[FANFIC - HBD, KARIN!] PÉRIODICITÉ (SK)
Title: périodicité511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQ34EBLX1Z
By: Kanae (Goth-Punk88 @ ff.net)511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXprBriMUE
Rating: K+511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF0hyUyx2QL
Word Count: 2.817511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARET5oiGxT
Author's Notes: Made for our "Karin's birthday week" over at the Ice&Spice FC @ NF ♥ I... don't even know what this is, or where it came from, and it's possibly one of the cheesiest pieces I've written for SK. But I kind of regret nothing lol - Oh and that novice drawing at the top of the fic? yup, mines. guilty as charged orz511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtNCiCVeub
Summary: June 20 has never been an ordinary day for one Uzumaki Karin.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDKpVPGd5G
périodicité (periodicity)511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsD6ZupXcpa
"recurrence at regular intervals of time."
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périodicité;511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkuuQjnKKBc
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by Kanae
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“Don’t look so down, darling. This is a great chance for you.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlrXEVNkUiV
“…Yeah… a great chance to make a fool of myself, you mean.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2fd8KGnGQ
A twinkling laugh, a delicate hand warmly lands over a girl’s head and—
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At twelve, there aren’t many things that Karin has done or that she wishes to do. She is just an ordinary girl from an ordinary family living in an ordinary village; there is nothing special about her, nothing out of the norm, nothing that makes her stand out—if one ignores her flagrant red hair, that is.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZ5hb4mzeQ
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But that is just what her father seems to have wanted to do all along.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZ2fh3pCrM
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You’re going out? Don’t forget to put your hood on, Karin, he would say, whenever Karin had to wander away from the immediate realms of their home. Why, papa? She used to ask when she was no more than a little girl; but that was a habit that slowly but surely withered and died as she began to grow up—as she started to grow aware enough to notice the wary air her father’s kind, wise red eyes acquired as the reminder left his lips.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV8ILePnTS0
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As she grew older, Karin learned to recognize it for what it truly was: more a warning than a piece of advice; and she began to grow more jittery as result, more worn at the seams.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU9BtPsvESg
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Her red hair was her only outstanding trait, the only thing that made her different—without it, Karin may as well fade into the scenery.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmpv5DNV0g
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She may as well not exist.
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—and ruffles her hair.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5RBsoqR5ZK
“Now, now, don’t be like that. I have a good feeling about this, you know?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQCTr1esWg
“…What do you mean, mama?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HtR5kiPLD
A secretive smile highlighted by—
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At thirteen, Karin nearly dies.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThPfO0mCO7
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And then she is saved—saved by a striking boy with a rich voice and eyes that warm her up to the core the moment he smiles—at her, for her—and suddenly, Karin does not feel so ordinary anymore.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJiJqqnq9yd
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There is something different about you, her mother tells her once with a knowing smile, ever since you came back from Konoha.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuW2V64zNj
Karin jumps in her seat, awkward denial bubbling up in her throat and evaporating the moment her mother laughs, I like it. You look prettier, Karin.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uRsatOJOd
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She does not know about that—can’t see any difference as she looks at herself in the mirror, self-consciously pulling on some strands of red hair and squinting at her reflection.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXnyHWQSPKI
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What she does know, though—what she can’t forget, is—511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKXiVkTyQR
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See ya, he had said, and it takes Karin a surprising amount of time to realize that, for the first time since she could remember, there was something she wanted.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIHbWN3vXQi
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Wanted for herself; not for her parents, not for those she cares about. Something that was completely hers, in all its staggering intensity and youthful hope.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡroyS0qmw6J
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See ya, he had said, and until then Karin had never quite known how good it felt to feel alive.
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—by amber eyes that seem to spark.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYjPloQmL6
“Ara~ I wonder if I should tell you. It is a safely guarded secret, you see.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ61GeVXRCpC
“I will keep it! I promise, I won’t tell anybody, mama!”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc2gjaD5yUR
A chuckle, “Alright, alright! Since you insist, I'll tell you. It—”
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At fourteen, Karin breathes her last breath.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2tY5LDlhJ
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There is no blood—not hers—involved, nor are there any wounds—not physical ones—or any white walls or tunnels and gates of light—no light, only dark—only smoke—only the smell of burnt flesh and intest—511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJH8wzLrBcj
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There is, however, anguish. An agony so great that Karin bit her lip until it bled, fisted her palms until her nails left permanent crescent-moon shaped scars in the contours of her skin, new batches added to already cracked life lines.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfTskzV8d6L
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There are silent, chocked sobs that made her throat burn and her sight blur until she has ran out of tears.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzo8uG6JsS
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And there is also horror; a burning, paralyzing sort of horror that reaches its peak and fades into a mute but perpetual tune stringing the chords of her being as she comes back and stares at the corpses of her father and mother, unrecognizable masses of ashes retching of burnt blood and bodily fluids that make a pile of vile crawl its way up to her tongue.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9crwR0L9Eq
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And then, there is he—sidestepping the man with ominous dark chakra and extending a hand towards her, onyx eyes boring into her own with the same might with which the understanding in his chakra drove her horror away.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdEKKbI92Il
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You staying here will amount to nothing, but you leaving just might, he says. Come, Karin, he calls.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOuO1Sf3LZJ
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She takes his hand, and there is hope.
