09.226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwI07XH1WEG
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKMo9Kq5Stq
課業繁重，人際不順，升上高校之後的日子過得並不能算得上好。但我向來是報喜不報憂的性子，因此即使是夏油傑，我也沒向他吐露半點不快。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVFEyNXUeF
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡicuL1Nmbaa
又是一日放學。我一出校門就看見夏油傑站在樹蔭底下，他自然地拿走我的包，一手牽起我，帶著我走往熟悉的方向。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP070lAGtHZ
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCLjMECkGt
傑。我突然停下腳步，輕聲喊他。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkftZEnA96b
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn9iVklz9TR
他回頭看向我，「嗯？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQiJEnCRnp
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbb8qmTPCN
盯著夏油傑額上溢出的薄汗，我墊起腳尖用手帕替他擦拭。要不我以後自己走回家吧？我問。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hD394OyK8
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTV68MrHkmd
「怎麼了？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqsXP1D2tA
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZ4gefVNkk
沒什麼，我搖搖頭，「太熱了，捨不得你等。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3JXTykQqv
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaMkp0J58xJ
暑夏已至，正是咒靈好發的時節，夏油傑的工作量肯定是只增不減。雖然我天天見他，很難察覺他具體的改變，但也不難看出最近的他正處於極度疲憊的狀態中。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhnReGeoJb
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EZshaPy42
「還好。」他言簡意賅地回應我。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOt4vGHNioH
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSTpwYTABB
騙人，你話都變少了。我說，「連你的瀏海看起來都沒元氣了啦。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBsJOzXhr6t
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdugD3OKIU
「……」夏油傑看向我的眼神逐漸不善。我連忙告饒討好，語帶撒嬌，「開玩笑的、開玩笑的──原諒我嘛──」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYH9LvddW2
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKE7nEefIvT
經我這麼一插科打諢，氣氛總算有所緩和。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAursSYU4T
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSq4FomBIo
不過我真的很擔心你，我說。又是苦夏嗎？226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90LFZPBSQT
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7mXGeZlyyQ
他說對。我對他的回答毫不意外，「那挑一天來我家吧？我們一起吃冰鎮西瓜怎麼樣？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3WJ6QmtEB
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodjbodibhd
夏油傑凝視我，他最後伸手輕撫我的髮絲，柔聲說好。我顯而易見地鬆了一口氣，近日的疲乏感似乎隨著他的動作一掃而空。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJj2ogAKcKT
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM3eyrGLvBB
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenLlIR8Vr4
「除了冰鎮西瓜以外，還想吃什麼？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1vSwzhzMhl
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6ME2546LY
「唔，綠豆湯吧。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1j2DfueELC
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPPl7143fkR
「好呀，那蕎麥麵呢？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxhXBs27j7
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VQVJLQrrz
「也要。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSgINX332kx
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1W82xrQT52
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjmy7k90CoM
圍繞在他身邊，我一路叨叨絮絮，像極一隻嘰嘰喳喳的鳥兒；而他背對夕色，看向我的眼神繾綣而溫軟。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtsNCUfaMv
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk5EGx9kCu8
我永遠不會忘記這一刻。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVAB7JF51c
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZcjV4j2Xp
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ZW1y6QGMw
從那之後我開始自己上下學──花費整整一個月的時間，我才終於習慣「沒有夏油傑在身邊」這件事情。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1pRF0UJZC
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbH6LKq73v
但還是難免想念。以前總覺得愛就是無時無刻的陪伴與關注，但在這三十個幾乎見不到他的晝夜裡，我卻突然有了新的看法。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2nlFjUfXf
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLHSkL4OV4
我開始將注意力擺放在夏油傑以外的人身上。下課時和幾個不錯的同學說說話，一起去逛喜歡的店家，假日偶爾約出去吃飯；放學走在熟悉的小徑上，我察覺到一旁的樹叢終於開了小小的花，是我喜歡的顏色。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQHYRs7d3EV
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqTpjiRieCo
流動的風、落下的雨、搖晃的枝椏、落入耳裡的鈴鐺聲……我的世界變得多采多姿。不再是只有夏油傑，不再滿心滿眼都只有他。我知道我還是喜歡這個人，但我的生活卻因為與愛人的分離變得更美好──而我就會在這些美好的瞬間想起他。想跟他一起坐在虹龍上，看每一場東升西落；想跟他一起手牽著手，走過長長的街道。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQLvBOH8Bt
