I didn't feel good lying to myself and others. I know I am gay, but I didn't want to be. But now I feel good about myself. And now I am going to tell people about my true self.
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I am in the kitchen hurrying up to finish my cereal before I go on the bus. My mom just walked in, am I am starting to get nervous. I start to shake as my mom just stares at me.
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"What's wrong with you this morning?" My mom ask me.
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"I really don't want you to get mad at me." I say back to her.
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"Just go ahead and say it."
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I stood there silent. The tone of her voice when she said that sounded like she is going to judge me badly.
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"Mom I'm gay. And I would like for you to accept it please." I quenched up, thinking that she was going to slammed something in my face.
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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Well that could have been better. I'm now living with my aunt. Because my mom kicked me out. And my dad left when I was just three, he went back to Japan.
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Right when I started to feel good about myself, something had to blow in my face.
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But I love my aunt. She is really understanding. And her daughter is a lesbian. So I just fit right in. And I'm still going to the same schools so that is just wonderful. But my cousin gave me back my confidence.
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"Look it's middle school. Where the most judgmental people go to learn. But when you go to high school, people don't care, because they are worried about college or some shit. Not if some one is sweet." Aaliyah told me with an attitude. We were folding clothes up, and she would slam the clothes down on the bed that she just folded seconds earlier.
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"So. . . Don't say anything until high school then?" I was still confused.
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"No, Alexander people don't give two shits about your life in high school. Only the teachers about your grades."
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"Okay, well. I want a boyfriend. So I have to say it for guys to come to me right?"
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"Whatever dude. I don't care."
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"Yeah but you would care if I told auntie about that nineteen in honors biology." I laughed. I picked up a pile of clothes and started to put them up in my closet.
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"Whoa, I thought we were cool."
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"We are."
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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I was on the bus when I decided to tell that I was gay. I know the consequences. But I want to go ahead and get it over with, so I wouldn't have to deal with it later.
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I tapped on a guy that just burst out with new gossip everyday. But a lot of people don't know that he spreads their privacy though.
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"Hey dude. You look like you can keep a secret. And I want to just tell one person so can I tell you?" I asked him. Wondering if it's a bad idea to tell him at all.
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"Sure man I won't tell anyone. You can trust me." He responded, he leaned closer to me.
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"Well I'm gay. And I've been keeping it in for awhile."
545Please respect copyright.PENANAGxguGriW7b
"Um okay."
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Now just let the magic begin. I have nothing to worry about.
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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"Fag." One person said to me while walking passed me in the hallways.
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I thought it would have turned out better than this. I get called a 'fag'. Or I'll get pushed and shoved. I'll be tripped by someone's feet. And the teachers be seeing it but don't do anything about it.
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I told Aaliyah, and she just said, "Dude, they're a bunch of dicks. So don't worry. I got your back. . . Well after school of course. Wait until we hit that Walmart though, and they be there, and try to bully you. All you be hearing is sirens going off."
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I laugh as she try to act like that. She's awesome in my opinion. I don't know even know that she has any enemy's.
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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"So you're really gay?" The most popular guy in school asked me. I was scared that he was going to punch me or worse.
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He plays mostly all the sports in middle school. All the teachers know him. All the parents know him.
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"Yeah so what?" I replied back. Not feeling for the harsh words, that was about to come out of his mouth.
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"Do you want to go out with me?"
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"Is this some sort of joke?! And if it's is then haha! Now where are the guys hiding? Behind the bleachers or something?" I'm not in the mood for bullshit. After people knew, I just didn't give a crap about school. All my three years at this middle school and I am just done. Screw all the teachers, students, and staff. After this year I am out of here.
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"I'm not joking. I have been holding back until now. But I'm still in the closet. So let's keep it a secret."
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"Well I'm telling you no."
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"You're telling me no?"
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"Yup. I am telling you no. And tell your friends that if they wanted to pull the prank off, then they should have not picked you. Good bye." I kinda regret saying that. Because he is freakin hot. But I know that it's a joke and not for real. But I wish it was.
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"I'm not joking! I'm serious! Tomorrow after school, meet me at the damn park. Then you have to freaking believe me."
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"Why are you going way into your prank?"
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"Because it's not a prank."
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"Fine. Tomorrow after school. The park."
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"Alright meet you there."
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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"What do you mean pick you up a little later? You know once I hit that bed I ain't gettin' up." Aaliyah asked, when I called her the day later after school.
