
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory571Please respect copyright.PENANAfuxniR9686
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 571Please respect copyright.PENANA5Gn9xbUH4O
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.571Please respect copyright.PENANA7RfydHDKMM
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?571Please respect copyright.PENANAEVdAKZ3qwn
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.571Please respect copyright.PENANArC9qBxUEdk
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.571Please respect copyright.PENANAuJ2aThBHIj
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.571Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9HWB2Fa64
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.571Please respect copyright.PENANAXhqzGkLGBk
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?571Please respect copyright.PENANA0s9BPhKemq
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.571Please respect copyright.PENANAjgZ6mvNrk4
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.571Please respect copyright.PENANA43NDhQOQIe
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.571Please respect copyright.PENANAe4N29BrOfh
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 571Please respect copyright.PENANAMGkiNaqatC
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.571Please respect copyright.PENANAz10cmvDvYP
girl bestie? - coco <3571Please respect copyright.PENANAzFbbPwdQjE
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.571Please respect copyright.PENANA9gABIkhVut
age? - seven years old.571Please respect copyright.PENANAStd1HxvF8j
last person i texted? - idfk.571Please respect copyright.PENANAVeY0FKITxS
last person i called? - probably my little brother.571Please respect copyright.PENANAcyxwHXGBno
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?571Please respect copyright.PENANAqdY0Yp8ncN
random fact? - i like food.571Please respect copyright.PENANAT6Z3ojA0RA
single or taken? - big, fat taken.571Please respect copyright.PENANAOuKa9bzOjW
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.571Please respect copyright.PENANA5fdqdi1FNm
first kiss? - bitch wtf?571Please respect copyright.PENANAEyCutaCGQD
ever smoked? - nope.571Please respect copyright.PENANAv0Of1lx7u0
ever done drugs? - nope~571Please respect copyright.PENANAyYaxa8KSiV
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.571Please respect copyright.PENANAuqSEwn5Z2e
longest relationship? - five and a half months.571Please respect copyright.PENANAsuKNFzTeXt
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.571Please respect copyright.PENANAhPulEWgz5v
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.571Please respect copyright.PENANAEK8rbY1guB
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.571Please respect copyright.PENANAidYUFbUxz4
obsession? - kpop.571Please respect copyright.PENANAb7qWCj2dpW
do you give second chances? - that depends.571Please respect copyright.PENANA1CW0EQNN5b
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?571Please respect copyright.PENANAH4I6CwwoT9
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.571Please respect copyright.PENANAy4KQG2xPt9
day or night? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANAmzxi7Fw0LA
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANAYx0FGXGZL3
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.571Please respect copyright.PENANAT0Doz09Khi
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.571Please respect copyright.PENANA0lUsU1SAjU
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.571Please respect copyright.PENANAStTsFvHXHG
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.571Please respect copyright.PENANAe8uZ95GfkT
favourite movie(s)? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANArtmTI4Uukh
current mood? - bored and tired.571Please respect copyright.PENANA4ffQgPa2Og
jealous of? - a lot of things.571Please respect copyright.PENANAJCVw243QpS
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.571Please respect copyright.PENANARl1UQvCG4E
pets? - two dogs.571Please respect copyright.PENANAfkJeDdKOQl
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.571Please respect copyright.PENANAQmpTgj1f8t
favourite number? - seven.571Please respect copyright.PENANAFs4XpEKk6P
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.571Please respect copyright.PENANAORasiEDqdw
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.571Please respect copyright.PENANAFmhqZUMqP1
afraid of the dark? - yes.571Please respect copyright.PENANAKwKG5v6K2K
one wish? - to be happy for real.571Please respect copyright.PENANArYoPguOxDn
