
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory445Please respect copyright.PENANALyIoQbTwOd
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 445Please respect copyright.PENANA8HIJMzznL3
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.445Please respect copyright.PENANAdByM1ZjlsR
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?445Please respect copyright.PENANAxnHIEHWTQ2
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.445Please respect copyright.PENANAFqZMdfLiQC
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.445Please respect copyright.PENANAiITngKy457
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.445Please respect copyright.PENANAzDOirU7LNI
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.445Please respect copyright.PENANA9EcPGBAF2A
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?445Please respect copyright.PENANASXQRHDe5MI
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.445Please respect copyright.PENANAh6EBs0VRC2
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.445Please respect copyright.PENANAlTSh69gZXU
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.445Please respect copyright.PENANAbJGOZXmfIM
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 445Please respect copyright.PENANAMuJItxRam3
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.445Please respect copyright.PENANAIpRWS0wEsr
girl bestie? - coco <3445Please respect copyright.PENANAPT7SHe7Gaa
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.445Please respect copyright.PENANA0ZEIQGhO2V
age? - seven years old.445Please respect copyright.PENANAN1uleCREKc
last person i texted? - idfk.445Please respect copyright.PENANAjPAaytPzmG
last person i called? - probably my little brother.445Please respect copyright.PENANAASDW9ADWmv
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?445Please respect copyright.PENANArsntWnrNFP
random fact? - i like food.445Please respect copyright.PENANAKPPZ9X3Cnp
single or taken? - big, fat taken.445Please respect copyright.PENANAhjToJPx4yb
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.445Please respect copyright.PENANA42hKgkXnlu
first kiss? - bitch wtf?445Please respect copyright.PENANAf9cMe5MSBu
ever smoked? - nope.445Please respect copyright.PENANAJDMdnDTXYY
ever done drugs? - nope~445Please respect copyright.PENANA7gcKH3cRLr
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.445Please respect copyright.PENANA54W3Hk82SP
longest relationship? - five and a half months.445Please respect copyright.PENANAu1qxKoAcZ1
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.445Please respect copyright.PENANA8JVb0wNw27
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.445Please respect copyright.PENANAlMTyuOiViV
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.445Please respect copyright.PENANAtdLndveXEQ
obsession? - kpop.445Please respect copyright.PENANAU2mFeCreU5
do you give second chances? - that depends.445Please respect copyright.PENANAnNz0EojpkY
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?445Please respect copyright.PENANA3srGZ4Pudj
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.445Please respect copyright.PENANAolR15wkdZK
day or night? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANAIXZa5aHtAD
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANAEJA5bFri9P
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.445Please respect copyright.PENANAkJAqAzzA1X
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.445Please respect copyright.PENANADrJUF1aixZ
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.445Please respect copyright.PENANAjnQN8yfPnJ
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.445Please respect copyright.PENANA38ffjgwa2e
favourite movie(s)? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANAuHZD7mJB7c
current mood? - bored and tired.445Please respect copyright.PENANAPzI7F4Wzc3
jealous of? - a lot of things.445Please respect copyright.PENANAj1QUvYxQF9
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.445Please respect copyright.PENANA2IkAEjRtgv
pets? - two dogs.445Please respect copyright.PENANApHi8DgNtIU
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.445Please respect copyright.PENANAOpDb738PFU
favourite number? - seven.445Please respect copyright.PENANAlYlamFmch7
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.445Please respect copyright.PENANAqAkW9K6sqz
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.445Please respect copyright.PENANA7Obxp6BgTM
afraid of the dark? - yes.445Please respect copyright.PENANAh6uy8Qy5S1
one wish? - to be happy for real.445Please respect copyright.PENANAIvLhd4F9ty
