《請跟我交往！拜託啦！》 - 第一章體育課！

大家好，我叫柳困，今年十七歲，是一個看似普通的正常高中生。

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不過，我卻擁有一個不尋常的秘密──我仍然保有前世的記憶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg4nCC9MDii
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不對，不只前世……就連前前世、前前前世、前前前前世都還記憶猶新。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvKnI1HJd60
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問我為什麼？407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMofsYmvniN
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原因很簡單。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUIZSOLqWtO
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因為我是個單身狗。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomwMeMRw16
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在死後的世界，也就是「魂界」，神曾經立下一個規定：要談過戀愛，才能在轉生前消除前世的記憶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkl9fwVWenM
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「沒談過戀愛怎麼能算是活過啊？」那一天，神斜坐在王座上，興高采烈地宣布，「從今天開始，到死前還沒談過戀愛的，一律不准清除自己的記憶！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOMmsffjE7
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從那之後，世間開始不時出現保留著前世記憶的神童，他們也都成功地在重生後談了場轟轟烈烈的戀愛，並在死後轉生前順利清除了自己的記憶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9BzkBVtGn
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除了我以外。

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「喂，我說你啊，」在再次轉生到人間，成為柳困之前，神把我拉到魂界的角落，用責備但幸災樂禍的語氣對我說，「你要加油欸，你已經連續單身了十輩子了，學弟妹全都畢業了，就只剩你一個人還卡在這裡，不覺得羞恥嗎？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5aPt94Tf7W
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIMW0wT1tqX

「少囉唆！」我惱怒道，「妳也不想想到底是誰的問題！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡubAB1b8lFp
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「哎呀哎呀，現在是怪我囉？」神擺出無辜的表情。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡROQ0DQyEDD
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「這輩子！我這輩子一定會脫單的！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhOllR63Uau
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「你上次也是這麼說。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYSTg0SalG
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「閉嘴！才沒有！」我面紅耳赤，不等祂說完就直接跳進轉生之門。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWYmFQDm3x
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在那之後的十六年後，我進入高中，開始體驗人生中的第十一次青春期。我準備好要應付戀愛這場激烈的戰爭，也希望自己能在這一次的青春期成功脫魯。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZCnr7gMjp
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這個想法，只持續到進入教室的那一刻，遇見「她」為止。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rZB4yYLMt
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「柳困！該起床了啊！」一陣衝擊襲向趴在桌上的我，我一個重心不穩隨著椅子整個人倒在教室冰涼的地板上。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpe2IWrFhX
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTjeT5wlqW

「妳搞什麼啊！」我抱怨，起身拍掉制服上沾到的灰塵，「現在不是還在午休時間嗎？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4mw7qwb9i
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7pcr5dGkYa

「才不是，這節是外堂課欸。」說話的是一位臉頰微微泛紅的女學生。她的右腳舉著，明顯就是剛把我踹下椅子的樣子。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvnynZg7TB
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我默默的翻白眼，但是沒有回嘴，避免招來一頓拳頭。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcgDY8AZch
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我轉頭看了看四周，同學們都走光了，只剩下空蕩的桌椅。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWrMf1wmUm
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「走囉，體育課。」女學生紅著臉帶頭走出教室，我則跟在她後面。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkjPBSKmHnb
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLd7cLbVBv

什麼？你說她看起來就像是對我有意思，問我為什麼不跟她交往就好了？407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaPMo4zovzl
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我們再次回到剛剛的話題。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrcCeYbIjo8
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在高一時，我遇見了「她」。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlS6jhmgVIa
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她有著一頭紫色的長直髮，看到人總是臉頰泛紅，一副害羞的表情，還擁有一個美麗的名字：賴妍。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZGPb1BfDf
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvV42Dc9gdw

剛開始，全班的男學生都急著對賴妍獻殷勤，不過到了下學期的時候對她告白的人卻只剩下其他班的學生。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKgVOp7Bz7
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原因很單純：因為這個人很恐怖。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vP7o5g0qk
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxffYTApIr

恐怖到甚至被取了「瘋狗」這個外號。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4K3Wfh0SzX
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoPvOeJxY5Y

至於一天到晚臉頰泛紅的原因也不是因為「為了要操控他人」這種複雜的理由，而是因為「酒精」。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgmoUid0yyC
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡacdI9XLSoI

賴妍是我在到目前為止的十一個人生裡面，見過唯一一個可以在午餐時間拿整瓶五十度烈酒配完白飯的女人。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR8NO9fsBjB
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHsaUfClUF

永遠沒人知道她喝醉之後下一件會做出什麼超乎常理的事。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxR9SDwCmos
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xRh7UIFPU

我們兩人快步走到操場，看見體育老師早就已經帶完操，放同學去打球了，所以我直接略過暖身，自己抓了一顆地上的籃球，走到籃球場練習投籃。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6LyneojOvk
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3maECluBBC

「同學！」我投進第三球時，體育老師吹起哨子，「請不要在操場喝小米酒！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8a7UsN3T6
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYn0J5vNLa

