次日午飯後我就去見工了。308Please respect copyright.PENANAqTm7lu8B07
308Please respect copyright.PENANA0oTRccXOur
「誒…你好,我係鄧浩仁,想搵蔡姑娘呀。」社區中心門口個姐姐仔都幾索,但有啲西面,吩咐我坐一陣就無視我了。308Please respect copyright.PENANAmUDOQmcCME
308Please respect copyright.PENANAuQzK7qajBF
「鄧浩仁,入嚟房傾吖。」看似是肥婆蔡的女人叫我,她其實不算肥(相比起肥直和我),只是較為豐腴,有啲肉哋噉,出乎意料的頗為年青,看起來只有三十多歲,極其量也只算是中女吧。308Please respect copyright.PENANArYMClMXZbG
308Please respect copyright.PENANAB7hOPakMgK
「你幫咗我哋大半年,都係第一次見面咋喎。」肥婆蔡長著plaza面,仲要戴橢圓形眼鏡,一副管家婆面相,但開場白都頗為客氣。308Please respect copyright.PENANAPC5WCFuvfd
308Please respect copyright.PENANA5niKmh6FVe
「哦~係呀,蔡姑娘,我都係第一次嚟中心咋。」由於肥直直接幫我搞晒註冊和登記出糧戶口等雜務,所以我從未在中心出現過。話說以前兼職炒散,手續比較簡便,起碼無「強姦金」呢啲搵笨實嘢,真係畀個名同戶口出糧就𠶧。308Please respect copyright.PENANACfeBEiZceW
308Please respect copyright.PENANAwdiNs7DHzW
看著我帶去的學界比賽和拯溺證書,肥婆蔡的樣子有點迷茫,我賭佢根本唔識我嗰啲係乜嘢證書,果然她開口問我:「鄧浩仁,不如你解釋吓呢啲證書代表乜嘢吖。」308Please respect copyright.PENANAlgXvnfF1Tq
308Please respect copyright.PENANAh4J2G8POm9308Please respect copyright.PENANAf38jv449gK
308Please respect copyright.PENANAHyDn6F14TQ
(嗱,大家唔好以為我吹水吹上腦嘞,真人真事有證書有真相,今天回望原來我小時候在水系的履歷是相當不俗的,只是慣性被老媽睇死、被女友(老婆)丑化而已,哈~)308Please respect copyright.PENANA9faCtGjh1n
308Please respect copyright.PENANAd57FV3ypRm
(當然勿要跟阿里仔等天生明星相的高、富、帥比,先天和後天都贏在起跑線才是真正的人生勝利組。想去奧運?要錢、要父幹的~今時今日都是!)308Please respect copyright.PENANAKHsLpx3EOQ
308Please respect copyright.PENANAR2jmS6ri60
「哦,黃色嗰兩張係學界比賽嘅冠軍證書,其他就係拯溺嘅證書囉。銅章、磁章就係泳池當更嘅資格,銅十字同銀十字就喺沙灘當更嘅資格。」我自己都是第一次這樣介紹,事關以往人家一早都知這些證書的級別。308Please respect copyright.PENANA4iKbMe4kJU
308Please respect copyright.PENANAgM4mXTc6nO
「嗯~但個班只要求有銅章就可以囉喎,你有4張拯溺證書即係代表乜嘢呢?」肥婆蔡問了一個相當低質的問題。308Please respect copyright.PENANAXzPjnt6AC1
308Please respect copyright.PENANAbAMOh7YUz9
佢真係唔識㗎喎,即係代表乜嘢?!兩個字——猛料囉你鹵味。308Please respect copyright.PENANAwVUdT4rsEN
308Please respect copyright.PENANAtc50rSYjWX
「誒…銅章即是我啡色呢張啦,其實係最基本嘅,噉其他都係比較高階啲囉,有時候有啲會所或者私人泳池會要求個救生員有高啲功力嘅。噉如果要去沙灘做,就要考十字證書囉,就我綠色呢張啦,香港都有私人沙灘請人要有高級啲嘅資格㗎。」雖然我盡力解釋畀佢聽,但我感覺如同向街市賣魚勝解釋一樣,唔識嘅點都係唔識。