41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡarYTDocblO
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuR2YmyMSB
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqQHtR36p0t
0141Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGfTOCocHk
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZZtjjILw4n
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG688mIehK7
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8CCXViyFk
赤羽業一如往常的沖泡咖啡加奶精加糖，他慣於在這時候放空腦袋休息，即便是在這時候，他依然如此。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXeawfyAZaB
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2wPc1G9WGw
攪拌咖啡時他看見自己的倒影迴轉在波紋中，意外的竟可以清晰反射出他面部的表情，是一個相當平靜的情緒，他本以為自己會是一副靜靜發著怒火的神情，然而，事實並非如此。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHODN3Y53dY
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHk4cvOGM1D
和表情同樣，他的內心此刻也靜謐的像火種熄滅似的，只有一縷青煙騰空散去。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡioJ28koqlk
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPy2Jc9X8pH
他不禁想，自己比起中學時候確實是成熟了些——尤其在看到娛樂版頭條醒目的標語之後，還能做些和普通日常無異的行為，而不是在那裡懊惱與憤恨——自己單戀了十幾年的人和當紅女明星傳出緋聞，作為證據，報導還放上兩人前往某溫泉旅館時的同遊照片。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHraSbG8xn9
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtk5kALUiqk
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Hn15nziRj
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyneIRbFSeL
赤羽業啜飲著咖啡醒腦，明天他有一場重要的議會質詢，為了這場質詢，他能掌握的資料都已經準備妥當，務必成功達陣。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcylajKKw1d
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUHDJFtVC3
在迅速打著資料重點時，赤羽業想起以前看過的動畫，裡面一句台詞就是在說明成熟與不成熟的差異，成熟的人接受事實不再反抗，不成熟的人則繼續頑強抵抗。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FydHmOvZL
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBYMYP1hMVm
若然是以前的自己，肯定是會選擇反抗吧，然而自己並沒有選擇那樣幼稚的作法，大概就是成熟。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0MTP3SDoj
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRlnzIZfIk
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8OgrPgVu9C
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamXrWcy94P
身後傳來同事們閱讀報紙之後的各種驚呼，他聞所未聞，繼續著自己的工作。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJXLAlENEx
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfgnt42VxpO
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxSxNzrPvq
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkYj2vyLJj2
0241Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFHtT1CxP6
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKlmbRMiFtV
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDCKUgTNU8
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHukwv4IQX
過了二十五歲之後，除了工作，赤羽業經常回想的就是一些有關於潮田渚的相處片段。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo2nge3X6nN
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHzzN6QddnU
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUT29zOjqJt
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWuj6OMtAi
最初只是一個留著長髮、綁著馬尾、笑起來有些虛幻的少年，放眼望去很容易在眾人中淹沒的稀薄存在感，卻因那時的偶然，令他目光全然留在他身上。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM42I1xc2sg
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNboIhiU89
赤羽業從來沒有對潮田渚說過，他對他最初的印象來自於某個放學後的黃昏教室，當時他出了校門憶起遺漏了作業本，便趕緊回教室欲拿取，剛好教室大門尚未關上，他正要踏入之時卻被眼前景緻停住腳步——逢魔時刻的色彩渲染整間教室，在他目光所及之處的人，綁著馬尾，藍色髮絲裡滲透著金黃色，背對著他。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Ni964xxcc
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3vUeczWD6
彷彿愛麗絲的兔子洞，誘惑著好奇的孩子一探究竟。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmuSNpSI1k
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaEU5dCbNT3
日後，他經常回想的就是那樣的場景，靜謐的時刻裡，看著遠方夕陽沈落的少年。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMDwkmoGR0k
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfpHpoJWPM
假如那時候，更靠近些，或許便能得知少年那時在思考的事情了吧。 41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzxPFsRECuc
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn2FBroRKOJ
赤羽業不只一次地這麼揣想。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavgaG0EBX5
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfksStSDZip
更靠近些，也就更能了解少年了，或者，讓少年想靠近自己，這份從那時便持續的單戀或許就能劃下結果——無論是否如願，至少不用懷抱揣想，一驚一顫地。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa98ATBLasj
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhiR8X5CMdP
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt9sqrdg2V2
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDJC25fQGes
0341Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdybFn0Lksn
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNTrizTJJD
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuhRs9VbDUo
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AL4emtLVo
結束了一整天的工作，赤羽業走出辦公室時已滿天星斗。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAn7QnMXBBN
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUD0NcW1k9D
