1、假设御天迷路了，然后遇到了漂流。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6xf4HFngUd
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRRJsJWjOS
漂流：又迷路了吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZcuSz8THM
御天：切，我只是在闲逛，你滚远点，风景里有你都变差了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwdtgAxqTJ
漂流：要去哪儿啊，我送你去呗。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLX5F7Bi9T
御天：都说了你滚滚滚滚滚！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd8T28lf22Q
漂流笑而不语，一会儿道：我跟剑鬼消息了，他说你们在小雷酒馆集合，这都差了大半个城了，你怎么能迷到这儿来的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86vxEZ86W4
御天：要你管！我跟公子要卷轴过去。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQUC2CdSo9
公子（消息）：卷轴5000金。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfwOB5IC9r
御天：QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFpM1qZGQS
漂流：你看，所以说还是我送你过去吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbydruXP5d
左手&右手一齐点头。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTKInTGVzd
漂流：今天的风景挺好的，我们走走看看过去好了。反正你已经迟到了，也不差再晚一点。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyM5MvhYVj
御天：……你他妈走就走！拉我手算什么！给我放开！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaT4fIujr0
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90HqhOj5Ct
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7OhxI4edU
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhMXXZeHn0
2、有一天，大家一起在小雷酒馆喝酒。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzSltK3xkC
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl5GgZKvJaJ
公子：小雷，这酒不错，再来两杯。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSxybpyNOk
小雷：好~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSD60nVOuiZ
御天：公子好像已经喝了好几杯了，怎么还要喝啊。酒有那么好喝吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdEgFjkyXla
战无伤：这是大人的爱好，小孩子你就不懂了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAHrJsVgUD
御天：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTwOSUsNBy
佑哥：不过公子喝了那么多……我算算，大概得有5000金酒钱了吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnLNFcPYyh
战无伤：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMICkPuRgP
剑鬼：重要的是，待会儿我们好像有任务，他喝成这样我们还能做任务吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30yM3moQj3
众人：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JVT0SD5Vv
公子已醉，面色红润，东倒西歪。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4t1lvmwH5
佑哥：那个，要不谁来阻止一下他？（小声）反正我是不敢……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLn1QFiPQ2
战无伤&御天：我也……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYBbuLGXHd8
剑鬼笑而不语。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHorXV0ZIU7
千里：一群人婆婆妈妈的是不是爷们啊，我来！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjraUxuhfQD
众人：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpfQ5OkFcFg
千里（一把夺走公子手中的酒杯）：公子，别喝了，要做正经事，赶紧的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIXeu5t9Ui
公子（媚眼瞪来，看似秋波暗送，实为横眉冷对）：还来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoY18nS7uqa
千里：别喝了，这都几点了，做完任务我还赶着下线呢。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQYakpWLiL
众人：切~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCcnPdzsNrl
公子（不断往千里身上靠，伸手去捞酒杯）：还来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUXHPRLgZH
千里（慌乱状）：喂，你别乱来啊。大庭广众的……你给我下去，下去。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEMwGrCSnj
公子（整个人都坐到了千里的身上，蹭来蹭去）：还来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lTK44cyEC
千里：擦！你们别光顾着看，帮忙啊！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUKw3p9EYe
众人：你爷们你自己搞定。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Bcm6eV14t
千里分身无术，只得趁乱自己把酒给喝了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlBaLnS5zNE
千里：好了好了，走了走了，做任务去。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOsTvYV5TW
公子：嗯？这里好像有酒的味道，是藏在这里了嘛？（摸着千里的唇）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1NemoCZVD
佑哥&剑鬼默默看向两边，战无伤蒙住御天的眼睛。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2qIRu8246
御天：干嘛蒙住我，我要看，我要看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfZ4QTbaJH
公子按住千里的脑袋送上香吻一个，千里瞪大着眼睛看着公子妖孽的面容近在咫尺。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm8nn7rgNnM
系统：您的心跳过快，为了您的身体健康，系统将在十秒后强制离线，现在开始倒计时，十，九……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxWyDSczHF
于是只见白光一闪，千里从酒馆消失了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZck4hvBAsD
公子：切，怂货。小雷~再来两杯酒。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiembj9qEMd
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡat9x0RwJKL
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0GgtC2OnQ
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiyn0T3rP0
3、和漂流一起做任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2F4R9EQy9j
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqxhtkwm5d
御天：为什么这个家伙会在这里！！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKQIw08CZOf
剑鬼：咳，漂流是过来帮忙做任务的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡugWIl4U72Q
御天：强烈要求把这个家伙踢出队伍！他一定是来当奸细的！奸细！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡosegLccU9R
剑鬼：好了，我们来谈一下这次任务怎么分配。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiEVWHS2jW
御天：……QAQ（被坐在旁边的漂流微笑着顺毛）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wnpb7Rvjx
公子：这一次的任务是千里弄来的，啧，又是一个越级的奇葩任务，线索也不是很明确。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4UNFzneIc
千里：嘿嘿。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi71et2DASW
公子：首先是主城沙漠古城的北部有一个教堂废墟，根据任务提示，里面应该会有线索。剑鬼和千里去那边调查一下，随时在频道里报告情况。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88VxM0KupD
千里&剑鬼：好。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2elqPmCMz
公子：接着是所谓城外有关海市蜃楼的传言，那是我们最终要去的地方。佑哥和战无伤一起去打探一下，找一下有没有入口。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxmB7C4E29