我馬上轉頭，看見一旁換好體育服的賴妍把一隻腳放在長椅上，仰起頭抓著酒瓶猛灌。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoRBpWW0kJE

如果把背景換成公園，那她看起來就像一個普通的公園醉漢。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxIXGGLOta
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但是這裡是學校啊！

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「可是老師，我在暖身欸。」賴妍把酒一口氣喝完然後發出「噗哈」的聲音，接著用手背豪氣的抹抹嘴，最後啐了一口痰在操場外的草皮上。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhvrPQHJ8gB
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpfIJkmpL1

這不是完全就是公園裡的醉漢嗎！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7RcMYpH9R
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6XNNvDdPN

「那邊那位同學！」體育老師又朝另一邊大喊，「請不要在體育課投擲燃燒瓶！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfocaaCQTCC
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Zn7GDYqsJ

「可是老師，我在暖身耶。」手裡握著燃燒瓶正準備要丟的男同學停下動作。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWaaSdH3P0d
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwai4gjG83

這貨的名字叫簡澄，不知為何，他對燃燒瓶有著近乎癡狂的異常執著，不論是何種問題、處境都會想使用燃燒瓶來解決。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtndHyaEIwx
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對他來說，世界上不存在他的燃燒瓶解決不了的事物。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGc1ldoOquO
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有時候問題甚至還真的能夠解決，不過這只讓他變本加厲。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqGdpXZVSf
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像是現在。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1hdmiOCR4n
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你根本是在幫其他同學暖身吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3DwczWzKVe
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjak6HYDmZ0

你旁邊的女同學已經快要哭出來了啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBd7X7z1NGq
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIrREMOclq

體育老師也快來阻止一下他吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8rHBl7Q4IL
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTCY0PCOGN

「那暖身完記得收起來喔。」體育老師又繼續回頭看他的閣樓雜誌。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqR1SZYLWY4
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblA9c9WvrE

你這體育老師也太淡定了吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZyEkmL2VC
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3m70pXPNPw

至少先給我把閣樓雜誌收起來啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzr0o267Kx7
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在簡澄下手之前，另一位男同學抓住了他的手腕。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA50OIbcfCS
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyqPXzV93A1

「住手吧，簡澄boy，這樣不cool喔。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ufYmQKqAi

男同學一手抓住簡澄，一手按在自己的臉上。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAHYWGLw3e
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「可惡，最麻煩的傢伙出現了…」簡澄低聲抱怨。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOIuIa2Izd
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWobudO3ZOD

「你的惡行，就由我冥界的魔之眷屬 · 暗爪的歐威爾，依你的行為施以制ㄘㄞ────」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJQz6OeuYj
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP88S9y3c0C

「三岐，你的錢包掉了。」我走過去，撿起掉在暗爪的歐威爾身旁的錢包。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQLvhLl7fG
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「……我不是三岐，我是鋼爪的歐威爾。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2JTTnawRk
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「你剛剛說暗爪。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQHRIMKYo0C
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「不，柳困boy，我很清楚我是誰，」他一手放在胸前，一手放在身後，雙腳交叉向我行禮。

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「我，是冥界的邪王 · 鋼爪的麥歐爾，出自於冥界的望族，進入人間是為了要拯救我的妹妹，也就是冥界的公主，鎖鏈的康妮。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnevQw73b2f
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「你本來說歐威爾。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡctHcwVooDv
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「那、那是一時口誤……」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFnQnmexxLO
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「你，」我嚴肅的對著他說，「根本不知道自己是誰對吧？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1h7U3mbVi1
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBeHgmcadEq

「不…我不……」他按著額頭，露出痛苦的神色，在地上打滾。「不行……！『魂』…滾出我的腦海啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOi3V1j5Olk
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzANqyQAz6w

「邪王好弱。」我發牢騷。話說回來，魂界也沒有邪王這種東西就是了。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZSjC626bi
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「這個給你，振作起來吧，」簡澄把手中的燃燒瓶遞給他，為他加油打氣，「你可沒有這麼容易倒下！因為……407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QTe7FbCfA
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3m0sn9ehCN

「因為你可是……我的宿敵啊。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8xGD61Sbe
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簡澄露出了豪氣的笑容，把手伸向在地上的三岐。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeETucDKwg
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三岐擦乾淚水，回握住簡澄的手，正準備從地上爬起的時候，「有沒有人～看到我的～瓶～～～～子～～～～～～～～～」被喝的爛醉的賴妍一腳踩在後腦。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡih1x5nscgV
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7wLgPXx6uG

「你不是說只要暖身嗎！」「被」趴在地上的三岐吐槽。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyWBJeuuNW
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz4gjFWxGXs

「喔呀…？」賴妍往下一看，「早安啊三岐同學～在那裡玩會弄髒身體喔？」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9LFyZogibR
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0OeEd5WcDZ

「妳先從我身上下來啊！」三岐掙扎。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8YaRg8dBc
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBCOOdSM8I

