祂說完就直接跳進轉生之門。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3E9BHzoWQm
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvYzyrjgUB

在那之後的十六年後，我進入高中，開始體驗人生中的第十一次青春期。我準備好要應付戀愛這場激烈的戰爭，也希望自己能在這一次的青春期成功脫魯。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SlsabT02O
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這個想法，只持續到進入教室的那一刻，遇見「她」為止。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt55ADRbKHH
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「柳困！該起床了啊！」一陣衝擊襲向趴在桌上的我，我一個重心不穩隨著椅子整個人倒在教室冰涼的地板上。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvoxVz23wk
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「妳搞什麼啊！」我抱怨，起身拍掉制服上沾到的灰塵，「現在不是還在午休時間嗎？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ498fKi8gza
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「才不是，這節是外堂課欸。」說話的是一位臉頰微微泛紅的女學生。她的右腳舉著，明顯就是剛把我踹下椅子的樣子。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV09vHQdTG
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我默默的翻白眼，但是沒有回嘴，避免招來一頓拳頭。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ49urqtagYp
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我轉頭看了看四周，同學們都走光了，只剩下空蕩的桌椅。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1ILhGd8PV
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「走囉，體育課。」女學生紅著臉帶頭走出教室，我則跟在她後面。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCohKF5vKVM
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0PESHwKs6k

什麼？你說她看起來就像是對我有意思，問我為什麼不跟她交往就好了？407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJWRGgj45j
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我們再次回到剛剛的話題。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcRMa0f0UQ
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在高一時，我遇見了「她」。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksL7VD8YOI
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她有著一頭紫色的長直髮，看到人總是臉頰泛紅，一副害羞的表情，還擁有一個美麗的名字：賴妍。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSueemyZUH
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剛開始，全班的男學生都急著對賴妍獻殷勤，不過到了下學期的時候對她告白的人卻只剩下其他班的學生。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnVASMIJpH
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原因很單純：因為這個人很恐怖。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDEnyucyzG
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恐怖到甚至被取了「瘋狗」這個外號。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95PSzX21Vw
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRPlzCI1cl

至於一天到晚臉頰泛紅的原因也不是因為「為了要操控他人」這種複雜的理由，而是因為「酒精」。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdNOLvuxxQq
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehrWTHLLN2

賴妍是我在到目前為止的十一個人生裡面，見過唯一一個可以在午餐時間拿整瓶五十度烈酒配完白飯的女人。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRxfw3Md8Z
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHJaerTPT2

永遠沒人知道她喝醉之後下一件會做出什麼超乎常理的事。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDkp0se9vYz
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOjTCWNiV5

我們兩人快步走到操場，看見體育老師早就已經帶完操，放同學去打球了，所以我直接略過暖身，自己抓了一顆地上的籃球，走到籃球場練習投籃。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuf0uXpYygZ
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8l3ppcPLr

「同學！」我投進第三球時，體育老師吹起哨子，「請不要在操場喝小米酒！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cs1MZrK0T
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHJY2APkU9

我馬上轉頭，看見一旁換好體育服的賴妍把一隻腳放在長椅上，仰起頭抓著酒瓶猛灌。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQTUTniwP5

如果把背景換成公園，那她看起來就像一個普通的公園醉漢。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDv5C0RnJhQ
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但是這裡是學校啊！

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「可是老師，我在暖身欸。」賴妍把酒一口氣喝完然後發出「噗哈」的聲音，接著用手背豪氣的抹抹嘴，最後啐了一口痰在操場外的草皮上。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdpjqUaAUT
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這不是完全就是公園裡的醉漢嗎！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodL9LkNxVs
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVjUSswHRQ

「那邊那位同學！」體育老師又朝另一邊大喊，「請不要在體育課投擲燃燒瓶！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaFfXnWThfe
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7X0hZUkDa

「可是老師，我在暖身耶。」手裡握著燃燒瓶正準備要丟的男同學停下動作。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlcEO6FdnlX
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvjjGsINBMn

這貨的名字叫簡澄，不知為何，他對燃燒瓶有著近乎癡狂的異常執著，不論是何種問題、處境都會想使用燃燒瓶來解決。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV4hXSLEzYY
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對他來說，世界上不存在他的燃燒瓶解決不了的事物。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnKRLEQSoh
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有時候問題甚至還真的能夠解決，不過這只讓他變本加厲。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcF9zjOxeqF
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像是現在。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqj1Y5SVw1T
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你根本是在幫其他同學暖身吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlW0zOXYoTn
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrGupF0tpg