佑哥：包在我身上了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IfDnTnCUE
公子：然后是那个强盗寨子，剩下还有谁？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAllJuXH19
御天：我，我。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡInK8jkq8sJ
公子：嗯，那你和漂流一起去打探一下情况。左手也去，右手和我留在城里做接应。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdfRGIkZjp
御天：我反对！我不要和这个家伙一起行动！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8eLimlY7lh
公子：反对无效，你能自己找到寨子的位置吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZc9CO7azPq
御天：……QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡired6XTzfx
公子：好了，那就出发吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzaKZNvz66S
公子掏出卷轴，白光一闪，众人便从小雷酒馆里消失了，随后九个人便一起出现在了主城沙漠古城里。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmbkVYWXpP
御天：公子，可不可以我和佑哥去查海市蜃楼，战无伤跟着你，让右手和那家伙去寨子，反正他们三个人经常一起行动。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgW1bZCEAX
战无伤：我去！我难得一次不当保镖我容易吗，别跟我抢啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPDqM26iZsD
公子：漂流他们都看不到佣兵团频道，联络起来不方便。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3pkd344Dcm
御天：那，那我就跟战无伤换，让战无伤跟着那家伙好了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvaw9sCarjz
佑哥：别啊，带你去，到时候我是找入口还是找你啊……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1S3iKIsBgH
御天：……QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUD2RYQIo8k
于是漂流开开心心地搂着呆滞中的御天出发了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2PSy3tFIi
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsWJXkFJ9oD
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZpSmmpmkG
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1lRI2ATwK
4、和漂流一起埋伏。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl47zUK7xmg
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqAmjN82bC
御天：……我们为什么要在草堆里埋伏……我们不是来跟NPC打探消息的吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeJuHfIbZf
漂流：这里的NPC比较特殊，都是强盗，指不定一见面就直接化身开怪，所以我们要先观察一下。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxamy8r2GnP
御天：那左手为什么不来埋伏？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqWaSO8BC4
漂流：全部都埋伏了，就没有人和NPC说话了啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGtARLx30He
御天：我可以去，你和左手埋伏观察好了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjocKSb13Pd
漂流：可是那样的话我会不放心啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBq0g8NGBA
御天：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9YrDtwFNE
左手和第一个NPC说话，没有被砍。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRCa7YCoV2
御天：好像没什么危险，要么我们也出去吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe8gZE8x0p
漂流：不好说，等等再看看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW25UP4ZXrH
左手和第二个NPC说话，还是没有被砍。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9ph9GyfHs
御天：好像真没什么危险，我说你是不是太胆小了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjg9eXEctF
漂流：不是胆小是谨慎。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfbI3b5oIks
左手和第三个NPC说话，依旧没有被砍。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WHoPEWmfC
御天：好像真……………………TMD你在摸哪儿！你敢吃我豆腐！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6RyCCpBTa
漂流：我只是怕你蹲久了身子麻，帮你揉一揉。乖~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MmKPA7hun
御天：滚！蹲久了也用不着揉【哗——】啊！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmculTGC8es
（佣兵团频道内）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGbcQYUdLmO
御天：我抗议！我正在被那个家伙性骚扰！QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rSoDi2w55
众人：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObGEEHKfqp
公子：啧，漂流眼光真差。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMGfNYHJcq
千里：就是。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgj592UjCqw
众人：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMPUoAOxqc
御天：靠！你们这对狗男男。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRr5fYsuiJ
御天决定自救，遂掏出家伙对着漂流。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkVP6TLw5w
御天：信不信我现在就砍了你。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOJZql7lMF
漂流：距离太近了，你射不到我的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiO51n0VSH
御天：靠！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCXe46xjtd
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBHAENvCSr
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6kv63mRyWs
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lYba78Mfg
5、又到了一年一度的情人节，游戏里也举办了活动。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9B07dJlQA
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimcF1VlEDC
剑鬼：系统通知都收到了吗？情人节貌似有特殊任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcandFLs5ON
战无伤：情人节任务关你什么事，你连对象都没有。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9deXdtYXkM
剑鬼：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPthOXuUlg
佑哥：根据我的情报，貌似也不是只有情侣才能做任务，还有单身的任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB0Lmyori7g
御天：啧，你们这群光棍就去做光棍任务吧，我去找葡萄妹子陪我做情侣任务，哈哈。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOR2Obukpv
众人：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm4NQKSJLU
御天欢天喜地地奔去找葡萄妹子了，剩下的三人结伴来到街上，打算去接任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzwlIFC0Vn
剑鬼：任务怎么接？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWjv2DlPlF
佑哥：听说是找城里的NPC接，具体还没有打听到，但听说一看就明白。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQaxe7jzkA
战无伤：是指那个吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1t9PnUfyQI
战无伤指着不远处一排卫兵，只是与平时不同的是，几乎每个卫兵头上都戴着一个写着“死”字的头巾。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAe6G0LxptG
佑哥：大概……走过去看看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXQHA6lZot
三人走到一个戴着“死”字头巾的卫兵面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzzM3WquQqy
剑鬼：情人节任务怎么接？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡplNeYTpgzA
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！拿好这根火柴，去烧掉10对“隐秘的情侣”就可以成为我们的高级团员，我在这里等你消息。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5YpfkZAVu
系统：是否接收道具“光棍之棍”？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkumdXYGJnl
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5LN0eqsL4X
战无伤：怎么样怎么样，我看卫兵好像给了你个什么东西？武器？加什么的？啧，一上来就发东西，真大方啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBhG2xiwpyo
剑鬼：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1qgG9YsiW
战无伤：嘿嘿，我也去领一个，你们等着。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxKAd7CzlX
过了一会儿，战无伤领好任务回来了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XPj3G0wWj
战无伤：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZR2IrsdObK
过了一会儿，佑哥也领好任务回来了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccrR10mmzP
佑哥：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4nO5aeGO1
剑鬼：不知道没有带头巾的卫兵有什么区别？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxcOjYWpzkz
佑哥：再去试试看呗。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrTYevSr5U
三人走到没有带头巾的卫兵面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTWX1xxemE
剑鬼：情人节任务……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvb0NIClIo
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……咦？你是去死去死团的！！不要烧我啊！我没有女朋友！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEv1gflYrz3
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsn89VzL0vb
（与此同时，同城的另一个角落）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttDZCfQg7I
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……你们看，我连礼物都买好了，是她一直想要的项链，你们可不可以帮我送去给她？这对戒指就当做酬劳送给你们好了，上次买来被她嫌弃难看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8s2NruYTN
系统：是否接收道具“情侣戒指”？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8DjUKlVg9O
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBnVjhMpAB
剑鬼&佑哥&战无伤千辛万苦终于烧完情侣回来了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTFFE6sUTZ
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！干得好，你们真是去死去死团的楷模！这个礼盒是成为高级团员的奖品，里面的东西你应该用得上。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3tigNAR2jg
三人打开礼盒后，发现都是自己职业用得上的装备。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZvd4GRCww
佑哥：还真是普通的奖品啊，不过属性还不错。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpIVjB6e1q
剑鬼：我这个没什么用，还没有我现在用的那个属性好。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXf0f7KviW
战无伤：奖品算什么，烧情侣才是重点。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKy3S5lJHx
佑哥&剑鬼：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmhqzM8G7n
这时，三人突然看见御天气势汹汹地从远处走过来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMy8zfOtGPz
佑哥：哎，御天，情侣任务的奖品是什么啊？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjhxaBn8Vx
御天：…………………………漂流在哪里！！让我烧了他！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNEiqzrnht
然后御天又气势汹汹地踩踏着红尘滚滚地离开了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj14OgtmBrI
佑哥：御天怎么了？吃火药了？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeXbzhf74FU
公子：他只是被漂流坑了，不能和葡萄一起做情侣任务了而已。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20PXHlqKWO
佑哥：这样哦。哎哎？公子你来了？咦？千里也在。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHy9fv5RYwD
公子：想知道情侣任务的奖品？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg57UdcTJl3
佑哥：是呀，是呀，公子你知道。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡczmZwpr4mQ
公子：就是这么个玩意儿。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdkNVUubnMT
公子从衣服里掏出了一枚戒指，随意地扔在众人面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3UbuxYsbYw
佑哥：我看看。情侣戒指，任务物品，不可交易，火法抗性+20%！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBW75XU7KLP
剑鬼：数值挺高的啊。不过火法抗性对你没什么用吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwHqSVUXq0
公子：活动的噱头而已。一开始发任务时候就给的，任务完成后可以永久持有。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxVwkftJpfJ
战无伤：等等！公子你和谁一起做的任务！难道是去重生紫晶借的妹子！这样的好事怎么不叫上我啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOItIohkSe
公子：和千里做的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJsfkhLbPF
战无伤：原来是和千里做的啊……神马！和千里！男人也行！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY85taLOQ4m
公子：谁跟你们说过情侣任务只能男女做。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ch626S4YH
战无伤：靠！无耻！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrlwwcItf0
（N个城外的某个角落）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLRju6HG0I
漂流：我说，你总是这么追杀我，我都没法去找那个谁的女朋友了，任务完成不了对我们谁都没好处。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dvCV72AOc
御天：去死吧！谁要跟你完成情侣任务！完成不了最好！去死去死去死！！！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe61Ko0ouey
漂流：都说了这么近你射不到我的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KY9cvQ43p
御天：那就滚远点！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRBImaZGnV
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUaO6fQ7Yv
* 补充：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIPjxm7wr3Q
如果不是两个人去找非去死去死团的NPC：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzZpQzsHqn
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……对啦，我有女朋友的事情可不要跟我旁边的兄弟说，他们是去死去死团的，我怕我会被烧掉。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTHA5gd8UFP
如果领好了情侣任务再去找去死去死团NPC：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYrf0wck08
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！神马！你们是情侣！烧掉！！（受到卫兵火法攻击，不过情侣戒指的火法抗性针对该NPC是100%的，记得带好就不会挂。）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5zqbQo1tdD
关于情侣任务里的卫兵的女朋友：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9erDKKSo8U
看起来貌似找到就可以了，不过其实是个boss需要打一打。把项链交给女朋友后，女朋友会很快注意到情侣玩家身上携带的情侣戒指。虽然是自己曾经嫌弃的东西，但是看到戴在别人的身上依旧会暴走。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1gta5QWDv
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMPniHNUdy
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ414U4dsG9A
6、佑哥在练级区泡到一个妹子。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNmF8Dp4yc
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOq5b9uwO8
妹子：哎？你真的是佑哥？那个无所不知的佑哥？（星星眼）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqSXhJZ82P
佑哥：是啊，你有什么想知道的尽管问我。（自豪状）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBfnTSZ9oa
妹子：那你快告诉我双鬼谁攻谁受！我纠结这个问题好多年了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDG3UIBxo50
佑哥：额，公子和剑鬼？不是啊，公子和千里才是一对。咦？妹子你要去哪里？等等我呗〜61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSEbxGCIiY
妹子：小晴！我的CP被拆了！酒鬼大大居然跟那个叫千里一醉的是一对！我的双鬼啊！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmms8sqPb4h
小晴：哦，我无所谓啦，反正我是公子总受派的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRlOSpnJZV
佑哥：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yJ7a2Qpcw
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuQ9eY5Mem
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7SFMCcxR3
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQAJPCWE2S0
7、有一天，御天在三次元里碰到了漂流。（私设）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2DJf2tQ2O
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhK265io1wN
御天：QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88UF0t9QLX
战无伤：怎么了？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPEeU3PUIjb
御天：我今天遇到漂流了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2adVnYoEf
战无伤：你不是天天都遇到他么。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOoRM7y1J3V
御天：不是说游戏里，是在电梯里遇到的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgdEq5QD5SM
战无伤：哪儿的电梯？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwOE1Qe6g7j
御天：家里的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBNWcv8y6Ky
战无伤：哟，你们还是邻居啊？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EUUKw2cvj
御天：对啊，我也不想的！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv57M9ORD5M
战无伤：[蜡烛]61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzxMJ9xF8a
（过了几天）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4D5mRFX6G
御天：漂流你给我滚出来！有种你跟我单挑！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWi3Qii1wu
战无伤：他又怎么你了？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxR3kwKnja0
御天：他守我电梯！现在每天都得跟他搭同一部电梯下楼，真是生不如死！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNj6Bw6So06
战无伤：[蜡烛]61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhGxcoH8Vj0
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrU7fPgEEMU
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2J6zi8gpJ
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0F6v0DItp
8、小雷又研究出了新的酒。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjP6jRJGph
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpfasRKZal
小雷：公子，这是我新弄的酒，系统酒馆都没得卖呢。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKf4IZzKse
公子：哦？不错，来一杯尝尝。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Kf6OFm7MX
于是小雷很开心地跑进去把新酒端了上来，然后小心翼翼地看着公子品尝。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjiJtZPSWR
小雷：怎么样？还不错吧。我觉得公子会比较喜欢这种口感，所以特地配的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhJLRNlMan
公子：嗯，不错，知我者小雷也。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8OBZyEj5n
小雷：嗯嗯。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmmjnErsLp
公子：小雷，我突然发现，你才是我生命中最重要的人。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN2GRiF0UBZ
小雷：公子！（泪花闪闪感动状）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCGr28t9Q8
公子：小雷！（泪花闪闪感动状）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6q2xUYXIKQ
千里突然有了深深的危机感。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcl3pZLst7
佑哥：嘿嘿，新酒不错啊，小雷也给我们上一份吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLE6qd3FuI
小雷：你们？哦，做这个酒挺费时间的，我做了好几天才做出几杯，都要留着给公子呢。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDh89b926Fu
佑哥：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWq24nsLOb
小雷：不过倒是可以给你们喝点别的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFnZtaPC3k
过了一会儿，小雷又端上来几份不属于系统酒的不明液体，一人一杯地放在众人的面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRC0G3Bd372
佑哥：……这是啥？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCXLjB6blC
小雷：研究过程中的副产品，看在你们是公子的朋友的份上就免费给你们喝好了。用的材料也很贵，倒掉怪浪费的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3gKj8uthS
佑哥：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMPoPZA1gdD
众人突然有了深深的危机感。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzELJ9hn46
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsv0AvOWwb
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DSTOhlJKA
FREETALK61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6RowpmMil2
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxj3MUGtGKo
感谢收养这份……没什么意义的段子集XD。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88RPviV2KD
看完近战以后就很HAPPY地各种脑补，并弃无数坑于不顾地来写近战的段子。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKhPvmJxew
近战里一直很很很很很喜欢漂流，直到他黑掉，我惊悚脸啊！御天也非常可爱，每次碰到漂流都一副炸毛的样子，我于是便当机立断这是一对XD（神马逻辑！）。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gT9xlaP5r
韩家公子也是我超喜欢的类型，智慧型美男啊~~~~~然后每次公子指点江山，我都会很YY地想着，公子你果然不愧是贤内助。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpA9nKn1SzS
然后是御天和战无伤，万年泡妞无果二人组，这两个人一老一少一搭一唱总觉得也很有意思~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5kE8YawPW
剑鬼是最最最正直的真汉子！所以脑补他每次被众人的各种欢脱弄得无语到麻木，于是笑而不语。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5f7Zv49JR
至于佑哥的话，情报王嘛~ 情报=八卦（不对！）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYC2yNLJ6B4
总之，如果以后还有机会也会在写近战的段子~欢迎大家来我微博或者博客上看哦~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1PHI8tfN9
以上~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqXSnByHXD
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNO8kVolem
