
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory509Please respect copyright.PENANAY2N6mtC2Wg
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 509Please respect copyright.PENANABUztzGBnHv
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.509Please respect copyright.PENANAsiUAm0Izmc
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?509Please respect copyright.PENANABYQhxeYnUs
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.509Please respect copyright.PENANAsNKWSsHZAk
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.509Please respect copyright.PENANAYsHg7V1t05
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.509Please respect copyright.PENANAxC85c80XJw
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.509Please respect copyright.PENANAd8usU1wm0l
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?509Please respect copyright.PENANAtGjDBZepRL
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.509Please respect copyright.PENANAiTLJ4Qi6st
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.509Please respect copyright.PENANAifWCJshtct
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.509Please respect copyright.PENANA3ykucV72H4
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 509Please respect copyright.PENANA8D2MDlMotP
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.509Please respect copyright.PENANAYSDj6jA4SI
girl bestie? - coco <3509Please respect copyright.PENANAuCi8FvMLjJ
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.509Please respect copyright.PENANAUIOTTCzoCn
age? - seven years old.509Please respect copyright.PENANA5R5mCsXbkf
last person i texted? - idfk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAUJvHgntD7Y
last person i called? - probably my little brother.509Please respect copyright.PENANAe9WEZrkEd8
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?509Please respect copyright.PENANAYdRioZHRMh
random fact? - i like food.509Please respect copyright.PENANAIdd5ehGrbD
single or taken? - big, fat taken.509Please respect copyright.PENANAckeLVEwIkA
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.509Please respect copyright.PENANAmRxwYCsC7t
first kiss? - bitch wtf?509Please respect copyright.PENANAmVcbrMhsyp
ever smoked? - nope.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMoNBbTDIPD
ever done drugs? - nope~509Please respect copyright.PENANA5eK2pLCkTl
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.509Please respect copyright.PENANAScyFRuSAmZ
longest relationship? - five and a half months.509Please respect copyright.PENANAuZMlSHAg2o
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.509Please respect copyright.PENANAekX7FAJbuQ
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.509Please respect copyright.PENANAE7cvarpdKW
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.509Please respect copyright.PENANA7ayxIGtvbz
obsession? - kpop.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgsxjpvDZZf
do you give second chances? - that depends.509Please respect copyright.PENANAnDX2FQJQa5
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?509Please respect copyright.PENANAwEcwgp8CYp
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.509Please respect copyright.PENANAtvoGZd5sWg
day or night? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAzX6yUpzyue
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAmBRow3xlMe
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.509Please respect copyright.PENANAO6TwOJj03u
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.509Please respect copyright.PENANAHKBzehFVZJ
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.509Please respect copyright.PENANArucrdzQ9Xf
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.509Please respect copyright.PENANAnAc1EO2fSv
favourite movie(s)? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAPm7hXjowkQ
current mood? - bored and tired.509Please respect copyright.PENANAuLucA6ZCK1
jealous of? - a lot of things.509Please respect copyright.PENANAv0Jz0maehk
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.509Please respect copyright.PENANA5M4Vwl5sPg
pets? - two dogs.509Please respect copyright.PENANASW0OdeJRwW
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.509Please respect copyright.PENANAPl5NeBPm3P
favourite number? - seven.509Please respect copyright.PENANAUX1qOIRlD3
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.509Please respect copyright.PENANAwwZioysetp
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.509Please respect copyright.PENANApfHvig70BS
afraid of the dark? - yes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAbO7xLp5QnC
one wish? - to be happy for real.509Please respect copyright.PENANAGP7Gt5GZ9n
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?509Please respect copyright.PENANAIHPgjbe7Mu
~509Please respect copyright.PENANAxQOT546zhI
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.509Please respect copyright.PENANABk62u64Ba6
age? - i'm still seven years old.509Please respect copyright.PENANAYHtLJRx8m3
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.509Please respect copyright.PENANASk5Vf1vOEG
something you hate about yourself? - my body.509Please respect copyright.PENANA2R6bhDWLW3
something you like about yourself? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAjWDUIGdRg0
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.509Please respect copyright.PENANA5tXAFAJYop
favourite band? - bts.509Please respect copyright.PENANA5uwjkwDhYz
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!509Please respect copyright.PENANA9g4c6UP2TS
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.509Please respect copyright.PENANA6Si1uyVyGf
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.509Please respect copyright.PENANAt8MWuUb6IQ
girl crush? - emmi.509Please respect copyright.PENANAJSQqLkRCzK
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.509Please respect copyright.PENANAnAfqMObj3A
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^509Please respect copyright.PENANAfQSHsER5KO
talents? - singing.509Please respect copyright.PENANAGK4AmWkL5v
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.509Please respect copyright.PENANAx8OM7XsSx1
someone i love? - emmi.509Please respect copyright.PENANA7tfc1HouiS
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.509Please respect copyright.PENANAPOr6xYuj7S
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.509Please respect copyright.PENANAVfWtIR7AQZ
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.509Please respect copyright.PENANAGH1W3IJFZD
favourite animal? - dogs.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMaCzvUqmqx
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 509Please respect copyright.PENANAWkQ0IncF8P
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.509Please respect copyright.PENANASKUSYU5m7j
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.509Please respect copyright.PENANAwooajpcSFJ
