510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHLHvsBkDp
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJsVhdCBPca
The next day, Jessy doesn't show up to school all day, nor the next day. I'm worried to death for him. Also at the end of class, I will question Amy in order to obtain his address. She gives a little smile which immediately makes me think that she is going to rush to find Chad and tell him but, honestly, I don't care. At this moment, I don't care about my reputation, all that matters is this boy who has already indelibly marked my life and for whom I worry so much. I have to struggle for a little while and make up a crazy story, but in the end, I leave the school with the coordinates in my pocket. Immediately, I went to his house. He lives in an old two story house which has retained its incredible charm, despite the renovation work it has undergone. The paint, a light yellow, was redone recently. It’s just the kind of well kept house my dad likes. This thought makes me smile. A covered terrace, where a bench and two armchairs have been installed, shelters the entrance to the house. I climb the three steps and ring the bell. I don't have to wait long before the door opens for Jessy.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAE33KSjy9p
— I’m not in the mood to worry, he told me point blank.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJE8tbDnXX3
He looks tired, preoccupied. Despite his obvious bad mood, I'm happy to see him. These last two days without seeing him seemed like an eternity. His mother comes up behind him. I can only glimpse it briefly.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8RRI7p3zn
— It’s for me, mom, he tells her.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ47MSgqkwSM
Understanding that he doesn't want to talk to me in front of her, I decide to play on it and, leaning towards him, I whisper to him : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNjdZyToUc
— I'll stay until we've talked, and it's too bad if your mother asks me what I want.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6a2s31LmY
His green eyes stare at me, trying to see if I'm bluffing or not, finally, he gives in.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡspUh1knELu
— Very well, I’m coming.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymTxpR6DKf
He grabs a denim jacket before following me down the street.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeFX5xnmkxh
We walk aimlessly, following the roads that pass before us in complete silence. I don't know how to start the discussion, I'm afraid of offending him, or of upsetting him if I question him too much.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBg9uiqzCLV
— So ? You wanted to talk to me, go ahead ! He says in a bad mood, as we arrive near an abandoned factory.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqu7KvDIwYj
Intimidated, as always by his presence at my side, I take it upon myself to get started : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv775fHLB3F
— You haven't come to school for the last two days...510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsmHhoHuDH
— Oh yes, you noticed, well done ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8SRL983nG
— Don’t be sarcastic, please. But you let me down for the presentation ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbIvb0hww2
— Oh, and you probably want an apology ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwjkdUahEv
— No, I don't care about this duty.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSvheT7m5e
I use a calm tone so as not to annoy him further.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbDFNGiH57
— Why did you come to see me ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJibVa8OM2
He stops walking.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0e4mOOIzx
— I was worried about you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpK21nnZOaZ
— Well then ! Instead, admit that you want details so you can tell your friends everything afterwards ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqedxj47rsz
— I don't plan to tell anyone about it.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6lmmQuGHy0
He examines me for a long moment, seeming to search deep in my eyes if he can trust me.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeLOc0PeKSR
— How long have you been HIV positive ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWyAkN5mRW
— It's been about a year now.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8j9TJIJAi2
— And how did you catch it ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBCRMZptDvn
— One evening at a friend’s party, I met a girl…510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSB0kfEnIzP
— And you slept together ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmRsfVDRPyg
— No, we watched cartoons ! He said, really angry.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAEPj1jLplY
— She didn’t tell you she was HIV positive ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvvt2Uqeic
— She didn't know at the time... A doctor called my mother a few weeks later, Haley had taken a test which came back positive. She had informed the doctor that I was one of her partners. I had to go get tested myself and that’s how I learned that she infected me.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAaKdyxsQ3
— Just for one night you spent together.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahg02BLmPR
I whisper this sentence as if to myself.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmG1ZlglEmP
— Not one night, just a short moment and a lack of condom and this is the result. A word of advice Meg : When you decide to do it with Chad, don't forget the condom otherwise you'll end up like me, a walking corpse ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1VsQ6Wji5
— Jessy, stop saying that ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtwXvuhdlpn
— For what ? It's the truth ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXKT65RQfrx
— No, you are in good health, it doesn't even look like you have this virus so you have to be optimistic.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9AI3BcpGfR
— As if that could cure me ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSmuK5KvnG
— Yes, it can help you hold on until the doctors find a cure.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNPQuCDHd7s
