I put my palm against my chest and frowned lightly. The pain wasn’t strong, but it was there. My parents had arrived at the hospital soon after I’d called them. Alex told them everything he knew, as I overheard while they were talking outside the room.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7nvso2ojfP
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLhTST6IEK
Apparently I needed to stay in the hospital so they could monitor me; make sure that this wouldn’t end up with me having a heart attack or at least until my new doctor came back from her vacation. She was going to have the last call on when I would be going home.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZbgbxxyhU5
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfrGJPtkNR
A knock on the door made my parents and me turn towards the door. I managed to send Alex home to get some sleep just two hours ago so I didn’t expect anyone else.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BNnAgkMv7
I didn’t want to call Max because I felt embarrassed therefore I didn’t expect him to show up at the hospital.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3CieO6Ou5p
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqZv8sdH9z
I couldn’t see who it was but I saw my mom smiling and getting up from her seat. That’s when Max and Cleo came into view. I sighed and leaned back against my pillow. I would have to explain why all these was happening.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE3M43hg6Be
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGkicJzjsi
“We’re going to the cafeteria. Want me to bring you something?” my mom asked and pulled my oblivious looking dad from his hand.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvdLzsrPQs
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlHedRzfHm
“A juice,” I smiled “And a cake,” I said with a smug smile “Can I eat cake?” I frowned suddenly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtOGCx9BPep
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgFj3GKSGq
“I’ll ask,” she smiled and left. The twins smiled at my parents as they walked past them.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCrrXlT8Dtm
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgUHPijOvWk
“So?” Max looked at me and sat down at the foot of the bed. Cleo didn’t move.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjmjtRoug6
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXHXpJ3uRm
“What?” I asked, frowning; avoiding the subject.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB6BJFxUsyf
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzRuqSZzi4
“What’s going on? My mom didn’t say much,” he explained.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFRHNjFW4m
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqir1OHGig
“Well, I had chest pains and they thought it would be better for me to stay in,” I smiled uneasily. Max blinked and tried to speak again but failed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUU6xBLvhrm
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvCqvnVTHG
“Why?” Cleo spoke for the first time; her voice kind of startled me. I haven’t talked to her for so long and I missed her so bad. I stared at my hands, my sight blurring, and the machine started to pace up. I noticed the twins turning towards it.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87FeRxoGh4
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRwiH0juHg
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” I mumbled “Not yet at least.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUQ2vB8Hvq
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFsHJiZS1Sj
“When are you checking out?” Max asked another question.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdGs0XbUr1H
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuui93YkzQ6
“When my doctor comes back from her vacation,” I replied “Tomorrow I think,” I winced and Max frowned “Yeah, I know bad timing,” I chuckled. Cleo looked more relaxed after my small joke and a small smile formed on her lips.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaGcJh15KQ1
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcrOQFevLA
“I got you these,” she said and opened her bag, taking out three magazines. She moved closer and gave them to me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hcnRT8lfg
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLWOlzqWO5N
“Music too huh?” I grinned as I saw my favorite music magazine among the fashion magazines she preferred.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYi1fheRwfk
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmGJl2rrtxu
“Well, it’s not the time to be a bully,” she chuckled. I noticed Max gazing at the magazines, as if looking for something and then winced when it didn’t found it. I guess he was looking either for a car, a football player or a semi-naked woman. I smiled lightly and turned towards Cleo again.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnxsBod8rZk
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSgEgMlcvb2
“So,” I took a deep breath after a moment of silence “Tell me about the project,” I smiled at Cleo “What is it about?”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNbXggk78o3
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vyGTRUCNL
“Um,” she breathed “Need to have a portfolio of ten summer outfits and sew one of them,” she explained.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ11jxhU8Zsx
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAkXbTZzNVg
“Random summer outfits?” I asked while she sat down on the chair where my mom was seating earlier.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBNHsVICL6R
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpT49fCAZB6
“Sort of, I need to show a work outfit, a party outfit, a brunch blah blah, you get the picture,” she chuckled lightly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAQPuBxsTt
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlP7AB9fbjC
