I'm a horrible person.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPoXMwKdJu
Anti-hero, my ass. If I was a person reading this, I'd think that anyone who'd support the writer of this diary would be crazy. Despicable.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNitacX2bc
After all, I've ruined many lives. Broken up families. Hurt an unfathomable amount of people. There are even people that have taken their lives as a result of my actions.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvmDZDjwfF
But I don't feel anything for them.
It was fun at first, you know.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmE7ChDvZEr
It's nerve-wracking. Exhilarating. The echoes of screaming. Distorted faces.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9StTbpAV8
Projecting the faces of people I know onto the victims.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpP502Wwzo
Seeing people beg for mercy. A power trip, you might call it.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0ivfqGzbG
Have you ever had someone at your complete mercy? With their body under your foot, telling you to spare them at any cost. They would do anything.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKq7pWYcFrV
Feeling your fist connect with someone's gut. A crowd of people watching you, yet powerless to do anything.
It was my life. I would spend most, if not all of my spare time planning how I would be able to rise up the ranks. Get more media on me. My character.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAooTaLsEZL
I can't help but grin when I overhear people talking about me in person.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4F2oU1UCNM
When I read the comments under compilations of my appearances.
But it's tiring.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLN6ey6BGf
The constant hate. The fear of being watched. The fear of being discovered.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKAU1Mbldt
I don't usually say much, but when we're talking about something I'm passionate about, I won't stop.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpoXsheHRqZ
Naturally, I'm grateful they put a curse on me so that I don't accidentally blabber confidential information about villains.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6OgrPYl1p
But as heroes and villains are common topics of discussion, it's easy for me to get carried away. And after that happens, the anxiety hits.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3qzR4VEwmS
What if they figured out my identity? What if they realise how despicable I am?378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5y9l3ftFjg
I can't talk to them again. It's too dangerous.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdcZLUswyM
Call it an irrational fear, but I can't help it.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGzR1LwPLr
Sometimes I wonder why they picked me when I knew what I was doing was wrong. Well, I guess it's better than those who flaunt their crimes.
And gradually, I numbed myself to humanity.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQVuQAtz8S
Those aren't humans. They're disgusting lumps of meat. They don't have a will of their own. Look, how they're squirming beneath my feet, promising to disown their children in order to stay alive. How one leaps in front of the other to finally die and be remembered as a hero despite living a life that can only be described as trash beforehand.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPZ3dqttXU
If I hated humans before, I came to despise them with all my being.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsKeThCf6c
Hope for humanity? Don't be ridiculous. Heroes don't exist. They're just garbage, like you and me, parading as luxury goods, made to capitalise and give false hope.
I'm tired of all this. Of being reminded of how revolting humans are.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMEIABVQDh
Of being lonely.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfDzTCmn6JW
Pathetic, right? Even though I think like this, I'm lonely. It's not something I'd like to admit. I'm always alone, so you'd think I'd be accustomed to it. And in most cases, I prefer to be alone. But I can't help but feel lonely sometimes.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0uBBETJxWq
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDulLDjtU3
So I take comfort in my own world.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdOtRhePGS
If the Organisation doesn't want me, then no one would want me.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgp3aC3jIc
I joined hoping that I'd be of some help to society despite being a loser, only to lose what little faith I had left in the world.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLf48gp56Bu
Truly, I deserve to be called a villain in all aspects.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfj4yJnLVpO
I hope you're happy. I hope the heroes are happy. I hope the higher-ups are happy.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVsGGGThQe
Or maybe I hope that the world ends tomorrow and we all get what we deserve.
The power of friendship, the happy life that's always being portrayed in mainstream media doesn't exist. It's all lies.
I tried, you know. I tried hard. I had perfect attendance in school. I did well in tests. In sports. But why? Why can't I bring myself to try hard for anything now? All that's left for me is to be the villain. With no one on my side my whole life.
You don't need to pity me. The families I've ruined sure don't.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeVsIAo9RH
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SPL6hL1fY
I can't keep doing this forever. I'll have my memories erased, and then what? I'll just keep being unwanted. I'll barely pass my studies. Get a mediocre job that I despise. A quiet life that made no impact. I was raised to be "special", but I'm not even special to one person.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEc18084LGR
Why does a part of me keep screaming to be recognised?378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2oOpooB74K
If only I could have been more dedicated. If only I could work harder. If only I had a dream.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaqqWmSsKFk
378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlyuEUIh0V
What would it be like as a hero? To have people not looking up to me from beneath my feet, but from respect and admiration? To have cheers whenever you walk by instead of when you're defeated and humiliated? But I can't even handle the expectations of my parents, much less the expectations of the whole public.
I can't even be a proper villain. A villain wouldn't have thoughts like these, right? They wouldn't even be writing something like this in the first place.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUSBVU0e7y
I can't be a normal human being. I can't be a hero nor a villain.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLaGl8YYnqz
I shouldn't even have been born.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZx4cpDF4lj
The Organisation didn't even need to pick me; surely there are so many people out there who're better at being the villain than me.
Ah, well, whatever. It doesn't matter anyway.378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvbRRKtrmB
....378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWkAx5CERc
[Deleted passage]378Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHxDg0FlWwF