I spoke more firmly than I wanted. Jessy looks at me, surprised.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTA2NAnNR0R
— You're right, you have to be positive and enjoy life, right ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6tQhpzWyq
Suddenly his gaze changes, it becomes darker. He approaches me and takes me by the waist, holding me tightly against his body. I pull away from him immediately, not out of fear of illness, but as I would with any boy who did it this way.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAqGD8tCKH
— Hey, weird ! You don't want to kiss me anymore ! This surprises me greatly ! Go find your fantastic and healthy boyfriend and leave me alone ! he shouts as he walks away.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvC5B8BNTru
— Jessy, you’re wrong, that’s not it ! Come back ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZfIrmdWDQV
My words are lost in the silence.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9wElEMZzdZ
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqqhwbmHTS
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6aOJTZxOn7
The next morning before classes, which start later today, and where Jessy will certainly still be conspicuous by his absence, I am sitting in a corner of the snack bar. It’s a café where all the young people from high school like to meet for a drink, listen to music and chat. The room is quite large, with its light green imitation leather benches, its silver metal tables and its fifties decoration all in pink and blue. I found Chad there, who is having fun around a pinball machine with his friends a little further away, while I read Jessy's book. In fact, this is the third time I've devoured it since he lent it to me. The story of this man who fights alone against everyone to obtain his freedom after having been condemned in advance by public opinion now takes on a whole new meaning for me. Between these lines, it is Jessy’s life that I see. I can't stop thinking about him, and it drives me crazy. I'm dating Chad, I like Chad. So why do I only think about Jessy's lips on mine ? Why am I so worried about him ? How come I miss him so much ? I have already gone several days without seeing Chad, when he went on vacation with his parents, without ever feeling this emptiness in the pit of my heart. Yet I am in love with him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrd2wSIrgcs
Do I like Chad ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmONITrNEj
Ah, I'm going to go crazy if this continues ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpHRwrvENk
I raise my head and look at him, he looks at me and gives me a smile that I have trouble responding to, before he turns his attention back to his friends.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq5aCBZk3De
Why don't I feel anything when I look at it ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQ4cKXRSqY
Putting my thoughts aside, I carefully dive back into my reading when Amy approaches me. That day, more than ever, I had no desire to talk to him. As I expected, she reported my comments to Chad and, as always, I had to justify myself. Luckily we have this talk to give, it gave me the perfect excuse.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNdCpICml5
Amy lifts the cover of my book and whispers : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMM4pXNCXsb
— Put down that book ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJ3y9NoWR7
— It’s a great book ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡob8bzRxIQu
— I will never understand how you could want to read outside of class, there are so many things510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgxDebnnkjL
much more exciting to do…510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNgP2fNaa4g
— Excuse me…510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJxbxOASKb
I get up quickly after seeing Jessy passing in the street.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6TSupGH9J
Hurriedly, I leave the café.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxXrHAhWeP
— Jessy ! Wait for me ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSMAvj2GP5
As usual, he hears me, but continues on his way.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjkBrUMYLa7
— I have your book ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9TXGrR6WO
This time, I manage to catch his attention, he stops on the sidewalk.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5kMyi3lxI
— What do you want from me ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3vApJgkjek
— I just wanted to give that back to you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMp3raGjmTz
I hand him his paperback, staring at him, my heart rate increasing.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqXsnRKLwu
— And then, I wanted us to talk.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2d9W2i26H
— I think we said everything. You should go back to your boyfriend.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxGisXOCJP
— I don’t want to talk with Chad, but with you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZStBm5PYx
— Thank you, that’s a pleasure, says a familiar voice behind me, making me jump.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3uyoSoxdsR
I quickly turn around to see my boyfriend.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6bJkD7Uvz
— It's not what you think. But I need to talk to Jessy.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡemyoPhkKIl
— We have nothing to say to each other, he repeats.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCGOiImCZir
— Glad to hear you say that ! Stop hovering over my girlfriend ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqXYDqu0C9A
— Hey, I’m here, Chad ! You don't have to speak on my behalf and even less tell me who I can talk to or not ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVRwjVc8MW
— There, I agree with you, replies Jessy.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡotBzJUedqE
— We didn't ask you anything ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhN2uOA2ziB
— Leave him alone ! It’s me who wants to talk to him ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbUhPvUVRi
— Are we having a threesome now ? Chad angrily grabs my arm.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsZBZGyfsQs
He squeezes it tightly and takes me with him towards the snack bar.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3HSouHAR2