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVnPamLPM0G
正因為聚少離多，所以才明白與他相處的每分每秒是多麼珍貴。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5irCv64XYF
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jors09Ukj
「分離使我意識到愛的本質。」我傳給他的簡訊上這樣寫著。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlSwZlPhXs9
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS7YpgWYNWd
愛是彌補彼此的缺陷，是兩個破碎靈魂的相擁。我眼看鏡子裡笑容日漸燦爛的自己，心想自己大概也擁有那種包容一切的力量了。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlx2jsHPhUa
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFnTEO9q3H0
「愛的本質？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ZlU0Qgci8
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0DHGXue6GO
「是啊。」我回應他，「我覺得愛是寬容。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrqKkQBjjH
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsuCOHGihs
放你飛翔，做你的歸巢。在你不在身邊的時候將自己活得出色，以最好的姿態迎接你。我想這是愛吧？226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbnFuQPfL8n
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUplzQx7rC
「……你說的對。」半晌，他回應我。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2nFzTuYqY
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXcRyIBuzq
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnaqaOdP1m1
再見到夏油傑的時候已經是過年的事情。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1FdGIFip9K
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGuv1hZmyZ
「新年快樂。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKfMJkFWNMl
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqmUBWjWd9M
站在我家門口，他身影單薄，臉上的微笑仍然好看。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuO173lGe5T
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWrsDVRMuB
很難肯定是不是錯覺，但是幾月不見的夏油傑，我的男友，我的愛人──他似乎變得很陌生。這個認知讓我有些無所適從。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6l6ayjQ6dZ
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyaRxtMmqNj
我看著他，最後只能擠出一個微笑。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqNp4J8mSTL
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRFVG9zUUp
「新年快樂，傑。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3QVLw9wN2K
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WdxvGGH93
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──或許關係就是這樣破滅的。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnmNuHTjqv
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10.226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOJafn94UD
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPlThAfaDXN
夏油傑向來很寵我。這點無論是交往前還是交往後都是。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwyiDHcEeck
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5MjN4yhss8
以前只當是他對於鄰居妹妹的愛護之心而已，又或者是個性使然──畢竟他從小到大都是優等生，名氣響亮到街坊鄰居沒有人不知道他；說白點，「夏油傑」這三個字就是父母們拿來教育小孩的名詞。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjB89vIRe5e
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwhLtvJXEC
還記得那時才剛搬家不久，爸爸媽媽出差去了，於是家裡又只剩下我一個。這種事對我而言並不稀奇，反倒是夏油一家得知這件事情之後，便隔三差五地喊我去他們家吃飯。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZKcly7YFr
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhh50CFhaM
我臉皮薄，不大好意思經常打擾他們一家，有時也會推托找些藉口婉拒夏油阿姨的好意。然而姓夏油的大抵都是貼心的性子，在察覺到我的難為情後，他們開始換各種方式明裡暗裡地照顧我。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb2pSZMYWDf
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4pGmrPcspi
而夏油傑就是那道讓我跟他們產生更多交集的橋樑。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKXdbc74Br
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡumgHmUM8Nj
我跟他差不了多少歲，每天一起上下學，夏油傑時常拎著父母特別叮囑要交給我的便當，然後笑眯咪地找各種說詞讓我收下──我覺得其實這對他來說大概算不上什麼難事，因為他很聰明。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtKEox8q8oz
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8p5jQsfK6m
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp1Urhhgsjs
隨著時間遞進，我們更熟悉一些之後，我也未曾深思這個問題。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ069xaXLNmr
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCcuM40Aqzb
我只知道他從最初我們認識的那時就對我很好。一直都對我很好。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuMvwtTIzx
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHkl4nHbDv
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv24jk07ILO
一推開家門就聞到濃濃的血腥氣。我拿著手機有些腳軟，腦袋空白了好幾秒之後只想到要打給夏油傑──轉念一想，他大概還在出任務也說不定，於是改成打報警電話。但就在我準備撥通的時候，夏油傑打過來了。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKAQsv6nqc
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXy6Hgh23Z
我連忙接起，不敢大聲說話：「傑……」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaXvq0QyP60
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRTnYkd1xf