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“—It is said that one too many women in our family have found their fate in the lands of Konohagakure.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttW1VhEtSA
“Their… fate?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxy7axpDjm
Her voice curls up around the edges, as if it were a spell.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8kSYG8ozTV
“You will understand in—”
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At fifteen, Karin has shed her skin.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7S6AKbICZm
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There are now sharp edges where there used to be soft contours; angry frowns where there used to be kindness, smirks where there used to be smiles; buoyancy where there once was shame, barriers in what once were vast landscapes—and there are also scars.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBrVZKhev3t
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Tell-tale scars of the Karin she used to be and new, revolting ones from the Karin she has become. She hides the latter and denies the former; pretends they’re long gone, never aching, never hurting anymore.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmkp56ohke
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Yet, he sees them all. As if she wore them on her sleeve.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1aTBthTPgN
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“Say, Sasuke, since we’re alone how about we—”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlAocKOvYvS
“I have to leave soon, Karin.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvwLafTTz5
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She puts her glasses back on and crosses her arms with a frown, moving away from him. “Why did you even bother coming, then?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP91Vaub3Xh
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Sasuke says nothing, then. He says nothing, and Karin straightens, her back suddenly assaulted by gooseflesh; could he—?511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhgg86ErMkR
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Could he have possibly known? Known how before his unexpected arrival, Karin had been hounded by her memories. Seeing familiar faces in the nameless prisoners of the base, ghosts come back to haunt her and pull her down with them to the depths of hell—a hell made of nothing but flames and guilt of mistakes she is not sure she would take back, even if she could.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnknfb3Fs6
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“…I had business here, is all.” His voice reaches out to her through the haze of her thoughts, pulling her back with nonchalant words that seemed devoid of any meaning.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38m7ItNCwc
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But as she turns and her eyes meet his, Karin sees.
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“—in due time, Karin.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡatwLFA49wP
“Still, mama… it just isn’t fair.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDhDYeJlD4
“What isn’t, dear?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9MgBmc78n
“… I wanted to spend my birthday with you and papa.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIxtoI49VkN
Her smile—
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At sixteen, Karin falls.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXeTrbxuyT7
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She falls from a great, great height at appalling speed; she hasn’t even had time to acknowledge the abysm before she has hit rock bottom, her goals and dreams spilling through her open chest and pooling on the ground alongside everything she knows.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6kKVdFOiw
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Alongside everything she once held dear. Everyone she relied on. The one she trusted.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTW0cIUlx3y
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Now, there was no one left.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeNLB8MHxCD
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No one left but the roaming, empty carcass of the boy she once loved; the boy who taught her what it felt like to be alive, the boy who gave her hope and helped her find meaning back when she had lost her way, the boy who helped her to be reborn from her ashes into someone better; someone stronger, someone capable of standing up for herself and for him, too. The boy who flared her will and her drive with a single touch, with a single look, with the simplest of words—511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYplhLjqU3T
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I need you511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqp5dtNL4UQ
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“So much for that,” Karin mutters to no one, her back pressed against the cold walls of a cell and her fingers absentmindedly tracing the ghost of the wound that had taken her heart out for good.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbdR6FTj9Zn
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And then it comes. An almost unnoticeable flicker—too subtle to be perceived, but too longed for to be ignored.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXj80SirMdW
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No… I’ve had enough, Sasuke but her withered heart is trying to beat again, and it makes up her mind for her.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvblXDIQJw
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“…So much for this,” Karin murmurs to herself—and then she is on her feet again, her inner eye tracing his every move.
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—melts.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynLDxqzvz3
“Cheer up, love. There will be many birthdays left for us to celebrate together.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeuZo25PUVH
“… You promise?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHOGdx7CirR
Her gaze softens.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjVh2s7DjM6
“I promise.”
