
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory501Please respect copyright.PENANAuxT1bqAvB5
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 501Please respect copyright.PENANA48Kqbl7PZk
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.501Please respect copyright.PENANAXTAjJRD1kC
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?501Please respect copyright.PENANAvTnn1gOXNX
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.501Please respect copyright.PENANAGhrjniOFRu
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.501Please respect copyright.PENANAQCnbnxSJzJ
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.501Please respect copyright.PENANAlROZD3rbCA
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.501Please respect copyright.PENANA5Ju7Hhn84B
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?501Please respect copyright.PENANA9SOv5RG0Uq
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.501Please respect copyright.PENANAR4tw3KQ5ap
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.501Please respect copyright.PENANApSBTxdH0Io
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.501Please respect copyright.PENANA7fkh16KPBi
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 501Please respect copyright.PENANAOqs2p9MGOp
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.501Please respect copyright.PENANA1dm4Ve387z
girl bestie? - coco <3501Please respect copyright.PENANAIcytZ5vrKP
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.501Please respect copyright.PENANANSPFSAyuL4
age? - seven years old.501Please respect copyright.PENANAV0rTs58XxH
last person i texted? - idfk.501Please respect copyright.PENANAlqNYwPSfXg
last person i called? - probably my little brother.501Please respect copyright.PENANAoJ3uhfkgpB
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?501Please respect copyright.PENANA8GKrCLvpUc
random fact? - i like food.501Please respect copyright.PENANAMQ16hWI2GI
single or taken? - big, fat taken.501Please respect copyright.PENANAyLEqtHXb1e
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.501Please respect copyright.PENANAL9vnfrfc9j
first kiss? - bitch wtf?501Please respect copyright.PENANAkyNNDxPlTS
ever smoked? - nope.501Please respect copyright.PENANAYzidoQOYvM
ever done drugs? - nope~501Please respect copyright.PENANAGWYjfVKMz0
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.501Please respect copyright.PENANAjw6DPoU9nX
longest relationship? - five and a half months.501Please respect copyright.PENANAmKdJVvEzsA
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.501Please respect copyright.PENANALpSSJRKQ60
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.501Please respect copyright.PENANAGhWdhKb6Li
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.501Please respect copyright.PENANAtre0wfzvK5
obsession? - kpop.501Please respect copyright.PENANAfQ22hYvGJ2
do you give second chances? - that depends.501Please respect copyright.PENANAQ7s7hK00Dj
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?501Please respect copyright.PENANAR88oJc85nU
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.501Please respect copyright.PENANAlKGl6d8JnH
day or night? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANAwIpreCGQpa
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANAJL3WVhod4H
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.501Please respect copyright.PENANA1CYBt9muF4
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.501Please respect copyright.PENANAt6y3ocM6iw
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.501Please respect copyright.PENANASaHLSQgWFK
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.501Please respect copyright.PENANAH4XhtjrrnH
favourite movie(s)? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANACE2ewZT0s0
current mood? - bored and tired.501Please respect copyright.PENANA8Gjl4Y3zYh
jealous of? - a lot of things.501Please respect copyright.PENANAAmB2xTzyuI
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.501Please respect copyright.PENANA2CffTwDEwb
pets? - two dogs.501Please respect copyright.PENANAfepacos1Z5
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.501Please respect copyright.PENANAD1t012kkxB
favourite number? - seven.501Please respect copyright.PENANAvj6x4yraNJ
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.501Please respect copyright.PENANAh0HToiyCUg
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.501Please respect copyright.PENANAPdafUZfWOm
afraid of the dark? - yes.501Please respect copyright.PENANAl7JyeCm4Ak
one wish? - to be happy for real.501Please respect copyright.PENANAqE51oywSYN