— Let me go, I demand, trying to get out of his grip. You're ridiculous ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI3InhjJdxA
Chad tightens his grip further.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiBsfqIe1OP
— I just want to talk to you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe7khLtrWP
— So let go of me, you’re hurting me ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRWIhbyVFX
— Let her go ! Jessy demands, interposing.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFeeDS3h3Qs
— Don't get involved ! My boyfriend shouts, finally releasing my sore arm before pushing Jessy along the wall of the establishment.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwmf44rPHG
— Don’t hit me, Jessy warned.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0DMG5zxcNJ
— Ah, Monsieur gives more orders, says Chad angrily, putting his fist in the young man's stomach.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0EfN8GJIf
In shock, Jessy doubles over, dropping his book.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNhNsEUVnr
— Chad, stop ! I scream in the middle of the street.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKUduRKwuGE
Jessy, still hunched over, rushes at Chad and knocks him to the ground. He finds himself straddling him, trying to keep him on the ground while asking him to calm down. But you don't know Chad very well to think that he's going to let himself be controlled so easily. Soon they are rolling on the sidewalk, almost falling onto the road. Chad finds himself on top of Jessy and punches him in the stomach again. Then he stands up, waiting for Jessy to get up. When he gets back to his feet, he spreads his hands in a sign of appeasement, but Chad rushes at him again and hits him in the cheek.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YX9b8mNAv
— Chad ! Leave him ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20V79WKRJn
Jessy picks up his book and walks away, but Chad comes at him again and hits him in the back. Jessy falls to his knees as Chad walks around to face him and grabs him by the collar of his T-shirt.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbilTzRgIkB
No matter how much I beg him, Chad doesn't listen to me. I am about to betray my promise when, fortunately, two police officers intervene to separate them, surrounding them.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9CmnnNA1p
Jessy immediately regains his calm while Chad continues to struggle in order to continue the fight.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXMasbjWaN
— What is happening here ? Asks the officer holding Jessy.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡetBW2rhcDp
— This guy is hitting on my girlfriend, Chad shouts, still annoyed.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKDdNCcD7Gf
— Anything ! I shout angrily. Jessy is a friend and there’s no way you’re going to forbid me from talking to him ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZFAArAfMA
My boyfriend stares at me in astonishment while I think I see recognition in Jessy's eyes. This has the gift of calming Chad who lets his arms fall while blowing.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DcM5BH9yx
— Can we let go of you ? Asks the second police officer.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6ST8UPaNH
Both boys nodded weakly.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNQKQkanrj
— It’s not over yet, Chad says, staring at Jessy, before heading back to the snack bar.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5eDlvXsnX
— It'll be OK ? Asks the other agent. He hurt you, do you want to go to the hospital ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTNXiFvCV8
Jessy's complexion suddenly turned pale.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVC51dYS0y
— No, it’s okay.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ftyECkxVF
— I’ll take care of him, I intervene, moving closer to him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAI30De8JGk
With a knowing look, the two police officers walk away.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqQQ16BE03
— Thank you, Jessy sighs.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6XJJ1DwRL
— You seemed panicked at the idea of going to the hospital.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEg73CJ0KGL
— Yeah, I'm not a big fan of it. I've already just left my doctor's office, I'm not going to spend the rest of my day on a stretcher.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXWceUcXQY
I pick up his book and give it back to him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQ5BaD5MiJ
— Do you want to talk now ? I ask.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuHszQkytr
Jessy purses his lips.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRS8qmIbf9A
— You never give up ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkWdJ23NmDK
— It depends on the subject but when it’s something important to me, no, I never give up.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBqYQP9FdV
Jessy seems touched by my words, he lowers his head and nods, pursing his lips.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCMt1BpmPO
Without even asking him if he plans to go to class this morning, we head towards his house.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyzcgtzCUa6
— Did you like the book ? He finally asked after a long silence.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoS1RcrXPPd
— I devoured it ! I'll have to buy a copy.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LpjiwS7L7
His smile is radiant when he tells me : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQj5kW30x0
— I'm glad you liked it. You're the first person I've told about this.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJyTGwVrkRx
I take advantage of this confidence to try to learn more.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsL6H2Y3pbh
— You told me you went to the doctor, are you okay ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXjRBM13duC
— My doctor told me that apart from being HIV positive, I am in great shape. She will do regular blood tests to monitor how the virus is progressing and has also encouraged me to join a support group of people who have the same problem as me, he tells me as he stops walking.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3LvE8X1pwY
I meditate on his words for a few seconds, I know how important the subject is and I definitely don't want to focus on it.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9KdLSKQwe