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At seventeen, Karin kisses him.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNkxH5bDY8
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She impulsively crashes her lips against his, her arms thrown around his neck in a desperate attempt to hold onto him—to anchor him down before his essence could have the chance to fade into pitch black darkness again, to feel him before he could have the chance to waste his life—her life, their future—chasing phantoms all the way to the death.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRO1vGkMht
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When the impromptu kiss ends, Karin sees him—the him she knows, the him she loves—flickering across his eyes for the briefest of moments, and she hears her name resounding in her ears even though he has not uttered a single sound.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEvpE3VLzr
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She smiles ruefully; trembling eyes boring into his—and then wordlessly lets him go.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GrAI6gDcU
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She has given him a reason, but the choice is his to make.
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“Ha, so it was about a boy, I knew it!”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Y6XXoO1Fr
“Shh, mama! I don’t want papa to hear! And… it’s not like I’m ever going to see him again, anyway….”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMfKrK40Yj5
Her mother has to hide her smile, “Actually, Karin… something tells me you just might.”
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At eighteen, Sasuke kisses her back.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcdcuzY9Wa
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It is not nearly as passionate as her—their—first kiss had been; there is no desperation, no adrenaline—but there is craving all the same, waving through the serenity threading over her through the gentle pressure of his fingertips over the nape of her neck, enveloping her like a makeshift cloak and warming her down to her very core.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgtDsgNMhj3
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And Karin feels her very essence quiver under it—under the warmth and the way her heart seemed to want to leave her and jump into him instead, to claim the home it has always longed for; the home it has always fought for.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDDwgAt3H9
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The home it belonged to.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnIzhvsp9mO
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As he kisses her, sunrays clumsily dancing upon her lips, Karin feels like she would vaporize into him if Sasuke were to take a single breath.
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“How do you know?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyG1tjHh6Zw
“Because, that’s how fate works, Karin.”
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At nineteen, Karin smiles.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWY8MGVfKo
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“Itachi,” she says, and Sasuke looks up to her, startled. “The name… Itachi. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cL2miawBT
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Sasuke parts his lips—once, twice—but no sound comes out and soon enough he gives up altogether, lowering his eyes to stare at the bundle in his arms. It stares back at him, impossibly red eyes widened with innocent curiosity, pink tongue sticking out from underneath rosy lips.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHUCKShHnb
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“Are you sure, Karin?” he whispers after what seemed like an eternity, and Karin’s smile only widens.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjQOtU8MYZI
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“Yeah.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCv4VvKL9p
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And as she sees them—as she sees Sasuke hold their baby as if he were holding the whole, wide world in the crook of his arms—Karin remembers her mother with such vivid clarity that she catches a breath of her perfume. The memory—the vision is bittersweet, and it makes Karin’s throat clog, because she recognizes that look.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUP6gqyR1K
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It was the way her mother used to look at her father and her, eyes brimming with love and pride, unspoken but ever-present, never changing. Karin had not been able to understand it, then—511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJR7br51Xey
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But she did, now. And the understanding squeezed her heart in a way that was both, wonderful and terrible. To think it took her this long to finally understand, once and for all, what it all meant.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYNMPbTcyVi
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To understand who her mother truly was, what her mother felt, what her mother desired for her—and how her mother hurt.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡosLPKgQNQF
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You’re special, Karin. She would tell her sometimes, her eyes half-lidded and afflicted by thoughts she would never get the chance to say aloud. One day, you will realize that.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN3uMEUu1pA
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She realized it, now; what it meant to love to her roots, what it meant to be a woman.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRgY0yVj6vL
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An Uzumaki woman.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4c2Z2Ot8Je
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“… Thank you, Karin.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvwXXyS5qh
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“Idiot,” she shakes her head, weakly, traitorous tears prickling at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill. “That... should be my line.”
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“They will be here soon,”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAVHI8o7pnM
“Who will be here soon, mama?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkq2YitKKPF
“It could be anyone,” she finally replies, and her hold is steady as she combs through Karin’s hair, “we have long since lost any care for their identities, Karin. What matters is… what their presence means.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwGaPoXRXWd
“And what is that?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLQYop7XWVd
Her silence provides the only answer; and Karin wishes it weren’t enough.
