x
天亮，上班。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHR2BR4OhTY
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZQJryVBup
擠進人山人海的車廂，心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物，我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟，好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrl1g3LGV3
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GPdliJ4a1
車廂一如往常，平穩中帶輕微搖晃，教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲，繼續進食，令人側目。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1cPBAY18g
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡva8Iq5mHFe
食物的細碎，像沙子一樣，在人們毫不注意的情況下，悄然掉在地上，再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站，人們再肆意加以踐踏，令碎粉再度粉碎。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNBBOYciFR
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvqtvZZBZu
到站了，我有意無意地繞過人羣，「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉，心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上，我回頭望進車廂，想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉，但列車經已開駛。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjBWCIiiNF
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx4ZVvYfFKk
看不見，罷。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPx5L4RuUs
天黑，下班。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25YnP7GmYy
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVILlGAxzfj
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂，繼續講上司的壞話。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7EdQNYVD2s
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKwbCSB40Md
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYbuiiepEHK
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQbdUGoKd4w
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不！有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰？我看不見……我不想看見……251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflaon0ZBRM
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG72402bKzt
「啪」的一聲，男同事一手拍在我的小腿上，那隻螞蟻——扁了。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsS7Rm5E48w
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaEGJLxvFmH
「沒事了！」他笑了笑，問我：「你很怕小昆蟲？」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuf4PjNNBAh
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyvSZZJYhG6
「不，只是怕蟻。」我感覺到，我的唇還在顫抖，但卻仍勉力一笑。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbelIqvYRel
公司，午飯時間。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyHEeZmjyv
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLYB6Ijq5uZ
甲小姐正在上網看劇；乙先生在打盹；丙小姐外出吃飯去；丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒；戊小姐……251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZhTXk9Un4O
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4X0bznrP68
看著同事們的百態，我突然覺得自己和他們一樣，都是很渺小的生命體，小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事，尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌，不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎？那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別？251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkRzBFXNwF4
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIaLi0GRF0B
驀地，我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過，卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上，讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失，我感到自己也消失了似的。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4nr79t5sK
其實，真正的我只是一隻螞蟻，不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己變成人類，過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活，是有目的的付出，有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑，多奢侈！無他，這就是意義。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpm4fASY7zQ
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡazy5zCd1Ju
還是……251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkX2n5QcqX
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTeXhRqPZYS
其實，真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己是一隻蟻，過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味，只懂一味尋找食物。無他，這就是生存！251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe3i5eSmSZh
公司，工作。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgq9gHlQlHr
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0qULz3u7Rw
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdX1My1uxzm
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXgC3iwKcI
大家心知犯錯的不是我，奈何人是怕事的，只好把我推上斷頭台。事後，一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hbDFPD2Fe
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqLH9SFNqF
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWS7wA10Tjx
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqviBSjdTX
剛巧，一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmaQP1n99Yt
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN9mNK2EaRG
快意，笑了。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXXlldltBd
酒吧，喝酒。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBr8jmyoAO
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARSUnNio3N
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎？為何現在也怕酒起來？」男同事笑問。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYrwnPI4Ep
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyu3t0kgPlC
「其實，我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBdNpTFTzv
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSnsfwjHMi
「還是……你根本不會喝酒？」他哈哈大笑。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1JR0Bqq8DI
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTpQYxe9Sg
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲，我突然變得不大抗拒，乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvFhr4ir0K
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ7OYHLxeUH
醉倒。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQ89ARuujN
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLQkDltOzu
迷糊間，我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體，不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲，想要到它的洞穴去……251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZdERoTArm
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyW7EWaTuW6
「上天取走你的一扇門，定會留給你一扇窗。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8c6qQXRohx
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9rRtpgkI31
今趟，上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAFLbBoSZi0
假期，醫院。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVKvX87fAu
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpBIDu5CYER
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病，還未明確，因為報告要待下星期才會完成。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomLJQBWKHX
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpAkDrTCGey
看見媽的時候，家中各人都是淚眼漣漣，很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC03AKYWAfn
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRGJ4Iln4d
「我覺得……」近幾天，媽的話都變得斷斷續續：「自己……」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTO6OwV0ge7
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KBVguOhPn
大家都屏息靜氣，深怕這是她的最後一句話。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ01BkA0kMBG
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDG8V5yQnjR
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音，輕如柔絲，但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkRxnyFJtK
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡec5n04GSwC
死寂。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1S4RzOmUkD
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQH0hm7BR5
出乎我意料，這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話，不論是肉體還是心靈上。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIFULYMFcj
回家，晚飯。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkuY8XfZ9rZ
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXpHqczPOdK
一枱六椅，異常的沉默。電視的聲浪，掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意，繼續吃。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyhb6C2tfR
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlaYO7I7I5