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?571Please respect copyright.PENANAbRcCFYzd45
~571Please respect copyright.PENANA9DUyfnwFJT
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.571Please respect copyright.PENANAP21ZLFQCLP
age? - i'm still seven years old.571Please respect copyright.PENANAd4Hka7Bwts
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.571Please respect copyright.PENANAfegbTB7gac
something you hate about yourself? - my body.571Please respect copyright.PENANAtX4d8au6DT
something you like about yourself? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANAcxH8JXeaU0
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.571Please respect copyright.PENANAiWDaFk9PM4
favourite band? - bts.571Please respect copyright.PENANAhSSMuRcteA
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!571Please respect copyright.PENANAIVwUI8RMbA
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.571Please respect copyright.PENANAaPqf0ycox1
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.571Please respect copyright.PENANA8MRBEVYlKq
girl crush? - emmi.571Please respect copyright.PENANAwnAn5P2DoR
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.571Please respect copyright.PENANAVZ9rfZ4nxL
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^571Please respect copyright.PENANAvqWFLVGzwc
talents? - singing.571Please respect copyright.PENANAplNFPpRWXM
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.571Please respect copyright.PENANAep4ctkNDFZ
someone i love? - emmi.571Please respect copyright.PENANALLshFqJF8B
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.571Please respect copyright.PENANAaFWPuYzttq
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.571Please respect copyright.PENANATtkoBJjtni
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.571Please respect copyright.PENANAesVZGjKcnz
favourite animal? - dogs.571Please respect copyright.PENANAx2SscWxVPq
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 571Please respect copyright.PENANAYFgdLIwfB2
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.571Please respect copyright.PENANAhOEz8NFUob
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.571Please respect copyright.PENANAVfFbzG74JA
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.571Please respect copyright.PENANAC05veod9ln
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.571Please respect copyright.PENANA0YrdE6MNi7
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 571Please respect copyright.PENANAxXHBm4GmAQ
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.571Please respect copyright.PENANARADLclkiDJ
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.571Please respect copyright.PENANAfCrJFqvS0g
~571Please respect copyright.PENANA3WXubCIcVt
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.571Please respect copyright.PENANAwJ8VL2qtmw
country? - i don't live on earth. 571Please respect copyright.PENANAyX6tiFAzPs
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.571Please respect copyright.PENANAj07sNuvsu9
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.571Please respect copyright.PENANAC0wRyBxUvw
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.571Please respect copyright.PENANAR2EOLhxY2d
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.571Please respect copyright.PENANAhrCOVaepE1
country with your favourite accent? - australia.571Please respect copyright.PENANAAoT96pzkyb
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.571Please respect copyright.PENANAK3DoZVplHS
dog or cat person? - both.571Please respect copyright.PENANAFHMgxAsBh0
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.571Please respect copyright.PENANAbberI9tN43
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.571Please respect copyright.PENANAGvQqKPsptS
do you belive in God? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANAhr2cmwEPsv
single or taken? - taken.571Please respect copyright.PENANAM1ozMqlbVx
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*571Please respect copyright.PENANAweoR7zownh
birthday year? - 1930.571Please respect copyright.PENANAk8lzf6zDwM
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.571Please respect copyright.PENANAsFNdhPXCKe
age? - what's that?571Please respect copyright.PENANApEvgVLWdkp
enthinicity? - african american.571Please respect copyright.PENANAIcaWXVZD3f
tea or coffee? - neither.571Please respect copyright.PENANA90PMxpPGCb
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.571Please respect copyright.PENANAs0Xxb0CnUl
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*571Please respect copyright.PENANAWj3Hfl8Tl1