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbjwESrqUO
電話那端傳來的聲音聽上去有些失真。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRSyLiYS8n
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPHtxJrVmT7
他對我說：不進來嗎？226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHWUba2e2G9
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51WDU3srT6
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJ7CfsrGoy
室內傳來的聲響與他說話的聲音近乎同步。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsaCwxnrem
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4j2Jd0gcsQ
前方客廳的門被緩緩地、緩緩地推開。是夏油傑，他握著手機的那隻手還舉在耳邊。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0KPcRubJT
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVgqj6y1Rf
正在聽電話那頭傳來的，急促的呼吸聲。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3wDNKDJsA
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03kDRvIsKP
「……不進來也沒關係，反正你走不掉的。」他用一種令人毛骨悚然的溫柔語氣和話筒另一端的人說話。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaICaKovaxJ
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOUOtGymeU
惟有那雙棕色的晦暗視線，自始至終都停留在我身上，從未移開。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxaYz2OXpU
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjToPoKPcQ5
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就在此時此刻，我才突然驚覺，或許不僅僅只是如此。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEKG2K2wIEZ
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我好像從未了解過他。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ymhFz3KSb
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQPS4afCn5o
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7f0p8uYHSQ
我站在玄關處與他對視。側過臉的時候，還能看見一旁鏡子映照出自己蒼白的臉孔和閃爍的目光。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRwN2WFe9L
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgz09rohxH8
「是你嗎？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSgbx7fTsP
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvk8iAN99H
是我──他用一種跟平常無二致的語氣如此回應。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9ee55iH2v
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzbmv8kq03e
「……我能問問為什麼嗎？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG4sGc2FCAu
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIspUsEBsyT
夏油傑笑了一下。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KTFVPpv2V
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZxRImFtUj
「我為什麼要跟猴子解釋理由？」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8sY4LyVOMi
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3CDShiv1Ri
──猴子。聽見這個尖銳而充滿冒犯的詞彙從他嘴裡出來的時候，我略感意外、又好像是意料之中地跟著笑了。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1A7P3wbnh6
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnVuA4m712
我知道夏油傑的性子並不若表面上那樣可親，他實際上是個慣於用上對下角度去看待世界的人；物以類聚，他若不傲慢，怎能跟五條悟處得來。他唯一和五條悟最大的差別便是他懂得偽裝，而且還裝得有模有樣，沒有人不被他那副溫柔的模樣給騙去。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6zRdZ88hV3
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqbqbShUeC
我想我也被騙了。擅自以為在他心裡，自己的存在和別人是不一樣的；以為他說過「他總是會保護我」便是一輩子的事情。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKX7COLSvq
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDH4jQD4kyo
我總是忘了那個「總是」，忘記自己不過是被選擇的那方，而他隨時可以將我踢出他的世界。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLbW143cu5
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ywNSnH6Zw
都說同類相吸，而我們不是同類。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKfCpwY7YH
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGMDK6sSNhc
但我早該知道的。他那樣的人。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsuuk7tOovu
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8OHkxkxuVj
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZ511fmVLo
攔在身前的手臂強而有力，夏油傑曾經與我十指交扣過的右手此刻正覆在脖頸，原先順暢的呼吸隨著他加重的力道變得困難。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIcSK3seUTe
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cD7jYiPZY
「你要求的。」他說，「明明可以不用這麼死得這麼痛苦。」226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5gaNgYLzx
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWwvea9NqlI
溢出的眼淚模糊視野。看不清倒映在鏡裡的畫面，也說不出隻字片語，連思考都費力，更枉論掙扎。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmFONXzA3w
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就這樣吧。226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBaQCrxFrlt
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226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rzK3CqcJR
226Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsGra9tfu8
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