— I think you should try going to one of these meetings. After all, what are you risking ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4nylaB3eW0
He raises his face to the sky and observes a cloud which moves slowly, pushed by a light wind.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0AfdHt5tF
— Maybe you're right.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5YKBhIgPnY
Satisfied with his answer, I leave him in front of his house. As I head back home, I'm torn between the pleasure of being closer to Jessy and the anger that overcomes me when I think of Chad. I know this situation has gone on for too long.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhiRk376vMJ
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9zDktogyT
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNH6RW78Kz0
I had barely crossed the threshold of my house when my mother told me that Chad was waiting for me in the garden.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2eJHxIME9y
— Neither of you have been to class and Chad looks upset, she said. What's going on, Megan ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9d4vjtBSIX
— I'm sorry, mom. I should have warned you. Chad and Jessy fought before we went to high school. Chad crossed the line, Jessy is hurt, and believe me, he really didn't need this.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WQqRYgUaM
My mother examines me carefully. I'm not going to lie, along the way I thought about how events unfolded and the more I think about it, the more my anger grows.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL833EZBBuk
— And this fight happened because of how you feel about Jessy ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdWuCBCpLPm
I agree, nodding my head.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfryot2MAbI
— Now, do you know what you are doing ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrA478ujpmx
— Yes, even if it is painful, I can no longer hide my face.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuqfCO7MDP
My mother gives a little knowing smile.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZADXOfyGQA
— GOOD. I don't like it when you skip school, but this time, I'm giving up. You will go to class this afternoon. In the meantime, go and sort this situation out. Good luck.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWAuvAYfhAH
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ESJHX2uZR
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcIpdiaZo1
Chad is pacing around the yard when I open the back door of the house to join him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoQ6CjQiGi
— Finally you're here ! Were you with him ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcTplgUioCj
The tone of his voice is icy. If he thinks I'm going to let him talk to me like that, he's sorely mistaken.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSBBl1L4z4k
— Remind me, when did we get married ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxHN5jFKKc1
— Pardon ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtN4OI4lDoz
— No, because the reason you're acting like an incredible asshole is because we've been married for years and you think I'm your property, right ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVnRPt3bi6
Chad puts his hand to his forehead and bursts out into mirthless laughter.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4RIY08E0ci
— I should have known you were going to take his side. Damn, Meg, you don't realize this guy is manipulating you to separate us ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CIpwqAtFB
If until now I had managed to keep calm, his words made me lose all control.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEak1CJEUQK
— But you are completely delusional ! I'm not your thing, I'm free to do what I want ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNE16iKEsBp
— Like sleeping with him ! ? He writes to himself, clenching his fists.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnfSi3Fsl8e
— I'm not going out with him ! I scream. And I'm not going out with you anymore ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJeqvC554cr
In shock, he takes two steps back.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukkeoX5WFh
— What ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7R4p2UayXt
— You understood me very well. It's over Chad.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN70Kt42cXx
— He succeeded then ? He wanted to separate us and you become his accomplice.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc3OFkZrnf2
This time it’s me who’s in shock. Where did he get such an idea ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5E2qtYAqPd
— No, but do you hear yourself ? I'm talking to you about us, not Jessy. He never even suggested that I break up with you, even after you hit him earlier.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSw4m7P3s5s
— You're not going to make me believe that it's enough for you to realize that you don't love me anymore.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSjQnbvJXo
— Since we have been together, I have asked myself a lot of questions, I admit, going to sit down on a chair in the garden furniture. We have nothing in common. I know that I annoy you when I talk to you about literature and you annoy me when I try to share a moment with you and you are so captivated by a match on TV that you don't care.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykJyGvh6dM
Chad opens his mouth to respond but remains silent.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyc0VeZdyQz
— You know I’m right, I insist calmly. You and I have known each other since we were kids, we have always been friends and I think we should have stayed that way.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡafJGqcEhRS
He takes a deep breath as his eyes water.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPVKVRQ2W4
— So you don’t love me anymore ? he whispers.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdzbw7Ct3W
— Yes I love you but, contrary to what I thought, I realized that I am not in love with you. I love you as a friend, not as the man of my life.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIgguBCBBII
— And did you realize how you felt, before or after falling in love with Jessy ? He get angry again. It’s not over Meg ! I'm sure this guy is hiding something and trust me I'll find out what it is ! You will come back to me Meg ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylYCRbHdFh
— Chad ! Chad ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI0bDFIoUwK
But it's too late, he's already slammed the door behind him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOkkpMRGtv
I feel relieved to finally have been able to put into words what had bothered me since the beginning of our story, but I am also worried at the thought of Chad discovering Jessy's secret. I hope his threats are out of anger and that after he calms down he will realize their stupidity.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT9NMvHLAHs
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJqYkKSuM5S
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCq3pkyC8qg
In the afternoon, I head back to school and smile as soon as I see Jessy arriving in the main hallway.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDUWAaAuug
— You’ve decided to come back, I comment.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡffARneg6nG
— Yeah, I don’t want Chad to think he’s got the upper hand on me, he replies as we walk down the hall towards our class.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8JDTVI1Ai1
— Good choice. But I need to talk to you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIBkoSNvHxD
Without waiting, I pull him by his jacket away from the crowd of students and lead him into a corner near the boys' bathroom. I don't want anyone to hear our exchange.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGx8dQa3jC
— What is happening ? He asks me, frowning.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGVTeVSc5DW
— Chad was at my house when I got home.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYIlBilvIT
— Okay, he says slowly.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4zPA2O7vz
— I broke up with him, I admit abruptly.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEMbl5jk2W
His already piercing gaze locks on mine and never lets go. I wish I could drown in it but I only have a short time before the bell rings.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡViUifdQUup
— He is very angry with you. He thinks you made me dump him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnsDVr0P1Y
— I have never done that ! He writes to himself, shocked.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgCk53ZdJP
— I know that perfectly, but I think he's looking for someone to blame for our breakup, when there's no one to blame. We're not meant for each other, that's all. Anyway, he told me you're hiding something and he's going to find out what it is. So be careful, okay ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIY9BDi2oXq
— Yeah.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZWGltRQV0
He leans against the wall behind him and whispers, with tears in his eyes : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUjBJCJLNsN
— I don't want it to start again like in my old school, I couldn't stand it.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlh2OWnlCD
Seeing him abandon his armor in favor of sincerity upsets me beyond words. In these moments of fragility, I meet the real Jessy, not the one who takes a cold attitude to send me away but the sensitive boy who has suffered too much.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSZuCa2eOFZ
— That won’t happen, I reassure him. You are not alone here, I am your friend, I will always be here no matter what happens.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeEQS4cY6Y
— Thanks Meg. I thought about what you told me earlier, about the support group for HIV— positive people. I called my doctor to ask for the contact details of the center.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6OoYBxLq9a
— Great, I smile. It will help you to talk with people who have the same virus as you, you will certainly be able to help each other.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucGeEIYlrd
— I don’t really believe it, but I’m going to try to go to a meeting, he said, resuming a distant attitude. So maybe you'll let go of me a little ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcexHbT4BD
The bell which announces the resumption of classes interrupts our discussion.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4ir7ZKA01
— Here, I said, handing him my notes. That way you'll be up to date on math.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4576O1KPaZ
— Thanks Megan. Sometimes it’s good to have you in my life ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWrYhpjRVyY
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzCG4fwzhks
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4l4JvejBtr
The last bell announcing the end of the day has barely sounded before a rumor invades the establishment. I'm putting my things in my locker when I hear whispers about Jessy. I turn to him who is standing a little further away in front of his locker. He lowers his head, shoulders hunched and lips pursed.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZABFEoFAqV
Around us, the students murmur among themselves, stunned. At the time, AIDS was still a little— known disease; we were only in the early stages of medical research. There are lots of rumors about how and why this disease spreads, but the truth is that people still know very little about it. The only things we know for sure are that AIDS is scary and deadly. All eyes are fixed on Jessy, those who pass behind him move aside to make sure not to touch him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIV58UjbP8q
A student I vaguely know passes in front of me, I intercept him to ask him what this new rumor is.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT113iUxuDB
— You are not aware ? Jessy Sutter, the new student, he has AIDS and what's more, he's homosexual ! He announces to me proudly. Above all, don't go near him, you never know.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcROyBvADdl
I don't have time to send him away, he's already moved away.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90dcXP1Ela
I look at Jessy again. He raises his head, fixes me with a burning look of anger before leaving the school as quickly as possible.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqUJx5OrGh
I do not understand anything. How can everyone know ? One thing is certain, given Jessy's fury, he thinks I betrayed him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqq06LL8Tk2
I rush after him but when I get outside, he has already disappeared.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7RwmwV9HJ
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLO80bx3RE
510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7ovu9vmjF
After looking for Jessy all over town for what seemed like hours, imagining him alone, depressed, I gathered up my courage and went to his house. The door opens to reveal his mother.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ow7NJ5cTo
— Hello, she greets me kindly.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5VjHLC4mP
From the first glance, I feel that she is an understanding woman. Her long blond hair and green eyes identical to those of her son reflect the gentleness that I also detect in Jessy.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡados2EFdGZ
— Good morning. Is Jessy there ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmlJjMGzS6
— No. You're Megan, right ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofDOJqZsbx
I nod in agreement.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMR2UD8QXT
— Jessy told me about you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBWTj3pxNF
— I've been looking for him everywhere since school ended, hasn't he come back ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRP9BQHaQZ
— No, I have not seen it. He must be walking somewhere now that everyone knows Jessy is infected.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJTmd4WrPvo
I look at her, surprised that she was able to guess, she continues : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIkIEKKiFYs
— I received a call from the school. Apparently, parents of students learned of the rumor and immediately reported it to the school administration. I am called this evening to talk about my son's state of health and to see if he can continue his education in this establishment.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN01vCylPfn
— My God, this is nonsense ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEMTVdRhg7a
— Unfortunately that's what happens when people know Jessy has AIDS. Everywhere he goes, he is rejected. This has happened before in Allentown, and it's happening again here. Everyone is afraid of being contaminated by simple contact, even my husband can't stand living under the same roof as him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL3lZ24syEr
Mrs. Sutter shakes her head as if her thoughts could evaporate with that gesture.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53bvdTBWg7
— It is so unfair. I need to talk to him. Contrary to what he thinks, I did not betray him. I don't know how his secret was revealed. You don't know where he might be ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0pkS3h6xH
— He sometimes leaves alone for hours.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoDvkUNDyx
— You are never afraid that he…510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOswu8mx6Hr
Mrs. Sutter looks at me as if to say, “Would that be worse than what awaits him ?”510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbz8O87dMAg
I thank her and go home, totally dejected. Not only do all students now have to know about Jessy's condition, but even the administration is threatening not to keep him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaXfAQKzcra
When I walk through the door of my house, night begins to fall. I hear my parents talking.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXIavOLtJ3
— Meg, it’s you ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxyikokgJ9
— Yes Dad.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9fxUJ2SUOw
— Can you come ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNeJ8VKiClC
I walk down the hallway and into the kitchen, where my parents are sitting around the table.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8yeT0V7fb
— Nina told us what is being said around town about Jessy. Is it true ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0dipcWDpdh
I nod silently.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZUcuTaVLF
— How long have you known that ? Ask my mother.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2hQUjk9Pm
— Since the other evening, when he stayed to eat. He admitted it to me when I took him home.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tjdOtqBeB
— You could have told us about it ! My father points out.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzB9jMA4Ts
— I told him I wouldn't tell anyone. I didn't want to break my word...510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMjLtzeaU2
— Then how…510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRqwQRKUlx
— You can believe me mom, I keep asking myself that question. I only see one answer : Chad. This afternoon, he was very upset with Jessy and promised to find his secret. However, I don't know how he found out about it.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOje76Djvtl
— Is it true that Chad fought with Jessy because you wanted to talk to him ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6884Nfadqu
I nod.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVDz7TrutM
— Chad wanted to force me into the snack bar, Jessy intervened to defend me.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaoyQX31mo
My response makes my father clench his fists and he says : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf39oaP11PA
— He loses nothing by knowing what I think of his way of fighting like that and the rest.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGqAHZ1xH0
— Are you aware that Mrs. Sutter has been summoned to high school ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyufFRI5JRK
In front of my parents' questioning looks, I tell them the words of Jessy's mother.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAfLsZ7WTo
My mother makes a few phone calls and tells us : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDIDnYN0Uh
— The parents’ council is meeting this evening with the administration. Officially, they can't fire Jessy because he's sick, but they can send a report to the academy who will judge what to do in such a circumstance.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1BIAdI0c2
Seeing my dismayed face, my father said to me : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUm0mpYamGu
— Don’t worry, darling. We will go to this meeting and we will support Ms. Sutter. It will be fine.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXgwSzVLpD
