"Daddy," Sammie asked, looking up from the coloring pages her two older siblings mocked her for and to the couch her father sat on, as if a thought just occurred to her.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXTaHSEPlZw
"Yes, Sammie?" Her father said, tearing his eyes from a (what Sammie considered terribly boring) book, looking above the tips of his reading glasses to look at her.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIZJgKORmHQ
"Where did you and Mommy meet?" Sammie tapped the crayon across her brow and clicked her feet together as she lay on the ground.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDbLRDHXf3
Her youngest brother, Thaddeus, whipped his head to his father from the other side of the living room. His computer game would have to wait. For he wished to know the story for many years passed.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsChOXJf4Nq
Jordie, the oldest (and most stuck up, according to Thaddeus) brother smiled to himself quietly and pushed his glasses higher up his nose like a professional anime character. Oh yes, he knew the story. He'd just been biding his time and patiently waiting for his little sister to ask the Golden Question. According to him, it was he that planted the idea in little Sammie's head... but that was a story for another time- a story much less important than the one his father was ready to tell by the look on his face.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaPtHdu6vEv
Their mother walked in as if she too was counting down the minutes until the question was asked. Jordie's smile reflected on her own face. She sat elegantly next to her husband and placed her hand on his knee.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IeN0VMPRf
The tension in the room rose when many seconds went by and the children started to become impatient. Except for Jordie, who still was doing that anime thing. He deserves an Oscar for that performance, seriously. He was still doing it. His mouth must be sore. But Jordie knew it wasn't. He had been working out his mouth for years now, waiting and preparing for this precise moment. Now was his moment. Now was his time to shine! Except for the fact that no one was even looking at him... but that didn't seem to bother him.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOAy21w2jL
As the tension grew- "Well?" Thaddeus demanded impatiently, ruining the moment for everyone else, especially Jordie who definitely had his creepy anime smile down. "How'd you guys freaking meet already?" For he knew that he was just a character for some stupid story for a competition of a writing sight for nerds that he never heard about. FOR HE KNEW THAT HE WAS SUPPOSED TO KEEP IT PG! Also, his parents were right there.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyizwAmpc2I
"Well," his father began, really dragging out the cinematic moment as he drew out a long, exasperated sigh, "It all started sixteen years ago today."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQ2WSDsmid
"Well that was f***ing convenient," Sammie said, forgetting to keep it PG and shocking everyone in the room... except Jordie, who was still doing that stupid anime glasses smile thingy.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMwpcgSLfx
"Indeed," her mother said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn1yGKKR85y
"Also, you're grounded after this," the father said, still somehow remaining looking and sounding dramatic as he looked dramatically out the window.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhwLLw7ypr
"Indeed," his wife said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWZcePJMUk
"Well," the father began his story, "Your mother and I were ready to settle down." Sammie could tell he was about to start to drone on, and she regretted asking him in the first place. "But one night we just said frick it," he winked to an imaginary camera like he was in The Office, "and both went to a bar."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVornM3nBg
Sammie gasped.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvehrIQRgl
Thaddeus looked disappointed.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsoc0SmtwC1
Jordie smiled creepily.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZaK9XwKdt
"What?" Their father said, "Adultery is boring you know."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKuTOngDnuL
"Indeed," his wife said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTdCx8U6dFF
"Uhh, dad," Thaddeus said, "I'm pretty sure that's not what Adultery means."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbObWpecLDg
"Nonsense," his father said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXqtCTBhr0
"Indeed," his wife said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlwp28wfjly
Jordie smiled creepily.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA0q3MMTnIj
"Okay, whatever," Thaddeus said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSZp9iZwnRR
"Then we got very- very drunk." Their father laughed.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDDq6QQoKEb
"INDEED," his wife said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrHFL3Kr4Ej
"We thought it would be funny to be criminals. That's how drunk we were." The children wondered if they were supposed to laugh, expect for Jordie, who still smiled creepily.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV42TqX2RX
He continued, "So we did. We killed the bartender and stole all the money in the cash register."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nn8ocxiif
"Wow... um okay. Very funny dad," Thaddeus said, noticing the scarred expression on Sammie's face.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIGdfPXDpd
"I'm not joking," his father said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvFGFSoyAe
"Indeed," his wife said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc2zlZnRKy8
Jordie smiled creepily, for this was his favorite part.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHWxsmaBq3
"We soon realized this is what God made us for on his good Earth," the father said. Sammie and Thaddeus blinked repeatedly. Jordie smiled creepily.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5uLyN43E2K
He went on dramatically, "They sent a few cops to stop us. HA! As if that could stop us. We were uncontrollable. We fell in love right there."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwQl0bOoUb9
"Okay, dad. That's cool. I think I'm satisfied now-" Thaddeus said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5Ff8dZdmJ
"I'm not done," he smiled almost as creepily as Jordie. "In fact, I'm only getting started." Jordie smiled.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJUOo3OEjr
"Oh great." Thaddeus sighed.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSASTpw2SMt
"Indeed," his mother said happily. Thaddeus wondered how he never noticed his mother's limited vocabulary.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1GCN8KOWsS
"They sent SWAT after us, but we were always one step ahead. We set up landmines around for miles." Jordie smiled. His father still went on: "We killed hundreds that day. No day after was ever like that. For a whole year, we went on like this, pillaging and murdering. It was beautiful. And bloody, very bloody."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKl7SsMLPr
"Indeed," his wife said.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnzNaU8Dncq
"Finally, we were captured and brought to justice." He laughed, "Funny that they thought they could hold us. We killed all the guards and inmates and got out. And after living life to the fullest for another year or so, we settled down, and had all of you." He sighed and smiled.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRu65AbIBu4
"HAH!" Thaddeus said, "I was waiting for you to admit it! Consider this your final bringing to JUSTICE! You think that I was just another, innocent, child? HAH! No. I was just biding my time! Waiting! Watching! You think Sammie asked you of her own accord? Of course not! Jordie actually planted that idea inside her head(Jordie smiled wider)! But guess who planted that idea inside of his head? (Jordie's smile finally vanished) You're all idiots! I was waiting for this moment for six years! Ever since the FBI recruited me into their forces when I was only three years old! I played my cards well, didn't I, father?" He ripped off a mask. He looked- exactly the same. His parents gasped. Jordie did, too, but he didn't know why.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuIzmz2Qyy
"That's right, who could've guessed that the SWAT captain you thought you killed would actually be your son using a time machine! The one you named me after! Thaddeus! HAHA, that's right! You thought you were always ahead, but no! I was always ahead! I've been ahead sixteen years ago! I was there that night at the bar! I was listening! I was always listening! I've been listening all my childhood life! You think I've always been listening to music and you could talk about your crimes because you thought I couldn't hear? NO! The pair you bought me four years ago doesn't even work anymore! I DON'T EVEN LIKE PUNK ROCK ANYMORE!"1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOsEALGJRhE
Gasps around the room.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyExIBLrLe
He continued, "Goodbye mother, father."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJI8ehS9rOq
"Indeed," her voice was deathly quiet."1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWU411MW1qW
"See you in hell, Mother f***ers!" Thaddeus said, forgetting that it was supposed to be PG. He pulled out a gun and killed his parents.1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xBSmjTZbR
The End
Why in the living hell did I write this?1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRdtgqZTc9
Based off a true story1006Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD26mcLJU4h
