《A》 - 2 | Penana

未來得及思考辭職嘅事，第二日已經要配合公司出差，而出差對象係尋日嘅𨋢中人...

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喺屋企一落樓見到有人係車裡度響咹，其實有啲驚，不過周邊無乜人，應該係呠我。

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手機有訊息，車裡面嘅人影咗一張我即時嘅寫真，無存名嘅電話號碼，文字顯示—

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『你好新同事我係你老細』

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『上車』

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即刻上車之後，之後老闆一輪嘴講—

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「叫我Jason就得，你而家返屋企執行李，出差兩個星期，幫我貼身睇住同你出差嗰個。

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咩都可以報銷，同我氹到佢做完嘢之後返到嚟，唯一要請示同阻止嘅係佢想去好遠嘅地方，或者要撇甩你嘅時候，最好住埋一間房、廿四小時零距離睇實佢。

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我會隨時聽你電話，唔好擔心。」

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如果我唔係知道呢間公司做咩，同埋有簽僱傭合約，我會以為將會被人賣豬仔。

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真正嘅老闆搵上門，咁即係尋日嗰個啊係老闆，只係高層。

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頂…

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以我呢一刻係小薯嘅身份，得罪中高層都等同死得。

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「邊個佢？我尋日先第一日返工...」

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唔知點解有一種『中獎』嘅感覺，公司有咁多人唔會咁蹺嘅...

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「得㗎喇你夠醒目唔洗擔心，我唔知你有冇國際車牌，今次唔幫你揸車，啊千祈唔好畀佢飲酒同揸車—」

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老闆真係老闆，四兩撥千金，完全唔想解答我嘅問題，唯有再問一次。

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「其實係邊位我需要陪？」

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佢把口終於停一停去諗應該點樣解釋：

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「游亦然Avery，你尋日話人被人杯嗰個，佢而家仲未知自己要出差。

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你快啲去執嘢我要車你去佢屋企，然後再車你哋去機場，快啲去執行李～

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嗰度天氣同呢度差唔多，去到先買衫都可以報銷，你自己安排。」

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唔怪得要諗喇，佢同老闆好熟喎...

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我係咪應該開心我無被人炒，同可以貼身照顧人，無禍從口出。

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出差係死刑，判咗死緩畀時間我補救，萬一照顧得人唔夠好就死刑即時執行被人炒...

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咁仲有得補救，又可以去學嘢，唔好咁快放棄啊顧啟意！

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糊里糊塗返屋企執行李，同工人姐姐講聲要出差，然後同老闆一齊去到人哋屋企，人哋未起身，老闆好積極話佢去煮早餐，我要去叫人起身...

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普通同事，剛入職，入屋叫人起身。

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開始理解點解尋日某人話佢唔鍾意有人同佢講嘢，老闆帶返咗一日工嘅職員零邊界感登堂入室，換著係我都頂唔順。

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一開門就見到人坐係床邊睇電話，佢見到我嗰刻有啲愕然，拉一拉張被。

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佢有著衫，可能怕凍。

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當然我之後先知唔係...

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「早晨老闆佢係出面煮緊早餐...」

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好尷尬，我好似做咗虧心事被人發現。

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好彩人哋無對我發脾氣，反而係疑惑另一樣嘢：

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「我屋企無嘢食可以煮。」

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同佢一齊行出房，見到老闆拆緊外賣，一見到人出門口手忙腳亂想收埋，趕唔切只可以賠笑應對。

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人哋無講啲咩，行去廁所梳洗換衫，我幫老闆拆外賣落座。

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人哋梳洗坐低食嘢，食夠先出聲問問題。

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「做咩帶人嚟。」

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老闆一直怯場唔出聲食嘢，同我問問題嘅答法唔同，佢面對中層時答得直接好多。

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「出差。」

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「唔去。」

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對方秒答，老闆同我差啲濁親，點解佢可以咁快手直線得罪老闆，我會想學習呢一份勇氣。

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「大嘢，你要去搞。」

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「唔去。」

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「要去。」

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呢一份無勇無謀勇氣都係唔好學，老闆臉色陰晴不定，最後放棄說服佢。

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我衰為食安安靜靜食少少嘢都有報應：

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「我洗唔洗幫你打埋辭職信。」

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同我講呢啲嘢做咩啊大佬！

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呢啲時候你先記得有我坐係度...

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「吓？我唔知咩事...」

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唔知佢記唔記仇，關係係必須即時撇清嘅，我要份工唔好累我。

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估唔到老闆有良心救我：

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「你想辭職都得，要一個月書面通知，你屋企無打印機，你又無其他同事聯絡方式，你點都要去咗先。」

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哇老闆點解可以咁熟悉佢，將『無人無物』呢四個字，放係佢身上發揮得淋漓盡致。

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本來睇唔到呢場交邊個贏，因為另一個參賽者表情無變化，又無駁嘴。

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「我可以完成工作，但唔想見到佢哋。」

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需要係意料之中嘅下位者妥協，但又唔明一直處於上風嘅佢點解會揀低頭，睇得出老闆都唔敢夾硬嚟...