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?445Please respect copyright.PENANAC5CG0IiNqc
~445Please respect copyright.PENANAe4ZObpmSnR
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.445Please respect copyright.PENANAKhCvlHOWHV
age? - i'm still seven years old.445Please respect copyright.PENANABDKLPGTvjw
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.445Please respect copyright.PENANAjLtyBvhdlY
something you hate about yourself? - my body.445Please respect copyright.PENANAfcQU4Q2hqA
something you like about yourself? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANALYSJSdFxpF
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.445Please respect copyright.PENANAoNKwGvkcEl
favourite band? - bts.445Please respect copyright.PENANAKtmuwsyfrA
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!445Please respect copyright.PENANAxFgbbhccHo
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.445Please respect copyright.PENANAbZ6EscIsGp
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.445Please respect copyright.PENANAVIOWZJCTfA
girl crush? - emmi.445Please respect copyright.PENANAEJbaIqoWkd
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.445Please respect copyright.PENANAfwPfLjfR1S
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^445Please respect copyright.PENANA8pAkf5CfM4
talents? - singing.445Please respect copyright.PENANAZgXZ8d1loA
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.445Please respect copyright.PENANASPN31g6hb3
someone i love? - emmi.445Please respect copyright.PENANA49GgfGTGoE
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.445Please respect copyright.PENANAZtpeLA6HWS
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.445Please respect copyright.PENANAfV5Rdh7rXc
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.445Please respect copyright.PENANALjS4oMvJxS
favourite animal? - dogs.445Please respect copyright.PENANAT63Fwo0egK
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 445Please respect copyright.PENANAfwWwMSHLfS
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.445Please respect copyright.PENANACVugCDH39U
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.445Please respect copyright.PENANAJomeuBJAqF
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.445Please respect copyright.PENANA45CqsanpbH
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.445Please respect copyright.PENANAzdGh0QImgy
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 445Please respect copyright.PENANAcL4VY2aLpE
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.445Please respect copyright.PENANAyV4J8kOujZ
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.445Please respect copyright.PENANALuxrysQazV
~445Please respect copyright.PENANAjZqxBqGqPG
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.445Please respect copyright.PENANAys3ARPswWz
country? - i don't live on earth. 445Please respect copyright.PENANAaZKec9tiSm
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.445Please respect copyright.PENANAsyq83PT8H8
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.445Please respect copyright.PENANA2k3E4bxoo4
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.445Please respect copyright.PENANAqwKdmKCO6f
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.445Please respect copyright.PENANAhG7wphKQgf
country with your favourite accent? - australia.445Please respect copyright.PENANAvELaVIouiG
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.445Please respect copyright.PENANA3Z9eIU8e5H
dog or cat person? - both.445Please respect copyright.PENANA5s111CppOx
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.445Please respect copyright.PENANAJYNWFel6Bs
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.445Please respect copyright.PENANAQN6FvHmrtw
do you belive in God? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANAl1wWAxvdZe
single or taken? - taken.445Please respect copyright.PENANAIRT3ccyUL8
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*445Please respect copyright.PENANAYS5MFPTzVe
birthday year? - 1930.445Please respect copyright.PENANAE8FRE19n5K
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.445Please respect copyright.PENANA1BdlazoXms
age? - what's that?445Please respect copyright.PENANAISLlXAT8N0
enthinicity? - african american.445Please respect copyright.PENANA732Jx200Ru
tea or coffee? - neither.445Please respect copyright.PENANAz4Tk7DhUsH
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.445Please respect copyright.PENANAX9ONK3EfEq
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*445Please respect copyright.PENANA6BjHDKgB4K
favourite food? - ice cream.445Please respect copyright.PENANAGKHNkWxWQm
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 445Please respect copyright.PENANAXten6QdyEo
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.445Please respect copyright.PENANA5xIrOmq3Sk
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.445Please respect copyright.PENANAmk5D1e0bDi
favourite soda? - sprite.445Please respect copyright.PENANAW0zStwSYYP
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.445Please respect copyright.PENANAUmBQcs66pA
can you swim? - yes, wtf?445Please respect copyright.PENANAQ58QE8ihJj
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.445Please respect copyright.PENANACMNZKnIMqL
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.445Please respect copyright.PENANAKjqwBv6c7m
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.445Please respect copyright.PENANA8o1VAcGtW6
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.445Please respect copyright.PENANAjlRyZV7FTZ
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*445Please respect copyright.PENANA3yZQVqJmCc
apple or andriod? - apple.445Please respect copyright.PENANAuYoya573uT
best dessert? - mochi.445Please respect copyright.PENANAGDXLRYEc3W
~445Please respect copyright.PENANAYHROibeRhL
have you ever:445Please respect copyright.PENANAAUoJFlJkyE
1. skipped class? - yes.445Please respect copyright.PENANAvZslxx0b1F
2. done drugs? - no.445Please respect copyright.PENANA4rrJWDU3KL
3. self-harmed? - yes.445Please respect copyright.PENANAGldxM1TidA
4. drank? - no.445Please respect copyright.PENANALVk39kdYyQ
5. shoplifted? - yes.445Please respect copyright.PENANAHqOH5mH5fM
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.445Please respect copyright.PENANA8paqD2wqV4
7. broken up with someone? - yes.445Please respect copyright.PENANA3qQ9suGevn
what's your favourite:445Please respect copyright.PENANAYlX2OeoxRd
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.445Please respect copyright.PENANA4ZyGX0elRg
9. movie? - break the silence.445Please respect copyright.PENANA0pQIryQxSB
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.445Please respect copyright.PENANAXG53VBIEzL
11. artist? - bts.445Please respect copyright.PENANAlLd5x2NK3A
12. singer or band? - bts.445Please respect copyright.PENANAKoOgc1i1Sn
13. memory? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANA8Xh0es8Iak
14. book? - the cruel prince.445Please respect copyright.PENANAcI97SFWeSG
this or that:445Please respect copyright.PENANAyxvKHmzql1
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.445Please respect copyright.PENANAIBdGaoNkrR
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.445Please respect copyright.PENANABR6sdM3x5H
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.445Please respect copyright.PENANAtrJyPQHHxa
18. movies or books? - idk.445Please respect copyright.PENANAQPnhnjRSB6
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.445Please respect copyright.PENANAOAEZug0zsZ
20. blind of deaf? - blind.445Please respect copyright.PENANAgQhMplJB8t
21. tea or coffee? - neither.445Please respect copyright.PENANAuWVadklYG4
what's your:445Please respect copyright.PENANAWobd66tXjM
22. age? - ninety-one.445Please respect copyright.PENANALPwc1Tmwjf
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.445Please respect copyright.PENANAFGeA7mUOiZ
24. height? - 4'11.445Please respect copyright.PENANAnX8gOb50Fo
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.445Please respect copyright.PENANAjUpJjYMVXZ
26. shoe size? - seven.445Please respect copyright.PENANANKp0QHy7Jv
27. religion? - i'm not religious.445Please respect copyright.PENANAI1kOhVXMWM
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.445Please respect copyright.PENANAFh4j4SvqPM
opinion on: 445Please respect copyright.PENANAhQcRLEpPWP
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...445Please respect copyright.PENANAr7lfEFKFKd
30. second chances? - it depends.445Please respect copyright.PENANAdgk4TP55lc
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.445Please respect copyright.PENANAQbqWOh2y2B
32. abortion? - ew.445Please respect copyright.PENANAJZmXp743ar
33. a death penalty? - ew.445Please respect copyright.PENANAOHPPYEhXLR
34. marijuana? - i likes that.445Please respect copyright.PENANAZU9FpgG5bO
35. love? - what's love?445Please respect copyright.PENANA2SYVx6GxRe
do you:445Please respect copyright.PENANAypdszJddkg
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.445Please respect copyright.PENANAWLqIIww6tT
445Please respect copyright.PENANAG0vUi4L1Fg
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3445Please respect copyright.PENANAGkcJwp4yEp