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At twenty, Karin celebrates her birthday for the first time in seven years.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHTyKstVIX
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And it starts with a soft but firm admittance whispered as she caresses the baby’s nose, all too aware of the pleasant weight of Sasuke’s gaze, of the feelings swirling in his chakra.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqPG2SPlsQ
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Hearing them is unexpected, however—and her widened eyes snap to his only to find his lips beginning to curve, his own hand coming to caress her cheek in much the same way she was doing to their son.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyqnRWP340
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“W—what was that about?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZN0SHwDO8
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She asks; some habits are hard to break, and her awkward way of fighting down her embarrassment seemed to be as persistent as ever.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyOkcZwPNR7
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Sasuke doesn’t seem to mind, though. If anything, his smile seems to morph into an amused smirk as he shrugs, noncommittally. “I just felt like saying it, is all.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8nX2z6yBj
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“Dumbass,” she mutters, hoping the darkness will hide the way her cheeks have warmed up like bonfires, so reminiscent of her prepubescent days when all she could do was a dream she would one day lay with Sasuke the way she does now. “...You didn't need to.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTljTmk9u95
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“I know, Karin,” and this time he is positively smiling, suddenly mutating back into the Sasuke that had stolen her heart so many years ago. “But it still felt good to say it.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsNDO88HkP
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Karin says nothing in response; simply snuggles closer to him, eyes on the baby as he opens his eyes and blinks, his little hands curling and uncurling up into the air.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡweXvNYkUSd
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“He is going to be strong,” Sasuke assesses, and Karin would have mocked him by how ridiculous it was that he sounds that proud of Itachi when the baby hasn’t even said his first word yet, weren’t it because she felt the same way.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkaR8ms0j1
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He was going to be strong. A little piece of herself and Sasuke—a memento of those who had given their life up for them; a torch for those who had granted them the chance to live this moment.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7iQQmUq1a
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To live this happiness.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0lQHvRjEeK
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“Happy birthday, Itachi,” she whispers, and squeezes Sasuke’s hand. “I love you.”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTIN8syIg3N
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The words feel dusty, and unknown—but familiar.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMgcgspoY6y
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She knew them, once.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaRrZfeWbtB
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She has known them all along.
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I'm sorry, Karin.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDreKuYA9Fv
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Were the last words her mother told her before her father ushered her out of the house and prompted her to run—run as far as she could, away from them—and forced her to leave them to die.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj3M1ragpwO
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To survive.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZQaU8d5HC
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Those words used to hunt Karin down in those nights when sleep refused to lend her its hand, the eerie walls of Orochimaru’s hideout caving in on her and Sasuke’s steady chakra being her only relief, her only shield.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfogxd2qgYN
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Yet, what haunted her weren’t the words themselves, but their meaning; Karin had instinctively known then, just as clear as she knows now, that her mother was not apologizing for forcing her to forsake them and live on.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9AGXBc4Ui
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No, that was not it—that was not the kind of woman her mother had been.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6U9Gj9MeIK
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Instead, she had apologized for something else entirely.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPW67yROpPp
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For the unsaid.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtgfl6vq2eq
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“What are you thinking about, Karin?”511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0rOf8Q2VZO
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Her lips curl upward as he takes the seat by her side, repentances fading away into the evening sky.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt9fay4OtPU
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“Nothing,” she replies, threading her fingers through his and gazing back to their children, who were laughing and running together through the backyard, a lively mixture of reds and blacks; the Uchiha and Uzumaki crests proudly etched on their backs, on their hearts.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgR30pVojZ
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“Nothing at all.”
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"You will be fine."511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSFxybAvtU
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And through the tears and the pain and the loneliness and the longing and the hardships and the fear, Karin should have known better.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe9qBNKrYgj
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Her mother was always right.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOnNdHPlAh
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end.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhw3mJWrFfM
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I... seriously don't know where all this came from; my best guess: Uzumaki feelings. Uzumaki feelings everywhere. lol, I tried to play with the different facets of Karin, and how she grows into each one of them; plus SK, of course.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtuhMstvYa9
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The stuff I wrote here is not quite how I see things going, though; to do that I would have had to write about 395749574 vignettes per year, rather than only one lol so I went for rushed versions of a couple of scenarios I had thought about.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBl5NNkXdmq
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Oh and while I did not state it in the fic: every vignette takes place on Karin's birthday, so the baby was born on June 20, too.511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwbJLYiPeg
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Anyway, hopefully, it wasn't that terrible! ♥511Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeGpWWsrAvK
tags: fanfic, karin, naruto, sasukarin, sasuke
i'm : 
cheerful
listening to: never let me go - florence + the machine
ns216.73.216.19da2
