And I am back. I tried to go outside with James, Peter, and Sirius. They were all having a party by the lake, so I decided that I should go with them. They said that it would be fun, and I needed something to take my mind off of… everything. It was kind of late, but I decided it would be okay. I brought my book and a few pieces of chocolate, so I thought I would be okay. It wasn’t okay. Merlin, I am so FUCKING STUPID. 248Please respect copyright.PENANAjd3j3f46XY
We were walking down the path, and everything seemed okay. I was feeling fine. The moon was mostly obscured by clouds, so that was an added plus. But then the wind blew and the clouds shifted and I looked up. I saw all of the stars. I always forget how many there are. And I saw the moon. Sirius noticed I saw, but no one else did. We were with Lily and a few other girls. He took my hand and squeezed it. I squeezed back. I was still doing okay. I was pretty happy with myself, honestly. I thought that maybe I was getting better. I knew, somewhere in my deranged mind, that was impossible, but for a little while, I let myself believe it. We were near the lake now. There were lights, and music. And, like any party where my mates were involved, mad amounts of noise and alcohol. James and Peter ran off with the girls, saying hi to the others who were already there. 248Please respect copyright.PENANAkPCxr9ZfOq
Sirius stayed with me for a moment. “Are you doing okay?” he asked, looking up at me through his bangs. I nodded. “Yeah. I’m fine. Go have fun, please. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.” He kissed me on the cheek and ran over to James and Peter. I sat down at the base of a tree and cracked open my book. I flipped to where I’d left off and got to read about three sentences before Sirius sat down next to me. “I’m going to leave you alone soon, but I wanted to bring you a drink.” I looked at him. He knew how I felt about drinking. It never ended well, especially for me. “Hey, it’s just some pumpkin juice. Don’t worry.” I took the plastic cup from him. “Thank you,” I said. I loved how he just let me do my own thing and didn’t force me to join in with the party. I am the most social introvert I know. Like, I’ll go to a party just to sit in the corner and read. I like to be in the company of people, but still be ‘alone’. Sirius climbed to his feet and kissed me quickly. “No problem,” he replied with a smile. Merlin, his smile. It made me just melt into a puddle. I watched him as he walked away, a grin on my face until he disappeared into the crowd. I went back to my book, slowly sipping my drink. 248Please respect copyright.PENANAGzd4K1lPbF
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I was so ready to just read, but I felt something hit my shoulder. I thought something had fallen from the tree. But NO! Something else hit me. Again, and again, and again. A small pile of pebbles started collecting on my left side. I finally looked up. There was a boy with long, blonde hair sitting up in the tree. He was wearing Ravenclaw uniforms, without the robe. “What are you doing up there?” I asked, standing up so quickly I spilled part of my drink. “Watching,” he responded in a deep voice I hadn’t expected. “Oh. Could I join you?” I had never thought that I would be the one asking that. Well, no time like the present. He gestured me up, so I awkwardly climbed the tree. I sat on the branch next to him, looking down at the party below. “This is kind of nice,” I said. He nodded. “Er, I’m Remus Lupin,” I said, offering my hand. “Xenophilius Lovegood,” he replied, shaking my hand. I nearly lost my balance, but he caught me. “Was that your boyfriend earlier? The one who gave you the drink?” I bit my lip. “Yeah. Sirius.” Xenophilius nodded again. “You two look really nice together.” I smiled against the darkness. “Thank you.” We sat in silence for a little while, until Xenophilius pointed up at the sky. “Look.” I followed his finger and saw a shooting star. Then another, and another, and another. A meteor shower. 248Please respect copyright.PENANAuKYoypaINo
I took in the view, but realised a moment too late that I didn’t want to look at the sky anymore. A cloud moved, revealing the moon. My eyes zeroed in on it. It wasn’t even a full moon. I had a few days. Or so I thought. In reality, my calendar of the moon cycles was off, and the full moon was tomorrow night. Yay. My breathing quickened, almost to the point where I was hyperventilating. “Are you alright?” Xenophilius asked me. I wanted to lie. I wanted to be fine. But I couldn’t. I wasn’t fine. I was a fucking werewolf. So I shook my head. “Okay. Um, I can…” His voice was drowned out by the ringing in my ears. I cried out in pain, thinking, NO. NOT TONIGHT. Sirius had been walking over to the tree when I screamed, and he instantly saw me, up in the tree. “Hey!” He called up to us. “Remus, it’s okay. Can you get down?” I bit on my lip, hard, tasting blood. That only made things worse. But, I could see clearer, so I started to climb down from the tree. I tried to mumble an apology to Xenophilius, but I could barely move, much less talk. When I reached the ground, Sirius took me back to our dorm without another word. 248Please respect copyright.PENANAG7ZQIBWV9L
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He got me into bed with a warm drink, and now I’m writing this. I AM SO STUPID. Why did I think I could go outside and socialise, especially at night? I just re-checked my calendar, and Sirius actually did some maths to figure it out, using a book about moon patterns. Yep, my calendar was off. Full moon is tomorrow. I need to go. I’m going to try and get some sleep before I go to the shack. I want to get there a bit early, especially because I’ve had so little time to prepare. Bye248Please respect copyright.PENANAEyhROzN69P