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"This boy asked me to come here. He wants to prove something to me." I told her. Trying to end the conversation quickly.
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"I'll be there, I'll hide. Just incase something bad happens. He might beat you up. So if that happens then I will pop out of nowhere and kill that mofo."
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"No he asked to meet in private. Okay. I'll tell you details later, alright?"
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"Alright bro. But if you come home with bruises then I ain't disaffecting them."
545Please respect copyright.PENANAZPaB7H1pox
"Deal."
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I knew that he had practice today. But I don't know what kind of practice. I waited and waited.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAInkVsivYx2
I was about to leave, and call Aaliyah. When I saw him coming from the other side.
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"Sorry to make you wait." He apologized to me.
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"You made it in time me because I was about to leave." I told him straight up.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAWZIOMrQm0m
"Now you believe me?"
545Please respect copyright.PENANA8HtebwFmEQ
"Fine. But how do you want to do it?" I asked him, way to curious.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAiy8gWa5Fr5
"Well I want to kiss you."
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"Whoa! What?!"
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"Well like I said I was in the closet. And I haven't had a girlfriend. Nor a boyfriend. So I don't know what to do."
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Him?! The popular guy at school doesn't know about dating?! This can be happening! I want up kiss him back, but I don't know how to. But he doesn't either. . . So how would he know if I'm bad or not?
545Please respect copyright.PENANAFwdEiTExJ6
I grabbed his hand and pulled him to the nearest tallest, and fullest tree. I kissed him real fast. I didn't expect that at all. I thought I would use tongue or something like on tv.
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"Can we do it again but longer?" He asked me, his face flustered.
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My face turned more red. And I thought it wouldn't be more red than this. But I am always wrong.
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I slowly touched his lips, I held it there for a while, scared to stick my tongue in. And why am I taking the lead?! Is he a bottom or something?! I can't handle that!
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I released my lips from his and we just stared at each other.
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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A few weeks later, we were experimenting a lot of things at the park. Tongue kissing. Touching. Just a bunch of things.
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We would ignore each other during school, which makes me depressed. But at least I have him. Right? And I hate the girls that hang around him.
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We were in P.E where today is height and weight check. I hate it. Like doesn't the doctor already do that? Do we need extra people looking and judging us?
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I was sitting at the bleachers with my book, minding my own business. When the coach called up my name.
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I started to walk when I guy stuck his foot out right when I was about to pass him. I struck the floor with a loud THUD. I shook it off while people was laughing. Filling the while entire gym.
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"Hey! What's wrong with you?! No one hurts him. And I don't care if he's gay or not. So you better apologize before I kick your ass!" His deep loud voice, silenced everyone in the room.
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"Whoa, Jake, relax. It was just a joke." The guy that tripped me said.
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"Don't do it ever again. And like I said apologize. . . Oh. And if he tells me that someone says something bad or hurt him in any kind of way. I will hurt you. I don't even care if you are a girl. You understand?!!!"
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His voice scared me. A lot. Making me shake.
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"Jake! That's enough. Do you need to calm down a bit?" The coach asked him. Somehow not angry. But if course. Why would you want to angry that best player? Ugh. He has the best life.
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"No sir." He replied back.
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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"Thank you a lot." I thanked him as we were under the same tree as the first time we met.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAHjKSXmcX0J
"No problem. I don't want anyone to hurt you. You're mine."
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"I'm yours really?"
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"Yeah."
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We kissed some more. His and went inside my pants as he fondled my private parts. I did the same thing. But not as much movements, bacause of the feels from him are to much.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAQwrgfMlcXa
"You want to take it to the next level?" He asked me.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAYNcRjvflgQ
"You mean. . ."
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"Yeah sex."
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"But aren't we already doing it?" I looked down to where his hand is and looked back at him.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAHfwvnQoopj
"Yeah, but take it further." He said. Reaching his hand to the back of my pants squeezing my butt.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAEhMgVPafbQ
I really don't want that to happened. But then again I do. But I want some time.
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"Well, before we do that. You have to come out. Because our feelings have to be in it or it won't be good. And if you come out then I will know that you like me like you say a lot a times before."
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"You don't trust me enough do you?"
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"Does it sound like it?"
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"No."
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"Alright. So how did you do yours?" He asked me. Wanting my advice.
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"I just told the kid that gossips a lot that is on my bus. Nathan McDonald. Do you know him?"
545Please respect copyright.PENANA1k284htpKI
"Alright. He is in my computer class. I'll tell him tomorrow then."
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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The next day. While I was in art class. I heard. People talking about Jake. Man that guy can spread stuff fast.
545Please respect copyright.PENANA3bxPBETjRM
"That's a lie. Jake can't be gay. He's to hot."
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"I heard it from Nathan. It's real. His stuff that he talks about come from primary sources. Hey did you hear me use that smart word? I rocked it didn't I?"
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"Ghaw!! And I was about to ask him out too."
545Please respect copyright.PENANAUhVWPOJlFq
I was listening in to people talking about Jake. And I heard no negative comments about him. All they talked about was how they couldn't believe it. And they were shocked.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAn41DlL078R
Yeah and when I did it. All there was was bad talk about me. A lot of harsh words stabbing me in the back.
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"I told. Have you heard it yet?" Jake asked me during lunch.
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"Yeah. I have." I told him. Eating my sandwich.
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"And I told my parents about it to. And they were okay with it. And all my dad said was that he won't kick me out for being gay. But if I rank number two on my sports. Then he would beat me up to a pulp, then kick me out. Funny right?"
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Wow both is parents were okay with it. I couldn't tell my dad because he left. And the only parent I have, which is my mom. Kicked me out! His life is just fantastic. Everyone wants his life. And everyone want to be him or date him.
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"Good." I left it as that and walked out of the cafeteria.
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*・゜゚・*:.。..。.:*・''・*:.。. .。.:*・゜゚・*
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I haven't been at the park to meet him in a while. And I as void him in the hallways
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and the cafeteria. I just can't stand him now for some reason.
545Please respect copyright.PENANA2OnMld8Joi
I was in my math class when the someone knocked on the door. I was the closest. So I opened it.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAmfi4RL8UDa
Jake was at the door just staring at me.
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"Mrs. Grett can I borrow Alexander? I need to ask him an important question. That I need the answer to now."
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"Yes you may."
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He grabbed my arm and yanked me out of the room. Hurting my arm. He pulled me into the staff bathroom and locked the door.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAyfNNciNlzS
"Why have you been avoiding me?!" He asked, whispering harshly at me.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAjRM4CY1pv9
"I don't want to be with you any more." I told him.
545Please respect copyright.PENANA31205vUH5v
"Why?! Is it because I scared you about the whole sex thing?!"
545Please respect copyright.PENANAhhR75wNrJI
"No."
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"Then what the hell is it then?!" His facial expression turned harsh. But that didn't effect me.
545Please respect copyright.PENANA3vQIxm2NzN
"Oh so you really want to know then? Well of course you always get things your way." I tried to open the door and walk out but Jakes hand was pressing against it.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAo0UVca1mAI
"What is that suppose mean?"
545Please respect copyright.PENANAXVKZ8VmFCn
"What I mean is that. Everything is never hard on you. No one talks bad about you behind your back. Or that your parents didn't kick you out!" I didn't whispered. I full faced yelled at him.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAdMKJwwAeQl
"Whoa. Your parents kicked you out?"
545Please respect copyright.PENANAjau2bvWjJS
"No. . . One. My mom. My dad left when I was young. But you wouldn't understand. You have both your parents. That love you and stupid crap like that. It disgust me." I started to pull at the knob, trying to leave her room. But he is way stronger than me.
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"I didn't know about that. Why didn't you tell me that? All I talk about is my family, when we are at the park. You should have said something." He grasped my face gently. But I pulled away.
545Please respect copyright.PENANA184rsNr5mB
"I don't have to tell you anything."
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"Your my boyfriend. I want you to tell me things like that. I like you Alexander."
545Please respect copyright.PENANARwkBjVYTgd
I looked at him. His eyes, just staring at me. He again grasped my face gently. Pulling me in for a kiss. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. Loving each and every second of it.
545Please respect copyright.PENANAeJ6q9TuoWV
We were in the bathroom. Just touching each other for a while, when the announcements came on.
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"Alexander Thomson and Jake Petterson come to the front office now. Alexander Thomson and Jake Petterson come to the front office now."
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I looked at Jake. "What are we gonna say when we get there?"
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Well if you liked it please like and comment!!!!
545Please respect copyright.PENANAdv4Usk4oxa
Well I gotta go
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ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=ε=┌(; ̄◇ ̄)┘
545Please respect copyright.PENANAk3G3hMHZly
BYE!!!!!
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ns216.73.216.201da2