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「去哪？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrQSxgsuiu
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhWmvqcLCEx
「急事。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IOonzCwvH
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ740rz2kfXG
「你不吃晚餐？」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrc3yN5H5h
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97O8kz5uGH
我沒應答，逕自出門。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk7sNvPy7Pe
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEx3HmipHl
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手，不協調感令我忐忑不安。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTBFxbaaaOR
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtKAc0Cf1m4
難以言喻的鬱悶。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPlCamAQ8gP
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ZDwwFXLqL
長嘆。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieyal6Nba7
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOiU7gdpa1z
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5s6gBKcMCI
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANfHkw19D1
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品，熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按，然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉，過目即忘。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFkj9LvKXEP
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcuaBgzKPp
「不需要贈品？」她驀地抬眼，與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎？357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0LXm7kq7o
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr6DD0fRtxv
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口，連忙接過香菸和肉乾。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBiB1vbbBCP
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0uPPqXOUO
她假笑，沒再搭理我，拿起抹布四處抹。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCKrx5g9xEm
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3m1Z3ARlU
我走出光線充足的便利店，重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7g4XggubQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqUgdpYaxY
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑，另一種不安。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0eDt3wOQo
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFE80rfINVP
櫥窗五光十色，路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序，不約而同在紅色燈號前止住，然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇，一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣，不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnKjNyWYDQ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpRPsrIxIhO
心血來潮，我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuNxpo80yqd
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6giv93NbMo
污水，雜物，廚餘，鼠餌，坑渠。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPs2Ag1ugyY
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB84ucASEAd
髒，亂，腐，毒，臭。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxqv9GuaEb
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHcnqLHd80
為何要到這種地方來？不是捷徑，不知盡頭何處，不懷目的……357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXrHIc5okLk
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIWsjHlBP8
小巷盡處是另一小巷，盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路，走又走。不停前行，像是正在找出口；絕不回頭，像是不打算找到真正出口。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lBL5gDs3z
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgraL33SIIl
厭煩日常走過的路，不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去，其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇，實質一切已成定局。那是大街，這是小巷。大街在明，小巷在暗。大街繁華，小巷冷清。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7avKgVSyu3
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6BivXhOby8
註定的。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfcWRnrhM5
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡotBz6QOomx
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼？我不相信，亦不願輕言不相信。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡseNdWlFIHZ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaMMfRhz27V
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUZPkKqgSzu
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlsrfAaqmmc
停步。猶疑。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcOo3w5Iwr
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSw0iqynknG
惻隱？慈悲？然後呢？根本沒有然後，因為我自顧不暇。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUKHulipRW5
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWutFdjkSZ
轉身。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUlrx9b4BNU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkgl09LwUn
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ79DLeoQeJo
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVAq5tJQGFF
我回身走去。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlnZfkG8iwq
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9WlT52L7t
惻隱？慈悲？不，好奇罷。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlGHP21lbU
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvJBrCcdj3
把小狗抱入懷內。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzQn3TQuoOk
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ExeoxxmgG
「暖和沒？」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06KduXwHV5
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5obP3Gyg8
陣風從後疾過，寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiFxat5z5Ce
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFUowI7Y1Rj
海風？海濱公園步道？357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOZG3LXdrQX
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbZY6lwr2zy
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答，但我需要溜達原因。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJjToqHW3YX
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw51BN6Q2gI
多拐兩個彎，我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來，恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄，純淨，圓滿。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6OYnshj1z
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SiTWXpZSd
「看！這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0mjypQoOEa
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXyxZdRpR4a
汪——牠回答，但沒有依指示抬頭。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyDQkEGWXg
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ySHGByy2e
「找個好地方坐坐吧！」為免小狗中途跑掉，我微微拉下外套拉鏈，把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗，甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部，方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹：「乖。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAskxQEvOLw
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvwXoPVJr5
銀月清冷，步道冷清，寧靜。心跳規律，呼吸有序，乏味。回憶很多，未知更多，迷惘。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjj7lFEEO5
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigWK2pzGqD
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller，跌了幾跤，膝蓋流血。明明怕血，明明怕痛，偏偏為保面子而強說無事，硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片，痛得要命，不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月，九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下，拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢，報答牠聽我發牢騷。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86sSmq5OIs
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfX3PiMQTGp
「留醫期間，我生氣朋友們不來探望我，打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後，我忙於學校課業，忘記致電他們，然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們，已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸，一吸一呼，虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了，無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過，不是說忘記就可以忘記。」357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYhyyFz1vM
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgk5AgZJwch
記憶零碎，思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多，無奈腦袋運轉不來，沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRNgSD6FKL
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpspEvnCBL
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味，舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊，甚至舔到小小鼻頭。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2mDMvdNRh
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5KbW5x56sQ
我笑，笑牠傻氣可愛。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnFj3wVHPhO
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoK6KDnA5T2
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡID0wXlGFlB
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡahWniwvQv6
鬱悶何來？357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuv9WJWEqTJ
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTqln3mNsp
學業壓力？愛情煩惱？家庭不和？357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzTAdk45vEM
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr8NmmasYAI
也許統統都是，也許統統不是。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTwWFdp9Bm
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0a0utn4pZp
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qF5M1al9x
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8SfBPXKm5
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrQFSfdVEe
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiOB29W2ral
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepmJcjwM13
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeOygBI18a
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼，我彈走菸屁股，將牠從懷裡抽出，來個深深擁抱。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIsrwkMqXn
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8zwjIQpOM
然後呢？根本沒有然後。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxZ4DjAU8g
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5tDF0rXkei
我輕輕放下小狗，動身邁步離開。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡss3PtarXnL
357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk9gmliuLn3
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾，自然而然不會跟上來。357Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqlY8M2wSIw
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
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