“How close to the end are you?” I made an effort to smirk.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKdONvBg0D
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5hvwVMaV8
“Surprising, she’s almost done,” Max mocked. I grinned at him and turned to Cleo again as she spoke.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmklGA7P8AN
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GOWI71Sto
“I’m actually drawing the last one but I can’t stop thinking about the previous I’ve done, so I’m gonna sew that one,” she said.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuCNY4BGQSJ
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1CrIK7FRY
“Cool,” I smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI7exuwZhpz
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL5fBNtieGT
I tried my best to ignore the fact that although she knew that Damien left, she only contacted me the first day. But as I couldn’t afford anymore drama these days, I turned to Max for a while, asking about Lexie. I understood that he didn’t want to say much maybe because he didn’t want to remind me Damien’s departure. Not that I have forgot about it at all.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiNSLF9Q2Ss
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRadlVPVINZ
Max had to go outside to answer his phone a little while later and that’s when Cleo came and sat at his spot.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdurPhw1PuS
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzU6Gl4niG7
“Um,” she begun and exhaled deeply “I’m really sorry that I haven’t contacted you since you came back or since you left actually,” she frowned. “I was mad at first because I didn’t want you to get hurt and then…” I swallowed hard figuring out for where this was going and I felt being dragged down under by a black hole. As my sight blurred I averted my eyes from her.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TrOLQMz8Y
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxO7DWLnQr
“Please don’t,” I interrupted “I’m not ready to talk about that yet,” I mumbled; my hands curling up into fists.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcCrYrfu7IM
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GBRJs9aHw
“Damn,” she breathed out as she studied me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8km7BzesyL
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtuJvz9kyDr
“Yeah, I know.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1fwV2zkmw
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[+++]494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2i3QeEjDYW
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Thankfully, the very next day the new doctor came by my room; a young woman of medium height and slim figure with curly blonde hair. I was suspicious that Alex had something to do with the fact that I was her first patient; especially since she was stunning. But then she informed me that she was a psychologist; she couldn’t have many patients actually staying in the hospital.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgosmhgHWp
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOtKyV6I0O
“Can you please leave us for a moment?” she asked my parents. As soon as we heard the door closing, the doctor sat on the foot of my bed. Popural spot.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4zp3Lo4Px
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoHHBwQ2nS
“As your pathologist may have told you, right now there’s nothing wrong with your body, it’ s just reacting to emotional pain,” she explained “So, we need to work on that,” she smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5NS6pRUzx4
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2roWU4NzDs
“Okay,” I nodded. “So, when I’m getting out of here?” I grinned. Mrs. Abbott chuckled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkosT4Cz1oo
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc31UreipfM
“I’ll come by in two hours, for a session and we’ll see,” she smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvfPoC8t3y
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaW20MD3pT
“But I’m fine,” I winced.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS86lYSyVqm
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasN49za3Ic
“We’ll talk about it later,” she smiled and nodded me for a goodbye.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONP1LpmnH3
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDYxn2K1EO
She must have informed my parents herself because they didn’t ask me anything when they returned to the room. They left soon afterwards, leaving me to read a book I asked from my mom. I would probably have to study for my exams but I didn’t felt ready and just the thought of it made me anxious.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHq78tRoeBE
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[+++]494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9OqUzbmlxi
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Samantha Abbott, my psychologist, was sitting on the chair across from me; a notebook on her lap. I was getting impatient. I wanted to go home and hide under the covers of my own bed. I felt oppressed in the hospital as I had to suppress every feeling I had; unless I wanted everyone to witness my weakness.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XiableBx0
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjJPzhAQJ4
“Is this really necessary?” I mumbled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsneYF0WUb
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZyJ34owMu
“How are you feeling today?” the blonde doctor asked me; ignoring my question.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazTwQ58Brj
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHdsWkCskWE
“Fine.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtGqDbrnLg
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRQnSgz5XM