冷咧的風吹來，寒的讓人哆嗦，迎風而行的他卻忽然笑了，抑不可止的笑了，剝落了從早上就武裝的情緒笑了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBmMoRrs4UB
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTHcMp0ZSUk
隨著緊繃情緒忽然的潰堤，他感覺到溫熱的液體從自己的臉龐滑落。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Jbc5uqH6l
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPdOgbxiBW
他想自己的確是很難受，不然一向不輕易落淚的他怎會突然無法阻止地不斷掉淚，弔詭是自己臉上還是一副笑容，而他知道自己是真心地露出笑容的。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNp9yEj51W9
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpTU2gfPJSy
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxPioxcowA4
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUiB8vBlKR3
原來，再怎麼了解自己，終究還是會有無法理解的地方——就像小說角色因各種情緒的混雜那樣，他又笑又哭。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjw8bJufSEZ
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUDYbKetrk
而他以為自己不會。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8KxCn5pe1
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡicPwSrlsLU
他本來以為自己不會的。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirPuR3wBJm
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88VTqEZBuy
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjBirqebN7
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmb2bO88rHR
不過就是喜歡的人似乎有了喜歡的對象，而那個對象偏偏不是自己罷了，沒什麼大不了的。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFZxWnAJZD
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNAtzestCU
沒什麼大不了的，不是嗎？41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlYYwEZcDE
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7Ioy6Ee0f
不是嗎？41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXihFXfl04k
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKKqjEfPBH
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5ZDnfnuE5
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkX6Z6kooCX
0441Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡobbI9Yf9HH
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmAhbaONNP
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uHJRfBkwu
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlAFQEWDA9K
赤羽業中學之後常常會夢到潮田渚。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbYqO5WQv5
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpgI2wwE23
綁著馬尾的他，升上中學三年級之後的他，留著短髮的他。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVS31eXJOl
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4eqPBDHsa1
無論哪一個他，只要看到他，潮田渚都會露出笑容往他而來，並說著美妙的話語，是只能在夢裡聽見的情話。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrtbBwQrJXZ
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUfPGQkBNj8
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJR9ehRt9C
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGeknZUQYrz
所以，在住家周圍見到早上才在報紙裡看到的人出現的時候，赤羽業恍惚還以為自己疲累到走著睡著了——尤其，對方還一臉笑容的往自己走過來時，簡直重現了夢境場景。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKSzYUq59Ro
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8PxxCScKF
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwF0JtIjmA
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWM4wpzHEq8
「業，你今天好晚回來啊。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkbdc2HQmg
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zN68LFpMo
雖然擺著一張笑容，然而赤羽業敏銳感覺到那笑顏下潛藏著的疲憊。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpS72motukb
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPtKk1QiKZ
啊啊，是這麼回事嗎？41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjWPmjMx80
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQFUqFuQndj
難得的，赤羽業對自己洞悉人性這一點感到厭惡。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbY58wOSGb
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKo0woaaz6U
「明天有重要的質詢，所以剛剛還在處理。」他頓了頓，並沒想戳破什麼地裝傻「渚，這麼晚了，你怎麼會來呢？」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxkHRY1cOZ
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPIpSHFu2yK
「……原來，業沒有看到報紙嗎？」不知道是放心還是懊惱，潮田渚呼了口氣「今天我下班回家時，發現家裡附近躲著好幾個記者，大概是想來打聽些事情吧」言至此，赤羽業難得見到潮田渚露出苦笑「而我的父母貌似也被騷擾了，便傳簡訊讓我今天別回家去別處躲著，等過個幾天就會沒事了。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXupgESEWhE
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrddk34CkSk
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYx9H3y42ms
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡip1kIvxdVt
潮田渚的言詞閃爍，大概是有些顧慮吧。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrhpr1phfT7
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Q4syndFkN
他並沒有興致去讓自己受傷，因此潮田渚言詞隱蔽的那些內容，儘管他猜得出來，他也不想直接聽到當事人直接說出。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMn72Zp2Mr
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8kXSWaeCY
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9fUOTxzCiN
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRBdVG7ds5
「所以，你想在我這裡待個幾天，是這樣的意思嗎？」他直接點出結論。確實自己之前經常拖著潮田渚灌酒，家裡是有一些渚的換洗衣物跟被子。要是他是渚也會選擇一樣的事情，一來不用花錢住在酒店裡，二來也比較方便。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zBDRWBQoe