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?501Please respect copyright.PENANAJdWOlkgcjx
~501Please respect copyright.PENANAPGvZxyRbog
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.501Please respect copyright.PENANA8OQxI6mk9e
age? - i'm still seven years old.501Please respect copyright.PENANAGCzduEqg02
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.501Please respect copyright.PENANArCGfDtMTNc
something you hate about yourself? - my body.501Please respect copyright.PENANAKgtSHjbkbg
something you like about yourself? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANAsWmDCXpXvd
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.501Please respect copyright.PENANAwouqAFRnMi
favourite band? - bts.501Please respect copyright.PENANAXBTpKgRebh
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!501Please respect copyright.PENANAl04eXjc17I
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.501Please respect copyright.PENANAGqfQNJkgR3
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.501Please respect copyright.PENANA2Eek4c6XXj
girl crush? - emmi.501Please respect copyright.PENANATE4wKG6UHg
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.501Please respect copyright.PENANAHz3LJTB4bF
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^501Please respect copyright.PENANAie34rdjJDD
talents? - singing.501Please respect copyright.PENANAVVycUcJnED
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.501Please respect copyright.PENANAhf2bu9DjTl
someone i love? - emmi.501Please respect copyright.PENANA2zCoRpC8lB
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.501Please respect copyright.PENANA1rf4B47La5
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.501Please respect copyright.PENANARfabQ42Da8
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.501Please respect copyright.PENANANaH7kBXr8m
favourite animal? - dogs.501Please respect copyright.PENANAawyQFKBsvm
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 501Please respect copyright.PENANAYUjhuZ9iXr
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.501Please respect copyright.PENANA7cDWf6RVzJ
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.501Please respect copyright.PENANAQm1S8onq4T
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.501Please respect copyright.PENANAnOXyBaQpbH
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.501Please respect copyright.PENANAMNjKLZTqZw
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 501Please respect copyright.PENANAiM87xKsKyw
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.501Please respect copyright.PENANAjPDOVwXOkV
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.501Please respect copyright.PENANAcwjyokO77s
~501Please respect copyright.PENANATLEWLTF7Ex
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.501Please respect copyright.PENANAq3LOaJPuIR
country? - i don't live on earth. 501Please respect copyright.PENANAQs9Ekb6Yci
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.501Please respect copyright.PENANADjoc1VDlXC
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.501Please respect copyright.PENANApFV0FZG95Y
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.501Please respect copyright.PENANAyQEiSX8loM
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.501Please respect copyright.PENANA01HWB40W4I
country with your favourite accent? - australia.501Please respect copyright.PENANA6grSSkZERd
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.501Please respect copyright.PENANA0EhArHnjmC
dog or cat person? - both.501Please respect copyright.PENANAG25W5YD0eY
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.501Please respect copyright.PENANApFf2KEejfP
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.501Please respect copyright.PENANAiO6udogfyo
do you belive in God? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANA9ox625y8Sh
single or taken? - taken.501Please respect copyright.PENANAxW1B1lnvlF
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*501Please respect copyright.PENANAFQG9xTlVPt
birthday year? - 1930.501Please respect copyright.PENANAKIjhj1jqnL
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.501Please respect copyright.PENANAFunWnTs3gx
age? - what's that?501Please respect copyright.PENANAEG7GssfHJg
enthinicity? - african american.501Please respect copyright.PENANArZrBpzG31K
tea or coffee? - neither.501Please respect copyright.PENANA6Cw18XG0AN
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.501Please respect copyright.PENANApndlS5gfXh
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*501Please respect copyright.PENANAjdx50NqKZd