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子：「不如外出吃飯。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJlrMNC9gqk
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVzrpJcQZa
妹放下筷子衝進房內，甩門；姨低下頭來，但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見；婆呆了，眼眶紅潤；我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdVAhoElJr
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7k9k2YKsif
我心想：世界末日來臨後，地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻？251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjVbIpARoe
每次望著媽，心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣，彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvYJgwAxRr
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BtuJSyNf7
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑！就是因為她是一隻螞蟻，所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭，去減輕她的負擔。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWQHqr3DfXl
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBMA034pRB
久而久之，我每次一見到她，便會掉頭走。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJyL7RqlETH
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOWKCN6Z7m
但我知道，我永沒能走遠。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzyV6L4B91
男友家，床上。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyA5Lr0KETe
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TbfWkEV9Y
前奏後，男友進入極度興奮狀態，沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時，我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ3cJpLmIEx
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIc39tJHmv
産房內有一張床，床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了，是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示，她要生産了。不消一會，整張床上都是幼蟻，恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6JktVdIBWI
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xpOcIRV2Z
我驚恐萬分之際，耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音：「他朝君體也相同！」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5i1vtcyve
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWMObeAAFT
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮，於是更用力……251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL27PorfeZ5
舊生聚會，內地某酒家。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZJw95bsASD
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5F6xiib65
說也奇怪，舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意，說會給我們驚喜。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJQw6XCrk2H
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkm8samz68
「蟻宴？」我呆了，但逃不了。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwuFECwFvT
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTzdfxrip5g
「你有收看《天與地》嗎？」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRJuDpCLO1
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡASMcBJXrhQ
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼！」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveInU5r6fz
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpFeVoBphA
「結局何如？」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObp5WL0jne
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxe1s3l8tIE
「沒好下場！」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEr64Ryjyds
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRCh1HiypU
「對！沒好下場！」我在心裡重覆著，衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwDBe56dZQH
男友有很多恐怖的寵物：蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時，他都會放一些寵物在床邊，以增加他的性趣。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveYhJ6UiDk
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusZvO58WOe
今趟，床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後，我不經意的問道：「你的寵物呢？」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YEhrKSK8s
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcm4JV3QxYj
「在你體內。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKiW7x7pUDd
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE54Pj1vHkh
「甚麼？」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzTkvoeeFv9
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUAfwzDDmy
「蟻。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVU7OdRe81
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOLOOWsM0If
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTMrohPHH5
它平常會做甚麼？做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯，它會做的事真的很多，但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活！它最好立刻消失！251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqL3JqmjDH8
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBLedWW5Vwj
結果，我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3j8wRam8pJ
靈堂上，我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2VLAjckkGT
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQhvzZfOG1
「她真的死了嗎？」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊，但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrmsYD9d56
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHF2hkDfup
「誰？」另一聲音反問。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVr71vObRP
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡooLp79XmW2
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道：「她……」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoJku84dXk
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi8NpmaDeJF
靜。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpp6HS8vlil
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlcAHf7R8p
我回過神來，低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB9czXbBqt3
我：「我的耳朵有毛病嗎？為何會聽到螞蟻講話？」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhAdMNc7hBb
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0y6SYloqj
醫：「不。是你的壓力過大，導致有幻聽。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvwNThT9U22
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapPJ6ZTXMO
我：「我有精神病？」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJAMIoVV9Lb
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasFmTlHuJN
醫：「是情緒病。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZA9BRLr9Cr
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlYwd8MLOj
我：「怎麼辦？」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt1jROyYOcm
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡth3Srszo4N
醫：「我會處方一些藥物，你要按時服用；另外，你也要多休息……」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9aWzyohk64
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDsrhSPxiK
我：「謝謝醫生。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqmq6NjKeBP
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0id8uVUcZ0
醫：「不用謝。」251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0iVgrJ3yx
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGDUr74XeB
離開診所時，我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtAuDTRRQQm
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPEegqtwNHX
不，我走近細看，是「虫馬虫義」專科。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTa6qSyUGX7
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻？251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuuYCGYUUUI
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcYmN0GVJN
醫生替我作身體檢查，一切正常；251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaA7qzUcvDt
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8PLj6J9AU
男友向我解釋，螞蟻之說，純粹幽默；251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRb7W8Nwvt
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPbr9C44zE
同事都勸我休息，減少工作量；251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡssns90bS2f
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVFlby81aO
……251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFFJUmOD8EM
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4lnuEQb2S
「真的有蟻在我體內！」我尖叫，奪門而出，從天台一躍而下，肝腦塗地。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ3EuXtJyKy
251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmk2rl7hAh
臨死前，我看見那東西了——不是蟻，是……
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規，煩請創挑主通知，願刪文。251Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwcetHiQIh
