204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVlr2lZpzT
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrKQtvpqrG
和喜歡Kelvin的女生進行了一場不愉快的對話後，我便到了學校門口會合Kelvin：「行得。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfwhCCJ07DG
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4uJozPN0RX
「咁耐嘅？」他問。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvQ01PJrEd
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnnzXk8XY0t
「嗯。」想要放鬆心情的我說：「不如今日去掃街，肚餓想食啲嘢。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEp0MlQiwZ6
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCBCC8EmJQ
「好阿。」Kelvin和我並肩而行。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxp9PMNnh7y
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFVkfX5bE3E
這不是我第一次和Kelvin單獨放學，可是我的心情竟然緊張起來。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKqPteTqUv
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgiRdCYTr7G
自從被同學懷疑我和Kelvin、古榮的關係後，我的心便不再單純。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03HTg8O5en
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL7dHFoO671
我開始思考，難道我對他們抱有愛情的感覺而沒有察覺？到底怎樣才算是愛情的喜歡？204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEP6wFvo6UA
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50VpaBwfPT
我仔細打量Kelvin的側臉。他有一顆性感喉核、單眼皮、微卷頭髮、手臂有因為勤力做運動而得來的小肌肉、永遠不願穿得整齊的校服。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQdu7s5gVJ
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ4EvDZJ4j3
我第一次有這種想法——每天見面的Kelvin外型其實不錯，能夠和他去掃街真幸運。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2n53p9W2Vg
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrEeOSTInB8
人的想法很微妙，明明沒有事情發生過，我跟Kelvin本來就會相約一起放學和掃街，只因為幾句說話便能扭轉一個人的想法。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqn6t1pI6Ae
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJ8Vo0xmBC
想法塑造習慣，習慣就是生活。一個人的想法非常重要，光用腦袋便能改變自己對世界的觀感。難怪校長時常訓話，學生必需留意自己說話的用詞。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QZYXg9lpw
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡex5Gfssnmf
爸爸吸毒後會有這種感覺嗎？生活過於苦悶無新意，對身邊本來平平無奇的東西，從無到有，誕生了快感。就像吃完精神鴉片，內心一陣飄飄然。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwQ21oKImMf
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEf8WCmikk
「喂。」Kelvin打斷我的發情，還伸手摸摸我的額頭：「你係咪唔舒服？塊面咁紅嘅？」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtNPqaeP39
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcEUpCtYeKB
「咳咳⋯」我因為吞了一半的口水，嚇得狂咳。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcTp9QY7Jhd
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKCJhVtB3Ei
Kelvin拍拍我的背：「洗唔洗早啲返屋企休息？」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcKmxobNl7
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzzrW4ZhSBH
「唔洗。我吞口水唔小心瀆親姐。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1ZWCszj4J
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz6acpQYliB
「咁蠢嘅人都有，你陣間食燒賣小心啲。」說話一啖砂糖一啖屎是Kelvin的特色。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdm9kZ4VmOP
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQMhlnsXBW
我站在Kelvin旁，一邊吃撈麵，一邊等待著我的芋圓鮮奶茶。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn2GZoZaknI
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjsHjokSV0j
腦中是各式各樣的幻想。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF1XT40XHuh
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VyYsQUC43
如果我跟Kelvin談戀愛，會一直感受到這種飄飄然嗎？204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMDDxTNUar
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqO1P0HxrQ
如果會，戀愛似乎不錯。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡagilxB1luG
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42NqA8zbnr
「琴日睇新聞好爆阿，韓流巨星宣佈退出樂壇。」Kelvin說。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiicI12CT38
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBdsveS63v
「係咩？我無留意。」我通常聽本地音樂，對外國音樂不熟悉。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tJRZPWFtZ
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWTGyrvP4x
「原來佢做龜公，開間酒吧做毒竇，仲有堆明星朋友喺Group share落藥迷姦嘅片段，好痴線。」Kelvin說。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnmq6ttgsun
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt9YbsG4xTj
「咁癲？佢好似都幾紅。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKb5dwi4jCk
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MrHJOvCcf
「真係無樣睇。好彩你唔迷呢啲韓星。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUOSodiTHf
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡue65edaq8P
「點解咁講？」我問。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzkL6S5x9Z