你旁邊的女同學已經快要哭出來了啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNeCUUIVw6
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ZCMArB9Mp

體育老師也快來阻止一下他吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3OHbIByLxN
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylRnwq4Vaj

「那暖身完記得收起來喔。」體育老師又繼續回頭看他的閣樓雜誌。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgG7GhZCHMH
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF5YiZErK5x

你這體育老師也太淡定了吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1WXYX4AvMI
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7FMvEWR4f

至少先給我把閣樓雜誌收起來啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQ3hsJxzqO
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzsqKsde5IN

在簡澄下手之前，另一位男同學抓住了他的手腕。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNWAH5KFGYa
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1l6a31UuX

「住手吧，簡澄boy，這樣不cool喔。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8K3tCbudy

男同學一手抓住簡澄，一手按在自己的臉上。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhD0fVbv4jT
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「可惡，最麻煩的傢伙出現了…」簡澄低聲抱怨。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IVBVC8rZI
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkiQgoHI0QM

「你的惡行，就由我冥界的魔之眷屬 · 暗爪的歐威爾，依你的行為施以制ㄘㄞ────」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGiXCNpwvRY
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「三岐，你的錢包掉了。」我走過去，撿起掉在暗爪的歐威爾身旁的錢包。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwjkKnx7YZE
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「……我不是三岐，我是鋼爪的歐威爾。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM27cdkzuvI
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「你剛剛說暗爪。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQ9jW3lQGw
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「不，柳困boy，我很清楚我是誰，」他一手放在胸前，一手放在身後，雙腳交叉向我行禮。

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「我，是冥界的邪王 · 鋼爪的麥歐爾，出自於冥界的望族，進入人間是為了要拯救我的妹妹，也就是冥界的公主，鎖鏈的康妮。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKEssmrSJH
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「你本來說歐威爾。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJB5LXwOdG0
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「那、那是一時口誤……」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrvXW6GIzq
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「你，」我嚴肅的對著他說，「根本不知道自己是誰對吧？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeBKr2Oyx6
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xOl7Bw5HH

「不…我不……」他按著額頭，露出痛苦的神色，在地上打滾。「不行……！『魂』…滾出我的腦海啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEt68w2QtH
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL6GyF0JDle

「邪王好弱。」我發牢騷。話說回來，魂界也沒有邪王這種東西就是了。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBCGK0NOfL
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「這個給你，振作起來吧，」簡澄把手中的燃燒瓶遞給他，為他加油打氣，「你可沒有這麼容易倒下！因為……407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Fhnw52YH6
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXwRXYRwrY

「因為你可是……我的宿敵啊。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOSVmhjrSRc
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簡澄露出了豪氣的笑容，把手伸向在地上的三岐。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKhAjozYYh
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三岐擦乾淚水，回握住簡澄的手，正準備從地上爬起的時候，「有沒有人～看到我的～瓶～～～～子～～～～～～～～～」被喝的爛醉的賴妍一腳踩在後腦。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FXgcPwWiZ
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「你不是說只要暖身嗎！」「被」趴在地上的三岐吐槽。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKUf57BAl5
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「喔呀…？」賴妍往下一看，「早安啊三岐同學～在那裡玩會弄髒身體喔？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrGelYyvYy
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLtA6Ut1Gr

「妳先從我身上下來啊！」三岐掙扎。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yYGMHarCa
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「喔喔喔喔！好像在玩衝浪喔！」賴妍努力維持平衡。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OyTkAZwfp
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpTJPFA34W

「妳這是……在噗喔小看我身為暗印者的力量嗎……？」三岐說到一半還吃到土。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1huqGdIob
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHah0iGIHc

「衝浪了喔喔喔喔喔！」賴妍開心的大笑。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq6L9B5ZlzR
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她根本就沒在聽啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡektc2J3PDY
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「同學！」體育老師從看雜誌的姿勢抬頭，

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「不要霸凌有精神障礙的同學好嗎！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxy3gZ7P7k
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbXvLN2Jqr

他只是中二病還沒好而已啊！為什麼變成精神障礙了！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXQAGshXzb3
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmYplz27NF

「可是老師你看三岐，」在賴妍腳下的三岐已經整張臉埋在土裡了，「他玩的很開心耶。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvZjq22Z4o
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiM9fu5nzbA