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghwCjTYkgq
「對，畢竟，我沒有其他可以拜託的人了。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIyv1rNu0P0
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5itO7zCMcy
赤羽業聽了之後直覺渚在說謊，然而卻找不出任何感覺奇怪的地方。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeZlcwLWul
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZESSIiJqn
要論交情，自己的確是可以勝任的，然而說找不到人可以拜託？E班的感情在共經患難之後，是非常堅實的，除了自己之外，渚還有很多人可以拜託，想必他們也會十分樂意的（當然，肯定包含看戲的成份）。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡolZq4Ti4Oh
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ239YSwqDWN
只是，渚的為難似乎也是真的，他似乎是真的找不到其他可以拜託的人——是以，才會沒有任何告知，就跑來他家外面等他，而他甚至不知道他會幾點回來地在寒風中等著。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAhaiVC3SG
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzYP1rwYu6
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhubvzW8FZK
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUX3HgFrVPC
「我知道了，你就在我這裡躲個幾天吧。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5QCsF4Ock
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4ilsweCgO
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkWRVaqRxT
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lZrocWR6i
赤羽業有時會想，假如記憶可以回放，那麼潮田渚在他應允之後的那個畫面，他肯定會重溫數次——潮田渚喜出望外地抱住他，透過衣服傳來的溫熱，他曉得渚十分高興，雖然他還感覺到更深層次的欣喜，而那個欣喜在之後才能明白。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOMYAyv2dC
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAzeq3j7wu
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXvV41p8ytK
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAqHjV4Pp05
當時的他僅僅是以為渚對於他讓他躲在他家裡這件事情感謝而已，直到後來發現誤會一場，他聽見和夢裡一樣的話語時，他才明白那時感覺到的謊言與欣喜的意義。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrl2oZdUFmV
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ybAVRRoRl
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuuOqS4fh78
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFpTuqXEdU
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJlAwo1WJfp
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJvdX2E4Wp
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrEpfGGLZpS
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtdDgXFmVPZ
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdApocxwEwQ
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdAxptRp37i
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjko3jj4eKv
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRVu84y0jd
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0PZ16sq0dB
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ht1l71ofd
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbotdxn6djJ
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgZMPFe1odm
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfc8ur2UJ6R
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5evTjhmbdS
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDWSzvDarq
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe8IrVKoCs
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCBl6qyZmb
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBs52b3l3DB
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtIh17vNOh
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLUS9CEOg7
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUX0uGED1Jh
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQn5uLbyeI
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY9p5MoXxl7
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHVKr7lj7a2
***41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuH3DQhAdyd
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCsWWYld5b2
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5WOqtDt0c
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡohnwRykOh0
「二十五歲時，赤羽業看見了自己單戀的人出現在報紙的版面上，那是一個和女明星緋聞的版面。從十三歲和少年相遇的時候，他這一份單戀就開始了。直到年老，他從來也沒說出口。沒有人知道的戀情不存在，所以他只是陪在潮田渚的身邊，他陪了多久，這份單戀就多久。六十五歲時，赤羽業還是陪在喜歡的人身邊。直到老死前，他都沒有說出口。」41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiO3g9uro9
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmUZckBAmw
以上是我寫文的最初動機與結構。以業的角度出發的單戀，只是，業對於這份戀情並沒有想放手一搏，以致於他和渚的關係始終在非常奇妙的情況。原設定中的渚也並沒有結婚，從業的角度無法知道渚的內心，所以並不能明白渚不結婚的原因。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dBfmjBnld
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvHOifDrSxg
不過寫文寫著就會出現慣性，所以最後還是回到不太遺憾的層面。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDKi5jtgap3
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAYPVMXWDOJ
以前跟徘徊討論過，對於業渚，業必須處於主動才能得到好結果，假如兩個都沒有意識到，儘管遺憾但也不太虐，然而一方清醒一方迴避，那就有趣了。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA9na7IvIVB
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtH0skrKnXB
這文章大概有涉及到這一層面的討論。41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ56xDCmwaTE
41Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOG04tP4POA
謝謝觀賞與指教！ns18.226.88.23da2
