It was a VERY strong wind that day, and I absolutely swear to god that none of it was my fault. Seriously, guys. It was the WIND that knocked my umbrella into that dork's face. And his coffee fell too, rolling away. I explicitly articulated my most SINCEREST apologies and how I was just as much publicly humiliated as him.
"What is wrong with you-- I'm Gabe by the way--," he took my gloved hand to shake before returning to his nuclear meltdown. "--And what is wrong with you, coming out of nowhere, a ninja slash cat monkey assaulting my vulnerability, battering me to a pulp, leaving me struggling within in an inch of my life. I have asthma, you brute. Precious people like me die from wheezing. How dare you."
"I am MIRANDA," I shrug at Gabe. "Guess I am TOO MUCH of a woman for you."1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfat6gC0ICz
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBHpHTrMdS5
With the last word, I STRUT away. A minute later, it grew apparent he won't let that happen. He ran to my side, stammering and BLUBBERING like a fool.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ4PKcxuH2o
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"Now, just wait a gosh-darned second here!" Gabe raised a finger. I kept a straight face when inside I just wanted to LOL. "You still owe me coffee-- and for mangling my face-- who knows if I ever see you again."1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppWwhZ07Nq
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwx6EABzdH
"I did not MANGLE your face! The wind did! Your face is not mangled, your face is perfectly FINE!" I huffed, realizing we stood outside the cafe. "I am being blackmailed and entrapped. I am not okay with it!"1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA86MpKv7KY
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFZzgWV2Kn
The clouds roared back, and rain shattered. I fought with the umbrella.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUq8SeLXthH
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"So it's a date!" Gabe shouted over the hysteria. 1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4sKBLOtBq
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmmtiXqlft
"NO. GOODBYE FOREVER." I stormed off into the storm, wrestling with the umbrella and the wind. It took until the stoplight when Gabe ran up at the moment the wind grew VERY strong again. I swear to god, it was NOT ME the first time and it was STILL not me the second time. SMACK.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1eg0hKZrN
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The umbrella slapped Gabe ... again. I SHRIEKED in horror.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEknagppGu
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"What is wrong with you-- ," Gabe said as the pedestrian sign lit up and chased me across the splashing street. "-- I think I'm bleeding! Am I bleeding? My poor mangled face. You may rob me of my coffee and my dignity but you can't get rid of me that easy, infernal murderess. A menace to society, I say! We are all in danger!"
"Then stay FAR away from me!" 1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ49LIMvC4tS
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVSkhG3HlW8
Gabe took my gloved hand, and at that moment our hair rose. White lightning struck -- shocking us both. We keeled over, tased and jolted in waves until it was over. We glanced at each other with fresh and cooked eyes. Smoke steamed from our bodies. Boots were knocked from our feet. We marveled that we were electrocuted and somehow miraculously survived. I nodded, "Okay... Coffee sounds good right now..."1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10qATu5Kjd
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡedgceZhKeb
"So it's a date, Miranda," Gabe said, pleased. "That is spectacular."1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡorHNg0us1e
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"It is NOT a date," I insisted. "This is strictly normal and boring. People get hit by lightning all the time, Gabe."1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPR0rYYBnMM
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"And you're buying!" He pointed an accusing finger.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqlsaBbYiMa
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkUttcyRhvT
"No, if anything it is YOU who are buying," I bickered. 1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvdOi8RzL0n
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ALbSVnyj1
"If I'm buying, ergo it's a date."1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkiTvOoONuC
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd4t32VJKX5
"NOPE. WRONG. Regardless of someone buying, it is NOT--"1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl7ryFqcN7P
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We got struck by white lightning twice and wound up in the hospital, in the same room, with a curtain drawn between us. We spent hours staring at the ceiling arguing whose fault it was and how awful the coffee were here.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQkHUHOyHVv
1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvqdyKmi9u
Then his voice stopped. I looked at the curtain, hearing a droning flatline. I tore the curtain back. He was off the machine, leaning in for a kiss.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfpOA1nXGrZ
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"Kiss me?" 1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpJr8QjVpo6
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It was so OBVIOUS he was going to be my husband.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHTlYzXPVo
So OBVIOUS he was going to be the father of my child.1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6p48KJDT62
Gabe. That sweet dork. How can I not love him? 1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttkxqW0x00
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"No, you kiss me," I said. His eyes closed, as if to melt.
In our hospital gowns, we locked lips. And the rest?1046Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5NhXmCMbDC
The rest was, as they say, a WEIRD love story.
