I was sitting on a chair in front of a tall mirror, while mama stood at my back. She was combing my hair repeatedly as if wishing for it to grow long.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC46YdV8le2
"You are so beautiful, my sweet Judy," she said, smiling. "When you grow up, you will make a good mistress of our home."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CSLiCejIP
I closed my eyes and nodded in response.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzZFWwJADM
Whatever caused mama to be firm in raising me the way mothers bring up women confused me. She's been very vocal about her faith in God at home, in school, and most especially in the church, but she was also actively taking part in something that she knew was against His standards.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3vR5c53TRE
Her children, including yours truly, happened to be all-male, but instead of being thankful for His wonderful gifts, she was still wishing for something impossible.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO19Qd87TPN
When papa had not yet stepped on the ship, he once told us that Mama had always desired a daughter so that she could have someone to help her with the chores and bond with by combing and braiding hair, putting on make-up, dressing up, and other girly stuff.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvtBsfTOvJQ
He even said that when I was born, I looked—you know, like that girly type of angelic the media portrayed angelic to be: soft, white skin, pinkish lips, and round eyes covered in thick, curly lashes. So she raised me as a girl. Of course, papa was against it, but the last thing he wanted for himself was to endure Mama’s unbridled bombardment of snide remarks. So this angelic-looking twelfth grader suffered the consequences.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2F4k89yGf
My eyes flew open when something cold and hard buried itself in the strands of my hair. I fought the urge to raise an eyebrow as her butterfly hairpin sparkled above my right ear.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRoMPl8xHo
"There, beautiful." She appreciated before lacing her fingers through my hair for the last time. "I hope your hair grows longer. Let your beauty shine."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGKUCeSkuk
She held out her arm.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ13TsyKES6j
"Come, dear, we have to go to the market. We are running out of supplies."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUx2eOurTJP
I took her hand and allowed her to help me up.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQHQTNOugm
559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNPStlQRXb
We were about to leave for the market when one of my brothers arrived, carrying loads of supplies. It was our eldest. He placed the bags on the table when he reached the kitchen. Upon doing so, the band that kept his hair in a neat bun snapped, causing the black, wavy strands on his head to tumble about his broad shoulders.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwrRcyDz2I
"Oh, thank you so much, Joe, we didn't have to go to the market," said mama. "I hope we haven't taken up your time."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1Ndk0tCzd
"Nah," he answered in a deep voice.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6OPVzRTOE
I immediately arranged the supplies in our pantry, watching him sit by the head of the table and take off his damp, white shirt.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEqDsA1wW3
My lips tightened at the sight of it. I wish I was more like him. I wish I had his lean yet perfectly sculpted muscles, his hard, square face, his thin mustache, and his low, husky voice. But mama’s dream of having a daughter has wound me into becoming the keeper of the house. Me looking more like a girl must have added to it.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuV6LaCVXl
She sat on the right side and handed him a glass of water.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ASXeSrNpN
"Won't you miss work?" she asked.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoNILz7qqSm
He downed the water in one swallow. "No, I'm on a day off," Joe replied. "I could do the laundry."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnbTmUpDvB
"But you don't need to, my son. You are a man." She placed her hand on the ripped arm of my brother. "Besides, Judy is here. She can take care of everything."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIpkg7RPzZe
Joe's eyes darted on me as my hands mindlessly brushed my nearly skinny bicep. He smirked and chuckled.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq6lY3XsA7W
"Dude, you look like a plant. Can you take it off?" he said.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDaUQWqXzZ5
He was talking about that golden butterfly clip Mama planted in my hair. I sighed but in relief. Finally, somebody realized just how awkward that looked.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuF3qGPwjG
My brother stood and walked toward me, reaching out his fingers to remove that embarrassing piece from my head.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ75dEkbC6eB
"There," he said, grinning like a dog. "Better."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHIb6PZmBRC
He went back to his seat.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhurRPQVsSq
Mama's eyes widened in horror. "Joseph! Why did you do that? Don't you see how pretty your sister looks?"559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmoJs8710n
Joe turned his attention on mama.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoClwjeHvkN
"Ma, Judah is my brother." He allowed the clip to twist between his thumb and forefinger.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuxmcbya5Fi
Mama gently took the clip from him and enclosed his big hands in her brown fingers.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWB3ZP8bpcD
She explained in a soft voice, "My dear boy, I understand where you are coming from, but you do remember my dream, right?"559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGw3LTBPqn
Joe did not answer, so she gave him a nudge.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ILkuow6Ma
"Right, anak?” Mama insisted.559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIRhRoGD58R
His eyes rolled upward and he chuckled. "Judy."559Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyo8vVnww5J
Then he rose from his seat and headed to his room.
Penana
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