favourite food? - ice cream.571Please respect copyright.PENANAlJAJEQseoI
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 571Please respect copyright.PENANAfN40ogbs5W
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.571Please respect copyright.PENANAiLtPPWPmA8
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.571Please respect copyright.PENANAhppmTTehS2
favourite soda? - sprite.571Please respect copyright.PENANABkOsIclRdA
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.571Please respect copyright.PENANAbdmoboI4E2
can you swim? - yes, wtf?571Please respect copyright.PENANAXZ0dtjlUO4
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.571Please respect copyright.PENANAuQBt1H0v04
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.571Please respect copyright.PENANA7jXfV9Zhwb
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.571Please respect copyright.PENANAasIEIidxuI
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.571Please respect copyright.PENANAJTjMW3AjDh
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*571Please respect copyright.PENANAw3zj9gQXOw
apple or andriod? - apple.571Please respect copyright.PENANATbot4P5LFK
best dessert? - mochi.571Please respect copyright.PENANAJViqVUTt7S
~571Please respect copyright.PENANAsdUqYEWb0r
have you ever:571Please respect copyright.PENANAQ6xR2bvXT2
1. skipped class? - yes.571Please respect copyright.PENANAqWzT7JC24h
2. done drugs? - no.571Please respect copyright.PENANAFAza0nmuiD
3. self-harmed? - yes.571Please respect copyright.PENANA6CpXK7zYpP
4. drank? - no.571Please respect copyright.PENANAqDo8MSkHhT
5. shoplifted? - yes.571Please respect copyright.PENANA8x6J2pjIk3
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.571Please respect copyright.PENANAMl0M8KHuzl
7. broken up with someone? - yes.571Please respect copyright.PENANAFCtyWEbS37
what's your favourite:571Please respect copyright.PENANAuo00qcEB1M
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.571Please respect copyright.PENANAi103qxWF1c
9. movie? - break the silence.571Please respect copyright.PENANAuYAFH4wGwS
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.571Please respect copyright.PENANAJz9Z44eErs
11. artist? - bts.571Please respect copyright.PENANAxJq7VJpHuq
12. singer or band? - bts.571Please respect copyright.PENANAjpAlZw57jR
13. memory? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANAdPEYRvNzyV
14. book? - the cruel prince.571Please respect copyright.PENANAXevZCMk6yI
this or that:571Please respect copyright.PENANAgdu7VXOGX5
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.571Please respect copyright.PENANA0AHVeo3foJ
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.571Please respect copyright.PENANANCSxrra3LN
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.571Please respect copyright.PENANAMbVELSukXX
18. movies or books? - idk.571Please respect copyright.PENANA7grJA0TirZ
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.571Please respect copyright.PENANAcnjuBB0T8X
20. blind of deaf? - blind.571Please respect copyright.PENANAbImpc3OguP
21. tea or coffee? - neither.571Please respect copyright.PENANA2FbpG1Kf25
what's your:571Please respect copyright.PENANAYHROrDpIAz
22. age? - ninety-one.571Please respect copyright.PENANAYJFO6fV7Qj
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.571Please respect copyright.PENANA1Ge4LkSYLm
24. height? - 4'11.571Please respect copyright.PENANAVwyERrPJgx
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.571Please respect copyright.PENANArDpaCKL9ia
26. shoe size? - seven.571Please respect copyright.PENANAmWFOsqHACP
27. religion? - i'm not religious.571Please respect copyright.PENANA6wWx3XG6xw
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.571Please respect copyright.PENANALrFhyqnBNb
opinion on: 571Please respect copyright.PENANAiDE2t0f9wk
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...571Please respect copyright.PENANATuzI9HTBV1
30. second chances? - it depends.571Please respect copyright.PENANAXnOzoNoUjG
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.571Please respect copyright.PENANAAae5DqMWEI
32. abortion? - ew.571Please respect copyright.PENANAlGgV8rMRi9
33. a death penalty? - ew.571Please respect copyright.PENANAqBepSWJVJl
34. marijuana? - i likes that.571Please respect copyright.PENANAgIzJAjtJ3i
35. love? - what's love?571Please respect copyright.PENANA20Jz9jZF4M
do you:571Please respect copyright.PENANABgBLcFbEy2
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.571Please respect copyright.PENANA2egyZp9Ifg
571Please respect copyright.PENANAy9f3I7ZNjB
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3571Please respect copyright.PENANAMAMGwRYJkc