I woke the next morning on the living room couch, my head nestled into the crook of Christian’s neck. He smelled of sweat and boy, and as I exhaled, I shook my head. I couldn’t do this now, think about him this way. It wasn’t right.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiws4j0tkQO
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Slowly, he shifted and drew his arms around my body, pulling me closer so that my nose touched the pulse of his neck. I tried to untangle his arms when he cracked one, groggy, hazel eye open. He smiled lazily and blinked.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1OJJhhwpwd
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“You’re leaving?” he asked, frowning.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgWmKjVWEw
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“It’s morning,” I said. “Plus it’s my house and my mom should be getting up soon.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLrT6WKkxk
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“Kendall.” Christian’s voice was calm. “What’s wrong with your mom?”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90vNkQgrZN
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I glanced behind my shoulder at him; he was sitting up and looking at me with his hair hanging in his eyes. I shook my head and wrapped my fingers in my hair, determined not to pull it out under the circumstances.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbFzsiBdSbY
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“Nothing’s wrong with her,” I said. “Why would you think that?”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IVGJhSBNY
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He stared at me, his lip twitching slightly. “Please. I’m not stupid. You could have called if you needed a place to stay.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxOxkljGOl
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“This is my home,” I replied, my fingers itching to touch him. “I have to stay here, to help my mom. You’d do the same for yours.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZBjrP9lHH0
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He nodded. “I would.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyiRHXzGsf
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What he was going to say was, I would if I had one454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlC1BjKV5Ex
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Christian’s mom died in a car accident a few years ago, leaving him and his father to fend for themselves. All of this had been revealed the first night I met Christian, at a party over the summer. I had been sitting by myself and he had taken it upon himself to come over and talk to me.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVLR7CbfMG
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We had been inseparable since that night, when he asked for my number, and we’d constantly texted after that. I never told him about my dad, or my mom and her drinking problem, and it was supposed to stay that way, at least for awhile.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ69ss7DCHGU
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“I have to go to a new doctor,” I said into the silence. I wondered if he even cared about that, or if he thought I was crazy for even going. “My mom said she made an appointment today.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCFyFpgNdHT
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“I didn’t know you were seeing a therapist,” he said softly. The couch shifted as he moved off of it and crouched in front of me, reaching to take my hands. “I’ll go with you, if you want. I know it’s scary when you’re doing something new.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ40dwHfbtSo
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I smiled slightly and leaned my head against his shoulder. “Thank you,” I whispered. I lifted my head to look into his face, my voice tightening from what I was about to say. “There are things about me that you don’t know, that no one knows, and if you come with me, you’re going to hear all of it.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDk0NUTXpIu
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“I don’t care,” he said, shaking his head. “I want to help.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFP0EkZvTYg
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I sighed, wondering how he would see me after this day, if he would even want to see me again. I tried not to think about that as we walked out onto the porch, his hand on the small of my back.454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBLHzRBN5JJ
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“It will be okay,” he said. “I promise.”454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwWXHdb6muC
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When I turned to tell him I knew it would, that I’d be okay because I had a good friend with me, he bent his head and kissed me. 454Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3YCERUamv
Penana
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