「唔唔唔唔唔唔唔唔！」三岐口齒不清的哀嚎。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpvTpclUIZ
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MMmm60DQr

「注意不要讓同學受傷喔。」體育老師繼續看閣樓雜誌。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxbEPuxVqK
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這已經不是受傷的問題了吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9UX8R8umAq
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ91xWGuRmtr

所以說給我把雜誌收起來啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGJPDE1J6d
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCw9VEX1fAA

「夠唔喔了吧！」臉不斷砸向地板的三岐好不容易擠出一句話。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4KWHZgrijS
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「…………」賴妍臉一僵，慢慢低頭，看著她腳底下不斷扭動的三岐。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYh6CAQEDdn
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「我、我的衝浪板會說話…好噁心喔……」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVIdZ18fYHO
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9w4yndZslM

她眼眶泛紅，吸了一次鼻子。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAw40r5lmU5
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兩次。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKP3KFISfv
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「嗚嗚………………」賴妍開始不顧一切地大哭。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjAnq6H1sY
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPMtauXuz1

「三岐同學真壞。」

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「好糟糕喔。」

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「竟然害奇怪的東西哭了。」旁邊圍觀的同學們開始交頭接耳。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbLTQNUnk9e
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說別人是奇怪的東西也太過份了吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDnoWDuaqE
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOKFMFtM6Z

「所以現在是我的問題囉！」三岐好不容易從嚎啕大哭的賴妍腳下逃開。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsMzlJo8dkA
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMZb6FJe9S

「喂！誰來安慰她一下啊！」一位男同學慌張的大喊。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvLlPdIaA5
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLSqd5ImjKP

「我能讓他冷靜一下。」簡澄拿出燃燒瓶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqw2PMh9sl
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡikFuz2oNem

「你只是要讓她熱起來吧！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQPKjVMqk2
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLZsqhEFuR

「被吾封印的眷屬呦，僅從吾之召喚───」三岐振振有詞。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8fDJ8AMXJ
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5XFQHZ5umB

「你是要安慰她還是收了她啊啊！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqnnMirnmMc
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpdvbmBrs0

「收了她。」三岐露出一副理所當然的表情。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZ95MWa0ww
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0tO5QbKUw

「你們根本是來亂的吧！」你們別亂搞，我等等還要收尾啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlGLyX9xBN
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMrQkxX6X4

「年輕人們。」不知道何時走到我們旁邊的體育老師開口了，「就憑你們是無法解決這種毀滅性天災的。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjzpdyKY6i
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rgW27NnGG

「為什麼又從奇怪的東西變成毀滅性天災！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7lGl1oIsD
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaBbaAcr0n

「因為奇怪的東西放久了本來就會變成毀滅性天災。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3LJoGOUzcH
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdWOBTlOKy

我不是在問這個啊啊啊啊啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5z8q7dnsl
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXnXLEpLwG

老師又開口說：「現在，我就讓你們看看，真正的『大人的辦法』。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuB3jEK0H7m
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡycAWI7i1kU

「『大人的辦法』……」簡澄看著老師嚴肅的臉，吞了口口水。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjxNvll1Vwd
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Jp4qfbOa8

「賴妍同學。」他走到賴妍面前。賴妍因為震驚而暫時忘記了哭泣。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNW7hnLlWV
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtbZ2ln3Pi

話說我們的體育老師是一位看上去年過四十的大叔，比班上所有除了我以外的同學都還要早經歷了傳說中的青春期，再加上已經在這所高中任職了十年以上，所以應該也有足夠的能力與經驗能解決這種事ㄑ────407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLtif2AdF97
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「你看，這是丁丁。」他脫下褲子。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡau31J2Teor
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    是真正意義上的『讓你們看看』啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxoi77Chog
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiwyLfXrO53
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  當日結果：407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuethArawQ5

賴妍平安無事（哭累了被女同學背回教室）。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPm4YheCSk3
簡澄打電話報警，體育老師於上課中被警察抓走，兩人前往警局做筆錄。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0nn91R9Aw
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三岐臉部異常腫脹，被帶去了醫務室。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfkIEJrSxly
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVPcTxDpt1

其他同學（包括柳困）於下一節正常上課。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqZAbEgcaR
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柳困依然單身。

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第一章 體育課！

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第一章體育課！