I woke the next morning on the living room couch, my head nestled into the crook of Christian’s neck. He smelled of sweat and boy, and as I exhaled, I shook my head. I couldn’t do this now, think about him this way. It wasn’t right.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03vHUYZGTE
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Slowly, he shifted and drew his arms around my body, pulling me closer so that my nose touched the pulse of his neck. I tried to untangle his arms when he cracked one, groggy, hazel eye open. He smiled lazily and blinked.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSE9r1qiqhX
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“You’re leaving?” he asked, frowning.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheUD5OYmYf
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“It’s morning,” I said. “Plus it’s my house and my mom should be getting up soon.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1fXCHnH3rn
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbknv7Q3zP
“Kendall.” Christian’s voice was calm. “What’s wrong with your mom?”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqvNrGwE7X
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I glanced behind my shoulder at him; he was sitting up and looking at me with his hair hanging in his eyes. I shook my head and wrapped my fingers in my hair, determined not to pull it out under the circumstances.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3mkMcuy5nh
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDHQlCGbaK
“Nothing’s wrong with her,” I said. “Why would you think that?”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrl51bnHdcT
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTYKB5AW1n
He stared at me, his lip twitching slightly. “Please. I’m not stupid. You could have called if you needed a place to stay.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FOHt6Hy8g
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“This is my home,” I replied, my fingers itching to touch him. “I have to stay here, to help my mom. You’d do the same for yours.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6AFiajCjpu
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNAWUUGk6Pu
He nodded. “I would.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfK1K1rZWd
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What he was going to say was, I would if I had one484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtEfYl59fZ8
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZnceCV2fH6
Christian’s mom died in a car accident a few years ago, leaving him and his father to fend for themselves. All of this had been revealed the first night I met Christian, at a party over the summer. I had been sitting by myself and he had taken it upon himself to come over and talk to me.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTeCXr1ZkyE
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4glatqMeA0
We had been inseparable since that night, when he asked for my number, and we’d constantly texted after that. I never told him about my dad, or my mom and her drinking problem, and it was supposed to stay that way, at least for awhile.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKVSBY2hqt5
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0K0ZTMh4zj
“I have to go to a new doctor,” I said into the silence. I wondered if he even cared about that, or if he thought I was crazy for even going. “My mom said she made an appointment today.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBB3fLA1PvO
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“I didn’t know you were seeing a therapist,” he said softly. The couch shifted as he moved off of it and crouched in front of me, reaching to take my hands. “I’ll go with you, if you want. I know it’s scary when you’re doing something new.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ3sgXJJYSb
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPFHOvnAJHH
I smiled slightly and leaned my head against his shoulder. “Thank you,” I whispered. I lifted my head to look into his face, my voice tightening from what I was about to say. “There are things about me that you don’t know, that no one knows, and if you come with me, you’re going to hear all of it.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieAioR9wvU
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRvFnWZ1Bc
“I don’t care,” he said, shaking his head. “I want to help.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0umGGrN2zh
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I sighed, wondering how he would see me after this day, if he would even want to see me again. I tried not to think about that as we walked out onto the porch, his hand on the small of my back.484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFJtb8ERDIh
484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCaN1qIgDL
“It will be okay,” he said. “I promise.”484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0HU2uwNlr5
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When I turned to tell him I knew it would, that I’d be okay because I had a good friend with me, he bent his head and kissed me. 484Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn5fG2AN41q
Penana
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