->>>放人鴿子的尷尬該如何處理呢？任務尚未正式開始，天兵小人魚就起風波？
【凌家動物園 III 小強星人也求愛】爆炸頭不要來
By 喵芭渴死姬
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41-1. 誰是誰寶貝？1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡygpVeQQNm9
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『肉盾阿弗羅：老婆在忙嗎？要注意身體，別累壞喔～』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkW1JypTb50
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『肉盾阿弗羅：老婆～別忘了吃飯喔！』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpr5q0UyNw
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『肉盾阿弗羅：今天太陽好大啊，我快熱死了，老婆出門要小心中暑喔～』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPq6WinDxi
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『喵喵仙貝：倫哥今天也不上線嗎？OAO』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZNqsBFhZ1
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『偏向唬爛行：倫哥接電話啦！』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUmaJiWXWm
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昏睡了三天，一點開《奧普斯APP》就蹦出一大串訊息，席倫五味雜陳地一一瀏覽。原以為自己突然無故消失又放人鴿子，艾登會生氣不滿或變得冷淡，誰知對方不僅留言如常，還一則比一則瑣碎，簡直像兒子找媽咪報備日常，比如這一條——1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uB1xACAkU
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『肉盾阿弗羅：今天大塞車，差點餓死在路上，嗚嗚嗚～求老婆抱～ლ（╹ε╹ლ）』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwit9g7cynS
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又比如——1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR8nuv9VGsU
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『肉盾阿弗羅：剛居然被一隻貓踢了，哭哭～老婆抱～ლ（╹ε╹ლ）』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBSZc1uNNQ
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那豬頭做了什麼被貓……呃，這不是重點。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo1Mxz70G63
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席倫哭笑不得地將記錄往下拉，幾乎不是分享吃了什麼，就是報告一天行程，連路過看見什麼都能寫上一段。明明每封都有去無回卻也不曾間斷，這笨蛋到底在想什麼啊？1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYXFTefbKKa
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『肉盾阿弗羅：今天開會開好久啊，累死了！老婆累不累呀？再忙都要記得休息喔！來親一個晚安～(╭￣3￣)╭♥』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfx4aDbIcQE
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凝視著不久前的最後一則留言，席倫的視線不禁模糊了起來。這笨蛋是真沒脾氣還是太傻啊？1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqfSU2eEZOG
1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvbsGmTPYT
『肉盾阿弗羅：剛忘了說，今天吃了一家芒果撮冰好好吃啊！！！』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSZwJjohPM
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『肉盾阿弗羅：搓冰？好像也不是那個字，打不出來，反正是冰塊磨成的碎冰，老婆有機會要去吃啊！』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27iVVIMFus
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「噗……」忽跳出的新留言讓席倫失笑之下，手指不自覺動了起來，直到按下傳送鍵，他才意識過來，「啊！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ASTQG3OzU
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『塞倫：是剉冰，笨蛋。』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXwuuJ2gRq
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送出的訊息覆水難收，他秉住呼吸，不免有些緊張艾登的反應。等了不知多久，對方都毫無聲息，或許已經休息了吧。正當他要放棄時，就見畫面跳動了。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5WVTdduksJ
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『肉盾阿弗羅：老婆～～～～你終於起床了！OvO』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDF2UVKoMCg
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呃，消息傳得真快，難不成剛才沈默這麼久其實是在跟阿全他們通話？1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKD9uCpIAJL
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『肉盾阿弗羅：老婆上線好不好？我好想你～QQ』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsm69GgfKuN
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接下來是一連串的打滾哀求，席倫忍不住揚起嘴角，心裡卻也莫名地泛疼。這纏人的傢伙啊！如果艾登知道自己是怎樣的人後，還會這般對他嗎？1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡemcisUpGUv
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ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭￣3￣)╭♥ σ ﾟ∀ ﾟ) ﾟ∀ﾟ)σ ლ（╹ε╹ლ）1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Z1PNEIfP2
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「老婆！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4HGY0vmK09
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愛的傳送後，一顆爆炸頭就激動撲來，塞倫連聲驚呼都未能出口，就被熱火朝天的吻堵住，讓他差點在宅音系統顆顆笑的叮聲中窒息回復活池。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2NSbhpdCnx
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「唔……你……」不得不說，肉盾的吻技很好，令人沈浸其中，若是在私下，塞倫也挺享受肉盾的親密舉動。然而，他們現在不止是在大庭廣眾之下，旁還有一對腐女眼正目光如炬，另一側亦有喵語竊笑散發濃濃八卦味。於是，他惱羞成怒地一掌巴飛爆炸頭，「就叫你看場合！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhl1xx773V
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「哥太想你了嘛～」肉盾頂著只掉一滴血的血條和一顆腫包爬回來，繼續摟住塞倫的纖腰黏膩秀恩愛，「老婆，你最近都沒好好吃飯嗎？怎麼好像變瘦了？」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGEnEYH7hq
1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbfKQYAdvP
「這裡是遊戲，你哪隻眼看得出……喂！有人在！」塞倫熱辣著耳根，拍掉疑似滑向臀部的豬手，本想道歉的心情也全沒了。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tYRQAvmjp
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「好嘛好嘛，晚點陪睡再摸。」肉盾依舊厚臉皮地燦笑道。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXAUGmq2BY
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「噗喵！」窩在哥哥懷裡的小奶貓，賊笑地拍動兩隻小肉球似在打字，嘴裡還喃喃低唸著：「親親抱抱睡喵～」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQeFZfjHmM3
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「呵呵，摸完再睡。」唬爛也低頭腐笑地打著字，充分發揮狗仔精神。於是，系統叮了又叮地加了這對姊弟的八卦指數，還順便給肉盾和塞倫封了個《小別勝新婚》的稱號，兩人將全身散發粉色愛心一小時。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fiOk11Uww
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「嗚喔喔！這充滿幸福的氛圍，哥感覺渾身又充滿了幹勁啊！」肉盾熱淚盈框地仰天高舉雙臂，感謝上帝感謝主的讚頌完，就抱住塞倫感動哽咽：「有小倫老婆真好～」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oNgqrZVYm
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「你……也太誇張。」差點沒能壓住湧出的情緒，塞倫忍著熱燙的臉頰環視四周，發現他們五人正在朦霧島的傳送陣附近，便問：「今天要做什麼？」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdg92MRwyou
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「喵嘿嘿，倫哥好不容易上來惹，當然是要去找太師父呀喵～」喵喵仙貝喵聲說著，就翻了個滾仰著小肚皮，用肉球勾住哥哥垂在胸前的一束長髮玩。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cd9W80zta
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「找太師父？」這麼說來，塞倫倒想起自己上回寄去藥草給師門還未等回覆就登出了，便往信箱瞧去，果然見到一封擱置數日的新郵件，正是厄絲拉寄來的——1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JVy0eaL9L
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『徒兒，為師想問問你，前些日子帶來的那位半魔朋友，是怎麼認識的啊？』1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ52bMqnn4Gp
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這明顯是要交代新任務的徵兆，雖不知是否與人魚相關，但足以證明他的師徒好感值總算是跨過門檻了，可惜，塞倫錯過了第一時間的先機。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOx2sMSLCqE
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「吼，有人睡得天昏地暗，都不知道人類的人魚任務有大進展了。」唬爛沒好氣地黑笑。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwlpp1L0HQ5
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「抱歉，我沒想到會這樣。」塞倫尷尬地瞥了眼肉盾，小聲地傳了道密語過去：「對不起，今天失約了。」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgUhnbGjuQ
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「沒關係啦，累了就是要多休息嘛，小倫沒事就好。」肉盾抓著爆炸頭，依舊笑得既傻又燦爛。塞倫一聽，頓時心裡一顫。本還為碰面延期而暗自鬆口氣的他，如今見肉盾仍以自己的感受為主，一股愧疚感便不禁油然而生，對肉盾厚臉皮的摟抱親暱，也更加半推半就地順從了。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuJfd6hZIA
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始終沈默的泰迪熊冷眼掃了記他們，將貝貝小貓放進衣襟內，淡聲說：「入隊，出發。」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7v4ZnTVwdP
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塞倫聞聲，才知隊伍早已發出邀請，就連忙按下接受。他被肉盾牽著走去傳送陣時，越覺那冷聲命令似有敵意，便朝泰迪熊投去一眼，卻見對方正含笑逗弄懷中小貓，彷彿是自己多心般，不禁納悶心想，他該不是被這些天的惡夢影響了吧？1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGXjA32s0dn