Less convinced than my father, I go into the garden and sit on the swing. Alone with my thoughts, I realize that I have suddenly aged. Before I met Jessy, I was a carefree kid with few worries, but now I see life differently. And to think that it’s only been ten days since Chad’s party. I wanted to become an adult, I'm served ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQ7ykkrWoO
Jessie, where are you ? I sigh, mulling over the latest events. I don't hear Nina open the back door.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OI0HOTxlI
— I was wondering where you were, she says, making me jump. The parents are out, Chad is there. He wants to see you.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuQeab86of
I sigh again. After what happened this afternoon, I still don't want to talk to him. But he doesn't wait to hear my opinion before following my sister who, feeling the storm brewing in the sky as much as with my ex-boyfriend, slips away.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAiHbX9hbw
— I came to apologize for my behavior this morning. If I had known Jessy was gay, I wouldn't have been jealous of you talking to him.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzwXvGiBuY
I huff, exasperated. Chad looks at me, I see the incomprehension on his face.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpBeowwOn2x
— He is not homosexual. It was a girl who infected him ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7K5LzwORTZ
— Sorry, but how could I have known ? You don't tell me anything anymore ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLWqFyuB3y
— Sorry, but when someone tells me a secret, I do my best to keep it. Were you the one who revealed Jessy's illness to everyone ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYZ4QazBykq
His false innocent appearance betrays him even before he confesses. I think I see a little boy having done something stupid with his hands in his pants pockets, squirming for words. Even when we were children, he behaved this way. His attitude makes my anger explode.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpsLOJPAem
— It's about time you grew up, Chad ! You are so immature at times ! Do you realize that now everyone knows about their state of health ? That he might be kicked out of school ? That you're ruining his life ? But no, you don’t care as long as you make him pay for my breakup ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRj7UkkejKv
Annoyed, he lowers his head. This attitude annoys me even more.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuaT71SlhbF
— I know, I screwed up. But if you had told me everything...510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQG6sa6vTRP
I give him a murderous look. He's old enough to know how to behave.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡua1W7VFsvz
— Don’t ever ask me why I broke up with you again ! If you want to have an answer, look at yourself in the mirror... That is, if you can ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEstJYoJFvN
— You don't even realize that since he arrived in town, you have completely ignored me ! Chad gets angry in turn.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvktaPeGtQR
— It’s nothing to do with it ! I'm the guilty one, the one who understood that we are too different. Jessy had nothing to do with our relationship ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCieeymPSH2
— I know, he whispers. I heard him say it this afternoon.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ973K6wPNFw
My eyes must be as round as saucers because Chad continues : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDURtbwE9CE
— I was behind the bathroom door when you were talking. I heard your conversation, that’s how I knew.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKUQQuGsK4c
— Oh my God ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSZgGQnfxW
With tears in my eyes, I place my hands over my mouth.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEq0VAvZOKD
— I’m sorry Meg. I didn't want things to go this far.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzyul1mMha
— And you rushed to repeat it to the whole school ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh5JG9BZFnS
— I only told a few friends but it spread quickly. I really blame myself.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpW9zFfKKi
My eyes filled with tears, I whisper : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZXIagIRdiB
— You can.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZIK9lNVBSJ
— You’ll never want me again after this, will you ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlhSF1jeprQ
I shake my head.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwlVBMylSi
— You disappointed me a lot, Chad. You are still my friend but I no longer trust you. I'm sorry.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtXF5qrvL1p
— You don’t have to be, it’s my fault. I went way too far. The role of the jealous boyfriend doesn't work for me, he smiles sadly. Do you want us to remain friends ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepbV9IUQRv
I nod in agreement. I know that after digesting these events, I will forgive him. I can't not have him in my life, he's been part of it for too long.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONtr52Qm1e
Chad is about to enter the house again when, turning around, he says to me : 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvcPUzDOpQM
— By the way, if you're looking for Jessy, it seems he hangs out near the bridge over the highway.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87ymgWa8WD
As soon as Chad leaves, I put on my black parka and head in the direction he told me. Night has now fallen, the air is heavy, the storm threatens to break out at any moment. I hurry the three kilometers, running half the way. I arrive on the bridge, out of breath, but happy to see Jessy there. It is a narrow bridge, reserved for pedestrians, it allows us to reach a corner of the forest which encircles the city. Jessy paces along the steel guardrail, watching the cars and trucks speeding by on the dual carriageway just below. His face is half lit by the streetlights placed all along the highway. He turns to me as I approach.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHhd2l6D3pF
— What are you doing here ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhu3xx90PQ
