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秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBXKCVrwnpM
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjC57sMT8Q7
「完好？」現在的她問。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQFm0848mOp
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTv450xr5a2
「無缺？」曾經的他問。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4Hguimdxu
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrob9D06NB8
很多人說他生活美滿。家境富裕，頭腦聰明，五官英氣，身材高大。聞言他總是假笑，笑對方客氣得過份。奈何對方從未察覺他的笑容雖假，情感卻是真實而強烈的：他的確認為對方很過份。他想要的從不是這種生活，可惜每次對此表示厭棄時，總有人批評他不知足。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xqufY8JYg
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyAW5XsnpUp
輕嘆一聲，繼續前行。踏踏踏，沙沙沙，聲聲撕心裂肺。像父母的哭罵，令人痛，也令人愧疚不安。無論他們如何呼天搶地，他終究永遠不會回來。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWX4AxjniK
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3zEIKPI1hJ
遷入新居，展開新生。吃力，困難。已然表達得很清楚，對方還是假裝不知該使用哪個稱謂。有人說不介意，有人說很平常，話題和目光卻只停留在胯下之物。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqkvzPj7Vs
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6T2nV4gHUZ
無處訴說的孤獨日夜縈繞不散。曾發誓永不後悔，曾以為自己是多麼堅毅勇敢，曾相信世界其實不是那麼單一而絕情……159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOB46dkdzv
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ZzwRgQnNf
步出公園，拐了幾個街口，來到醫院門前。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KSGSbLwDX
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMDO6rkSJwo
「醫生，早晨。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCu6yDLIdh
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZzqpSaDwO
「早晨。近來身體好嗎？」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRZNkAlLrb
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3aOumY2Yp
「好……不過……」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzztj8etRr
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡji8sUwntLd
「不過甚麼？」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNxzc64ipch
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1z0G2xw7Jm
「我想再做手術。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUKZqweyMXD
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7L0clgEvoF
「為甚麼？」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbM6HZPXuCF
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfkeRxUnU7N
「不適應現在的生活。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9kh89n01I
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jbCChYnCO
「不適應身體的變化或是有其他困難？」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOC0SOviINp
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbvG3U9AtJ
「是生活上的困難……其實我很滿意現在的身體，我覺得這才是真正的自己！過往的我根本不是我！可惜旁人都不是這麼認為……」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJCGhUNmek
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt4fPAth4xT
「所以你想要回以前的性別？」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTj84rLgL9X
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMyWbDVcGZ
「不——我是不想要任何性別。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfnHhwJHLli
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDINWqAdZa
「噢……抱歉我還未能捕捉到你的思路。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6gJW62QeqJ
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz3avyARueu
「這些日子，我遇到的問題大都源於旁人無法定徹底認同我是男或女。如果我沒有特定性別，可以在『男』、『女』、『跨性別』、『無性別』幾個類別之間遊走，可能會更自由！」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0THLEOZp7l
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAs6qQIvga
「依我看來，你再次做手術之後，將要面對的問題會更多更嚴重。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4iQOdJBxjs
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFp2eI3VtA
「我理解你的意思，但我還是想要放手一搏——我堅信每次改變都會帶來新的可能、新的希望。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHJbrR9mzA
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYM6PhqJxnl
「既然你堅持，我會按程序寫信轉介你去心理輔導部門作專業評估。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpqP2ygp5ty
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡULVXz7w1tJ
「謝謝你。」159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSnf4q7yIKx
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfREwcxctb
跟醫生多聊一會後，她步出醫院，再次走經公園。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrHSzXRa9H
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfhnZVv5NC7
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyhhB5D7teD
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrg6VOBGTA
「以前未完好。」現在的她說。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslxoVeTuWU
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTywJX5DtiM
「將來會無缺。」曾經的他說。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnGWVCcALAg
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMRHuhQdsk
她笑了，笑自己傻，笑自己依然沉浸在幻想世界當中，相信自己的人生將來一定會變得完好無缺。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO3kJHWINow
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHmC1k4euS
明知無人能斷言明天一定會更好。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwTTSH2NISs
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpSrRxJE6M
奈何人總需要一個努力的原因、一個繼續活下去的原因。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtA4WIrZRFd
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2bpVjeUqto
那個原因名為「希望」。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsqytZy1GAf
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ23lqaCNWD5
「我定要繼續努力。」現在的她說。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHela5eOhBX
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAp2XzlT4ps
「好好活下去吧。」曾經的他說。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKXC67TNAj
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYjWtKkh83K
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsed7ag5B1
159Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3Li5n4sdM
她慢步於公園大道，放眼欣賞沿路風景，不再留意地上的枯葉。
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》
ns3.144.129.165da2