“Fine is not a feeling Erica,” she noted.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlDeKFjsHw
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmJlWMyRTN
I breathed through my nose. I wasn’t anywhere near fine. I couldn’t understand why Damien left. It killed me even more that I knew it was a matter of time that he’d do it. I just hoped he would prove me wrong.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpjl2p1vzQ
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDHTgfZXq8Y
“Okay then,” I exhaled “I feel ridiculous about this,” I motioned around me “People get dumped all the time,” I said and my eyes stared on my lap “So I don’t get it why I have to do this.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6g9Z4lga6N
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvg9bLMN2j
“Because we want to make sure that you’re healthy enough to go home,” she smiled. I looked at her. I guess this could be done two ways; the easy way or the hard way.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNipL55xctt
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPb5jsrxQSw
“Yeah, still… I mean, people get dumped all the time but I ended up in the hospital. Always full of drama,” I rolled my eyes.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Kz0gMQ3WM
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6D5O9eFNLL
“It’s not your fault you’re here,” she said “When things bottle up inside they’re bound to overflow at some point.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ40x2L2whAM
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkX05a026zw
“I know,” I nodded. A deep sigh escaped my lungs as I curled my knees in front of me. “I feel it’s beyond me,” I confessed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjgACXVcXe
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgvs3c2TQ7
“What is?”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxMYRx3o3C
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35GeH1w0Vt
“How much I love him. I can’t handle it,” I paused “And obviously he couldn’t either,” I raised my eyebrows “I knew it was a matter of time before he’d leave me,” I confessed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBiR3z2f8bY
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wGR3fFo27
“Why do you believe he would leave you?” she asked. The tone surprised me. I always thought that psychologists ask blank questions, just to get into your head. I blinked and then scoffed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXePEPykacR
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJL04i28F3
“Why wouldn’t he?” I smiled a bitter, small smile.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssfypAYFf0
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxFZu1zdFT
“You should answer to that,” Samantha told me and saw her hand moving her pen on the notebook she was holding.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2IT2y2hTn
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1uu4VOt4sd
“Okay,” I exhaled. “I always loved him. That will never change. For the most part I was alone in this since he never knew and will never know how much I loved and will love him. I’ll just deal with being alone again,” I shrugged my shoulders “It’s not a big deal,” I smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVC2aMaAkw
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWaqNxDX8F
“Erica, I don’t think you realize how much of a big deal this is,” she looked at me “You’re body reacted to the emotional pain you pushed away. You need to deal with this before you’re body looses this battle. I’m not going to lie to you. You can give you’re self a heart attack,” she kept talking and the only think I could think of was “Fuck, he’ll actually be the death of me”.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kyAXxgb3P
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOM6DTZ6yk2
“Other people get headaches from stress and emotional pain, others get nausea, others all the above, others get heart attacks. Every organism deals with emotional pain differently. Yours is on the verge of giving you a heart attack. You’ve pushed yourself to the limits,” she said and I began fuming.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4DdAGLEROa
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOtLv0q3P7A
“So what the hell am I suppose to do? Make him love me so I’ll stop the pain?” I asked, my tone rising and my hands cutting the air in front of me. “You can’t make people love you! Hecan’t love me! I’m not…I don’t think…” I stopped to think the best way to say this “He’s too good for me anyway,” I whispered.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB427X1rTwn
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbJBDfnuzG
“You need to build up your confidence. You’re a beautiful, smart, young woman, Erica,” she said and I wanted to laugh.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIswHfJD4pM
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNEP9aasvL
“Well, I still didn’t worth his time,” I mumbled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgYqjqGZ8M
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvfrrikIHVS
“Have you talked to your friends about it?”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKbaabD0eR
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKE3lLwKN7a
“Not completely,” I replied and rushed to explain “I think you run into them earlier; my friends. They are twins. It’s their older brother,” I sighed “So, it’s complicated,”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEgejETSuVd
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXCvsVe9gW
“Why is that?” she asked again. Her questions were starting to annoy me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlm6oToIJ2
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeYn6QqgSQe