2013年11月
ns216.73.216.166da2 61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRRJsJWjOS
漂流：又迷路了吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZcuSz8THM
御天：切，我只是在闲逛，你滚远点，风景里有你都变差了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwdtgAxqTJ
漂流：要去哪儿啊，我送你去呗。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPLX5F7Bi9T
御天：都说了你滚滚滚滚滚！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd8T28lf22Q
漂流笑而不语，一会儿道：我跟剑鬼消息了，他说你们在小雷酒馆集合，这都差了大半个城了，你怎么能迷到这儿来的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86vxEZ86W4
御天：要你管！我跟公子要卷轴过去。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQUC2CdSo9
公子（消息）：卷轴5000金。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfwOB5IC9r
御天：QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFpM1qZGQS
漂流：你看，所以说还是我送你过去吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbydruXP5d
左手&右手一齐点头。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTKInTGVzd
漂流：今天的风景挺好的，我们走走看看过去好了。反正你已经迟到了，也不差再晚一点。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyM5MvhYVj
御天：……你他妈走就走！拉我手算什么！给我放开！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaT4fIujr0
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90HqhOj5Ct
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ7OhxI4edU
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhMXXZeHn0
2、有一天，大家一起在小雷酒馆喝酒。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzSltK3xkC
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl5GgZKvJaJ
公子：小雷，这酒不错，再来两杯。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSxybpyNOk
小雷：好~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSD60nVOuiZ
御天：公子好像已经喝了好几杯了，怎么还要喝啊。酒有那么好喝吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdEgFjkyXla
战无伤：这是大人的爱好，小孩子你就不懂了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAHrJsVgUD
御天：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTwOSUsNBy
佑哥：不过公子喝了那么多……我算算，大概得有5000金酒钱了吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnLNFcPYyh
战无伤：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMICkPuRgP
剑鬼：重要的是，待会儿我们好像有任务，他喝成这样我们还能做任务吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30yM3moQj3
众人：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JVT0SD5Vv
公子已醉，面色红润，东倒西歪。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4t1lvmwH5
佑哥：那个，要不谁来阻止一下他？（小声）反正我是不敢……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLn1QFiPQ2
战无伤&御天：我也……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYBbuLGXHd8
剑鬼笑而不语。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHorXV0ZIU7
千里：一群人婆婆妈妈的是不是爷们啊，我来！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjraUxuhfQD
众人：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpfQ5OkFcFg
千里（一把夺走公子手中的酒杯）：公子，别喝了，要做正经事，赶紧的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFIXeu5t9Ui
公子（媚眼瞪来，看似秋波暗送，实为横眉冷对）：还来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoY18nS7uqa
千里：别喝了，这都几点了，做完任务我还赶着下线呢。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQYakpWLiL
众人：切~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCcnPdzsNrl
公子（不断往千里身上靠，伸手去捞酒杯）：还来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUXHPRLgZH
千里（慌乱状）：喂，你别乱来啊。大庭广众的……你给我下去，下去。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEMwGrCSnj
公子（整个人都坐到了千里的身上，蹭来蹭去）：还来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lTK44cyEC
千里：擦！你们别光顾着看，帮忙啊！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUKw3p9EYe
众人：你爷们你自己搞定。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Bcm6eV14t
千里分身无术，只得趁乱自己把酒给喝了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlBaLnS5zNE
千里：好了好了，走了走了，做任务去。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOsTvYV5TW
公子：嗯？这里好像有酒的味道，是藏在这里了嘛？（摸着千里的唇）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1NemoCZVD
佑哥&剑鬼默默看向两边，战无伤蒙住御天的眼睛。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2qIRu8246
御天：干嘛蒙住我，我要看，我要看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhfZ4QTbaJH
公子按住千里的脑袋送上香吻一个，千里瞪大着眼睛看着公子妖孽的面容近在咫尺。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm8nn7rgNnM
系统：您的心跳过快，为了您的身体健康，系统将在十秒后强制离线，现在开始倒计时，十，九……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxWyDSczHF
于是只见白光一闪，千里从酒馆消失了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZck4hvBAsD
公子：切，怂货。小雷~再来两杯酒。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiembj9qEMd
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡat9x0RwJKL
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0GgtC2OnQ
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiyn0T3rP0
3、和漂流一起做任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2F4R9EQy9j
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjqxhtkwm5d
御天：为什么这个家伙会在这里！！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKQIw08CZOf
剑鬼：咳，漂流是过来帮忙做任务的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡugWIl4U72Q
御天：强烈要求把这个家伙踢出队伍！他一定是来当奸细的！奸细！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡosegLccU9R
剑鬼：好了，我们来谈一下这次任务怎么分配。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiEVWHS2jW
御天：……QAQ（被坐在旁边的漂流微笑着顺毛）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wnpb7Rvjx
公子：这一次的任务是千里弄来的，啧，又是一个越级的奇葩任务，线索也不是很明确。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4UNFzneIc
千里：嘿嘿。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi71et2DASW
公子：首先是主城沙漠古城的北部有一个教堂废墟，根据任务提示，里面应该会有线索。剑鬼和千里去那边调查一下，随时在频道里报告情况。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88VxM0KupD
千里&剑鬼：好。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2elqPmCMz
公子：接着是所谓城外有关海市蜃楼的传言，那是我们最终要去的地方。佑哥和战无伤一起去打探一下，找一下有没有入口。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxmB7C4E29