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而實際上，當泰迪熊的命令一出，喵喵仙貝也愣地抬頭，用一隻肉球輕碰哥哥的下巴，不解猜想哥心情不好嗎？但見泰迪熊隨即低頭對他溫柔微笑，便又覺大概是最近壓力大過度敏感吧，也就很快將這事拋諸腦後。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfnrDYJHkK
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再次來到亞特蘭秘境，這一次，厄絲拉的態度不同了。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlEPNZoA9YK
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「唉呀！你果然是我師父流落在外的孫子啊！乖師姪，快來認祖歸宗。」一見泰迪熊取出蛇紋血玉，厄絲拉立刻歡喜地用八爪環住他，送上無數烈焰紅唇以示歡迎，讓某兄控炸毛貓氣得差點跳出來回送幾道貓爪。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYG5Z4Ttx6u
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「好徒兒，為師才要為這事找你談，你就把這孩子帶來了，真是幫了大忙呢。」照慣例也對愛徒塞倫送上幾道關愛吻後，厄絲拉熱情地領著他們來到白石廳，「你太師父出門巡視了，很快就回來，你們先在這等一等啊。」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsFfZhVKw6
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「呵呵呵，表哥剛那表情夠經典！」唬爛不怕死地欣賞截圖，還順手寄給其他人，以致於現場的噴笑聲此起彼落。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtwYFYtAuyR
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泰迪熊黑著臉朝唬爛瞪了眼，就聽見貝兒歡快的撒嬌聲於大廳響起：「哥，你回來啦？我好想你喔～」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbK2SrLmUxX
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所謂的弟控症，就是不論何時何地何情況，都能對弟弟的呼喚予以即時回應。於是，泰迪熊立刻下意識地抱住撲進懷裡的人，溫柔含笑地回道：「哥也是，寶貝……」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxsqhRiKk8
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「兒」字還未出口，他就愣得剎然止住，因為，不僅他手中撫摸的觸感是一片冰涼的鱗片，眼前隨水流飄揚的長髮還是許久未見的幽紫髮絲，懷裡的可人兒雖有張貝兒的臉，卻是十六歲未脫稚氣的青澀，更重要的是，寶貝兒在《奧普斯》裡的玩家角色可不是這模樣啊！1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSQcmyjofk
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糟！泰迪熊心驚地暗喊完，胸口就被一隻小肉球狠狠一踹。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbK7vfOyet
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「咦咦？對、對、對不起，窩認錯人惹！」不知是否魚類的視力特別差，貝貝小魚盯著泰迪熊的臉好幾秒後，才驚慌地爆紅著臉倒退，又瞥見泰迪熊胸前兩眼冒火的小白貓，頓時就被嚇得噴淚尖叫：「呀啊啊啊！有喵喵！鼻要疵我！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60tO4lEL5I
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奔逃的人魚轉身同時，如紗裙般飄揚的魚尾還不小心在他們臉上拍了幾下，就「碰」一聲變成迷你版小人魚，拼命扭著身子游進前方的小扇貝洞，小魚尾卻還在洞外晃啊晃忘了縮進去。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBMI2aUli76
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「噗！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoooM5NzLzQ
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「吼吼，有人完蛋了！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMa5fcNxjv
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「Oh my God！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGhw7z5PqP
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一陣沈默後，其他三人再次沒良心地放聲狂笑，完全不管某貓妖打翻醋缸的四溢酸味。同時間，宅宅系統音也顆顆笑地灑下愛心雨狂吼。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkja30PI51
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「叮叮叮！恭喜本伺服第一CP再次觸發奧普斯最狗血芭樂三角劇情之一《抱錯老婆上錯床》啦！玩家泰迪熊餅乾誤將NPC《貝貝小魚》認作愛妻而公然親密擁抱，被正牌妻子玩家喵喵仙貝捉姦在場，由於兩人積滿三次外遇類劇情，獲得《外遇好好玩》特殊奸情稱號，同時觸發特殊婚姻任務，歡迎玩家再接再厲開發更多狗血多P奸情劇唷～♥」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KSZnM21IK
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「P你個頭啦P！」沒想到身兼戀人的哥哥竟會連自己都認錯，喵喵仙貝氣得渾身發抖，立刻跳出來變回人形，胡亂拍打手腳就要往外游去，直想衝出秘境拿法杖瘋狂砲轟發洩。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb62YUObxcA
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「寶貝兒！」自知理虧的泰迪熊連忙抓住他拼命道歉，「對不起，哥不是……」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzueD3gLtMG
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「膩的寶貝在那！」正在氣頭上的喵喵仙貝，哭紅眼指著貝貝小魚的方向激動怒喊，一邊掙扎踢踹泰迪熊，聽不進任何解釋，多日來憋積的情緒也全數爆發，「走開！走開！我討厭死你啦！最討厭哇啊——」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMtmZZWgOFW
1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjXPkOzIoWg
「好好好，是哥的錯，寶貝兒不哭……」泰迪熊這下真是慌了，既懊惱自責又心疼無措，只得拼命柔聲討好心肝寶貝，什麼聰明冷靜從容優雅的形象一律蕩然無存。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUt0VCtfDY
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喔天！見一向高高在上的淡定大魔神這般狼狽，塞倫真是大感解氣，捧腹笑到出淚不止，腹部在劇烈運動下也越漸抽痛。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5QlKPrMXfB
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「哈哈哈哈哈……靠！快受不了啦！」已陷入瘋癲狀態笑的唬爛，忙不停手地狂截圖，「表哥難得吃大鱉，一定要拍照留念啦！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8dxYgd9oVL
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肉盾更是笑到抱石柱搥打，最後才試著勸說：「小貝兒別生氣啦，要怪就怪官方把小人魚做得那麼像，連我們都會認錯……噗哈哈哈哈！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRyvO7uZeJr
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喵喵仙貝更炸毛了，「膩閉嘴沒人當你啞巴！」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC6fyl7mgM6
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完全沒安慰作用啊！泰迪熊鐵青著臉怒瞪肉盾一眼後，開出情侶道具《野生帳棚》把喵喵仙貝拖進去，打算來場倆口子的私密會談。直到帳外的三人笑夠了，隱形帳棚都仍未有收起跡象，可見這場順毛工程之浩大。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqKRgDfdHj5
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「沒想到貝兒會這麼在意哥哥認錯人。」塞倫揉著肚子喘氣道。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwYUeSeNFJ
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「沒辦法，小貝兒就是兄控嘛，從小對泰很有獨佔欲。」肉盾也沒輒地攤手哀嘆。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNUPL66Md4Z
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「從小就這樣？」塞倫想了想，不禁有些奇怪，「雖說是兄弟，但似乎有些過頭了？」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZKVCOBXOG
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「對啊！我跟我大哥大姊感情再好，也沒這麼誇張，所以我才擔心。」肉盾認同地狂點頭。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv3YGacYNoZ
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「嗯……」塞倫沈吟著，瞥見唬爛一臉便秘似地望著他們，便納悶問：「你怎麼了？」1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWUGwOZjMO
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「呃，沒什麼。」唬爛乾笑地換了個表情和姿勢，卻一路朝憋尿風奔去，內心更是狂吼不止，靠啊！老娘好想爆真相啊啊啊啊！1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzCTImaGTec
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ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭￣3￣)╭♥ σ ﾟ∀ ﾟ) ﾟ∀ﾟ)σ ლ（╹ε╹ლ）
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後記：
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貝貝小魚喔喔喔喔～///艸///1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsLNUh5Aaps
泰勾超冤枉wwww1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1Yz1i7dow
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下篇將有事情發生唷～XDD1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYtiZ4iPlL
1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡELHysO2iMC
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【下篇預告】《突變》：太師父亮相，小倫有緊急狀況。字數約六千多字，禮拜二早上發。1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJcUGMRZdI
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★【凌家動物園系列】
1.花心豹吃兔計畫 — 付墨X凌小兔 （作品名：小兔不吃回頭草）1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQLjkyAD2y
2.大貓小貓相親記 — 泰特斯X拉貝爾 （作品名：恃寵而傲嬌）1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxQSeMIVS6n
3.小強星人也求愛 — 艾登X席倫 （作品名：爆炸頭不要來）1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6IrIuFpR1
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歡迎追蹤噗浪和FB粉絲頁>////<1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHfbvRe7V6b
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噗浪：http://www.plurk.com/sakuhyde1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQSr6rFzkVy
FB粉絲頁：https://www.facebook.com/meowbarksky1083Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLAbUjTgUMw
by 喵芭渴死姬 / 04.16.2016
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