今天又來說「說話」。816Please respect copyright.PENANAqqWx7bOt8A
從前說的普遍是理論性的,816Please respect copyright.PENANAJE81EUdHz1
走心法方向。816Please respect copyright.PENANA21vww9oQLd
今天就來分享一式拳法。
「或者......」816Please respect copyright.PENANAv6CNm1z72X
「不如......」
當你想表現得比較有禮貌時,816Please respect copyright.PENANAod0medBpOk
可能是跟陌生人開會,816Please respect copyright.PENANAU49LxAIsQQ
或是擔任接待,816Please respect copyright.PENANAx792t8MNXO
適當時候在句子前加上或者/不如,816Please respect copyright.PENANAvhc9w1ep6y
就可以給人一種會尊重別人的印象。
以阿德勒的看法,816Please respect copyright.PENANAqBM1VjigZT
每個人都是自己世界的主人,816Please respect copyright.PENANA8IVvv864qw
所以我們都很討厭別人擅自進入我們的世界還要指手劃腳。816Please respect copyright.PENANAnORQmyBTIg
奈何生活就是不斷的與他人的世界碰撞。816Please respect copyright.PENANA01grFxfusx
甚麼是尊重?816Please respect copyright.PENANAcexAS1OJzJ
就是當我進入你的世界時,我懂得作客,不越權。
「或者」「不如」這一類帶遲疑、建議意味的字詞,816Please respect copyright.PENANA3ABYC3AQQy
就能暗暗傳遞出一種「我沒有要作主」的意思,816Please respect copyright.PENANA8Ee78INWFJ
所以聽見的人就沒有一種被入侵、被冒犯的感覺。816Please respect copyright.PENANA8t0rz8EPcg
只要他本身沒甚麼意見,816Please respect copyright.PENANACSAjVkR0e2
大多數情況下都會跟隨你的「建議」而行。816Please respect copyright.PENANAhFNOlOBQRf
不然,不管你「建議」的內容是甚麼,816Please respect copyright.PENANAKwN2lUUxGQ
對方一感到被冒犯就可能會反抗。
這是我個人常用的招數,816Please respect copyright.PENANAu3XKw6STbB
不管是當7-11便利店員,816Please respect copyright.PENANAZnPG7138Pr
或是大學跟人討論project的時候。
如果是想跟下屬拉近距離的上司們,816Please respect copyright.PENANApp18YRCnt5
我也建議這樣做。816Please respect copyright.PENANAOFk09rCLua
傳統的上司總是一言堂,816Please respect copyright.PENANAB2QpWEsJ53
營造一種高高在上的印象方可控制下屬。816Please respect copyright.PENANA2DHlDxDH9S
可現在社會改變了,816Please respect copyright.PENANAoa3FdfnlkG
你是要只會按指令做事的機械,816Please respect copyright.PENANAW1x8a9Jqgh
還是敢進諫的下屬?
當然,有一些不懂事的人可能會鬧事情。816Please respect copyright.PENANA88CkFJWnkP
例如,你:「不如我們嘗試這個吧?」816Please respect copyright.PENANAMCEFyjyWVo
他:「不要。」816Please respect copyright.PENANABemdjkbOym
反對不是問題,816Please respect copyright.PENANAkQqiIPUVeP
但沒有理由的反對就是任性,816Please respect copyright.PENANAidTLgTlk0M
所以這時候不識大體的是他。816Please respect copyright.PENANAQA0XEjQLhS
如果你性格比較剛烈的,816Please respect copyright.PENANAuMDYasPWXd
你可以跟他翻桌:「那你想怎樣嗎?說呀!」816Please respect copyright.PENANAilUgVStJEx
只是我個人不太建議這樣。
還有一種變種的用法,816Please respect copyright.PENANA9iuE1MRACS
是跟朋友逗著玩時用的。816Please respect copyright.PENANANFDiAWFJEh
「你去死啦!」說太多?816Please respect copyright.PENANARcy0nHqwAH
你可以嘗試「不如,你去死啦,好嘛?」816Please respect copyright.PENANAcfWls1R1HM
再配上一個廉價的微笑,一流!
但這些詞不是天生雪蓮,816Please respect copyright.PENANAlD9kVm1XZi
單用就可起死回生。816Please respect copyright.PENANAYjx9fydzXs
它有用的原因是它能把語氣從「命令」改成「建議」,816Please respect copyright.PENANAaoOwTCQ912
所以如果你能掌握語氣的轉換,816Please respect copyright.PENANAKH2fZJkaJv
不靠這些詞你也能靠說話表達尊重。816Please respect copyright.PENANAzQylBS0AQJ
若果不能,你硬用這些詞也只是把語氣變得讓人難以捉摸。