佑哥：包在我身上了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IfDnTnCUE
公子：然后是那个强盗寨子，剩下还有谁？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAllJuXH19
御天：我，我。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡInK8jkq8sJ
公子：嗯，那你和漂流一起去打探一下情况。左手也去，右手和我留在城里做接应。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdfRGIkZjp
御天：我反对！我不要和这个家伙一起行动！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8eLimlY7lh
公子：反对无效，你能自己找到寨子的位置吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZc9CO7azPq
御天：……QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡired6XTzfx
公子：好了，那就出发吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzaKZNvz66S
公子掏出卷轴，白光一闪，众人便从小雷酒馆里消失了，随后九个人便一起出现在了主城沙漠古城里。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmbkVYWXpP
御天：公子，可不可以我和佑哥去查海市蜃楼，战无伤跟着你，让右手和那家伙去寨子，反正他们三个人经常一起行动。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgW1bZCEAX
战无伤：我去！我难得一次不当保镖我容易吗，别跟我抢啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPDqM26iZsD
公子：漂流他们都看不到佣兵团频道，联络起来不方便。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3pkd344Dcm
御天：那，那我就跟战无伤换，让战无伤跟着那家伙好了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvaw9sCarjz
佑哥：别啊，带你去，到时候我是找入口还是找你啊……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1S3iKIsBgH
御天：……QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUD2RYQIo8k
于是漂流开开心心地搂着呆滞中的御天出发了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2PSy3tFIi
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsWJXkFJ9oD
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZpSmmpmkG
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1lRI2ATwK
4、和漂流一起埋伏。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl47zUK7xmg
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqAmjN82bC
御天：……我们为什么要在草堆里埋伏……我们不是来跟NPC打探消息的吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeJuHfIbZf
漂流：这里的NPC比较特殊，都是强盗，指不定一见面就直接化身开怪，所以我们要先观察一下。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxamy8r2GnP
御天：那左手为什么不来埋伏？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqWaSO8BC4
漂流：全部都埋伏了，就没有人和NPC说话了啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGtARLx30He
御天：我可以去，你和左手埋伏观察好了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjocKSb13Pd
漂流：可是那样的话我会不放心啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBq0g8NGBA
御天：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9YrDtwFNE
左手和第一个NPC说话，没有被砍。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRCa7YCoV2
御天：好像没什么危险，要么我们也出去吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe8gZE8x0p
漂流：不好说，等等再看看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW25UP4ZXrH
左手和第二个NPC说话，还是没有被砍。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9ph9GyfHs
御天：好像真没什么危险，我说你是不是太胆小了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjg9eXEctF
漂流：不是胆小是谨慎。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfbI3b5oIks
左手和第三个NPC说话，依旧没有被砍。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WHoPEWmfC
御天：好像真……………………TMD你在摸哪儿！你敢吃我豆腐！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6RyCCpBTa
漂流：我只是怕你蹲久了身子麻，帮你揉一揉。乖~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MmKPA7hun
御天：滚！蹲久了也用不着揉【哗——】啊！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmculTGC8es
（佣兵团频道内）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGbcQYUdLmO
御天：我抗议！我正在被那个家伙性骚扰！QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rSoDi2w55
众人：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObGEEHKfqp
公子：啧，漂流眼光真差。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMGfNYHJcq
千里：就是。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgj592UjCqw
众人：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMPUoAOxqc
御天：靠！你们这对狗男男。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRr5fYsuiJ
御天决定自救，遂掏出家伙对着漂流。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkVP6TLw5w
御天：信不信我现在就砍了你。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOJZql7lMF
漂流：距离太近了，你射不到我的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiO51n0VSH
御天：靠！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCXe46xjtd
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBHAENvCSr
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6kv63mRyWs
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lYba78Mfg
5、又到了一年一度的情人节，游戏里也举办了活动。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc9B07dJlQA
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimcF1VlEDC
剑鬼：系统通知都收到了吗？情人节貌似有特殊任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcandFLs5ON
战无伤：情人节任务关你什么事，你连对象都没有。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9deXdtYXkM
剑鬼：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbPthOXuUlg
佑哥：根据我的情报，貌似也不是只有情侣才能做任务，还有单身的任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB0Lmyori7g
御天：啧，你们这群光棍就去做光棍任务吧，我去找葡萄妹子陪我做情侣任务，哈哈。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOR2Obukpv
众人：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm4NQKSJLU
御天欢天喜地地奔去找葡萄妹子了，剩下的三人结伴来到街上，打算去接任务。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzwlIFC0Vn
剑鬼：任务怎么接？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWjv2DlPlF
佑哥：听说是找城里的NPC接，具体还没有打听到，但听说一看就明白。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQaxe7jzkA
战无伤：是指那个吗？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1t9PnUfyQI
战无伤指着不远处一排卫兵，只是与平时不同的是，几乎每个卫兵头上都戴着一个写着“死”字的头巾。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAe6G0LxptG
佑哥：大概……走过去看看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXQHA6lZot
三人走到一个戴着“死”字头巾的卫兵面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzzM3WquQqy
剑鬼：情人节任务怎么接？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡplNeYTpgzA
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！拿好这根火柴，去烧掉10对“隐秘的情侣”就可以成为我们的高级团员，我在这里等你消息。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5YpfkZAVu
系统：是否接收道具“光棍之棍”？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkumdXYGJnl
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5LN0eqsL4X
战无伤：怎么样怎么样，我看卫兵好像给了你个什么东西？武器？加什么的？啧，一上来就发东西，真大方啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBhG2xiwpyo
剑鬼：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1qgG9YsiW
战无伤：嘿嘿，我也去领一个，你们等着。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxKAd7CzlX
过了一会儿，战无伤领好任务回来了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XPj3G0wWj
战无伤：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZR2IrsdObK
过了一会儿，佑哥也领好任务回来了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccrR10mmzP
佑哥：擦！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4nO5aeGO1
剑鬼：不知道没有带头巾的卫兵有什么区别？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxcOjYWpzkz
佑哥：再去试试看呗。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrTYevSr5U
三人走到没有带头巾的卫兵面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTWX1xxemE
剑鬼：情人节任务……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJvb0NIClIo
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……咦？你是去死去死团的！！不要烧我啊！我没有女朋友！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEv1gflYrz3
剑鬼：……什么乱七八糟的东西。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsn89VzL0vb
（与此同时，同城的另一个角落）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttDZCfQg7I
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……你们看，我连礼物都买好了，是她一直想要的项链，你们可不可以帮我送去给她？这对戒指就当做酬劳送给你们好了，上次买来被她嫌弃难看。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK8s2NruYTN
系统：是否接收道具“情侣戒指”？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8DjUKlVg9O
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLBnVjhMpAB
剑鬼&佑哥&战无伤千辛万苦终于烧完情侣回来了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTFFE6sUTZ
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！干得好，你们真是去死去死团的楷模！这个礼盒是成为高级团员的奖品，里面的东西你应该用得上。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3tigNAR2jg
三人打开礼盒后，发现都是自己职业用得上的装备。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZvd4GRCww
佑哥：还真是普通的奖品啊，不过属性还不错。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpIVjB6e1q
剑鬼：我这个没什么用，还没有我现在用的那个属性好。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXf0f7KviW
战无伤：奖品算什么，烧情侣才是重点。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKy3S5lJHx
佑哥&剑鬼：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmhqzM8G7n
这时，三人突然看见御天气势汹汹地从远处走过来。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMy8zfOtGPz
佑哥：哎，御天，情侣任务的奖品是什么啊？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjhxaBn8Vx
御天：…………………………漂流在哪里！！让我烧了他！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNEiqzrnht
然后御天又气势汹汹地踩踏着红尘滚滚地离开了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj14OgtmBrI
佑哥：御天怎么了？吃火药了？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeXbzhf74FU
公子：他只是被漂流坑了，不能和葡萄一起做情侣任务了而已。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20PXHlqKWO
佑哥：这样哦。哎哎？公子你来了？咦？千里也在。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHy9fv5RYwD
公子：想知道情侣任务的奖品？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg57UdcTJl3
佑哥：是呀，是呀，公子你知道。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡczmZwpr4mQ
公子：就是这么个玩意儿。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdkNVUubnMT
公子从衣服里掏出了一枚戒指，随意地扔在众人面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3UbuxYsbYw
佑哥：我看看。情侣戒指，任务物品，不可交易，火法抗性+20%！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBW75XU7KLP
剑鬼：数值挺高的啊。不过火法抗性对你没什么用吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwHqSVUXq0
公子：活动的噱头而已。一开始发任务时候就给的，任务完成后可以永久持有。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxVwkftJpfJ
战无伤：等等！公子你和谁一起做的任务！难道是去重生紫晶借的妹子！这样的好事怎么不叫上我啊。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOItIohkSe
公子：和千里做的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJsfkhLbPF
战无伤：原来是和千里做的啊……神马！和千里！男人也行！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY85taLOQ4m
公子：谁跟你们说过情侣任务只能男女做。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ch626S4YH
战无伤：靠！无耻！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrlwwcItf0
（N个城外的某个角落）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLRju6HG0I
漂流：我说，你总是这么追杀我，我都没法去找那个谁的女朋友了，任务完成不了对我们谁都没好处。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dvCV72AOc
御天：去死吧！谁要跟你完成情侣任务！完成不了最好！去死去死去死！！！！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe61Ko0ouey
漂流：都说了这么近你射不到我的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KY9cvQ43p
御天：那就滚远点！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRBImaZGnV
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUaO6fQ7Yv
* 补充：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIPjxm7wr3Q
如果不是两个人去找非去死去死团的NPC：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzZpQzsHqn
卫兵：哎哎，明明是情人节，我却要在这里值班，我都已经和女朋友约好了，却临时放她鸽子，不知道会不会被讨厌……对啦，我有女朋友的事情可不要跟我旁边的兄弟说，他们是去死去死团的，我怕我会被烧掉。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTHA5gd8UFP
如果领好了情侣任务再去找去死去死团NPC：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtYrf0wck08
卫兵：啊啊啊啊啊！！伟大的去死去死团欢迎你！！神马！你们是情侣！烧掉！！（受到卫兵火法攻击，不过情侣戒指的火法抗性针对该NPC是100%的，记得带好就不会挂。）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5zqbQo1tdD
关于情侣任务里的卫兵的女朋友：61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9erDKKSo8U
看起来貌似找到就可以了，不过其实是个boss需要打一打。把项链交给女朋友后，女朋友会很快注意到情侣玩家身上携带的情侣戒指。虽然是自己曾经嫌弃的东西，但是看到戴在别人的身上依旧会暴走。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1gta5QWDv
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMPniHNUdy
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ414U4dsG9A