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老闆收起嬉皮笑臉：

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「可以，我可以幫你避免同佢哋見面嘅場合，但人一定要到，嗰邊嘅規矩係要人到先接受方案。」

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係老闆嘅角度，呢啲算唔算揸頸就命？

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睇唔明，但唔好拖我落水。

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點知下一秒：

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「你返嚟，我幫你安排一份工，有三倍違約金，你而家幫我同你自己遞辭職信。」

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屌大佬唔好搞我，真係呢個時勢好難搵工，我唔想留係屋企！

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今次老闆唔救我，佢想睇吓我有咩反應，我可以有咩反應...

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「我尋日先入職，辭嘅話即日就辭到工，邊個陪你出差。」

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正經回應後得到中層經過大腦思考嘅回覆：

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「咁...你行程最後一兩日辭，而家幫我聯絡人遞信。」

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我輕輕點頭繼續食嘢，老闆忍唔住要刷存在感：

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「你當我死㗎！係我面前慫恿我員工辭職，你...」

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「夠你直接安排我離職咁盞鬼。」

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哇...

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道行唔夠嘅我，真係玩唔起呢種信任遊戲，萬一老闆係真係你離職而咁安排...

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唔知佢哋會唔會考慮成為現實生活、愛情上嘅天生一對人選，CP鎖死。

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「我邊有...我只係抵受佢哋嘅金錢同屋企嗰個嘅誘惑，你原諒我喇～」

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老闆唔好咁喇好唔好，唔係收錢做你員工就頂得順，會嘔㗎。

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睇到游氏嘅面不改色，我學唔嚟，點解佢會頂得順？

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「睇情況，食完未，幾點機。」

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估唔到老闆呢一招氹得掂佢當無事，感情真係好...

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普通老闆員工、上司下屬，有啲咁難頂嘅情節嘅咩？

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如果到係我身上面發生，一定會辭職。

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「夜晚機，放心大把時間～」

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我望住老闆心虛表情都有啲嬲，早講可以慢慢嚟，咁早開始要對住你兩個嘈交，你估唔驚㗎！

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「改早啲。」

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「唔得。」

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「咁你返去先，唔想見到你。」

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中層英明，好鍾意佢有咩都會講出口，唔怕得罪人。

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「好啊，你哋一路順風～」

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老闆鬆一口氣再鬆埋人，真係好服佢哋呢種算係老友嘅相處模式，換個人真係接唔住對方嘅廢話裡面嘅意思。

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結果我開始準備食多兩啖時，先發現人哋已經放低餐具問問題。

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「你叫咩名？」

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算佢係中層，對我尋日嘅表現唔上心係正常。

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「Ace顧啟意。」

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唔係喎老闆知我尋日同佢講咩，佢本人其中一個需要備註嘅特質，係咪會記啲唔記啲...

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「我唔係啲咩易服侍嘅人，所以唔洗服侍我，去到你旅游就得，我有需要會叫你。

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錢、食嘅，電子嘢歸你管，我唔會理，食嘢好食地飽就得，唔洗幫我安排太多。

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仲有，呢張卡你拎住，我私人畀你嘅獎金，有啲嘢到時可能要麻煩你。」

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係我諗緊咩叫『食嘢好食地飽』，餐餐快餐店得唔得？

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儲分換公仔嗰啲得唔得？

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如果得嘅話，以後食飯預埋佢，好快可以儲分換到特別版公仔。

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見佢唔出聲，我又無為意，只能反問吓佢想講咩。

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「咩事？」

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「扮我另一半，唔洗身體力行嗰度，行行企企就得。」

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餐具被掉落檯，餐具同張檯會唔會好易爛同花。

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大佬玩咁大，返工要出賣自己？

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「可以嘅咩？」

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明明講呢啲嘢嘅人係佢，佢平淡好似無事發生咁，係我好大反應。

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「吓？」

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我組織咗好耐語言先講：

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「我哋點睇都唔似係埋一齊嘅人。」

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委婉佢聽唔明，要直接啲講，佢嘅認知同我有一定差距，佢想要啲咩都要講多啲先知我會唔會抗拒。

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「唔知你講咩，總之我需要有個人阻止其他人煩我。」

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屌佢真係聽唔明唔係扮...

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我終於聽得明，必要時介入上司感情，成為一隻專業工作兼愛情擋箭兵。

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上司老闆通病—

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我唔知，但我要。

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