I explained all the reasons that made this so complicated for me. I figured that if I couldn’t get away from this, I might as well take advantage of the situation. Since I thought my best friends weren’t keen on listening what was going on inside my weird head, she was the only option.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMyeie1Klx3
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSBkAqOerXk
She discharged me from the hospital the very next day. I went home with four different pills to take each day and an appointment every two days for the next ten days.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1UMqWhRSp
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9Eo1fEq50
I had asked Cleo to wait for me until I was ready and felt comfortable to talk to her. She was supportive through those two weeks that it took me to actually feel human again and I was glad to have my best friend back. I could see, however, that she didn’t feel as comfortable, maybe because she was scared that something she would say or do would trigger me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41lzsOiqKm
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJTRml99g1
I didn’t even bother studying for my examinations using the hospital and the whole situation as an excuse. My parents of course were supportive about that, reminding me that what mattered what for me to be okay; an extra semester at the university wasn’t going to harm anyone.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOkazJccJDE
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7J0OVtZVN
The first month passed quietly and I managed to actually control my outbursts about Damien whenever I thought about him. Now, I would only cry during my sessions with Samantha, when I had to talk about him, or not even there. When Cleo couldn’t keep me company, Max would or when he wasn’t available Alex was there to keep me occupied.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfd2bW2mtKA
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwRMZZ9PgWi
“Are you okay so far?” I turned towards him from my seat as he stopped the car.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEaTqDrNJG
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9AoFijr0n
“Yes,” Alex sighed. I smiled and got out of the car, the bouquet of flowers in my hands. We met at the front of the car and I gave him the bouquet. “Okay,” he straightened up and sighed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPVO1jaWpb
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSLB1anxHAA
I check his black tie with my fingers to see if it was straight and put my hands against his shoulders.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0QC5AVbuFI
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVqCAVFWHeP
“Ready?” I smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05BZJmqV2N
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4UDjeoiUC
“Yes,” he smiled back and led the way.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZgGMBkDGka
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOdNT2v4RE
We walked quietly for a while before he stopped in front of a beautiful white stone. I noticed the name “Elizabeth White” curved carefully against the stone and knew we were there.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW0z2Ag1KzU
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKVNoBmEMU
“It’s been two years,” he sighed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxHPhBNhUt
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZSZCrQdUk
“That’s okay,” I told him “You’re here now. She knows you’re trying your best,” I smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy4kp9v3Qi5
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL3vgLA0um6
He turned towards me and smiled too before he walked away from me and crouched down in front of the stone. He left the bouquet in front of the grave and stayed there for a minute.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvM9UGVJIZL
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOy2VN5MhoB
“Do you want some privacy?” I asked quietly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1A0BorULEN
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAIs9i1JZRg
“No, I’m okay,” he replied as he stared at his mother photograph; his fingers brushing her face.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxQN03Q2dO
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6Ujq1Yk7B
Sometimes Alex confused me so much. Sometimes I wish he was like that before we broke up. Why did he have to show his soft side to me after all of this? If he did it before maybe we would still be together and maybe I wouldn’t be that hurt right now. But I treasured those forty days with Damien so much. They were some of the best days of my life and I felt guilty for even thinking that I would be better off.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcMAcTjRLp
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9PnVYAWuI
Alex got up and stood beside me again; bringing me back to the present. He took my hand in his and held it.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSuwIvZVks
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuKNXOTJDkE
“Thank you,” he whispered and lightly squished my hand. I turned towards him and as our eyes met I smiled at him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC6LidzQgDR
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGhijlWQa42
I turned my eyes forward again and sighed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuryzPHqx0q
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[+++]494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI95dyOF85x
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPL0HLtJlFC
The same week, Samantha informed me that she will cut down our sessions to once a week and I figured it was time to finally talk to Cleo. As far as I knew she had no idea how things with me and Damien were before he left.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxgrhJyevC
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzOKrZfHXZw
I invited Cleo over for dinner and left the option to invite Max up to her. I tried to keep it light, do what we did before everything happened; just order dinner and watch television next to the fireplace.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUnMksvs2b5
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpswqA9ZP3g
She arrived alone so I figured she would like for us to talk like this. We sat down and decided what to order at first. When the food arrived and I returned into the living room with plates and as my mind was already spinning I couldn’t help myself anymore.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWPSEwQtWj
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV3Lt4Z8xJ
“I just wanted you to be okay with it,” I winced. Cleo sighed and left everything at the coffee table.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wtxV898cm
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“I’m sorry,” she mumbled “I just didn’t want you to get hurt Erica,” she frowned as she looked at me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5qG8iAZ8g6
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“I know,” I mumbled and sat down on the chair. “I left because I didn’t want to get between you two. I would never make him choose, even if he’s the love of my life,” I confessed, not realizing what I said.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ZHfNC8ruz
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“You really love him?” she asked and a deep sigh escaped my lungs.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFASan6EhEV
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“Why do you think I’m in this mess?” I asked softly “Though he’ll never know,” a bitter small smile appeared on my lips.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Rl4ILPCEW
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“I had no idea,” she replied. Of course she didn’t, because she wouldn’t listen to me. “Were you okay before you left for the City?” she asked after a moment of silence.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjr1LNW97r0
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“Yes. I actually made several attempts to talk to him, to tell him how I feel but the only thing I’ve managed to say was that I was scared,” I scoffed.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLu1YW9y7XD
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I explained how he wanted to visit and talk to me, while I was away just to let her know that it wasn’t entirely into my head. Told her that he kept saying that he wasn’t going anywhere and that he wouldn’t leave me and that’s why it hurt so bad. Because he knew I didn’t want him to promise me things but he did it anyway. And then he broke those promises; and broke me into a million pieces.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1vtbKgVC9g
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Cleo wasn’t talking by this point. She would only make small questions to get the whole picture of the relationship I once had. Then I had to do the unavoidable; tell her the impact her words had. I tried to phrase it better though. I told her that I knew he was between relationships and that he never stayed with one girl for too long. I also knew right from the start that I’m not enough for him, that he wasn’t for me and I’ll never be enough for him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP00E8aMnhr
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“I’m sorry for saying or implying those things,” she sighed deeply.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP52qN3x5CH
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“I know you are. But it’s the facts,” I bit my lip. Before she said anything else I started talking again. “Before I even started getting back to normal, he told me he was going to Italy,” I said “So, I never really had the chance to talk to him again.” I explained.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsHT075MZj7
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“If I knew it was serious, I wouldn’t be like this,” she frowned.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ63YyKEDCH4
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“Don’t torment yourself. Obviously, you were right. I was right. It was only a matter of time before he left.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJGqN2HAac
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“But, I don’t get it,” she mumbled “If you guys were fine when he left the City, why he left for Italy earlier than planned and didn’t even say a word?”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCHoa5CPN3
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“If you find out, I would love to know,” I told her and now that I got all of that out of my chest I decided to grab a bite from my food that was waiting on the coffee table in front of me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWChpWp0vD
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“I’m gonna call him,” she said; sounding determine.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4i8E5pBGw
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“Don’t,” I rapidly shook my head.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkEmSCJrWq
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“Why not?”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZTlrNU2kLG
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“If he wanted to say something, he would. He’s the kind of guy that stays quiet and you know that. So, I don’t wanna ambush him like that.”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYhYJYYuFFk
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“Okay,” she nodded. “Do you want to tell me how it started? I hate it that I wasn’t near you when it all happened,” she smiled a shy smile.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmJzm6Ua9Qk