「喔喔喔喔！好像在玩衝浪喔！」賴妍努力維持平衡。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe9JKDQ5U93
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiqVOZdYlH

「妳這是……在噗喔小看我身為暗印者的力量嗎……？」三岐說到一半還吃到土。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdq7vdiyqBV
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzCy1ApJyL

「衝浪了喔喔喔喔喔！」賴妍開心的大笑。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwT0vVYefUI
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她根本就沒在聽啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgGrvNEZDP
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「同學！」體育老師從看雜誌的姿勢抬頭，

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「不要霸凌有精神障礙的同學好嗎！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp32Ek1n5Rv
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkBq2EPTNR2

他只是中二病還沒好而已啊！為什麼變成精神障礙了！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1FSxvfW5Ly
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡALlYjBFPSO

「可是老師你看三岐，」在賴妍腳下的三岐已經整張臉埋在土裡了，「他玩的很開心耶。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrtSaBO6SC5
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOMi0tB8m9h

「唔唔唔唔唔唔唔唔！」三岐口齒不清的哀嚎。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBoTMkPv0R
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwic1bjsVeR

「注意不要讓同學受傷喔。」體育老師繼續看閣樓雜誌。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaL1jbnIdn
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這已經不是受傷的問題了吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOS2KQWEHS
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所以說給我把雜誌收起來啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4e9tV1YHMS
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cqOQK883I

「夠唔喔了吧！」臉不斷砸向地板的三岐好不容易擠出一句話。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgltvKyclBd
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「…………」賴妍臉一僵，慢慢低頭，看著她腳底下不斷扭動的三岐。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCHISoMF9EV
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「我、我的衝浪板會說話…好噁心喔……」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF3Fzl241eA
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtQ4QNyaYrF

她眼眶泛紅，吸了一次鼻子。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlhDS6Z4OFp
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兩次。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7XEsLmZfM
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「嗚嗚………………」賴妍開始不顧一切地大哭。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtYWqJSqcJ
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「三岐同學真壞。」

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「好糟糕喔。」

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「竟然害奇怪的東西哭了。」旁邊圍觀的同學們開始交頭接耳。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbZ3dIp5Bd
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說別人是奇怪的東西也太過份了吧！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcalMdYLXQ
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh7335MDhR5

「所以現在是我的問題囉！」三岐好不容易從嚎啕大哭的賴妍腳下逃開。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HtqeDKUN8
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfMIP9Bjm5E

「喂！誰來安慰她一下啊！」一位男同學慌張的大喊。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJWIO2VBmK
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「我能讓他冷靜一下。」簡澄拿出燃燒瓶。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMDc5GOquL
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「你只是要讓她熱起來吧！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHilpYNgkq
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrdmTpjL0N

「被吾封印的眷屬呦，僅從吾之召喚───」三岐振振有詞。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSDHPLPnF2j
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「你是要安慰她還是收了她啊啊！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7dagwIN4ao
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「收了她。」三岐露出一副理所當然的表情。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtXt8WSILEf
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MXIwmjHoY

「你們根本是來亂的吧！」你們別亂搞，我等等還要收尾啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQiW2rhaSq
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1k3IBGamco

「年輕人們。」不知道何時走到我們旁邊的體育老師開口了，「就憑你們是無法解決這種毀滅性天災的。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnprToIEhp
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「為什麼又從奇怪的東西變成毀滅性天災！」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU6CCNE1jyR
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw2i8mO30Gs

「因為奇怪的東西放久了本來就會變成毀滅性天災。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDBHphfwkX
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK06DnGG8OS

我不是在問這個啊啊啊啊啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mwtHPtO9v
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZxgT0qZcxT

老師又開口說：「現在，我就讓你們看看，真正的『大人的辦法』。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9TDgiD0We
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「『大人的辦法』……」簡澄看著老師嚴肅的臉，吞了口口水。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDlpekKGSVV
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「賴妍同學。」他走到賴妍面前。賴妍因為震驚而暫時忘記了哭泣。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcT1oRi7n8m
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話說我們的體育老師是一位看上去年過四十的大叔，比班上所有除了我以外的同學都還要早經歷了傳說中的青春期，再加上已經在這所高中任職了十年以上，所以應該也有足夠的能力與經驗能解決這種事ㄑ────407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitXSx2YRHv
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「你看，這是丁丁。」他脫下褲子。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwNPVsQ38B
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    是真正意義上的『讓你們看看』啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWtOwuSYpN
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  當日結果：407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YpfwAAUzR

賴妍平安無事（哭累了被女同學背回教室）。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmw8ud7Soq
簡澄打電話報警，體育老師於上課中被警察抓走，兩人前往警局做筆錄。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSlnFGwkfP
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三岐臉部異常腫脹，被帶去了醫務室。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvXvFp79Ofg
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其他同學（包括柳困）於下一節正常上課。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvinKmTaCxA
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柳困依然單身。

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第一章 體育課！

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第一章體育課！