favourite food? - ice cream.501Please respect copyright.PENANAch9hutYB3B
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 501Please respect copyright.PENANALxzrTaOX9x
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.501Please respect copyright.PENANAUXciBesrPm
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.501Please respect copyright.PENANAvOTpyoXXtD
favourite soda? - sprite.501Please respect copyright.PENANAmZDUX3JXvO
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.501Please respect copyright.PENANArVBNgupIdf
can you swim? - yes, wtf?501Please respect copyright.PENANAKIalpoI1SR
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.501Please respect copyright.PENANARRQ5trVRjF
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.501Please respect copyright.PENANA7Q2GSL6g3y
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.501Please respect copyright.PENANAMK09cXA5vf
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.501Please respect copyright.PENANAvwKGe9obkS
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*501Please respect copyright.PENANA87Ya4neHzP
apple or andriod? - apple.501Please respect copyright.PENANAxVGWWbGiPi
best dessert? - mochi.501Please respect copyright.PENANAfOhaabP30j
~501Please respect copyright.PENANAvSVSnSpqJk
have you ever:501Please respect copyright.PENANAmP96QCc5vz
1. skipped class? - yes.501Please respect copyright.PENANA8UdO50I2cS
2. done drugs? - no.501Please respect copyright.PENANAR3IYeg0r3T
3. self-harmed? - yes.501Please respect copyright.PENANANcHOaBhgHf
4. drank? - no.501Please respect copyright.PENANA9suYd5zYV1
5. shoplifted? - yes.501Please respect copyright.PENANAF1Bjy8Cct2
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.501Please respect copyright.PENANAU2Tq9MBVhM
7. broken up with someone? - yes.501Please respect copyright.PENANAFperAPbbTE
what's your favourite:501Please respect copyright.PENANAQzhI7PxS1V
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.501Please respect copyright.PENANAjVi3m2DPSa
9. movie? - break the silence.501Please respect copyright.PENANASpKLYeJjWB
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.501Please respect copyright.PENANAUryGrKAWmR
11. artist? - bts.501Please respect copyright.PENANAKdzrz37zKQ
12. singer or band? - bts.501Please respect copyright.PENANAKKZ11WqoI5
13. memory? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANAWbAeyYoIb0
14. book? - the cruel prince.501Please respect copyright.PENANAExiqm3sf0i
this or that:501Please respect copyright.PENANAaV79hKPyvv
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.501Please respect copyright.PENANA0BXKkZpyKx
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.501Please respect copyright.PENANAh7ewRUvHKK
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.501Please respect copyright.PENANAZZ6famkVNK
18. movies or books? - idk.501Please respect copyright.PENANASKTW4cgQPw
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.501Please respect copyright.PENANA8mhojTwNu5
20. blind of deaf? - blind.501Please respect copyright.PENANAJWkcHFl8tH
21. tea or coffee? - neither.501Please respect copyright.PENANA9B6bBZpveM
what's your:501Please respect copyright.PENANA4WTSNB0gOZ
22. age? - ninety-one.501Please respect copyright.PENANACbg3cB5U5M
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.501Please respect copyright.PENANAY5tNsR8T3i
24. height? - 4'11.501Please respect copyright.PENANAE9wvNDLcuF
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.501Please respect copyright.PENANAP1hMFGiFHW
26. shoe size? - seven.501Please respect copyright.PENANAmtn6SjxbKZ
27. religion? - i'm not religious.501Please respect copyright.PENANANxD0u2GJLn
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.501Please respect copyright.PENANAc8egu5PDaw
opinion on: 501Please respect copyright.PENANAI7aMFwlISC
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...501Please respect copyright.PENANA6Xf0YGPLqS
30. second chances? - it depends.501Please respect copyright.PENANA7fgtW3WVcs
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.501Please respect copyright.PENANARRKEmU1mS5
32. abortion? - ew.501Please respect copyright.PENANAmqkiL2SW4C
33. a death penalty? - ew.501Please respect copyright.PENANAo2GrTIKz3l
34. marijuana? - i likes that.501Please respect copyright.PENANAJlRcrkEVDk
35. love? - what's love?501Please respect copyright.PENANAkxcAxmsMUc
do you:501Please respect copyright.PENANAivs5axSHtR
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.501Please respect copyright.PENANAY7NMt5jHWJ
501Please respect copyright.PENANABJvKjaqRAV
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3501Please respect copyright.PENANArcfdKEoVP5