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“Remember that night at the summerhouse when Mike visited?” I asked and she nodded. “Since he had nowhere to sleep and I was drunk, we slept together,” I said and her eyebrows rose.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheAzrjY21O
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“Not like that dude! Slept for real,” I explained and she chuckled “Anyway, the next day we stayed back at the house and Alex pissed me off, I had to calm down and I got into the swimming pool. That’s when he kissed me for the first time,” a smug expression on my face as I remembered my heart bouncing, butterflies attacking my body and his lips tasting like chlorine. I shook my head to push away the memory.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MUtlhHBWf
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“He kissed me again after the renovation. We spent a lot of time together in the garage,” I said softly looking at the floor as the memories consumed me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPquPVeHXV8
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“Eat, your food is getting colder,” Cleo said out of the blue. I sighed and nodded.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVItfaTKa65
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“When Alex left the first time, that’s when the chest pains begun,” I told her after a while.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2WFzvpd3E
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“You never said anything,” she frowned, when she swallowed her food.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwoQCIc5klF
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“It only happened twice I think and once after he came back and he wanted to take me to the doctor but I convinced him I was okay,” I explained.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGc5bygzlEU
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“Is that why he was at the hospital?” she asked.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCLRlJRuBP
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“I hope not,” I chuckled thinking she meant that he felt guilty for not taking me to the doctor back then “I run onto him my last night in the city actually and he was a mess,” I said and she looked bored; Bored of the over-dramatic Alex. “Seriously, from his half words I understood he almost killed himself or started doing drugs. He had no one else, so I made him talk to me,” I shrugged my shoulders.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3vQda1rnQ
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“Good thing you run onto him, then”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7DCb7zayi9
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“It was,” I nodded “Anyway, when Damien left, he contacted me to see how I was, I lied at first. But you cannot lie to the master of lies,” I explained and she scoffed; agreeing with me. “He got me to tell him everything and as I talked the chest pain was there and he noticed. Only this time he dragged me to the hospital for a check-up. The next time it happened, two days later, I called him and the rest you know,” I explained.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9eQNxGTOk
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“Oh, that’s why he’s there,” she mumbled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR5Z5zOPC8P
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“Yeah, I got him to go to the cemetery the other day, after two years,” I said; feeling proud of myself.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kZPYEIUY9
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“Are you…” she trailed “Are you feeling anything for him?” she asked finally her voice small. I shook my head.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk9PNC05JLW
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“He’s only a friend now. He keeps my mind occupied and plus, I don’t want to be in a middle of a romance anytime soon,” I mumbled looking at my food before taking another bite. As that night came back to my mind, the second time Alex took to me the hospital, the reason came to my mind and a deep sigh escaped my lungs. I left my food on the table and leaned forward, touching my elbows on my knees.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifix1GKhYS
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“What?” Cleo asked softly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7LbAiWx9J
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“The second time I went to the hospital, I had called Damien and he answered. For the first time he left, he had answered his phone,” my voice trembled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡktGtKvOLOn
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“What, what did he say?”494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cJV8kX6f6
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“I told him that I just needed to hear his voice and he replied with a «So what?» I hang up the phone then, because I didn’t want him to hear me crying,” I explained but tears filled my eyes and I sobbed hard. Cleo put down her food and came to sit beside me. She put her arms around me and hugged me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq013XyWa9y
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“You’re gonna be okay. I’m here now,” she mumbled. That gave me strength and calmed me down a bit. I sighed as the sobs stopped and I hugged her back.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSI0Y63evPd
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“Thank you,” I mumbled as she brushed my hair and kept me into her arms. I had missed my best friend so much. Now that she was here, everything seemed easier.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2YuDdOfs0
♠ ♠
Title Credit:494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7MyX2g6umg
One Last Goodbye by Anathema494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX86a1UB0eT