His tone is dry.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxqj18XFOMX
— I've been looking for you for hours.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIB9epHfKz
— Well, you found me. You see, I'm still alive, you can go back now.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVlbkDQknS
— I'm sorry for what happened. I discussed it with Chad, he was the one who spread the rumor.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡte9YpMsBZF
— So you came so that I could forgive him ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRqwyqzdXE
I look at him, incredulous; However, I have to admit that he is not entirely wrong. I wish we could all be friends, but I know that is a utopian vision of our friendship. However, even if she is often embarrassing for his interlocutors, I like Jessy's frankness.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5SU3Ffo35
— I came because I'm afraid for you. It's late, come home with me.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnNuDIHxJZP
Jessy looks at me with a disillusioned look but doesn't answer. He starts walking along the railing again, moving away from me. He seems hypnotized by the vehicles passing beneath our feet.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLimYOKmY6
— Ever since I’ve known you, you’ve spent your time moving away. Why are you running away from everyone ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡclEKXDklhS
I shout to cover the sound of a heavy truck passing below.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOEKky3piR
Suddenly a lightning bolt tears through the sky. Jessy turns around angrily.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLwBLPzReO
— I'm not running away from anyone ! It's the others who never want me ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnE4o30Wnld
He sits on the railing which is only a few centimeters wide, passes his legs over the air, wraps them around the metal bars. A new flash of lightning illuminates the sky. Despite the heaviness of the night, I tremble and move closer to him to hold him by the back of his jacket.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWY7wdJpmWF
— Jessy, please. Come back ! You're scaring me ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8Nm0sQ0or
— I'm a danger to others, Meg ! I'm just on reprieve from this crap ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkX9nNaPpzW
The tone of his voice is no longer charged with anger, but full of despair. It squeezes my heart.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrBaRv7Qhf
— No ! You are not a risk to anyone ! And you are still here, alive and well ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxyVAblzyM
Thunder suddenly cracks, startling me. I move closer to him and tighten my grip.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3HciaEzlF6
— Do you want to know what brought me here ? He says to me, letting go of the railing with his hands.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTrAcQk7VTq
He opens his arms wide, closes his eyes and falls forward, screaming in rage. Despite my efforts to hold him, his leather jacket slips through my fingers and I let go.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyFnCOY7N7
— Jessy, no ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCw2DkMwTi
I scream as loud as I can as I see him fall into the void.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDpfPSHlCSb
I put my hands to my mouth while closing my eyes, not daring to open them because I am so sure that he has thrown himself under the wheels of the vehicles passing underneath. And then I suddenly realize that I care about him much more than I wanted to admit to myself until now. Yes, he's HIV positive, angry at the whole world and he spends a lot of time telling me off and yet, without knowing why yet, I can't help but think about him every minute. Suddenly, I hear him scream again at the same time as thunder cracks near us. I slowly open my eyes to see him hanging by his legs above the void. With a quick movement, he manages to stand up, then sit down again on the railing before coming back to my side. I admire his flexibility as I breathe with relief. He rushes straight towards me angrily.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhuMgJ4NyeX
— I'm going to die, Meg, my life expectancy is so low that it's not worth living ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2AKw4RhGrp
His voice is thick with anger and despair.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4mqf6PHUI
— No, I said, crying. You're not sick and you may never be sick, but you have to keep breathing, keep fighting this shit ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tYbxGUyPO
— To do what ? What awaits me in this cursed life ? Everyone will start turning their backs on me again, whispering in my way, being afraid of me.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4f2k2i8l5
Do you think that’s what it’s like to live ? 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcENwx9qVR
He points to the highway.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjayR3BVnm
— AIDS has already made me fall into a void, vehicles have already crushed me. And none of your prayers or hopes can save me ! he shouts.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm6Vi5DxV1
My tears increase in the face of my helplessness. Jessy is going to die, it's just a matter of time and, in this second, I am fully aware of it.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiAK1iDxkZx
— This virus is circulating inside me and nothing anyone says or does to me will make it go away ! I will have to live the little time I have left carrying this burden alone ! I can't, I can't take this anymore. Reliving what I experienced in Allentown is beyond my strength ! 510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6gzOrs4yk
He lowers his arms, weariness written on each of his features. Cries that he has had to repress many times flood his face. I go to snuggle up against him, immediately his arms embrace me.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGRWdpe55z
— I’m here, you’re no longer alone. I'm here Jessy, I repeat to him several times, hoping that my words penetrate his bruised heart.510Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv4gKLtWUFg
Above us the storm calms down as the rain unleashes, mixing our tears with those of the sky.
Penana
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