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.509Please respect copyright.PENANA7b2M2JiGjS
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.509Please respect copyright.PENANA0kdgTkjj2v
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 509Please respect copyright.PENANASRA1IAAXvZ
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.509Please respect copyright.PENANAKGz4PU2TcK
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.509Please respect copyright.PENANA6MRQFYDY6w
~509Please respect copyright.PENANAOIKSuksAOi
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.509Please respect copyright.PENANAo6iJ1oLgc8
country? - i don't live on earth. 509Please respect copyright.PENANACsxetfY2J9
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.509Please respect copyright.PENANABZ8CzUS9mj
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.509Please respect copyright.PENANAOHn894MVBL
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMAMmQSy8Ru
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMmDROTFVhO
country with your favourite accent? - australia.509Please respect copyright.PENANA8UpDfq7pIl
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.509Please respect copyright.PENANAJk1NROmPc3
dog or cat person? - both.509Please respect copyright.PENANAI5ZJ89AVXh
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.509Please respect copyright.PENANAO7Olk6Xk6Q
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.509Please respect copyright.PENANAwsVkWTCfjz
do you belive in God? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANATTEQTIh3Ep
single or taken? - taken.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgTCkVpolY0
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*509Please respect copyright.PENANAJ7cdworCUb
birthday year? - 1930.509Please respect copyright.PENANA3gVEZnYmdQ
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.509Please respect copyright.PENANAY9sFCHkWJA
age? - what's that?509Please respect copyright.PENANAjSNlee9VkR
enthinicity? - african american.509Please respect copyright.PENANAdkSoIA1AW9
tea or coffee? - neither.509Please respect copyright.PENANAe5hqpstqIk
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.509Please respect copyright.PENANAr7c5l0EbmW
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*509Please respect copyright.PENANAfJbbLR9LS4
favourite food? - ice cream.509Please respect copyright.PENANA4IqJZcUt8N
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 509Please respect copyright.PENANAUcWBSJffvt
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAUbAnwF0UE3
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMNUdgwWcSF
favourite soda? - sprite.509Please respect copyright.PENANAVIXNUisJ91
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMpS5622PKj
can you swim? - yes, wtf?509Please respect copyright.PENANAlEFG7xQW29
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.509Please respect copyright.PENANAo5OUhtB1d4
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAHZpOGKJN6D
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.509Please respect copyright.PENANAhcy9WAAPf1
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgsnXfIlXTn
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*509Please respect copyright.PENANARAPZzrdD2V
apple or andriod? - apple.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgPBz3nXNl0
best dessert? - mochi.509Please respect copyright.PENANAwJH8RF666J
~509Please respect copyright.PENANA40X7aTb0La
have you ever:509Please respect copyright.PENANA8d2nMC3jH8
1. skipped class? - yes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAeDk9yFnNQO
2. done drugs? - no.509Please respect copyright.PENANAGiuJuQWLJm
3. self-harmed? - yes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAR36Cyc8Ezy
4. drank? - no.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgL141kZm2T
5. shoplifted? - yes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAMQmgkspUFZ
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.509Please respect copyright.PENANAUhIOx9Wkn6
7. broken up with someone? - yes.509Please respect copyright.PENANAf9q4pzvOMH
what's your favourite:509Please respect copyright.PENANAVT2rn13RVW
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.509Please respect copyright.PENANA1rTF0YCkN8
9. movie? - break the silence.509Please respect copyright.PENANAZ0D8GA4Bvo
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.509Please respect copyright.PENANAKHl3ZMC1kL
11. artist? - bts.509Please respect copyright.PENANAVimloqhUne
12. singer or band? - bts.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgd9QtAp0FU
13. memory? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAPJwVe1X7xX
14. book? - the cruel prince.509Please respect copyright.PENANAWoBImge6tU
this or that:509Please respect copyright.PENANAzDvaRd10O1
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.509Please respect copyright.PENANA5VVT19RvXs
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.509Please respect copyright.PENANAcnlTOaM4ZA
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.509Please respect copyright.PENANAtxubyvIXgc
18. movies or books? - idk.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgdi8WCn71B
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.509Please respect copyright.PENANAbEGocReAdf
20. blind of deaf? - blind.509Please respect copyright.PENANAAyYsdp06Ou
21. tea or coffee? - neither.509Please respect copyright.PENANAX5PG5GTRX0
what's your:509Please respect copyright.PENANALuha0AnL26
22. age? - ninety-one.509Please respect copyright.PENANAO356tSDghA
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.509Please respect copyright.PENANAgvJV58jKJd
24. height? - 4'11.509Please respect copyright.PENANAXXhO9dtKcy
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.509Please respect copyright.PENANAtH3SBEZFbD
26. shoe size? - seven.509Please respect copyright.PENANAPvIzoIGPUY
27. religion? - i'm not religious.509Please respect copyright.PENANAFCvssW47NC
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.509Please respect copyright.PENANAvKwXZi9ztQ
opinion on: 509Please respect copyright.PENANAOm0HHawqr2
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...509Please respect copyright.PENANAKhLLBRIqTI
30. second chances? - it depends.509Please respect copyright.PENANAVFlshwVEui
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.509Please respect copyright.PENANA5pupJ5hDMg
32. abortion? - ew.509Please respect copyright.PENANA4XcGpT2KWG
33. a death penalty? - ew.509Please respect copyright.PENANAWFdWNEzbbT
34. marijuana? - i likes that.509Please respect copyright.PENANAjqZIfbqrMg
35. love? - what's love?509Please respect copyright.PENANAljoyVNEDFH
do you:509Please respect copyright.PENANAhjYW7vn5Ez
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.509Please respect copyright.PENANAvz9zBYcE8x
509Please respect copyright.PENANAXq0SytWw63
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3509Please respect copyright.PENANAaeIl4a88XJ