ALTERNATE UNIVERSE is an album I wrote in early 2024 in response to the way men have treated me as a receptacle throughout my life. That experience is at its core, but the album also explores lust from two conflicting perspectives: one that rejects hookup culture and one that constantly craves it - imagining myself in both roles, in an alternate universe. A piece that embodies this contrast is Interdimensional Urges, which reflects on the decline of domesticity in a relationship from both sides.

The title, ALTERNATE UNIVERSE, comes from the piece of the same name, which was inspired by a short-lived, fling-like relationship I wished had evolved into something more. That longing, that desire for an alternate outcome, shaped the album’s concept: taking real situations from my own experience and playing them out through different characters - sometimes hinting at change, sometimes rewriting the ending entirely.

This album was pre-poetic Rebel, but still written during a phase of poetic curiosity. The pieces are more song-like than poem-like, making them more accessible while still serving the album’s purpose - something deeply personal yet open for others to find meaning in, even if its themes are niche. These include catfishing (God You Want), body dysmorphia (Signature Move), and coming out guidance (Best Advice).

Ultimately, ALTERNATE UNIVERSE was the first album I wrote with a clear concept in mind, and it will be the only album I share that predates FIEFDOM FALL. I hope you enjoy shifting perspectives through these pieces, all centered around the age-old question: what if? Writing this challenged me to see things from different angles - I hope it challenges you too.

FIEFDOM FALL is an album I’m immensely proud of creating, especially considering the period in which it was made. I started working on the concept in July 2024, after writing the first piece, Passion of The Cut Sleeve, about my boyfriend at the time - the day before we broke up. That piece became the catalyst for the album, leading me to write mostly about my childhood trauma as a way to process it.

The title, FIEFDOM FALL, comes from the second piece on the album, Filial Piety, which I wrote to make sense of my feelings toward my parents. To me, FIEFDOM FALL represents the destruction of a belief system, both internally and externally. Internally, I changed in December when my family from New Zealand came to visit. I noticed myself becoming more assertive, mirroring the confidence I saw in their tourist behaviors. This confidence was new to me - I realized how much of my personality I had kept hidden, likely because I associated it with my queerness and, in turn, suppressed both. The external change is mostly about how others perceive things, as explored in Rue You, where I wrote from the perspective of a character who both adores and is repelled by someone. In a way, that push-and-pull dynamic mirrors how outside forces shaped my own relationships and self-perception.

FIEFDOM FALL is also deeply poetic, which is something I’ve always strived for - poetry within lyrics. It doesn’t always adhere to traditional song structures, much like queerness itself isn’t always seen as mainstream. The poetic style feels especially fitting given how personal the album is to my experiences with sexuality and identity. In some ways, the poetry acts as a veil, masking the full truth beneath flowery - or in this case, Chinese - imagery.

And that’s what this album encapsulates. I hope you can identify with these struggles I’ve carried for years - struggles that are ultimately human: jealousy (Shaded Jade), heartbreak (I Don’t Think), baby fever (Antinomy), and more. But even if you don’t relate to anything I’ve said, I hope you can still enjoy the experience of stepping into the shoes of a queer artist navigating life.