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxF9yfDm7xw
「鐘意埋啲衣冠禽獸就傷心囉。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yB42r8OBt
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcB08oTbvf
「我問你一條問題阿。如果你識人吸毒，仲會唔會同佢做朋友？」Kelvin的話題讓想起我的爸爸。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCvA163CaFl
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBSOTashvD
「唔會，我唔會接受。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJgAAwx2hsO
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKe9GyrqObj
「如果係你朋友嘅屋企人吸毒呢？」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEnECbjb7O
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyBh7QDl05V
「咁就難講。」Kelvin說：「佢出入屋企品流複雜。我會盡最大努力幫佢，等佢唔好誤入歧途。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vWGZHzm9u
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGz3k3rS1Ec
我從來沒有嘗試幫助爸爸，鼓勵他離開黑社會：「屋企人吸毒，唔係朋友本人吸毒，唔代表會誤入歧途嘅。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq90JBcyrML
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMB36XxHog
想來爸爸也是身不由己賺錢還債，以他的能力除了保安、洗碗也沒有工作適合他，沒有站在他的立場勸喻也是種偽善。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrOhklFbd0U
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPEnOYtz6Bp
「係好容易呀！如果你老竇喺房食冰隊草，你喺廳都會聞到啦，毒品喺你眼前，又會心郁郁想試。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOpVDfNytBJ
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMHjbFWmhw
「你唔係好鐘意幫人㗎咩？」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitXLFFI2SJ
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeFFaD3XEL
「阿婆行動不便，點可以相提並論！吸毒對我嚟講無咩討論空間！你話我歧視都係咁講，同賭錢一樣，無人拎住支槍迫佢，累己累人。幫過對方拒絕就算，連朋友都唔會做。留返俾專業嘅機構幫手。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1yCVNGjElW
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8y83WW1GiD
Kelvin的說話打破了我和他戀愛的幻想。跟正義的Kelvin坦白父親有吸毒習慣絕對是一件自掘墳墓的事。他會討厭我的家庭，管東管西，而需要倚賴父親生存的我在成年前也無法解決家庭背景的問題。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnkMmTfBXE
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaohIHE3osI
他無意的批評讓我內心不舒服。我是受害者，也很討厭自己的家庭阿！可是家庭的影響一直都在，它就像一道封印在身上除不掉的詛咒。無論是自己、抑或他人，同樣避之則吉。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2Vj9qHdCK
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmFTV11fY7g
我寧願沒有開口詢問，沉醉在五分鐘前的粉紅色泡泡裡。我忘記了我和Kelvin是對難以找到共識卻常常一起的朋友。現在的我失去了幻想，變得更自卑了。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLGRFDuOdn
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxYjrLpKOxf
我和Kelvin的關係並不穩固，他會隨時離棄我。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR6T3w7hmJc
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxKFt2bEJsg
婚姻的承諾都能推翻，更何況是乳臭未乾的戀愛。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlst4FeRvP4
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWX8R1IGWI0
「點解人係群體動物？點解人要互相來往？」我喃喃自語：「係自私，係計算？兩個人，一定係有利益先會走埋一齊。世界上根本冇無私嘅愛。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOxi2JxThu
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡinDJoZf9Tt
「咁功利，一齊開心唔得咩？」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVtWARNpdW
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5xLt0GbsWP
「開心都係一種利益。可能對方人緣好，帶自己去認識朋友；可能係對方博學多才，學業上幫到自己；可能係自己孤單，想有人陪伴自己。總之就係因為利益開始，互相需要，到咗某一日，唔再幫到大家，就自然分開。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRp69DvHaP3
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSeFtgIw38F
我為未發生的事情擔憂。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsW80oIOpb0
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2fpZ00fJg
面對關係看得見的分岔，倒數著珍愛的關係終會消逝，無力感擴散。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0OSzvDZPW9
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnZ8yfuDty6
「你今日做咩事咁多愁善感？」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgDzwZWoZw
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyoDWIkbpiz
「無呀。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojaBvEuLbv
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXiBQz3GXR
「我知啦，思春期！中二病！」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEMee5Bqnsq
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEWiywl6Ix
「唔知呀！你話係就係啦。」204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDoZ7YImed1
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfBiS7O0nLw
人生就是各種徒勞無功的零碎。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwKlX9FGrc
204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEV9ao5aQe
難過。204Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10o9iRWB4K
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