6、佑哥在练级区泡到一个妹子。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNmF8Dp4yc
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOq5b9uwO8
妹子：哎？你真的是佑哥？那个无所不知的佑哥？（星星眼）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqSXhJZ82P
佑哥：是啊，你有什么想知道的尽管问我。（自豪状）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBfnTSZ9oa
妹子：那你快告诉我双鬼谁攻谁受！我纠结这个问题好多年了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDG3UIBxo50
佑哥：额，公子和剑鬼？不是啊，公子和千里才是一对。咦？妹子你要去哪里？等等我呗〜61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSEbxGCIiY
妹子：小晴！我的CP被拆了！酒鬼大大居然跟那个叫千里一醉的是一对！我的双鬼啊！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmms8sqPb4h
小晴：哦，我无所谓啦，反正我是公子总受派的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRlOSpnJZV
佑哥：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5yJ7a2Qpcw
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuQ9eY5Mem
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7SFMCcxR3
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQAJPCWE2S0
7、有一天，御天在三次元里碰到了漂流。（私设）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2DJf2tQ2O
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhK265io1wN
御天：QAQ61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88UF0t9QLX
战无伤：怎么了？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPEeU3PUIjb
御天：我今天遇到漂流了。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2adVnYoEf
战无伤：你不是天天都遇到他么。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOoRM7y1J3V
御天：不是说游戏里，是在电梯里遇到的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgdEq5QD5SM
战无伤：哪儿的电梯？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwOE1Qe6g7j
御天：家里的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBNWcv8y6Ky
战无伤：哟，你们还是邻居啊？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EUUKw2cvj
御天：对啊，我也不想的！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv57M9ORD5M
战无伤：[蜡烛]61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzxMJ9xF8a
（过了几天）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4D5mRFX6G
御天：漂流你给我滚出来！有种你跟我单挑！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWi3Qii1wu
战无伤：他又怎么你了？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxR3kwKnja0
御天：他守我电梯！现在每天都得跟他搭同一部电梯下楼，真是生不如死！61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNj6Bw6So06
战无伤：[蜡烛]61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhGxcoH8Vj0
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrU7fPgEEMU
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2J6zi8gpJ
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0F6v0DItp
8、小雷又研究出了新的酒。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjP6jRJGph
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpfasRKZal
小雷：公子，这是我新弄的酒，系统酒馆都没得卖呢。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKf4IZzKse
公子：哦？不错，来一杯尝尝。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Kf6OFm7MX
于是小雷很开心地跑进去把新酒端了上来，然后小心翼翼地看着公子品尝。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjiJtZPSWR
小雷：怎么样？还不错吧。我觉得公子会比较喜欢这种口感，所以特地配的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhJLRNlMan
公子：嗯，不错，知我者小雷也。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8OBZyEj5n
小雷：嗯嗯。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmmjnErsLp
公子：小雷，我突然发现，你才是我生命中最重要的人。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN2GRiF0UBZ
小雷：公子！（泪花闪闪感动状）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCGr28t9Q8
公子：小雷！（泪花闪闪感动状）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6q2xUYXIKQ
千里突然有了深深的危机感。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcl3pZLst7
佑哥：嘿嘿，新酒不错啊，小雷也给我们上一份吧。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLE6qd3FuI
小雷：你们？哦，做这个酒挺费时间的，我做了好几天才做出几杯，都要留着给公子呢。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDh89b926Fu
佑哥：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWq24nsLOb
小雷：不过倒是可以给你们喝点别的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFnZtaPC3k
过了一会儿，小雷又端上来几份不属于系统酒的不明液体，一人一杯地放在众人的面前。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRC0G3Bd372
佑哥：……这是啥？61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCXLjB6blC
小雷：研究过程中的副产品，看在你们是公子的朋友的份上就免费给你们喝好了。用的材料也很贵，倒掉怪浪费的。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3gKj8uthS
佑哥：……61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMPoPZA1gdD
众人突然有了深深的危机感。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzELJ9hn46
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsv0AvOWwb
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FREETALK61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6RowpmMil2
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxj3MUGtGKo
感谢收养这份……没什么意义的段子集XD。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88RPviV2KD
看完近战以后就很HAPPY地各种脑补，并弃无数坑于不顾地来写近战的段子。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKhPvmJxew
近战里一直很很很很很喜欢漂流，直到他黑掉，我惊悚脸啊！御天也非常可爱，每次碰到漂流都一副炸毛的样子，我于是便当机立断这是一对XD（神马逻辑！）。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gT9xlaP5r
韩家公子也是我超喜欢的类型，智慧型美男啊~~~~~然后每次公子指点江山，我都会很YY地想着，公子你果然不愧是贤内助。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpA9nKn1SzS
然后是御天和战无伤，万年泡妞无果二人组，这两个人一老一少一搭一唱总觉得也很有意思~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5kE8YawPW
剑鬼是最最最正直的真汉子！所以脑补他每次被众人的各种欢脱弄得无语到麻木，于是笑而不语。61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5f7Zv49JR
至于佑哥的话，情报王嘛~ 情报=八卦（不对！）61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYC2yNLJ6B4
总之，如果以后还有机会也会在写近战的段子~欢迎大家来我微博或者博客上看哦~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1PHI8tfN9
以上~61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYqXSnByHXD
61Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNO8kVolem
2013年11月
